Fighting and Rooms!!!

Updated on September 27, 2013
M.T. asks from Chandler, AZ
22 answers

So since we are moving,we really cant afford a 5 bedroom house.We got a 4 bedroom;.My husband and I in a room,so now it depends on who gets there own room and who has to share.Becasue the baby is gonna have her own room and it al depends if my 13 yr old or 10 yr old will share with there 4 yr old sister.I have been thinking of my 13 yr old share a room because they are both girls but since she is the oldest she needs her privacy.How can i get this set up without any fighting invloved?

my 13 yr old and 4 yr old and my 1 month old are all girls.
My 10 yr old is a boy

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So What Happened?

So we bring in the beds Sunday and so we gave the 3 there own rooms and the baby will sleep with us!!BUSY WEEKEND!!

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J.☯.

answers from Springfield on

I would keep the baby with me, for now. Middle of the night feedings? So much easier if baby is right next to me. But ultimately, I would put baby with the 4 year old. The 10 year old and 13 year old are much more in need of their own space. The 4 year old will more than likely think it's cool to share a room.

Keep in mind that living arrangements can change in a few years ... when the 13 year old is off to college!

3 moms found this helpful

V.S.

answers from Reading on

I agree with Doris Day - 4 and baby together - eventually if not immediately. Teens should have their own rooms.

2 moms found this helpful

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C.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I would have the 4 year old and 1 month old share a room. Your 13 year old will need her privacy and you son will soon too. Also with him being the only boy, he will want his own space to just unwind (I would think) especially as he gets older.

7 moms found this helpful
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T.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

Put the baby in your room until she is sleeping through the night and then let her and the 4 year old share a room. The 13 and 10 yr olds should have their own room. They are older and need their privacy. You should give the 4 yr old and the baby the biggest room since they are sharing.

6 moms found this helpful
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C.C.

answers from New York on

13 and 10 need their own rooms!! No question about it!!

Either 4 and baby share, or, keep the baby in the master bedroom til you figure something else out.

13 or 10 sharing with 4 is a BAD idea.

ETA: Remember - by the time 4 is 10, 13 will be 19 (away at college, can sleep in basement, etc). Have the 4 and baby share til 4 is 10.

6 moms found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

13 girl - own room
10 boy - own room
4 girl & baby girl share a room.

5 moms found this helpful

L.M.

answers from Dover on

I would give the 13 & 10 each their own rooms and have the 4 yr old and the one month old girls share.

The oldest two are enough older than the other two that they shouldnt' be sharing with the younger ones. Since one is a boy and one is a girl, they can't really share with each other either.

Realistically, it makes the most sense to put the baby with your toddler but until she's a bit older, can't you let her crib be in your room?

5 moms found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Oldest need their own rooms. Honestly the baby should be in your room. Take the biggest room possible for yourself and make part of it for the baby.

Now, if you have a really big walk-in closet, I've seen those turned into tiny baby rooms. You could get an armoir or something for your and hubby's clothes if that is a workable solution.

Babies don't NEED a whole room. Heck, my husband and I lived in an efficiency - one room with a bathroom and kitchen, with our baby till he was 6 months old. He had a crib, his changing table was the top of a dresser.

4 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

The 10 year old boy and 13 year old girl, need their own rooms.
One is a Tween, the other is a Teen.
They need their own room.
Just is.
They should not be in a room, with much younger siblings.
They are 2 totally different ages and development.

The baby can be in a crib in YOUR room. She's a baby. And so the baby will not wake, the 4 year old all darn night with wakings and you going in there for feedings.
Meanwhile the 4 year old can be in the other bedroom by herself.
Once the baby is older, then baby can segue into the room with the 4 year old. Who will then be older too.
With both my kids when they were babies, we had them in a crib in our room. Not with the older child. Babies wake, need feedings, and make noise and I had to do the feedings/nursings. I would not have my younger child in the same room as my eldest, when he was a baby because, I'd want my eldest to have sleep. Not be disrupted by a baby waking all darn night or for feedings or diaper changes.

4 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

If the ten year old is a boy then he will need his own room. He can't share a room with either a 13 year old or four year old sister. What sex is the baby? In a couple of years the baby can share, then the oldest can get her own room at that time.

ETA: When the baby is a little bigger she can share with the four year old, then the older boy and girl can each have their own room.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

I am still stuck on why you would even consider putting the 1 month old in her own room. Put her crib in the corner of your room for the next year or so and then when she has a regular sleep pattern move her in with the 4 year old.

Little kids benefit from sleeping in the same room with siblings, big kids need their own space.

3 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

The baby doesn't need her own room. Babies don't care and can sleep anywhere. I would keep her in your room for now and then put her in with the 4 year old.

3 moms found this helpful
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D..

answers from Miami on

You'll have war in your house if you put the 4 year old in with your 10 or 13 year old. Keep the baby in your room or refit a large closet if you can. Once the baby is old enough to walk, move her into the 4 year old's room, OR put the baby and the 4 year old together.

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J.S.

answers from Phoenix on

Patricia G. I thought we were the only ones strange enough to do that! We have 6 kids and we have a 4 bedroom house. For the last two houses, we've managed to have a LARGE master walk in closet. So we converted it into a bedroom for your youngest since she was a baby now 4. Her twin bed, a bookshelf, dresser, and toys all fit just fine. There is a vent in there for ac or heat. We keep our clothes in wardrobe closets in our bedroom that we purchased at ikea. I know we can't do it forever but for now it works. Could you do that??? Then my two step daughters 6.5 & 10.5 share a room, my boys 6.5 & 9 share a room, and my 13 year old step son has his own room.

If that isn't an option, then I would keep baby with you for as long as possible then put her with 4 year old. Give the older two their privacy.

Good luck!

3 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Why is putting a 10 year old boy and a 4 year old girl in the same room even an option? Why is there not an option to bunk the baby with the 4 year old? They are both girls and closest in age.

I was one of five growing up, the second oldest and middle girl. I NEVER got my own room and I can tell you it's something we still talk about today. My parents made the right choice though. My older sister is 2 years older, then two boys that are 2 and 4 years younger than I am, and then a sister 6 years younger. It made the most sense to bunk the two older girls, the two boys, and the baby girl in the three rooms.

My oldest and middle (girl and boy) shared a room for a year when they were 3 and 1 because they wanted to. They each had their own rooms, but they always bunked together in that house. It was okay at that age - not now and they are 10 and 8.

Your best bet is to give the 13 year old a room (the second biggest of the 3 non-master rooms), the 10 year old the smallest room, and the 4 year old and baby the biggest of the three rooms. That is how I would do it and I wouldn't even think twice about it.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

If the 10 year old is a boy and the other two both girls I would do that split, he is getting older and will need his privacy as well, better to have the two girls share.

2 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Well, I shared with my brother for a long time, since we were less than a year apart and then later I shared with my 4 years younger than me sister. I honestly liked sharing with my brother more because we did our own thing and didn't get in each other's way, where the littler one always wanted to be with me. Plus the younger one, in your case, would have a much different bedtime than the 10 and 13 year olds. If none of them have the option of their own room, who would prefer to share? You can split the older kids' room like a dorm room so they have a semblance of privacy, but I bet neither of them would want to share with the much younger kids.

And honestly, I don't understand the point of them having their own room. I haven't. I shared with my brother, then my sister, then my roommates in college, and now my husband. I have a friend who bought a 3 bedroom and still put the 2 girls together and the third bedroom is her husband's office.

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

Older two get their own rooms and the younger two share. If the 4 year old can't sharing (it happens) your infant can move in with you and hubby. I've known people who've had drawers and laundry baskets as beds for the first few months of life.

Good luck!

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S.R.

answers from Washington DC on

do you have a basement where the teenager can hang out and maybe sleep?

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

The boy and any of the girls cannot share a room at all. I can't say enough to you that in any way this would be okay because it's not.

The baby cannot share a room with a child that has toys because that baby will pick up something, put it in their mouth and choke to death. You can't limit the 4 year old's toys to just baby toys either, that's just not right. SO you do have a dilemma.

I'd say you guys need to turn an attic into a room or partition off part of a garage and make a room. Everyone would be happier that way.

My choice would be to move the baby in with us and give everyone else their own room because that would be fair to the kids and they come first.

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L.R.

answers from Tucson on

Let the 13 year old share with the 1 month old :-) She won't want her
own kid anytime soon after that! :-)

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

I would put two kids to a room and have a guest room. I would start off with the baby in the guest room but as soon as he/she is older (2?) I would move him/her to the room with the 4 yr old. You don't say the sexes of each child. I'd do boys together and girls together if you have 2 of each.

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