I have three cousins (all in same family) that recently friended me, I accepted even though we haven't spoke to them in years, losing contact for some reason. I recently found out that they have a close connection to someone from my past who put my x husband, 20 yr old son and I thru hell. I don't want to delete these cousins since they are my relatives and it's kind of nice to be somewhat connected again, but I don't want this person being able to see my pictures and status' if she happens to be at one of their homes. I have a great deal of fear of her and very paranoid and don't want to put my family thru what my x, son and I went thru. Is there anything I can do to block them outside of having to delete them all together? If she knows what my younger kids look like from my pictures, I can't relax, knowing she has it in her to pick them up on their way home from school.
I've have restraining orders back when living with x but now that I'm married again and have 3 more kids, it's a scary knowing she can see my stuff. So what I'd like to do is for my profile pic to stay there but for them not to see my status' or pics. Is that possible?
If you have to worry about this woman stealing your children, you shouldnt have a facebook with their pictures on it.
this is why my family is NOT on facebook. I mean, really ---- just give the people you want to give your email address too. We don't have facebook and just do email. My life is stress-free not worrying about Exhusbands and all that drama. I think I'm the only 30 yr old not on FB, but in the end, drama-free life is nice. And my family is safe and protected.
So do what you have to to protect your family, be that deleting these cousins (give them your email address), delete your FB page all together, or take all your pics off of your page. Just have your one profile pic of yourself.
You can block them and they will never see your profile. When you block him, your profile won't even exist to them, they can't view anything about it and it won't come up in searches. Scroll down on their profile and on the bottom left side you will see a block/report button. You don't have to report them to block them. Make sure your cousin knows not to mention you publicly on her facebook.
You can click customize on photo albums to exclude people on your friends list.
(I am speaking of your cousins, so that they can't show this person the photos if this person is at one of the cousins' house)
yes, it is possible to block her. but if she is at one of your cousins houses, she could look at your stuff. if you are truly afraid of her doing harm I would delete your cousins. you could explain it to them if you wanted....or not. personally, I would not. but if I had any thought that someone might creep on my family, I would delete and block them asap. take care!
In the privacy area just pick "only me" on EVERYTHING and then no one can see anything.
If you have people that you dont want to know things then maybe facebook is not the place for you at this juncture.
If you want complete peace of mind, just get off facebook. Their privacy settings reset every so often, potentially leaving you vulnerable. Any information and pics you want to send, you can send the cousins online.
That said, I think the next piece of the puzzle is to have a simple conversation with your cousins. "Person X created a lot of trouble and upset (or 'made our lives hell', but then be prepared for a larger conversation) in our lives, and we'd appreciate it if you did not share any of our family information with her. Or just choose not to send them pics.
In my opinion, if you are having this much anxiety about being on FB, it's probably not worth it. Period.
There are 4 + 2 halves levels of security on FB
Everyone
Friends of Friends
Friends Only
Only Me
1/2 = blocking individuals.
1/2 = not allowing internet searches to find you
If you want ONLY the people you friend to see your schtuff... just set it to "friends only" ((although, obviously they can show someone else on their own screen or copy/paste)). That's the level I have my stuff set at. So only those people (and anyone they show from their screen... spouses, friends IRL, etc. can see it). I have a "smallish" circle of 'friends' at around 70. That's the level that just shows everyone else your profile pic and nothing else.
My husband has over 300 "friends" on his personal page (his band also had a page) and had his set at "friends of friends". Which (using an ap a year ago) showed that over 11,000 people had access to his page. Still less than millions, but 11k is an *awful* lot of people
1/2 = blocking individuals... you can find another person's page and add them to your blocked list. You just scroll down to the bottom of the page and click "report/block this user"
1/2 = making yourself "unlisted"... means that in google/yahoo/etc searches of your name (or partial name, info, etc.) your facebook page doesn't come up.
There is no amount of social reconnecting through facebook that is worth putting your family at risk, or putting yourself through this kind of torment.
If you have restraining orders on someone that had the potential to come across your FB page, I would not have a FB page.
I'm sorry but you don't need to "friend" relatives if that possibility is still there.
If you still chose to have FB, I would have it on the highest possible privacy settings with NO pictures.
Protecting ones family comes first.
You can block that person completely, and you can block your cousins from viewing certain post & photo albums. Its an effort though.
Plain & simple get your cousins direct contact information then delete them off Facebook if you want to stay in contact send them a text,e-mail,snail mail or pick up the phone & chat...
De-friend them & block them. If your family's safety or well being is a concern, definitely do this. If they are friends with someone who put you through hell, why would you want to be connected with them anyway?
Okay - first off - DO NOT LIVE YOUR LIFE IN FEAR - if that is the case - you are NOT LIVING!!! Stop acting like a victim. (I am NOT trying to be rude or insincere, please understand that). Yes, this person did bad things to you (enough to warrant a restraining order) however, living in fear and as a victim is not living your life.
I would hope that you have learned from the past and will NOT let it repeat itself. If you have had restraining orders against her - then make sure they are current.
Ensure that your children's school is VERY CLEAR on WHO can pick up your children.
One thing that you can do to protect yourself on-line is ensure that your current city is close but not exact. In fact, you don't need to state it.
You can set your privacy settings so that no one can see things...go to your FB home page - your wall/profile and select "privacy settings" and select ONLY FRIENDS who can see your posts, pics, etc. then SELECT the customize settings - this will allow you to restrict what the people who have a close relationship with her can see...
I would NOT go to them and ask them to remove or delete her - ensure she is blocked on YOUR wall - you don't want to stir everything up again - I know some people will tell you to just make your life easier and delete them - think and pray on it. If you don't want to lose this connection with cousins then don't.
Although it is wonderful to catch up with old friends and relatives, in this case it's not worth it. I say this because as mentioned below you can in fact block her and set privacy settings on your photos/posts for your cousins. But keep this in mind, EVERYTIME fb makes a software change and update you have to go back in and reset your settings because inevitably some of them are changed. Did you know they recently made another change where your phone/cell numbers are listed in the phonebook? (Account, edit friends, click on phonebook on left hand side, you will see all your friends #'s listed.) If I were you I would simply email/private message your cousins. They are I'm sure aware of the restraining order you had to have years ago. Tell them honestly you are not comfortable opening up that can of worms and subjecting your family to possible turmoil from this person. Explain that for this reason you will be deleting them from your fb account. If you choose to, you could give them your email addy to keep in touch thereby avoiding any possible conflicts with this person. Good luck and God Bless.
it's possible to set it so only certain friends can see your pictures and things, and you can make it so those 3 people cant. It's under your privacy settings, and things I share, at the top left hand corner under the account drop down menu.
Uhmmm...if they caused your family that much hell...i would just delete them altogether. Sorry...hope that helps. Good luck
I think you need to do what is going to make you feel most comfortable. You can set Facebook settings pretty high but will need to check them everyonce in awhile as past changes in the site have changed security levels or left new enhancements not secured. If you decide to delete them from Facebook as friends, explain to them why. You don't have to go into detail and can be general about it. If they know what happened they should understand and respect your concern. Especially if you give them your contact information. Also, if you delete them and she is on Facebook, block her and also make sure your information is such that she would have a hard time finding you. I agree about not living in fear but you also need to act so there isn't a reason to live in fear.
I would delete your cousins and tell them why and it's nothing personal. Give them your phone number and ask them to keep in touch. Nothing is worth the safety of your family.
Just make sure that only your friends can view your stuff and then if this person goes to your profile, they can't see anything but your profile pic. Now if this person sees your stuff off your cousins computer, then there isn't much you can do there. Hope this helps.
I have a similiar situation except it's my husband's grown daughter. She is completely pyscho. I have a fb page but I have it ultra private. I don't even use my real name nor do I put an actual profile pic. I also have her emails blocked specifically on my fb and on my email accounts. I also have my pictures blocked from everyone except from my fb friends. Their friends can't see them. Everyone who is part of the family who are on fb are aware of the situation and they refuse to "friend" her on their fb. She has tried on multiple occasions trying to get someone to befriend her. It did happen one time and when I saw that she was on of my fb friends page, I deleted that fb friend. I feel pretty safe doing it the way I am doing it but if I see that she is still able to get information off of mine in some way, I will delete it. For another thing, I hardly ever post anything about my family on my fb page anyways. I mainly play the games that are on there and I do keep in touch with others. If they do not respect my wishes to keep her away, I have no hesitation in deleting them off of my fb. Unfortunately, I have learned the hard way, there is not a 100% way of keeping everything away from her but I will not make it easy. Besides, if she was to get info and then try to use it againist me, in other words start harrassing us again, I won't hesitate to sue her for harrassment and file for a no contact order. I've got the proof and I can also show what I have done to keep her from contacting me. My advice to you is to delete the ones who have this person as one of the fb friends. If they don't understand why you have had to delete them, then that's their problem. You have to do everything you can do to protect your family. There are other ways for them to stay in contact with you. Stand your ground. Do not take any chances. Like I said, I completely understand what you are going through. Hang in there.
You should add this person to your block list, make sure everything is private & if you are afraid your cousins would be looking at your account while at their house, then yes, delete your cousins.
You can block non-friends from seeing your photos. You can't block people you've friended though from seeing your photos. What is the likelihood she will be at your distant relatives home looking at your profile? Perhaps they are not even close to this woman. It would never hurt to ask them to ensure she does not receive your information, otherwise you will have to block them for your children's safety and you wouldn't want to resort to that. Go ahead and block this woman though so that she won't see you posting on your cousin's wall or won't be able to look you up.
Okay, I just Sara's answer. I didn't realize you can pick and choose which friend's sees your photos. That is nice to know.
Tell your relatives what the issue is, delete them from your friends list, and exchange letters, phone calls, or emails to keep in touch.
You can block anyone you want from being able to find you on FB or even seeing your profile. It'll be like, with them, you just don't exist in their FB world. I can't remember how I was able to do it but I do know that it is under the account settings. I was actually pretty simple to find and do so I'm sure, if you play with it a little bit, you'll be able to figure it out also.
To add to what Riley said, you can also block certain friends of yours from seeing thing too when you go under those settings. They are still your friends they can only see what you allow them to see.
S.
You can block her, than she can not see any of your stuff.
Click on her name then look for the box that says 'block this person' - left side under the friends list. She shouldn't be able to see anything about you on your or anyone else's page. Also set your settings to 'friends only' for everything. You should be set after that.
