Face Mask or Am I Being Unreasonable?

Updated on July 11, 2012
S.F. asks from West Palm Beach, FL
15 answers

I have an 11 week old baby girl who is exclusively breastfed. She eats well and sleeps well. I feel as if I have come down with a minor cold (minor because I have a sore slightly throat and stuffy nose, but that is it). I thought it was just allergies or from sleeping with the fan pointed at me at first, but when the symptoms didn't go away I assumed it was a cold. I should mention that my sil and her 3 kids were in town recently. She believed that they had come down with a cold toward the end of their trip and I had spent some time with them. My hubby mentioned this morning that he thought maybe I should wear one of those face masks so that I didn't breathe on our daughter. I told him I didn't think it was necessary as she has already been exposed and is ebf. I also mentioned that I dont know any other parents who have worn one. He mentioned that if they cared then they would. I was not very happy with that response and let him know it. It did not cause an argument, but I don't think he is satisfied with me not wearing one. I should also mention that he has two doctors in his family (both of which are germophobes by nature) and his entire family is made up of highly germophobic people. I myself come from a family that tries to take precautions, but has the mindset that you are gonna get dirty and gonna catch germs and that it is a part of life and living like the bubble boy does you more harm than good. By no means do I wish my baby sick, but I don't think wearing a face mask is needed. I am a teacher and she is going to be exposed when I go back to work. It is not as if I have the ebola virus, I have a minor cold (with no fever). There is not much I can do about that. What do you think? Am I being unreasonable? Anyone else wear a mask when they got a cold?

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So What Happened?

thank you ladies. i was not planning on wearing it, but i was wondering what others thought. glad to know i am not being unreasonable and that most of you agree with me. plus, who actually has face masks lying around the house?? lol... i know i could go buy some, but i still dont see the point. thank you once again. :)

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

I am comfortable in a face mask when I deem it appropriate. When my baby was a few months old (3, 4, 5 months) and my husband was sick (cold/flu), I made him wear a mask. I don't think that there's a right or wrong.

2 moms found this helpful

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

LOL. My son had a cold from week 3-9 months. I just reminded myself it's good for building up the immune system.

Your hubby is funny. A face mask. LOL. Poor girl. I can't wait till she brings home a tattooed boyfriend.

11 moms found this helpful
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J.T.

answers from New York on

Seriously??? No you do not need a face mask. She has already been exposed, and she is getting anitbodies etc from you every time she nurses.

Also... check out / print out some of those studies on triclosan and other anti bacterials. It appears they do more harm than good.

Normal exposure, ie incidental to every day life, can be benefical because it helps build up the immune system.

Good luck!

ETA: My daughter now 4 gets sick maybe 2x a year (knock wood not at all so far this year). Since she was about 8 months old she was in baby classes and now she was in pre-school in the winter and camp in the summer with plenty of exposure to lots of kids. So the old saw that kids always get sick once they are in school / day care is not always true...

9 moms found this helpful

T.N.

answers from Albany on

Teehehe, your husband annoys me!

If a nursing baby is going to catch mom's cold, she's going to catch it whether you wear a mask or not. I mean it's pretty much ALL OVER bodily contact ALL the time.

Tell your husband that half the point in nursing is your daughter is getting YOUR antibodies, right?

No you are not unreasonable, he's just weird.

:)

8 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

with all due respect, your dh is a little nuts.
:) khairete
S.

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K.P.

answers from New York on

This is actually making me laugh today! No, I would not wear a surgical mask to BF my child if I had a cold unless you were planning on wearing one all day long!

Funny story... a friend of mine (a doctor) went to visit another friend's new baby. The wife was a little anal, which we all knew but wow. When she walked into the house, there was a sign asking visitors to remove their shoes or wear surgical booties. Then, when my friend asked if she could hold the baby, the mother promptly handed her a hair tie to pull back her hair so the baby wouldn't be exposed to allergens or the smell of her shampoo. She then informed my "doctor friend" that they only allow the baby's skin to come into contact with Tide Free detergent, so they have provided smocks for guests to wear.

This kid's going to have one long life... and constant illnesses if he doesn't build up some kind of immunity! Needless to say, we just sent a gift and a card. Not worth the strip search and Lysol shower to see the baby.

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J.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

awww cute worried first time dad=) nope i wouldn't wear one

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J.☯.

answers from Springfield on

Your daughter has already been exposed. I agree with you completely. Obviously it would be nice if she didn't get sick, but everyone gets sick eventually. We do what we can - wash hands, keep surfaces clean, try not to expose her to too much - but the reality is, we all get sick sometimes and your daughter is no exception. Even if you were able to prevent her from getting this cold, she is still going to get a cold one day.

It isn't fun when your little one gets a cold, but you get through it. Our oldest had his fair share of colds as a baby (only child, exclusively breast-fed, not much of a social life early on). He had a couple of really bad colds as a baby, but he was only sick 2 times in PreK.

My youngest had an older brother and got carried around from activity to activity and exposed to lots of people. He went through phases where we though his nose would never stop running, but it was usually just annoying colds. Nothing too strong. He's only 3, but hopefully will be in pretty good shape when he starts school. We're hoping to not have too many sick days.

Colds are a part of life, and she has to start building those immunities some day. I would keep washing your hands and taking basic precautions (like you said you already do), but I wouldn't worry, and I certainly wouldn't wear a mask!

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F.M.

answers from Lincoln on

no, i would not worry about wearing a face mask. she is more than likely already exposed. you have a few good reasons on your side. first off, when babies get sick (bless their hearts) they start to build up their own immunities to infections, so a plus! :) another good thing, Breastmilk is full of anitibodies and the best for her, so even if she gets sick, drinking BM is the best for her! Good luck!

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A.F.

answers from Fargo on

Hahahaha! Oh good golly, NO, you don't have to wear a mask! Your husband was rude to imply that you don't care about your baby if you don't wear a mask. :( Sometimes fear causes people to be manipulative. Don't feel like you are less of a mom!

I despise germs, but sometimes things are out of our control and.........then nothing happens. Two years ago, when my daughter was three, we stopped for ice cream and my daughter stepped in a bright orange pool of melted sherbet. She sat down and promply licked the sherbet off her shoe "so it wouldn't be sticky". I nearly had a coronary! Of course, she didn't get sick and my heart rate went back to normal after a few days. :)

There will be times when you wish you could do a bleach dip for your kids because of germ exposure, but mommy having a cold isn't one of them! :)

5 moms found this helpful

L.U.

answers from Seattle on

HAhahahaha! So, he thinks that you shouldn't breathe on the baby, but it's okay for you to give her your milk? You SHOULD breastfeed her and she will get the antibodies from you to fight her the cold virus.
When my daughter was 7 months old I was hospitalized with pneumonia. I fought it for 3 weeks before I needed to go to the hospital for 4 days. My baby and boys (6 and 9) were with me every single day and none of them got sick.
L.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Unreasonable. Not that we want our babies to be sick, but nursing provides her antibodies from you and your close contact means she's already been exposed. Nursing her right now is one of the best things you can do, no masks required. Just wash your hands after you sneeze or whatever. I do not wear a mask when I am sick. I just wash my hands, use tissues, cover my mouth when I sneeze, etc. You know that drill. You DO care and his comment was rude. You just don't think a mask for a minor illness is required. Will he want HER to wear a mask when she gets a sniffle? That would be silly. As a teacher, you know how kids are little germ factories. She'll get sick now and then and be fine. I think your DH is the one that's unreasonable.

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L.M.

answers from Dover on

I agree with you. She's been exposed to you and your sil and her family already. She is in your care so just be careful...wash your hands, be mindful of letting her be in your face, etc.

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K.W.

answers from Seattle on

I remember when I was a new parent, too... :-)

Your hubby is being unreasonable. And being a germophobe is likely to make one less healthy, not more healthy.

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D..

answers from Charlotte on

Well, Steph, the first time your baby comes down with a cold, you will become a germaphobe too. My baby came down with a virus that he caught FROM ME when he was 4 weeks old. It was scary and it was awful. Like an idiot I took him to a party around other people, and a woman there was sick. It was like we were germ magnets!

If your baby misses your cold, you will be lucky indeed. You can talk about bubble boy and and mindsets all you want, but the first time your baby gets really sick, all of that will go out the window and you will feel terrible. A minor cold is NOT minor to a baby. I know because it happened to mine.

At least you have docs in the family and they can help you when the going gets rough.

As far as the facemask is concerned, it IS a good idea, but you'd need to change it every 20 minutes or so because you need to breathe clean air yourself in order to get well. If you are breathing the droplets with your germs in them in your facemask, it makes it harder for you to get over what ails YOU.

Wash your hands often. Go ahead and wear the mask while you nurse and then throw it away. Ask others to hold the baby so you aren't handling her all the time.

And when you put her in daycare, yes, she will catch everything that comes around. She'll be older and that will help. But it IS h*** o* you and on her. (Make sure you have someone set for sick care so that you don't have to miss a whole lot of work. The upside is that she will have a stronger constitution when she goes to kindergarten BECAUSE she caught this stuff in daycare.)

Hope she misses this cold...
Dawn

1 mom found this helpful
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