Eight Year Old Won't Use Night Lamp

Updated on October 18, 2008
C.A. asks from Youngsville, NC
25 answers

My eight year old daughter will not sleep with her lamp on all night. This was the purpose of me getting the lamp. She prefer her TV on all night even though she eventually falls to sleep. She claim that she is so scare of the dark. But when she spends weekends away at grandparents. It is no TV at all but a much smaller night lamp than her dora one.

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K.S.

answers from Raleigh on

I'm 63, this problem is temporary, and not to sweat the small stuff in life. If the TV screen gives her light, who cares. What bothers me more is that she has a tv in her room at all and she is watching it before bed each night. I would never have a tv in a child's room. This is where she should be reading and sleeping. Good luck, and I hope you make a full recovery.

3 moms found this helpful
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A.B.

answers from Charlotte on

What's the problem? Use a nightlight and call it a night! In my opinion, there should not be a TV in a kids bedroom, just causes problems later on, and it should definitely not be on at night. Their little bodies need the sleep and the constant stimulation from the TV, sound or no sound is not healthy for a young, growing child who needs their sleep! Good luck.
A. B

2 moms found this helpful
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L.C.

answers from Raleigh on

Girl ,she just wants to watch TV.....it has been proven to be unhealthy (before bed)Get it out of the room!!!!!!:)

2 moms found this helpful

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N.G.

answers from Fayetteville on

An eight yr old doesn't need a t.v. in her room. There's nothing but adult programming on at night anyway. You're taking a big chance that much of her innocence will be stolen by the trash that's aired at night. I would take it out and put a small night light in its place. Remember: YOU are the parent. YOU know what's best. She's just trying to get her way. If you give in, you're setting yourself up for failure as she grows older.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.H.

answers from Nashville on

I wonder if she is reacting more to your accident, than actually being afraid of the dark. It might be something you want to explore.

2 moms found this helpful
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B.C.

answers from Nashville on

She is spoiled to the TV and is pulling your leg by telling you she is scared. She needs to be told no to the TV and that she can use the lamp or sleep in the dark. She is plenty old to do this. The more you let her do things like this to you the more other things she will pull. I know a 9 year old that does the same thing and his mom just lets him. He will stay awake all hours after being put to bed watching the TV. Yes, eventually he will fall asleep but she needs a full nights rest to be able to function well in school. Set a bedtime, turn off the TV, turn on the lamp and leave her in the room to fall asleeep; she will get the message.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.M.

answers from Memphis on

If a tv isn't necessary at grandma's then its not necessary at home. My best friend lets her kids fall asleep with the tv on, but I don't agree with a child even having a tv in their bedroom. My kids are younger but my oldest, who's 4yrs, falls asleep to a music cd and a night light. He has a desk lamp by his bed too that he sometimes wants on so that he can "read" for a few minutes but he always turns it off when he's done.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.T.

answers from Fayetteville on

Hello C.,

It sounds like your daughter is getting over on you! If she can sleep at her grandparents home without the tv and she uses a night light then maybe she just know that you will give in. My children got over on me too, until I seen their father tell them to do the very same thing I told them and they listened to him. If you really want that tv off at night and the night light on stick to it!!!
Best Wishes!

2 moms found this helpful
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L.W.

answers from Greensboro on

I'd take the tv out of her room until she realizes it's the lamp or nothing. If she does it at her grandparents house, she'll do it at home too. She's workin' ya!

1 mom found this helpful
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E.M.

answers from Louisville on

so... whats the problem?

1 mom found this helpful
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V.C.

answers from Wheeling on

Hi, C.!
I'd like to recommend that your daughter (and anyone else) have the very smallest light possible with just enough light to help her find her way in the dark (to the bathroom, the light switch, etc). It's been found that sleeping with much light increases the incidence of near-sightedness. Our eyes were made to rest at night, but a light on makes the eyes want to kind of strain to 'focus' -- and even moreso if the light is 'flickery' (as a TV is). Also, our kids are overstimulated in today's society as it is, and they don't need MORE during their sleep! A room as quiet, still, and dark as possible is best all the way around.

1 mom found this helpful
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T.S.

answers from Knoxville on

I also never let my children go to sleep with the t.v. Maybe you could switch lamps with her grandparents as she probably spends more nights with you.Children always act better for other people so maybe she'd be fine with Dora at her grandparents. If that doesn't work then maybe she'll have to get used to sleeping with no light. Whatever you decide just stick with it and she will get used to it and it no longer will be an issue.
Good luck and I hope this helped.

1 mom found this helpful
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B.P.

answers from Charleston on

The first thing I would try is one of the small nightlights that you plug into the outlet. If that still doesn't work then 8 year old is slyly pulling Mommy's leg. The same thing happened with my youngest at about the same age. The small night light she said made her scared and she needed her TV on to sleep. I told her that there would be NO TV for her to go to sleep, she had to choose between two nightlights I had bought her or else the TV would go out of the room completely. She chose the small night light that plugs into the wall. The threat of taking the TV out was worse than using a regular night light. Which was actually the first night light she ever had from the beginning and pre-TV in her room.
B.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.S.

answers from Hickory on

Who is the parent, and who is the child? Who is running things? You say "she won't." I'll bet you mean that "she won't without a whole lot of fussing and kicking and screaming and I just don't want to go through that." Well, just do it. She needs to learn that she doesn't get everything she wants. She should already know this, but it's never too late. If you don't teach her this now, you will be having a teenager running all over you. GOOD LUCK!

1 mom found this helpful
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T.E.

answers from Nashville on

Hi C.,

I think you have gotten a lot of good advice. Particularly the woman who said that maybe your daughter was feeling anxious about your car accident.

She may actually be afraid at night. Or feeling something she can't quite explain since she is just 8 years old. Or of course she could just be trying to stay up to watch TV, or some of both.

Since she told you that she was scared then I think you should work at it from that angle. Even when you are afraid of something you have to address your fears and can't use something to comfort you that is not good for you in the long run.

Maybe you could develop some kind of strategy for what she could do when she is afraid.

Here's an article I found that you might find useful.
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/18855/is_your_ch...

1 mom found this helpful
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L.W.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi C.,
It may be that she is responding to the after effects of your car accident. This is not unusual and with children this response of insecurity is slower to come on and slower to recover from than with adults. Consider talking to her and maybe even some therapy..sand play or body work. This may also be helpful for your own recovery. Good luck!
L. Wilkinson www.laurelwilkinson.com

1 mom found this helpful
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A.C.

answers from Charleston on

My SIL went through this same thing with my niece (also 8) Finally she fell asleep in school one day and the teacher asked if she slept and she said no she was watching TV all night. Turns out (after some questioning) she was wanting the TV on cause she would wake up at 2am and watch TV. If the TV was already on mom and dad couldnt hear it come on in the night. They took the TV out of her room and put a plug in night light and she's perfectly fine now.

With that being said, you might want to try removing the TV for a little while and see if anything changes.

EDIT: might want to look into a radio or sound machine for her room too.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.U.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi C., if she's scared of the dark, the lamp should do the trick, unless she just wants that TV on! This sounds exactly like something my 8 y.o. daughter would try to do : ) Everyone is different, but I'd pull that TV out of her room anyway so she doesn't have constant access to a TV, it sounds like she's very attached to it (so is my daughter, so that's not an insult, it's easy to let it happen and they love the 'escape' it provides). You could tell her that her room is for playing and reading, not TV. That way she can read herself to sleep with her lamp on. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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R.B.

answers from Nashville on

Why does an 8 year old have a tv in her room?Take the tv out.She'll fall asleep.

1 mom found this helpful
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T.C.

answers from Knoxville on

would she use a bright night light that plugs into the wall instead of a lamp?

1 mom found this helpful
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W.M.

answers from Nashville on

I would just get one of the nightlights that plug in and that is it. I would tell her that it is not up to her and the tv is going to be turned off at a specific time. She is old enough to follow instructions and be able to conform to a nightlight. On the other hand, there are tvs that have timers that turn off after a certain amount of time. I would not want her to get into this habit and would break it now. There are pretty lights too, that shine on the ceiling, flash pretty colors, etc

W.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.T.

answers from Nashville on

I think it is really what they get use to. When she goes to grandma's house there is no tv in that room therefore she never got OR.... you continue to allow the tv to stay on all night. Maybe you could go in and turn it off before you go to bed. Maybe you could go in and just mute it before you go to bed.
I don't know that either are harmful BUT I will tell you this. I use to go to sleep with the tv on and wake up at 3 or 4 and turn it off. (Now they make wonderful timers on them). But when I started nursing school, I was a little stressed anyway, but in the middle of the night when I would roll over and the lights flickered from the TV, that didn't really wake me up but it prevented me from resting peacefully or going into the deep deep sleep that you need.
So.... that is just something to think about. In situations such as this, you have to use your own judgement.
Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.D.

answers from Nashville on

My daughter goes to sleep with the TV on too. I have her turn the volume down real low. I just turn it off when I go to bed. We leave the bathroom light on so that it is not completely dark for the children to see at night.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.S.

answers from Lexington on

children who sleep with the tv on, get much less sleep over all. the noise prevents them from getting into a good sleep pattern. i think the grandparents have it right, no tv in the bed room at all. if the tv was not an option, she would either sleep in the dark, or use the lamp.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.M.

answers from Raleigh on

I think someone mentioned the sound of the tv may be what she wants. You can try playing a cd as she goes to bed, this will eventually end, but will give her some noise to go to sleep to. And you can leave the lamp on with the cd playing.

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