Eeek 4 Year Old Son Asked About Babues!

Updated on January 07, 2011
J.M. asks from Harrisburg, PA
8 answers

So my 4 year old son just asked me how he got into my belly when he was a baby. I told him daddy put him in there through my belly button and he was only this big( pinched fingers together). Satisfied he walked away. Then he came back and asked me where daddy got him from. I told him to ask daddy. LOL but what can daddy tell him when he gets home tomorrow? I know he will remember and ask.

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answers from Tampa on

You should have just said that when Mommy and Daddy were really loving each other, you were created. You grew in my uterus which looks like it is in the belly, but really isn't.

No reason to give misinformation... and you can be as graphic or detailed as you feel comfortable. My 5 y/o knows she came from my uterus, but instead of coming out the vagina she came out of a cut in my lower belly. But she knows babies are supposed to come out of the Mommy's vagina.

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answers from Atlanta on

Be honest with him. You don't have to give him a graphic explanation of sexual intercourse, but tell him that when mommies and daddies love each other and hug and kiss sometime, then their love makes a baby grow in the mommy's tummy. Tell him the love is like a little seed in there that sprouts and grows into a baby. That's usually about all you need to say at this age. Worked for my 4 year old son!

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answers from Modesto on

Dad says "You were in my heart and I put you into moms".

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answers from Philadelphia on

I think you have received many great responses. I just want to throw another perspective in the pot.

Deal with it now, honestly and openly because before long you will be getting pointed questions from your child that will be much harder to answer.

My DD is in second grade and 8yrs old. She came home yesterday telling us how one of her little classmates said that she and her boyfriend had sex. My DD knew enough to say, "that isn't possible" and then talked with us(her dad & I) and we talked that if it were true that would be "bad touch" (the current school program) and that it would be physically and emotionally damaging for a child that young to have sex. We have talked with my DD and her little brother completely openly & honestly and sex, babies, vaginas, periods, and penises and testicles. She has a comfortable knowledge but was still confused when her classmate said this. Thankfully she spoke to us rather than trying to find answers on the school yard.

I am pretty progressive BUT I found it shocking that little second graders are talking about sex, and boyfriends, and girlfriends, etc. I didn't believe it when others told me it was getting younger and younger that these topics were entering the social scene but here is proof. And this isn't the first classmate discussion she has shared with us; talks of a boy classmate having 100 girlfriends and being a "chick magnet" and "playing the field"., a classmate saying that he "always cheats on his girlfriends" that's why he has so many, I mean for goodness sake, these are 7-8 yr olds. This talk didn't enter my conscience as a child until 12-13.

So please be honest now so your child isn't given incorrect or misdirected information that could open up a world of confusion or hurt later as he gets older. You don't have to pull out the Karma Sutra, just be as honest as you are comfortable even telling him that it makes you uncomfortable because...

ann m.

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answers from Boston on

When my daughter started to ask questions, I started to tell her the truth and she got grossed out and decided she didn't want to know anymore. As she got older and she would ask again, she would let me give her a little more info at a time and let me know when she had enough. It took about 5 years, but eventually she got what she needed and health class in our schools covered what she didn't want to hear come out of my mouth.

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answers from Stockton on

I remember the day my oldest came to me asking how to make a baby. I panicked b/c I was totally unprepared. As I was stammering trying to figure out what to say I noticed the pencil and paper he was holding. He wanted to know how to "draw" a baby! Phew!


answers from Rochester on

My 4 year old (he was about 3 1/2 when we got pregnant with #3) was actually really interested in the development and hasn't asked the "how's" quite so much. My doctor's office gave me a magazine that showed fetal development starting with the egg being fertilized and all those blobby/alien stages up to delivery (I tore the delivery pages out because they were TOO graphic even for me!). He loves to talk about how babies start out so small like a blob and grow bigger and bigger and bigger. I think I have kept it pretty vague and just tell him that sometimes mommies and daddies make a baby but the baby has to grow somewhere until he/she is big enough to be born, and that place is inside his mommy where he stays safe. I can't remember precisely what I have told him. He, however, has very courteously demonstrated how mommy is going to push the baby out while he is using the bathroom. Apparently I will be grunting and straining and then he tells me everyone he thinks will need to be there to help, including his caregiver. That probably wasn't helpful, but I would err on the side of giving him oversimplified information than downright wrong information.


answers from San Francisco on

LOL! My son has asked these questions too. We talked about how a baby grows in a mama's belly but when he asked how he got in my belly I told him it is really complicated to understand and we will talk about it when he gets older. I figure it's not a lie and it does not give him any information he can't handle at his age.

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