Dog or Not?

Updated on August 28, 2013
H.K. asks from Nescopeck, PA
12 answers

Hi moms,
Been trying to get a dog for my daughter. To be her best friend and to play with. I've called several places and seen different dogs. We found one that was great with her paid attention to her, they ran and played, dog gave kisses as did my daughter. I applied,didn't hear nothing. I asked friends that had adopted a dog from this place and they got their dog within a week and excellent communication. We seen the dog last Wednesday night and I asked if things went right could we have her by Sat. She said they would csll. No call so I called the women whose to be the supervisor and asked her about the application. this was Fri. she said it was up to the owmen who showed us the dog to call and call references. I talked to our friends on Sun. they emailed her about how thier dog was doing and said they would mention us. So Mon. she called my husband on cell she says the hold up was the Vet didn't check now I told her that we had nothing but a rabbit and didn't use a vet. My husband said same thing she responded okay no big deal I will check with references and hopefully see you sat.She never call references so I called supervisor again last night. I told her we needed a yes or no answer. My little girl doesn't want to go look at anything else she is waiting for them to call I told the machine I need to know if we are to forget about the dog or what am I to do with my child. The women picked up and said that her and the other had talked and the hold up was they had to be two other places on Sat and didn't know how they were to get here. I said okay my husband is home all day Wed. and I will take a vaction day anytime I need to. I said Wed would be great I could be here by 3-4 o'clock. She said they would see each other tonite and decide, still today they have not called the references. Is this some sort of game to tell me no without sayiong it or what? Please help if you can. Thanks in advance H.

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Featured Answers


answers from St. Louis on

It sounds like they already made up their mind they don't want to let you have the dog. Most people take the hint and stop calling back. I would imagine eventually they will outright tell you they don't think you are a good match for the dog.

7 moms found this helpful

More Answers


answers from New Orleans on

They are not giving you this dog.
Go to your local Humane Society if you want to adopt.

Also, take the rabbit to the Vet - even rabbits need check ups.

Dogs are meant to be a part of the family - the humans are meant to care for them. They are not meant to be a child's playmate. What happens when your daughter outgrows the dog? Or decides she doesn't want it anymore?

Who, in your family, is going to be responsible for the dog? You? Your Husband? Your daughter?

People who adopt out animals have to be very careful about who they give the animals to. They need to ensure that the animal will have the best possible care and not wind up abused or neglected or returned to the shelter. If you are declined, which seems likely at this point, you may want to ask them why you were declined. Then you will know what areas you need to improve before you get a dog.

9 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

Well, I'm going to take a leap...

I doubt they adopt out to a woman who leaves messages asking what she's supposed to do about her child. Also, rabbits need vet care. The fact that you don't have vet care for an animal in your home, is not good.

Have you considered the fact that no one is adopting to you, shows that you aren't a good match to own a dog...?

6 moms found this helpful


answers from Boston on

I think they may have decided you are not a good candidate. Did you tell them you want a dog to be your daughter's best friend and to play with her? That's not a good role for a dog and not a good reason to get one! Dogs (and other pets have to be subordinate to the humans and do not substitute for human companionship. Pets can add a lot to the family but you have to be prepared and have the right motivation. Dogs are particularly social, need to know their place, but need to have ONE home and not be adopted, given up, re-adopted, given up, etc. If this is a puppy you're talking about, it's going to grow up and have other needs. If it's an adult dog that needs to be put in a second home, it's already gone through rejection and adjustment, and that cannot happen a second time.

You have to show you are well aware of how to train a dog, care for it (and no, it's not going to be the child - it never is). You say that the dog paid attention to your daughter and so that was a good sign to you - but that may be another red flag for them, that you want the dog to do the work and not the humans do the work for the family.

If you don't have a vet lined up, they aren't going to release a dog to you. You already have a pet and have no veterinary care for it, so they may think you have no idea what's required for most animals in terms of health maintenance. You have to have a vet NOW and you have to ask exactly what this dog has already had in terms of shots and spay/neutering. If you haven't asked the right questions or showed real readiness other than WANTING the dog, that's not enough.

I think they may be stalling you while looking for a better, more prepared family. I think you should get some training information from the public library (DVDs or books) and really study them, learn about different breeds and what they require and what sort of family is best for each type, and then search for an animal you can manage. If you don't have experience as a dog owner, you need to get more education about the role dogs fill and don't fill, how to handle them, what to do when they are sick, what to do when you are at work and your child is at school. You mention that you work and your husband is home on Wednesdays. What's your plan for the dog during the other days? Do you think you can leave it in a crate for 8 hours? You just can't.

It's not enough to have good references that you are nice and well-meaning people. There are so many abandoned animals of all types that people got for the wrong reason and then couldn't handle or afford. The shelters are overflowing with unwanted animals who are stressed and lonely and bewildered.

I'm not seeing anything in your post that says you are really ready for a dog. Maybe you didn't share as much as you could have, but based on what you wrote, I can't see that any shelter, owner or breeder is going to sell a dog to you.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

They're just not that into you. Please find a different way to show your daughter that you love her.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on

a dog is not a child's best friend. That's NOT a reason to get a dog.

I don't know if it's a "game" they are playing or if they are hoping if they don't answer you - you will give up and go away. Maybe they don't want to tell you the truth and hurt your feelings.

If they haven't called your references? You aren't going to adopt the dog from this rescue.

Please, don't get a dog. You aren't ready for a dog. Find another animal to get. Your daughter will lose interest in the dog after a few months and the burden of caring for it will be squarely on your shoulders. With your health issues, your husband's 7 on an 7 off and you being gone all day. No. Not ready for a dog. Especially if the only reason you are getting a dog is to be your daughter's best friend.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

From reading your post ... you are not a good candidate. You do not even take your rabbit to the vet!

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Orlando on

Look elsewhere. It doesn't take that kind of run around if you are a good fit with the owner and dog.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from New London on

You have to take a dog very seriously !!! Plus, the bunny needs to go to the vet...

The lady I adopted my dog from was very choosy. She wanted to know if we had a fenced in pen, no kids under the age of 4, and that the dog would be walked on a leash when going on a casual walk.

I was happy that she chose her families wisely. We have had a coyote walk through our back yard, so the tall fence has been a blessing. Although, we never let the dog out of our site. We follow the leash rule, too.

Last summer, I caught a 7 lb dog roaming on my street w/ no leash.

They might be really considering other families...I had to wait a while, too.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Columbia on


I don't think that you should get your daughter a dog.

When you adopt an animal, you do so as a family. Because a dog isn't a "friend." It's an animal that requires time, money, training, and more training. 7 year old little girls are not trainers. And they do not tend to have the ability to teach a dog who is alpha and who isn't in the house "pack" structure.

I suggest you go to the library and check out and read the book "Good Dogs, Great Owners." This is an excellent resource on what it takes to properly train a dog to know their role in a family.

I think you're about to get in way over your head and you should reconsider.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

No dog...too much drama.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Allentown on

As others have said, I suspect they think you are not a good fit for a dog. I love dogs, grew up with a dog, but will never own one myself. Growing up with one, I know the exorbitant amount of work and time needed for a dog. I have cats, because I know my limitations with time. I would reconsider getting a dog. Especially a puppy, who really should have someone home to train them the first few weeks. I would probably recommend a lower maintenance pet.

1 mom found this helpful
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