Does Anyone Have a Child That Is Bullied?

With my dd, I find that a lot of "bullying" (if you want to call it that) happens under the radar. Girls say things out of earshot of adults...or it happens on the bus when there is little supervision.

I think all kids go through some of this and it's hard to draw the line between misbehavior and bullying. My dd did have a problem with one girl in 3rd grade and I specifically asked that this girl NOT be in the same class in 4th grade.

There were two other neighbor girls who were mean to my dd on the bus...so we quit riding the bus (it also gives us extra time).

My point is, the most effective way to stop it is to remove the child from the situation or notify an adult or teacher so they can keep a distance between the kids.

Our school takes bullying seriously. Kids can and are often mean to each other (teasing, name calling, etc.) and it's up to the parents and school to teach them and correct them as necessary. True bullying happens when a child or children continues to target a specific child or children even after being corrected. THAT is when more drastic measures need to be taken, including bringing in the parents of ALL involved.
I would hope that if these kids are found guilty of real bullying they get sent to the office and suspended if necessary. The parents can be in denial all they want but the school ultimately has the power and responsibility to protect their students.

My older son was being bullied by some of the grade three boys when he was in grade two. Our school, using the restitution method, dealt with the kids and the bullying stopped before any of the parents even needed to be notified. Restitution really works.

My kids fortunately haven't been bullied, but I was as a child. It's a rare moment when a parent takes responsibility for a bully's behavior. My family moved out of our city to a better school district to get me away from my bullies.

It takes a special teacher or guidance counselor to put an end to bullying. I was not bullied as a kid, but my favorite, great niece is. She is overweight and intellectually slow. I am not at her school but I see her in so many of my students. I hope that the karma I do in including them will spill to her at her school.

It's not worth your child's esteem to have them suffer through it. If you can, home school, change classes, volunteer at the school, or change schools.

Bullying does not end with students. Even mamas here gang up on others rather than handling their individual disagreements.

Years ago, this was all part of growing up. Kids teased each other, picked on each other and they worked things out THEMSELVES! Now everything is considered bullying. Let them be kids and figure it out themselves.

When did we become a society where everyone has to be nice to each other? That's not the real world.

I'm sorry if her kids are being really bullied. As in...a group singles out the one kid and routinely keeps harassing him/her everywhere. That's bullying.
And somewhere along the line, we stopped teaching our kids how to defend themselves in that scenario. We put the responsibility on other people to come to their rescue. To issue punishment. I'm obviously speaking in generalities, but "bullying" has a pretty broad definition these days, and it basically boils down to 'anyone that isn't nice to my kid'.

Again... the real world doesn't work that way.

The question then becomes does the school believe your child (sounds like they did or they would not have contacted the parents, although you do not say who did the contacting.) If the school believes your child it is up to them to handle it. Your job is to help prepare your child for the real world in which people will not always be nice. If your child is consistently targeted the school needs to step in, if it is only occasionally the school may not be able to see it to handle it. Support in handling an unjust world is your job. It is not easy but help them see who they are and that how they react is key. If they don't get what they want bullies often move on to more interesting targets - then you have a child who learns how to stand up for others - which oddly is often easier.