Do You Have a Holiday Tradition That You Want to Leave Behind?

Updated on December 27, 2011
L._. asks from Lakeside, CA
5 answers

Being treated like crud by at least one or more of my daycare parents. That's mine. I came so very close to making it past the holiday without losing a huge chunk of income. It always happens. Every year, it's the same. This is my 26th Christmas. Nothing has changed.

I have a family with 4 kids, 2 I take to school, and 2 I keep during the day. They sent them to Grandmas last week, paying for last week on the way out the door. That's cool. I had hope. But we are a day past the new week and they are a no call, no pay, no show. Last week the oldest girl told me that they had tons and tons of gifts under the tree. She was rather mesmerized by all that they had bought.

Now I have utilities to pay and food to buy and my final van payment to scrape together with a full 800 per month missing until I get them replaced.

God is good, and I will likely have them replaced before I ever lose a full month. But sometimes, it takes months to replace someone completely. Often, I never find a situation that fills the bill and everything gets re-organized.

It's so sad. I love the Lord and to me that's truly what Christmas is supposed to be about. But instead, I spend the whole month just trying not to have anxiety at a situation that has proven to be true EVERY SINGLE YEAR.

Is anyone else ready to kiss this year goodbye, take down the decorations and hopefully, not think about Chrstmas for a long, long time?

I really do have some awesome families. If utilities and food were not so high, I'd be able to sluff it off easier.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

I charge in advance. So I am never out of what's owed for last week. BUT, there's no way to get this week filled since we are a day in and the next few weeks until I replace them.

Most people think it's money owed to us for time spent caring for the kids. That's not the caset at all. It's a notice that we can contract for. But I refuse to force people to pay for time they are obviously gone. It's times like that when people get angry and accuse providers falsley of all kinds of things. It's never happened to me in all these years. But I believe it's because I know when to just cut ties. I have friends on the business that have detailed contracts. Then they take people to court or send them to collection. Suddenly CPS is on their door and they are shut down over something that never happened.

I will check out Dave Ramsey some day. I have been stubborn because I already know that it seems like he puts way too much emphasis on what we can do. That old saying about God helping those that help themselves is unscriptural. If I had one wish about myself, it would be that I never take any care what-so-ever about anything in my life. So long as I get up everyday and love people, pray, and love God most, the rest is his to administer. Just based soley on what I hear so many others say about Dave Ramsey, it seems like he puts a lot of emphasis on us digging out of our own hole. If we could do that in any area of our lives, Christ would not have needed to suffer and die in our place.

BUT...yes, I need savings. I absolutely intend on taking care of that over the next year. I have a plan, Lord willing.

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

So they've just left your services without telling you? I'm sorry. I'm assuming you have a contract so can you enforce it for at least a little money owed if they didn't give you notice?

What I want to get rid of is the split Christmas Day. It's partially b/c SS's birthday is also Christmas,but it means they never come to my side's celebration and when they leave is stupidly determined by their mom and DH goes along with it. One is a young adult now and if he's old enough to go to his GF's family's place on a plane 2 days after Christmas, he's old enough to not have to see everyone on Christmas Day. We split Thanksgiving (EOY) and they always do Easter with their mom. I'd like a more fair shake. It feels like they're here for the good stuff and then off and we're left with the mess. And DD misses them, too.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I think the number one, most stressful thing about Christmas for nearly all of us is our own expectations. Somehow or other we have it in our heads that, of all the times in the whole year, this ought to be the happiest and easiest. And it never is, of course. Sometimes it's just difficult enough to tempt one to become superstitious about that date on the calendar.

It isn't Christmas's fault that the family defaulted on you. It's the people's. And I imagine that it is because they think about you the way they think about the milkman, the postman, the trash collectors, the kids' teachers, the cashier at the grocery store - handy and useful, but not anyone actually to think of as a real person with utilities to pay for and personal situations to deal with.

You're right on what Christmas is about, and you know what is in the Book about your needs being supplied. Once that spot in your list is filled, you may be able to look at this whole thing differently. I hope so.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'd just like to go to someone else's house for a change for both Christmas and Thanksgiving. It's gotten to be too much work and not fun. Am I a grump? No, but I work 50 hour weeks and commute. A little less work would make the holidays happier for me.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.T.

answers from Little Rock on

Just a suggestion....Have you called your utility company and asked for an extension? I know a lot of companies will let you split up bills and so forth if you need the extra help.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

This has been a rough year. Lots of sickness in our families and O. VERY sick friend. So, yes, I'm ready for January first, for sure!

(And as for the unstable income aspect of your day care business, have you ever considered reading up on, and implementing some Dave Ramsay principles that outline, in great detail, how to plan for emergencies and handle fluctuating monthly income? You'll like it, it's bible-based and, as we know, God helps those that help themselves, right?! Pick up a used copy of Financial Peace or Total Money Makeover or get O. at the library so you can read it free or nearly for free!)

1 mom found this helpful
For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions