Dilemma, Long Question, Need Advice Moms!

Updated on April 09, 2011
L.M. asks from Hicksville, NY
16 answers

OK, I am 35 weeks pregnant and will be going on maternity leave May 1st. I currently work 3 days per week and have a nanny for my 2 children, 3 1/2 and 4 1/2. While on maternity leave, I cannot afford to pay my nanny, as I will not be being paid by my employer. I am planning to be off of work from May 1 - September 6th. I have been for the past couple of weeks trying to find a summer job for our nanny. I talked to her about this a week ago and let her know what was happening and that I was working on it. She needs the income and does not have anything else lined up so far. Well, long story short, it has been ALOT harder than I thought and I have been on many websites posting ads up for her including some I was recommended to on this site. So I am facing this problem now of what should I do. Should I try and find her another permanent nanny job (there are lots of those out there) and then be stuck with a big problem myself come September? Or should I do my best and tell her she also needs to try and find something, and if I can't then too bad, I did my best? I feel so bad and so stressed out about this!! Thanks for your advice moms.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Thanks everyone for all the responses, I really appreciate it. I do agree she needs to work on this herself too. I was hoping to find a solution for her so I could avoid the situation of losing her as a nanny. We really love her and she has been with us for 4 years. I hate the idea of finding someone else...
To the mom who said quit my job, right now unfortunately I absolutely cannot afford not to work. I work part time - 3 days a week 8:45 - 4:30 and I make good money for the hours I work. We are hoping within a year or so I will not have to work but for anyone living in the NY area you will understand how expensive housing is. And we couldn't move somewhere if we wanted to - we owe more on our house than it is worth.

Featured Answers

S.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I think that you need to just tell her to find something else and then find a new nanny in the fall. You are taking a long time off and summer jobs won't even start for 2 more months. It's hard for you both I know. But it's part of the job.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.Y.

answers from New York on

She can look into day camps and the parks and recreation department. those were summer jobs I had as a college student on LI. I worked at girls scout camp for several years (but they start hiring in Jan and are done by now for sleep away camp). I don't know about their day camp. My sister worked at the North Shore Science Museum day camp but there are so many day camps around.

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.C.

answers from Houston on

I would say you are going out on a limb for her and I think she should understand your situation. You have given her enough notice...let her find something else to do, and if she doesn't come back...then that is beyond your control. Why should you be stressing??? That's what I can't figure!

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

Summer camp counselor? Seems perfect fit for your situation. She'll be gainfully employed for the summer, it's temporary, and seems to coincide with your needs. Plus, she obviously has an aptitude for children.

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.C.

answers from Milwaukee on

While I think it's really nice of you to try and help her find another job, I also think it's not your job. You can give her a glowing referral, but I don't get why you are working so hard to find her a job. Maybe I'm missing something here.....

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.U.

answers from Detroit on

It's really nice of you to try to help her out, but it's not really your responsibility - I mean, if I was being laid off by my employer, given reasonable notice, it would still be my responsibility to find a new job, not theirs.

My only other thought was you might not need her full-time while you are on maternity leave, but could you still have her come maybe one day once or twice a week just to help out and give you a break? She could still get paid (if you can afford it) for her time, and still have the rest of the time to find a temporary part-time job.

3 moms found this helpful

C.W.

answers from Las Vegas on

It is sweet that your helping your nanny, but in my opinion your only responsibility is to give her a heads up that she won't have work which you've done. You have helped her tremendously and that is that. If she can't post ads up herself than she is kind of lazy. I don't understand why your doing her work for her. You told her what to expect and that is your only responsibility. If she's not telling you this herself I would wonder if she's walking on you, because as a professional I would never let someone look for a job for me. Tell her she won't have work (in a more professional way obviously) from May to September and she needs to find some other work. The End. I have this itch that I should suggest getting a new nanny just because with this aspect she sounds lazy or something but I don't know the whole story. 4 months is a long time so you probably will have to find a new nanny.
I just feel I have to ask, do your children seem to like her?

2 moms found this helpful

P.M.

answers from Tampa on

She should definitely be looking too!! She hasn't been? She may need a non-childcare related summer job while waiting to come back for your family - that is if that was the plan? Summer time hires a lot of cashiers, stockers, baggers, etc... not sure of her age - but if she's looking everywhere - knowing it's temporary - she'll find something!

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.S.

answers from Chicago on

Are you planning to go back to work in the fall and wanting to save her as your nanny? I would jsut tell her that your going to be off work and you will be sorry to not have her but she will need to find something else for the summer. Good nannys are in high demand. She should be looking for another job either as another poster said as a fill in or as a permanent job and you will have to find another nanny. Either way the job of finding her a new job should not fall totally on your shoulders. good luck

2 moms found this helpful

B.&.

answers from Peoria on

i dont understand why u are so worried and stressing about finding her a job it is very thoughtful of you but u have other things to deal with u are having a baby very soon :) well if she cant help u in ur time of need witch is understandable to a certain extent everyone needs income then im sure she is very capable in finding another job herself its not your responsiblity :) im sure she will manage just fine. and you should b more considered about finding someone else to help you maybe a family member :) good luck and congrats in advance :)

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.S.

answers from Chicago on

I think she should look for a new job. Even if she gets a nanny job, most run from mid June to end of Aug. (summer vacation). She would still be out of a job all of May, half of June and possibly half of Aug. I think that is asking a lot. I run a home daycare. If one of my parents take more than a 12 week maternity leave, I tell them that I can not hold a spot. Four months is a long time to expect someone to wait for a job.

1 mom found this helpful

K.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

Are there any summer camps in the area? If she likes kids that could be something else to look into. Often camps look for young adults to keep up with the kids, so it depends on the age of your nanny, but she might be able to find something.

How about at local schools, not sure if you could post anything but there has to be a family out there looking for daycare/nanny just for the summer if both parents work and the kids are out of school.

In the end she has to be finding a job. It is great that you are trying to help, hopefully she can find something. If you only have her 3 days a week she must have something else if living is costly so she needs to figure this out.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.V.

answers from New York on

Why is she incapable of finding herself another position? I mean, I get that you're trying to help, but it's not really your responsibility to find her a summer job in the hopes that she'll come back to you in September, is it?

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.J.

answers from Albany on

Did you pay into employment insurance for her? Can you not lay her off and then she could collect employment insurance? Are you going to give this lady some notice? Is she a live in nanny? What does your husband say?

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

I second summer camp, is there a YMCA around you or a local school that does .

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.N.

answers from Fayetteville on

You should quit work and stay at home. It's awesome. And I guarantee you CAN afford it. :)

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions