Did You Write a Birth Plan, What Did You Include and Was It Followed?

Updated on March 30, 2011
E.R. asks from Corona, CA
39 answers

I am in the process of writing my birth plan. Just out of curiousity I would like to know if you wrote one, what did you include in it and if it was followed through. I will be giving birth in a hospital any day now and would like to know how thorough they can be when following a woman's wishes for the birth of her child. Any pointers/advice is greatly appreciated! Thank you!

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A.H.

answers from Washington DC on

I didn't write one. Didn't even know what a birthplan was. Had my daughter, she was perfect. A friend of mine wrote one, oi, 9 pages going on 10. Wanna know what happend?!? Her water broke at Target, the baby crowned in the Ambulance and they barely made it up the elevator for the baby to be born. The blessed birthplan was at home on the desk ( it might still be there since no one ever mentioned that thing ever again...).

4 moms found this helpful

L.F.

answers from Dallas on

Just my opinion: hospitals deliver babies every day so I didn't feel the need to tell them what to do. The hospital where I had my DD was wonderful. They listened to my needs regarding pain management and breastfeeding and were extremely supportive every step of the way. If you have a choice of hospital, ask around and find out where people had a good experience.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

I did, for my first. Then, I did not WANT to follow it. I had no idea what I would feel like, or what would happen. I was not disapointed by not following the plan...I had two more and did not bother. They were all wonderful births, and with no plan, nothining happened that was not "according."

M.

3 moms found this helpful

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N.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I didn't write a birth plan because one thing I learned from others and from my own births is "When it comes to birthing a baby, things RARELY go as planned". My first child I wanted an epi but the labor hit me out of the blue and by the time I got to the hospital they were telling me to push. The second baby I didn't want an epi but after a day of induced labor and exaustion I screamed for one. Save yourself the trouble and just have one thing in mind ... an open mind.

You may plan to not take any drugs but after you get into full labor scream for them. You may want the baby in the room with you at night, but have a long labor and decide to have the nurses care for them so you can sleep.

The nurse at the birth of my second asked if I had a plan and I said no, I was just going to be open and deal with things as they come. She laughed and said that's the best attitude to have. So many women are dead set of having a plan and when it doesn't go as planned, they stress.

All you really need is to have someone in your family know what to do in case of an emergency.

10 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

Here was my birth plan:

"Hello Nurse ___. I have delivered 0 children and you have delivered hundreds, if not thousands. Clearly you have the expertise here. I will follow your advice but be a good coach so we both can have the best outcome. I ABSOLUTELY DO WANT pain meds whenever you and my doctor think the time is right to give them. Also, given my personality, I need a drill sergeant approach to birthing or we will be here all day pushing and neither of us want that."

Yes, you will tell your doctor your birth plan but it is more important to let the NURSES know your intentions because they will be spending the majority of the time with you.

The best thing to do is to have an open mind and be flexible. At the end you want a healthy baby and mother and that might differ from your 'dream birth'. And don't let people scare you that hospital births are this awful experience where doctors want to just gut you so they can make their tee time; for every bad experience there are so many more great ones!

No one gets a prize for birthing the baby in a 'better' way, so don't make it your first MOMpetition! Be as comfortable and as open-minded as possible.

Oh...and the woman who said that pushing out the baby was like pooping was SO right! Seriously, push it out like you're taking the biggest dump on the table. And, if you do poop the table do not worry or be embarrassed because the doctors and nurses have seen it all before and will not be mortified that you did it.

7 moms found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from Topeka on

My oldest...who is a lawyer...wrote out a birthplan that read like a legal document for one of the most complicated lawsuits in the world!! It must have been at least 10 pages long...I was secretly amused by the whole thing. My 2nd daughter modeled HER birth plan after her sisters' and I don't know if the birthplan ever made it out of the suitcase and into public view!!! (She gave birth 70 minutes after checking into the hospital).
I think a birth plan is a good idea but I would tell you to keep it simple...don't come up with every scenario that is possible. This would be MY birth plan
I want to be able to be up and moving around as much as I want and as long as possible
I do not want you to offer me pain medications..if I want them I will ASK for them
I only want my husband in the labor and delivery room with me and I do not want anyone else to come in with us until we have had our bonding time with the baby.
Unless the baby is in distress I want to have the baby with me and allowed to nurse immediately...the bath and footprints can wait.
If my child is a boy I do NOT want to circumcise him, please do not offer to do so.
I want the baby to spend as much time with me, in my room as possible, I do not want him/her to be kept in the nursery unless I ask .

Everything else is probably outside of your control anyway...you just need to let your doctor/midwife know ahead of time what kind of birth experience that you want to have. And as someone has already said...you will be spending more time with the nursing staff than the doctor or midwife...so they are really the ones who need to see the birthplan. That is why I say to keep it short...they don't have time to read a 10 page legal document while they are trying to get you settled in and ready to have a baby!!
Good luck to you and congratulations!!

6 moms found this helpful

C.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Here's my advice to you, after the successful births of my two precious girls. Forget the plan, and just go into it with an open mind. The problem with coming up with a plan is that none of us REALLY knows what will happen with any particular labor and delivery. And even if we knew what would happen and when, we still don't know how we'll feel about it at the time. Just make sure your husband (mom, doula, etc) knows what your wishes are, in the event you're not feeling very articulate when you're in labor. But ultimately, give your doctor and nurses room to do what they do best, and don't plan so much that you feel disappointed that things didn't go how you wanted. The important thing is not that a plan is followed, but rather than you come home afterward healthy and carrying your little bundle of joy! Congratulations and good luck!!

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J.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

If I had known then what I have known for the past 10 years, at the top of the list would have been NO Hep B shot to my brand new baby. Babies should not need a shot for a disease, of which I did not have, that is transferred through sex, drugs, transfer of blood.

Start with The Vaccine Book by Dr. Robert Sears.

Congratulations on the upcoming birth of your wonderful miracle :o)

3 moms found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

There are websites that will help you write a birth plan.

I wrote one using several different websites. I went over it with my doctor a few weeks prior to my due date.

Then when I went into labor, my hospital was full so I was diverted to a different hospital where I didn't know ANYONE. The doctor didn't give a flying foofoo about my wishes, but the nurses really tried to make sure everything was like I wanted it to be. It was a waste though because once I was in the moment I didn't want anything to be like I thought I would want it.

My birth plan included no drugs or iv/heplock. Once I hit 7-8, I asked for drugs and got them administered by IV.

In my birth plan, I wanted a mirror at the end of the bed so I could see the birth... I wuoldn't open my eyes.

In my birth plan, I wanted to switch positions and try to push in the squatting position and touch the head as it crowned... I physically couldn't move because the drugs didn't work that late in the game.

I recommend having your wishes written down so that if everything goes right, you enjoy every bit of the experience... But keep an open mind and know that things might not go like you want them to go, and that's okay... As long as you get a healthy baby in the end.

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M.L.

answers from Bellingham on

I did not write one. I'm more of a go with the flow kinda gal, and everything went perfectly. I think if u have too much of a specific plan, and it doesn't go as u wished, u could be disappointed... Congrats on your new bundle!!!

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L.P.

answers from Pittsfield on

I think the most important thing is to NOT get too attatched to an idea of what you want everything to be like. Sometimes women get so hung up on how they want the birth to be, and are very disappointed if they need a C-section or something. My friend was really looking forward to the moment when they would put the baby on her chest. The birth went fine, but the baby had to be whisked away because of a breathing issue (baby was fine) and she hadn't even seen the baby. She was so disappointed and upset that the baby saw like 12 people before she saw her own mother. If your only focus is a healthy baby, you'll be happier.
My only other advice is don't put no pain meds in your birth plan- even if that is what you want. Keep your options open. They won't give you anything unless you ask for it anyway. I know of someone who was determined to go "natural" and put in her birth plan very clearly that she did not want pain meds. Her labor turned out to be a whole lot more painful than she thought it would be, but when she asked for an epi, they didn't want to give her one.

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A.A.

answers from Columbus on

Hi Elena,

I wrote a birth plan of sorts - my general preferences (breasfeeding, epidural, etc) and it went in my file. I'm not sure if anyone ever looked at it but to be completely honest, it didn't matter. I had a a midwife assigned to me that I had never met before and I was a basketcase about the imminent birth. So afraid of the pain, the unknown etc. Absolutely freaking out. So we worked together and she calmed me down and got me an epidural ASAP and talked me through my whole labour.

Looking back now, it's my opinion that birth plans are mostly a first time mom thing. And I don't mean that in a bad way. I think we plan (myself included!) because we have no idea what to expect and writing it down makes us feel a little more in control. Well, for my anyways! I imagine that the experienced widwives and doctors are just humouring us when they read through our birth plans, because when it's time they will just get in there and do what needs to be done for our health and safety.

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M.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I wrote a birth plan (I think I read an example on Baby Center or another similar website) and while I found the process of writing it valuable, I didn't follow it at all in the end. If you're a planner and it helps to know your options, I think it's a great idea, but for me it was more important to be open and okay with changes as needed.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

I didn't write one. I talked with my Dr a few weeks before my due date. I wanted an epidural. I said it would be nice not to have a C-section and it would be nice not to have an episiotomy, but the goal here is to have as healthy a baby as we can and if any emergency comes up - do what you've got to do.
I had the epidural - it was flawless.
I'd been in labor for 16 hrs already and it was such a relief I wanted to kiss the anesthesiologist.
I delivered vaginally after 36 hrs of labor (my son was 9 lbs 1.5 oz). I had an episiotomy but it was the least cutting possible.
I'm very happy with the way it all turned out.

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K.P.

answers from Seattle on

I had a midwife, and they were really nice. They did everything that I had wanted.
When I went in for a tour of the labor and delivery ward of the hospital they gave me a sheet of paper with options of what I wanted.

I put on there, that I had no previous children, and that I wanted my husband and mother in the room.
That I wanted the lights to be dimmed, and the room to be quiet.
I also wanted the epidural, and not a C-section unless absolutely necessary. I wanted to wait it out and let nature take its course with my son and everything worked out great. I also had a mirror at the end of the bed so I could see him being born. Most amazing thing I have seen, and pretty cool experience.

You just have to go in there positive, and but to be flexible too. Things happen, and at the end of the day you want you, and your son to be healthy and happy :) The doctor's and nurses will do their best to follow what you want done, but they will ultimately do what they feel is best for you and child, so again be flexible on your wishes.

Think about what you absolutely want and what you dont, and let the doctor and nurse know, and go with the flow.

Everything will be great, and soon you wont remember what you did or didnt want, or if things went your way or not. All you will be thinking about is that beautiful little bundle of joy in your arms and how you never knew you could love something so much.

Good luck! :)

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T.B.

answers from Washington DC on

I did write a birth plan for both of my girls. I included the very important fact that I wanted to nurse my babies so they knew if something went wrong and I had to be put under NOT to give my babies a bottle unless absolutely necessary. I wanted an epi for both...but alas both my girls came early and I hadn't transitioned from my blood thinners yet so wasn't allowed epi with either birth. My first was a 56 hour labor and believe me I was very glad I had documented my wishes for everything so that I didn't have to answer all of the same questions repeatedly with each nurse that entered my room. By the end of it I was just so very exhausted I just wanted my baby to be born healthy and it to be over with. I had no energy left for pleasantries. My 2nd was not nearly as long of a labor but still so intense I could barely speak let alone answer a ton of questions. Having the birth plan in place allowed each nurse that entered the room to take a quick glance and see exactly what I wanted/needed without a barrage of questions. Everyone has their ideal plan of how the birth should go but it will NOT go exactly as planned and that's ok but it does help the nurses and doctors know what you need/want.

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D.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think a birth plan is a great thing when it is written with flexibility. Let me give an example. Parenting is similar to a birth plan, in my opinion, as parents, we have all of these plans for our children before they are born. When we get the child, we have to incorporate our plans with their personality and together we work to get them to adulthood.
I really feel that as mothers we can already tell somethings about our child. I have three, each has a different personality. My two older ones were very active when I was pregnant. My youngest slept most of the time and had me in the hospital twice to make sure he was alive.
When they came out, their personalities were the same as in the tummy. The two oldest were very active and on the go, the youngest is laid back. I have to work with who they are to get them to live their best life, the same with the birth plan.
It's always good to have a plan, any good parent would. However, it is always good to be flexible as a parent and listen to the child, because that's what the medical field is going to do. They listen to your baby, it may look like they are looking at scribble on a paper and listening to a galloping horse, but they are listening to your baby. They are trained in baby talk and they know when the baby say's "I'm having a problem, could you take the pressure off my cord, so I can breathe! They can interpret when the baby says, ok, I tried coming out that way and my head is getting swollen,"I am getting tired. "Can we stop this?" It takes years of training and experience to get to know the other little invisible patient that can only be seen (on paper) and heard. I call it paper talk or paper assessment.
As in communication with anyone, they may misinterpret something, just like when your child wants to go somewhere that you think may not be good and you refuse. As parents we make decisions based on a lot of factors, we may not always be right, but we make our decisions based on the knowledge and experience we have at the moment. We may change our opinions in hind sight but we have to what is best when the situation arises. So, it is with the labor and delivery team. They work as a team with you to help you reach your goals. They use experience to guide you towards your goal and they only change it if the youngest team player (the baby) tells them differently.
So, I say by all means, make a plan, just be flexible if decisions are brought to you that are in the best interest of you and your baby. Trust the team that you work with, their goal is the same as yours, the birth experience you want and a happy healthy delivery! Congratulations!

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I.G.

answers from Seattle on

I worked with a midwife and we wrote my birthplan together, with her reminding me of a few things I would have otherwise forgotten.
I gave birth at a hospital, but wanted to labor at home - so I requested to be released after receiving a dose of antibiotics for GBS (not a problem).
I requested no unnecessary vaginal checks (I only had two).
I wanted my baby to be given to me right away and for the cord not to be cut until it stopped pulsing, all of which was accommodated, I even cut the cord myself and the baby was examined while I held her.
I asked to be released without an overnight stay - and again, no one gave us any trouble about it.
Those were the big ticket items, I had a bunch more and felt that all points of my birthplan were honored.

I chose the hospital very carefully, had a very supportive midwife and it was a great experience for me. Having a well thought out birth plan was great because both my midwife and the nurses knew what we wanted in advance (my birth plan was sent ahead about 4 weeks before my due date) and they where happy to help us have a good experience.

Of course it depends on where you have your baby, some hospitals apparently can't be bothered to consider patient wishes - personally I would stay far far away from those places.

Congrats and good luck!

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E.D.

answers from Seattle on

To me, a birth plans purpose is not to map out how your baby comes into the world (i.e I will give birth at 4:37pm, on my bed, in the Lithotomy position), but how you wish others to support you while your baby comes into the world (i.e I wish to be mobile if it gives me comfort to do so. I do not want the umbilical cord to be cut for X amount of time. I do not want to receive pain medication/would like to receive an epidural as soon as possible. I want X to accompany me in the case of C-section. I do not wish to have visitors until X/I want visitors as soon as possible. Withstanding complications, I want to hold my child immediately after birth. Etc.)

My midwives suggested I write a birth plan and, though initially reluctant, I did so. I am very grateful I wrote out a "plan", because I gained a great deal of clarity and confidence *while* writing it out.

It gave me a chance to advocate for myself, and I was able to look at what I was afraid of, what I was excited about and what I hoped for. Additionally, I was able to create a mental map for "worst case scenarios" which gave me the ability to let go of my fear and trust the process.

My midwives gave me phenomenal care prior to labor and getting ready (emotionally and physically) for labor was a part of that care. I thought that writing a birth plan was redundant and bureaucratic. I ended up loving the process and am very glad to have done it.

My birth plan ended up being four pages long. A page of that was simply written and dedicated to my wishes should I need to be admitted to the hospital and/or have a c-sections. The rest was a lot more touchy-feely and personal.

I so not think of a birth plan as being fixed or ridged. Rather, I believe it is an opportunity to empower ourselves, give voice to our preferences, create room for and prepare for contingencies and generally trust the process of birth. IMHO, a woman does not need to have the "perfect/dream birth" to have a good experience. She DOES become empowered through being heard and respected.

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A.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'm a doula and I believe birth preference lists or letters are very important. It helps a mom convey the atmosphere in which she would like to birth. Its very important to keep it short, no longer than a page. Give your team an idea of how you feel about pain management (most of my clients want absolutely no pain medication or other interventions, and I help them achieve that goal), interventions such as pitocin augmentation, breaking the bag of waters, IVs, immediate or delayed cord clamping, breastfeeding, skin to skin time immediately, rooming in, delay of newborn procedures, etc. A lot of the plan will be about after birth care.
One way of not writing an elaborate letter is to state clearly: "please speak to me and my partner about everything you wish to do to, for or about me and my child before doing it so I can make an informed decision regarding our care." And ask questions or prepare your partner to ask questions.
If your partner has any chance of being nervous or scared about you being in pain or discomfort, GET A DOULA. If you want to be extremely comfortable and not worry about his ability, GET A DOULA. If you want to be sure of the care you get... I repeat myself too much!

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P.M.

answers from Tampa on

I have yet to hear of a hospital or OB following a woman's birth plan and have heard it being so bad for many Moms - that they felt they weren't listened to, coerced into choices they would not have made and brow beaten to accept medications and epidurals. There have even Mothers who've said they were given episiotomies without consent, breaking membranes without consent, etc.

You want a birth plan discussed, embraced and allows room for changes - go to a Midwife!

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I've had a birth plan for each of my three children. First one was about not having any medication for pain, and to break my water if progress stalled. I presented it hand-written on notebook paper, in pencil. Folded about eight times. It was given about as much consideration as any high school student's wishes on important topics they are unqualified to really know about. I was 22 and married. Ended up with two epidurals and pitocin

Second was not to offer pain meds; I would ask for them. Lots of walking and changing positions and to break my water if I stalled out. No vaccinations or prophylactic treatments for diseases I don't have once the baby was born. My nurse really got it. Helped a LOT that I typed it up and printed out copies so anyone who needed it could have one. When I stalled at 8+, she really helped me to work through it. When I requested pain meds, she took her time telling us about an option, flipping me to another position and leaving to let us think about what we wanted to do. Anesthesiologist arrived just as I was complete. It was exactly the birth I wanted.

Last time my birth plan was very similar, except I added that I didn't want anyone counting during delivery. My water had already broken and the progress was really slow. Ended up on pitocin without pain meds. Couldn't walk around, except to the bathroom, because she was still up too high. Nurse would walk in and ask, "You ready to push yet?" I had to remind her I didn't want any counting during pushing. It was the worst of my labors. Some of it was just the circumstances. Some, obviously, was the nurse. The nurse, in the long run, was a minor annoyance.

One thing I've heard about birth plans is the longer and more detailed it is, the less likely it is to happen.

My advice: Clarify what's *really* important, present your wishes clearly, have copies for everyone (I took five and came home with one each time) and understand that you may or may not have everything happen according to your wishes. Ultimately, it's a wish list, not something you can guarantee.

Best wishes for the labor and delivery of your dreams and a healthy baby to snuggle after it's all said and done.

:+)

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R.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

Please remember the old saying, "People make plans and God laughs". Make your plan, talk it through with your partner and doctor and then "Let go, and let God". Even if you are not a spiritual person, understanding that this is all not "in your control" will actually really help you be able to go with the flow. One thing about births is you think and want it to go the way you envision it and it rarely/never happens just that way.

Says the person who's baby didn't wait to get to the hospital.

May things go smoothly and may your heart fill until it feels like it will explode with love for your new miracle.

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C.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

My plan wasn't followed. i was ok w/ that. Nothing went "normal". Turns out, after 3 kids, I finally have verification-i labor weird. after hrs of being at 9cmm. given pitocin and epidural, kids come out. and they are healthy. All i care about is the end result.

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S.K.

answers from Chicago on

I did not have to write out a birth plan, my midwife and I discussed my preferences throughout my pregnancies. She knew I desired a low intervention water birth, it was very helpful that her view of labor/delivery was very similar to mine. I do recommend putting your wishes down on paper, and it would be ideal if you had a chance to discuss them with your doctor/midwife before labor begins. Your birth plan will be more well received if it is presented as your preferences rather than demands. Also, let them know that you are fully aware of the possibility that your wishes may not be followed if complications arise for you or your baby. If you desire to be active, eat, etc during early and/or active labor, try to find out the typical polocies/procedures at your hospital and for your doctor/midwife. It is generally best to stay home at least through early labor, but talk to your provider to make sure this is okay, there are some situations when it is advised you be at the hospital sooner. The extent to which your nurses and other care providers follow your plan will depend a lot on the hospital, the individual person's attitude/biases toward what you desire, your attitude, your support people and their willingness to advocate for you when you are vulnerable, the status of you/your baby and your labor, and many, many other factors. As I said before, discussing this with your provider AHEAD of time, if possible, is crucial. That will keep him/her from feeling ambushed with "demands" from a "lay" person as soon as you walk in. It is possible to make your providers feel threatened like that and then they are much less likely to work with you to achieve your goals. Also, if something you desire is simply not possible for some reason, you will know ahead of time and feel less like your plan is being ignored. Or maybe you and your provider can work out some compromises on any issues you have differences of opinion about.
I wish you the best of luck on your upcoming delivery.

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

I agree with the posters below. You should be talking to your OB throughout the pregnancy about what you think you might like, and his/her opinion. At each visit I asked questions: drugs? Water breaking early? Rooming in? Etc. But when the moment comes, no one is going to take the time to read off even a 1 page thing. I do know a couple of hospital-birthing moms who wrote a birth plan but then never used it. They didn't feel that their wishes were ignored, but understood that's kind of what happens when you have a hospital birth.

Be willing to advocate for yourself, get your partner on the same page as you, and ASK QUESTIONS. Before labor gets too hard and heavy, make clear to your nurse/doctor that you don't want them to do ANYTHING to you without explaining what it is and why they're doing it. If you request this clearly and calmly, I've found that almost every medical professional I've ever worked with has been willing to oblige. It doesn't mean that things won't happen - rarely does birth go as "planned" - but at least you will be an active part of the decision making process.

Good luck!

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S.W.

answers from San Diego on

I had a doula and an informed partner at the birth who were aware of my birth preferences. Thank goodness! We started at home, moved to the birth center, were transferred to the hospital and narrowly avoided a Cesarean. So, yeah, their advocacy was definitely put to use. That is one use of a written birth plan, so your partner(s) can be on point with you. Talk to your nurses and politely and discreetly request a different nurse if they absolutely don't vibe with you.

The thing that helped us the most was a tour of the delivery wing of the hospital prior to the due date. We saw the layout, learned their protocols (like they mandate immediate skin to skin contact after delivery, encourage breastfeeding, etc.) and met the doctor and his colleagues. We did this as a formality as we believed we would be having the baby at the birth center, haha, good thing we did! Please do this if you possibly can! Ask about volunteer doulas too and talk to your birth partner about your wishes.

And no matter what happens, a happy healthy baby is the plan! Best of luck!

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J.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

I wrote a birth plan. And in the excitement that ensued following my water breaking 2 weeks early, I forgot the birth plan at home! I ended up with a c-section since my daughter was breech. But we were both healthy and in the end...it was all good.

So I suggest, putting the birth plan IN the hospital bag, no later than 4 weeks before your due date!

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M.C.

answers from Pocatello on

A birth plan is a great way to get out what your *ideal* labor and delivery would look like. That said... if your labor doesn't go "perfectly"... your plan will, in essence- go out the window.

What to bring to labor? YOUR VOICE, and loving supportive people who will back up what you want. Your birth partner needs to be your advocate, making things as close to what you want as possible! I had a great birth "experience"- but i had moments where i had to be firm in what I wanted.

I didn't want pain meds, but when my doctor decided to give me pitocin to speed along labor, the staff and my doctor assumed that meant I was going to get an epidural! The anesthesiologist was even called in and was standing outside the door when I had to say - "NO! I don't want an epidural!" I even had a short argument with the doctor about what she *thought* I had wanted (because when I was 8 weeks pregnant I had said I wanted my options open)

Thankfully my husband had attended almost all of my appointments and was able to stand up and support me! We were both clear that unless there was a REASON (like an emergency) I wanted to do this as naturally as possible. Sometimes doctors, even good ones, will want to do what is convenient rather than what you want. Bringing your voice will help you to have a more of what you want happen. Be reasonably flexible, but don't get bullied!

Give the birth plan out, but when things start changing... speak up! You don't have to be hostile about it, but ask why things are going away from your plan, and know the reasons for any changes. (and say "NO!" if the changes don't have a good reason) If something doesn't seem right, GET an explanation! Any good doctor will understand that you are just trying to be a smart, informed, active member of the "team" that will bring you a healthy delivery!

Good Luck!
-M.

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N.H.

answers from San Luis Obispo on

I wrote one for each of my childrens births (4). Most were followed. The more important document that I took was a sign for the birth room door that said "Positive Attitudes Only". Really made a difference in the nursing staff. They all commented that they liked being reminded that the birth of a baby is a happy thing, regardless of their workload! :)

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C.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hey Elena,
I did write out a very specific birth plan but nothing in it on my end was followed. However, EVERYTHING in relation to my son was followed to the letter. Just keep in mind that not everything goes as planned and be willing to change your plans if necessary.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

I have found that birth plans go out the window once labor starts. In reality,
you can just tell nurses what you would like vs. what you do not want.
Many women go in with the no pain clause, and change their minds. When
their babies are born again, even if you are a c-section, you can still
express your wishes.

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D.R.

answers from New York on

i wrote a very well thought out and long birth plan with my first baby. i still remember my doc reading it all with me, and saying to me that its fine, he will try his best, but to remember that "man plans, Gd laughs" .... it didnt go quite the way i planned. my best advice is to go ahead and make your plan, go over it with your doc, but be flexible. there are so many different factors, not to mention so many different people. (the nurses at the hospital are likely to be spending much more time with you than your doc actually will) ... did you ever see the movie "knocked up"? i love that movie. so like he says in the movie ... "we have a new plan, get that baby out safely". thats the goal, and you dont know what Gd or your baby might have in mind. keep your ideal in mind, but be flexible and listen to your body. oh, and just fyi, i had 2 more babies after that, and i still tried for my "ideal" .... it didnt work out those times either, i had huge babies and minor issues, but i didnt care because i have 3 healthy babies :) if i was lucky enough to do it again, i would still try again for my ideal, knowing i would probably have to abandon it. it doesnt hurt to try. have faith in your doc, mostly have faith in your body, it is amazing. my cut to the chase advice, mama to mama - 1.push like you are trying to poop on the table. 2.if you must get induced, dont ever get pictocin without an epidural... and 3 bring lots of lip balm :) oh, and an extra camera is a good idea too, dont wanna miss the most wonderful moment ever ( can you tell im jealous? i am!) best of luck to you!

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K.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

I did not write a birth plan for either delivery but my husband and I discussed the basics together so we knew what we wanted and he could advocate strongly if needed.
By birth plan and basics I mean epidural and no c-section unless medically necessary (convenience wasn't an ok reason for me). Also breast feeding, no formula.
The rest was more go with the flow because we knew you never know what will happen in reality and having a highly detailed plan means expectations that are likely to not be met. We were lucky and had great nurses and wonderful birth experiences, at two different hospitals in San Diego county with different doctors/medical staff.
For me having a husband for a birth coach/partner who was involved, knew my wishes and was strong enough to assert himself with staff if needed was key. Having that partner in the delivery room when I was overtired and in pain was a relief and wonderful.
Good luck, hope all goes well!

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I think a birth plan is a great idea as long as you remember you cannot control everything during labor and delivery. It is a fine line between pushing for what you want and letting the nurses and doctors do their job. Their goal is for a healthy baby and mom.

I wrote a birth plan for my second child and this is pretty much all it said.

1. I don't plan on using any pain medication.
2. I would like to breastfeed as soon after birth as possible!
3. I would like the baby to stay with me whenever possible, and please do not take the baby from my room without waking me up first!

And then there was some additional information because my husband was deployed to Iraq at the time.

Make it very simple is my advice!

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E.S.

answers from Dayton on

I wrote one for both of my deliveries...though after the 1st, I thought writing a 2nd was a waste of time.
My best advice-keep it short and sweet. If you are lucky enough to get a nurse who will actually take a moment to read it you want her to be able to read it quick.

Make a short list of what you do not want. That is the most important.

W/ my 1st the head nurse did not read anything I wrote and I walked into the hospital ready to push...I could no longer communicate effectively...thankfully another nurse had read what I wanted and saved me from some unnecessary interventions.
But that was about all the good it did. Baby had low birthweight, injested mecconium and jaundiced, spent nearly 3 days in an incubator. :(

W/ my 2nd I changed hospitals and midwives to avoid the same scenario again. Thank the good Lord (!), I didn't even need that silly old birthplan as what I wanted was par for the course. (Waterbirth and baby didn't leave my room once till we left together.)

Again, I can't stress enough to keep it brief! Only include in it THE most important things to you. And yes, be prepared for things to not go as you want. Even w/ my 2nd (ideal) birth things weren't perfect.

Something we were encouraged to do was to bring some goodies and a thank you card for our nurses. They really appreciate it when you are appreciative. :)

Hope that helps!
Happy Birth Day!!!

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C.K.

answers from Springfield on

A birth plan is helpful to be you and the hospital staff. It puts your thoughts together like if you want medication for pain and when you want it, who you want to be there holding your hand, if you want to nurse your baby right away, have skin to skin contact, and how you want to labor. I am a doula, and we use birth plans as a blue print that changes can always be made to. It's your birth and a plan just helps you answer questions that you are going to want answered ahead of time instead of when your working hard at having a baby. :)
always be prepared and know that plan A can always turn to plan B. Good luck on having a great birth! You can look up examples of birth plans online too.

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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

There are some things that you may need more paperwork for than a birth plan. I wanted a tubal ligation performed if I needed a C-section (I didn't). Apparently my hospital would not accept 'informed consent' for a sterilization procedure once any pain meds had been given (although able to give consent for the C-section, huh?). So I signed an informed consent on this, brought a copy with me and had a copy placed in my medical record at the hospital at my last prenatal appointment. I did not write out a birth plan, primarily since my plan was basically an epidural and a C-section only if my health or my son's was at risk - same approach as my o.b. I am a medical professional as is DH so I felt we were both able to effectively advocate for my wishes.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

Hi Elana, I'm not sure i understand what you are talking about, most delieveries are used with standard proceedures that the doctor and the medical staff are trained and ready for, Your wish i;m sure to is to have a healthy happy baby and they don't need any plan, they just know what to do. J.

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