Desperately Need Potty Training Help for Boy/ Girl Twins.

Updated on March 09, 2009
T.G. asks from Ladson, SC
11 answers

I deserately need help finding a potty training technique that will work for me. My twins are 3 now and have been fighting potty training for a year and a half. I am so tired of diapers and it's become an issue for daycare possibilities and summer camps. My first daughter was fully potty trained by 2 so this is baffleing and frustrating to me. Any ideas would be appreciated.

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answers from Charleston on

Hi! I too have B/G twins that are 2 1/2 yrs and we are starting to potty train. So far my son is not really interested, but my daughter seems to really like going in there. It's just a matter of reminding her and a lot of praise. Plus she loves washing her hands afterwards. We haven't really pushed the issue. I think I will try the underwear/training pants method on a long weekend with just her. I think if she trains first, he will want to do it too. Good luck and let me know what works for you!

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answers from Atlanta on

I don't have boy/girl twins but I have twin girls and what finally worked for me with a little help from my mom too (Thanks mom!) You just have to go all or nothing. Meaning take them to the store let them pick out some "big girl panties" and "big boy underwear". Make a big deal out of it too like it's their special day. I would even say split them up and let them pick out the underwear seperate. Second put the underwear on them and leave them on! Meaning don't chicken out when you "go out" bring PLENTY changes of clothes with you, wipes, ziploc bags for your trash. Don't switch back and forth between pull-ups and underwear.
At night I did indeed use a pull-up but once they started to get the hang of things during the day I completely took them out. Was it inconvenient? Um yeah Was it tiresome? Yup Was it stressful? At times but just remember that eventually they will catch on but you have to stick to ONE method regardless if they are male or female in my opinion. My girls were fully trained within two weeks of this. YES they still had accidents but kids will and expect it too. I bought a waterproof matress pad as well for when they started wearing panties to bed. Believe me it will only take so long before they "get it" I don't think I have ever met a kid that liked to sit in their own mess! I could be wrong but this is what worked for me- ALL or NOTHING.

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answers from Charleston on

I kinda just skipped the pull-up stage except to use at night. I had my daughter wear underwear and put the potty in an common area. If she peed herself then I would have her clean up the mess (with my help of course). I would tell her over and over "No pee pee or poo poo in pants. Pee and poop go in potty." We used a sticker chart too. She didn't like to be wet so it didn't take long before she caught on. If we kept her in diapers or pull ups then she would just go in them. It's messy to train without diapers but I think they catch on faster.



answers from Savannah on

You haven't said what all you have tried so it's hard not to tell you something you may have already done. But my daughter was a stubborn potty trainer so by time she was coming up on 3yrs I just started putting her in underware at home. If she had an accident, she had to clean herself up and toss her dirty clothes into the washer (she didn't have to wash them). If we left the house I would put a pull up on over her underware, and same thing, if she peed while we were out, she had to clean herslef up when we got home. After about a week of that, she tosed in the towel and started to pee on the potty. She would have an accident here and there but it was all good.

You can also try potty candy, potty chart with stickers, etc. For your son, make sure he is sitting down and not having to stand unless you like to wash your toilet, walls and floor every day! And you can also tell them that they can't go back to prescshool if they don't pee in the potty as well. Most kids love going to school so that might be the push they need as well.

Good luck!



answers from Macon on

You said the solution in your letter DAYCARE. Once they are around their peers & seeing them go potty then children usually follow the pattern. If it is a structured daycare they will have a schedule in place for them. With you having a boy/girl set of twins they may not follow each other that well. Now here is the tricky part getting us (the parents) on that same schedule which isn't always that easy if we have alot of activities outside of the home.

I'm a single working mom of a son 18, daughter 7, & the kicker another son age 2 as of October & daycare played a major part of potty training all 3. Although my 2yr old isn't completely trained he started at 18 months. He is doing very well, he's already aware of what the tingling sinsation is when it's time to go. So this is the only time I ever want any of my kids to be influenced by their peers is to go potty.



answers from Atlanta on

T., my daughter potty trained at an early age but basically I used a mix of letting her run around naked on the weekends and extensive verbal praise when she went potty in the toilet.
I also realized that she and I had a communication problem. I told her to let me know when she had to go POTTY. And I would also say"u went POTTY in your pants" And "do you need to go TO THE POTTY" Basically I was using potty in different context. Finally I said you should go potty in the toilet and that stopped her from peeing on the floor and bragging about it. Apparently she thought I wanted her to go potty, she didnt know I wanted her to go potty in the toilet.

Suddenly one day, not long after that, she just stopped using the bathroom in her diaper. And that same day(in her presence) I told some one that I was toliet training her and how great she was doing. It wasnt necessarily true, but I knew she was listening.

Good luck...let them go naked this weekend!!!



answers from Augusta on

for my boys I just told them they could not go to school or friends house and our last son we took camping for a week and by the time we came back he was trained or try cherrios in the toilet and tell them to se eif they can hit the cherrio the sticker chart worked wonders



answers from Columbia on

Twins are tough. I took advice from another twin mom and waited until they were holding their urine overnight. I then started with the more compliant twin as handling two at a time just didn't work for me. I put him in underwear at home and kept him in rooms without carpet. He trained quickly. The other twin refused to potty train. I gave him a little more time (few weeks) until he finally told me he wanted to use the potty. It could have been all the rewards the other was receiving too. We used all sorts of positive reinforcement - M&Ms (they don't eat a ton of candy as a general rule), sticker charts to select toy, etc. They sell charts in children's educational stores or you can make your own. Daycare was supportive as well, even allowing the M&Ms! I know it is frustrating. Good luck and hang in there!



answers from Athens on

Sometimes I think the more you want it and the harder you try it won't happen.

I also had boy/girl twins - they are now 27. I used cloth diapers that many years ago. I have since had another boy, 18; and a girl 16. I found that being twins didn't mean they did everything at the same time and especially the potting training. The boys were a lot harder and took longer especially the B.M.s. My twin son went to the corners and hid when it was time for his B.M.s. The girls were a lot easier! My younger son was a bed wetter, until he was 8 or so. He seemed to sleep through it and then wake up, he also slept walk. Patience and perserverance does pay off, with work when the time is right you will look back and say wow when did it really happen. The more pressure you put on them and on yourself the less chance it will happen sooner.

Good Luck, they are only young once.

Married mother of 4, with one granddaughter and another on the way in May.



answers from Atlanta on

I skipped the pull-ups altogether. To the child they are still like the diaper and they don't feel what the wetness from the tee-tee really is. I put regular "big boy pants" and "big girl panties" on them. Believe me it didn't take long with this because they didn't like the cold wetness. When they had an accident I took them to the potty and said "tee-tee goes here - not in big boy pants". It also helped that I started taking them to the potty about every 30 minutes and sat down beside them for a few minutes and just sat there. Sometimes they would potty and when they did I made a really big deal about it. I mean major clapping and stickers and sometimes candy. I know it can be harder with 2 but if you get the one that is more compliant like another person said then the other one will see all the clapping and fun from the one going to potty. I do agree that the more you want something the more they resist and they can pick up signals from you that you really want it. Just try to not make a big deal about it and just make it fun and exciting for them. I did still put pull-ups on them at night and if we went out but at home I would just strip them down and let them wear "undies". Good luck and I hope things work out. Hang in there.



answers from Atlanta on

The advice you've already gotten is great (especially that daycare will most likely solve this).
One more piece of advice that worked great for both my daughter and son. They would do great and then we'd be in the car and they would have to go. I kept my arsenal in the back of our minivan: portable potty, antibacterial spray cleaner, ziploc bags, wipies and paper towels. I would pull over anywhere and everywhere when they said they had to go. They could sit comfortably on the potty and do their business. When done, I'd clean the potty out (pour the urine outside), and all the waste (papertowels, wipies, etc.) went into a ziploc bag so that my car didn't smell. The next stop we made I'd throw away the ziploc. This gave my kids peace of mind that they could go whenever they needed to and we all didn't have to worry about trying to find a place or having to deal with any smelly stuff either.
Hope this helps,

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