Delay in Fine Motor Skills??

I say work with him before you panic. If you haven't tried to work with him yet I would do that first. My daughter is 3 and didn't hit all of her milestones because we weren't aware of what the doctor would look for. Within a month she had all of them down pat.

I don't have any good advice or any at all actually. I just wanted to say that sometimes I think they want so much from kids now a days. And he will catch on when he is ready. I wish you the best of luck! My son is 3 1/2 and isn't drawing shapes, writing his name, he doesn't even recognize the alphabet and such. But maybe we should work harder since he is only 6 mos behind you lil 1. Again I wish you the best of luck!

hi T.,

WE are having the same issue with my son. He turned 4 august 8th. His fine motor skills are "below average" as well. He is also left handed which makes it kinda difficult for my husband and I who are right handed to teach him how to cut with scissors because it's so backwards. He's getting better, but we still have to work with him ALOT on this. if we let him, he will still hold a pencil/crayon/marker by his fist and just draw large circles and say it's a "roller coaster".
Our pre school teacher was the one that pointed it out to us, not our doctor, but they do work with them on this. We do lots of stuff at home to help him. Sometimes it clicks and other times he could care less. He's not an artsy type of kid. You could tell that the work he brings home from school was just kinda put together. But I can tell he's getting better and better each week.
Overall, I'd say it's pretty normal and kids develop so differently. I do think like some of the other moms that have resonded that they do expect sooooooo much more from children younger and younger these day and it puts a great deal of pressure on these kids to perform. Some just arn't built that way and need more time to mature and grow.

T.,
I agree with the others, don't stress; I hate when doctors do that to moms! I am an Occupational Therapist and there is a wide range as to the "whens" kids should be doing things. It sounds like he is progressing and that is what is important. If it makes you feel better, talk to his pre-school teacher since she sees him regularly instead of the brief time the doctor sees him. I would not push the handwriting right now, but what I would do is provide activities for him that strengthen the small muscles in the hands that prepare kids for writing. Just as another writer said, things that he can knead with his hands as well as building it into normal life - let him help you knead bread dough that you are going to have for dinner! Play dough, clay, and sandbox play are great ideas. You can also provide other fine motor things such as legos, squirt guns (first finger and thumb development) in the bathtub, pinch type clothespins (have him place them on your clothes and then remove them), beads (not the teeny tiny ones) on string to make things (Michaels Crafts has some great kid craft kits to make things like key chains etc), painting on an easel (provides work for his entire arm as he works against gravity), finger painting, pudding painting, shaving creme painting (these can be done on easel as well), games (Pop Up Pirate, Don't Spill the Beans, Perfection (without the timer!!!), Cootie; A deck of cards is also good for fine motor for flipping the cards, taking them out one at a time, and then of course the matching aspect as well; placing coins in a bank with a slot on the top; and then simple household tasks like putting away the silverware. If you smother him with cutting and handwriting tasks, he will feel your stress and pressure - they should be secondary to the other wonderful things that you can provide through play. Look at your toys and games that you have in your house and you will become a super sleuth for fine motor things, that he will never know he is working on, but will know that he is having fun with his family!

Relax...but do work on it with him. I have worked in preschool classes with 4 year olds who could write their name and in Kindergarten classes with children who (at the beginning of the year) could not. It's best if he learn, but he's not behind too much yet.

Have fun! This is such an exciting time for you!

S.

PS: I zip coats every day too! :)

Just consider another aspect. I have an 18 year old, leaving for the Air Force and to see his handwriting....takes me back to when one first starts to learn cursive. It's appalling actually.
And what, really, IS proper holding for a pen, crayon, or pencil?
Don't sweat the petty stuff. If he's got learning skills and understands loads, then weigh the importances. Is it really such a monumental thing? Especially at his age? I don't think so. We all have strong points, we all have lesser talents. So let's focus on the strong points and maybe gradually implement the weaker areas.

I agree with the recommendations to talk to the preschool staff, they know your son better than the doctor. Based on their recommendations you may want to see if you can get help for OT through the intermediate school district or through your health insurance. I look at it as any help they can get is good for them as long as it doesn't make them feel singled out or "bad".

My main reason for saying this is, a lot of the things they look for on these developmental lists, rely on practice. My son is 2 1/2 and has gross motor delays, and some of the fine motor stuff he didn't do yet because he hadn't had the opportunity to practice - we were always working on gross motor stuff. The same is true of speech. He hadn't passed certain milestones that "he" was focusing on, so he hadn't gotten to some of the speech tasks yet. Anyway, he is currently working with a teacher from the ISD for an hour a week. She is wonderful and has great suggestions for us to do with him at home. Same with the physical therapist he saw for a year and a half. Parent participation and cooperation and practice at home is crucial.

So if you can get help without breaking the bank or tying yourself in knots working out the schedule, I would say do it, but if not, the preschool teachers could probably suggest a lot of things to work on, on your own at home. The other moms had a lot of good suggestions that I have also been told to try.

"Don't worry, they all do things at their own pace" is one way to look at it - we were told that a lot with our son. But professionals who specialize in certain areas can tell you more about why it might help for your son to master these areas now. That is why we got help for our son when his deficits became clear. Then we wished we had done it sooner. He isn't handicapped at all, just behind enough that it was a grey area, like what you are seeing. So go with your gut, but it can't hurt to check things out.

I would definitely start working on your sons fine motor skills. I'm a pediatric occupational therapist and I work with many children on developing their fine motor coordination. Developmentally your son should be manipulating fasteners and holding crayons appropriately when coloring or drawing. As far as writing his name goes, he should be working on this, although I wouldn't be terribly concerned that he is not doing this independently yet. What I would check is to make sure he can draw the shapes necessary for letter formation. Can your son draw a circle, square, plus, X, and triangle for example. As long as he can make these shapes that means he has the ability to learn to form his letters. If he can't make these shapes yet, I would focus on helping him to make these shapes. I have kids draw using there fingers in shaving cream, in sand, try to make it as fun as possible. Once he can make these shapes then I would focus on letter formation. I hope this helps.

Hi T., I am a mom of a 3 year old girl. She actually just turned 3 this past week. About a month ago, she started drawing herself. Big Head, hands and feet that sprouted off the head, curly hair, eyes, nose and a mouth. It was the first time something she put on paper looked like anything really. She does hold her pencil/crayons correctly most of the time. Practicing these skills will probably help him a lot, but I wouldn't go too overboard with it... it has to be fun for him... My daughter has done everything quicker than most. She walked at 9 months, is talking up a storm and is overall very coordinated. I did not know that this was different from other 2-3 years olds either because she is my only child. I'm sure everything will be just fine because your son has you...

I have a set of 6 yr old triplets. My son Brody is also behind in his motor skills and always has been. He has just started holding his pencil correctly. You can go to a teacher supply store and get an "Alligator grip" it is a rubber piece that you slip on a pencil and it puts their fingers in the correct position. ALso his kindergarten teacher last year told me to get him a lot of things for him to kneed with his hands and build up those muscles. Playdough, clay, sand, wet wash cloths in the bath, cookie dough, bread dough, ect. I hope this helps. :) Good luck.

T.,
Hey, don't take it personally. Today's society puts such a huge comparison on children that the child grows up thinking he's not good enough or smart enough or tall enough .. I could go on and on, but I think you get the picture! Let the child be himself and remember that every child grows and develops at his/her own levels and speeds you can't compare ANY child to another!! No matter what everyone else says! Just love him unconditionally or else he'll always wonder if he's good enough! By God, every child is perfect just the way they are!! Don't try to impose others opinions on him and have him live with everyone's elses insecurities the rest of his life!!! You can still work with him of course, but make it fun!!! He'll pick it up when HE'S ready!

C.
A little about me: Mom of 4 (3 boys, 10,9,7 and 1 girl,5) homeschooling for 6 years; married for 14years to a great hard working husband.

If your health insurance covers occupational therapy, have him assessed by an OT via your plan.

Contact your local school district's special services department and request the paperwork for an eval/assessment, there, too. It's free. You must request in writing.

An OT (either private or through the school district) can give you specific activities to give him practice. Have him color w/ tiny pieces of broken crayons--he has to change his grasp and work fine motor in order to do that. Picking up items w/ tweezers and tongs (cotton balls, marbles, a variety of sizes and weights).

Clinics like Abilities Center, Kaufman Center, Kids in Motion are all great! Find one in your area.

P.

T., I really wouldn't get stressed out about this. My five-year-old could barely write a thing at four - he just kind of scribbled. He's five and a half, in kindergarten now, and doing just fine. Now his letters are recognizable and he knows most of them. He also couldn't cut well at four and I've always helped him get his coat on. I really think that kids develop at different rates and there's a whole range of normal. If he seems fine socially and his preschool teachers hasn't said anything to you, try to relax. I'm sure it will all come together (I've got two other much older kids - my 11 year old only learned his letters in first grade, just wasn't interested before that - now he reads college level books, gets straight As....I suppose you could have said he was developmentally delayed, but now he's just unbelievably smart, which will probably be how your son is!) Good luck - Alison

Children today must know so much more than we had to know, I remember begining kintergarden and only needed to tie my shoes, now they are velcro. Don't worry to much, he will catch up, so many toys, which are teaching toys out there, some of our family at Christmas on our wish list ask for real toys, not teaching toys, because they want to children just to play. Crayola has books and crayans that would be great for him, have your son put his name on every paper he draws at home, ask him to cut out coupons for you, and put his name on that as well, stencil books,have him write groshery list short milk bread, lable his room, he can draw a pic, name on it, and have it laminated, then he will see his own progress on writing his name. He just needs to practice, and to let learning be fun, a game, something he will look forward to doing. Don't be to concerned, every child learns at their own pace, mabie he will be a Dr. no one can read their hand writing. Best of luck B.

T.,

My daughter is delayed in her fine motor skills and is currently seeing an Occupational Therapist for the last 9 months. She's just turned seven years old (1st grade)and has made great improvments. One of the things that really helped was handwriting without tears. It breaks down the shapes of letters into small shapes to help a child gain confidence in combining the shapes to make letters of the alphabet. Ask your preschool teacher is she's heard of this and can help.

I also have a son that will be five in March. He's great at coloring and cutting but is still tracing his name and has to be reminded on how to correctly hold his pencil from time to time. I'm not worried as I know these skills are progressing at preschool.

I wouldn't worry too much but have him checked out by an OT just to get a professional opinion if you feel it could help. They have wonderful ways of working with the kids that never even entered my mind to try. Good luck and hang in there!

By the examples of what you can do from the OT's, you can see that they are easily done at home. However remember all kids are different. If they recognize things keep working on that and it will come. Let your son be more independent and "force" him to try by himself. This takes lots of time and patience but that's part of the learning process. God made us all different!

HI T.,

I think you should take this seriously, and act on it now. A dealy in fine motor skills may be all he has, or he could have other dealys, and an occupational therapist can test and diagnosis to get him age appropiate. The question you need answered is why does he have low fine motor skills, and that can't be anwered without an evaluation. By next year, when he gets to kindergarten, he may have learning difficulties, that you could ward off now with proper treatment. You could contact your school district's early development program, but they won't treat him or give him a full comprehensive evaluation unless he 'screens' to be 2.5 years behind or more. I did that and because of their failure to diagnose properly, my child had to repeat kindergarten. Then when I got him a full evaluation, and he was properly treated, he got up to speed. I recommend, like the first responder, that you go to a center specializing in children's development for a full evaluation. And I think it is fantastic that your doctor recognizes this, usually they don't and this gets unnoticed until they fail in school. Because the range of development in this grade is so great, I do not rely on the teacher's to tell me if my child has a delay or not. I'm not trying to scare you, but frankly, no one can say if it is nothing or not until a full evaluation is done. That includes teacher's, doctors, friends, etc. It reaquires a full evaluation by an OT specializing in children's development. Your doctor thiks it is worth looking into, I would follow that advice.

You wanted to know where some other 4 year olds are, soooo... I have a son that turned 4 on June 12th so he is 4 1/2 now. When he turned 4 he DID NOT hold anything right, write his name, color anything other then swirls etc... I worked with him doing just his name and got a handwriting book off the internet (you don't have to buy anything, as you have found there is a TON of free stuff). He doesn't really care to do any of that stuff but does write his name (sometimes backwards or mixed up) and is even starting to color people with real faces and hair :). So don't worry all the little girls in his Bible class were WAY ahead of him but he is learning and your son will be fine too. GOOD LUCK!!! and GOD bless.

My son is 4.5 and can write his name, draw shapes, write all of his letters and numbers, do his own zipper, belt, shoes, snaps, still have a hard time with buttons. He was been doing all of this since about 3.5. Obviously, he has gotten better and more consistent as he gets older.

I would be concerned...but not at the point of "freaking" out. Start working with him and talk to his preschool teachers about helping him and working with him.

He may benefit from some Occuptational therapy so he can catch up before Kindergarten.

Im sorry but your doctor must not know a lot about little ones and their motor skills at that age. Your son is doing just fine. He will learn all that he needs to learn with help from you and his preschool teachers. The more you push him to do things the more he will fall back and not want to do it. Let him do it at his own pace with the help of you of course and encourage his accomplishments and dont tell him thats hes a bad boy for not knowing something. Eventually he will get it. Good luck and God Bless.

Breathe...

I have 3 kiddos so far and the middle one is 4. He does hold his crayons correctly but only because he has examples from his 7 yr old sister and mommy who tells him to hold it like there is a ball around it... (could even put a ball around it so the posture of the hand is used to it already.)
Neither of our older kids could write their names BY age 4... But around 4 1/2 yrs it just sorta clicked. They realized that those letters we tell them MEAN something and you can WRITE and READ stuff with them. Now I have a 4 yr 4mo old boy running around spelling his name to anything and everything... And writing it whereever he can....

Drs need some interpretation sometimes... If they say "By age 4 they should be..." Well, the birthday is not a magic day... Its a guideline. some kids start earlier, some later... Boys tend to do verbal, linguistic things after girls... But physical things before girls... If they arn't doing it by THE END OF AGE 4 then worry about it.

If it were a big deal his Preschool people would have noticed it...
Work with him at home and draw his attention to holding things correctly. Practice makes perfect.
Walmart has preschool activity books that you can do with him at home... Do not expect him to jump right in and gung ho learn to write the ABC"S... But you write his name and have him copy it... say the letters and spell out loud...

Good luck !

My son did very little as far as 'artistic' things until he started preschool this Sept. He turned 4 in May and still doesn't zip his coat or tie his shoes. Just since preschool he has learned to use scissors, crayons, paint, etc. with good results. I must say, though, that when I go pick up his 'creations' from school there is a wide range of skill. Some are barely recognizable, while some are almost perfect. They are all within 4yo range, though, according to my opinion. My son had no interest in writing his name, now he can write it legibly with no help, and all this has happened in 3 months or less. I think you should use your judgment and your own mommy instincts on this one. If you see improvement, I wouldn't worry. If you see none, however, it's a perfect time to intervene. He won't be behind the other kids by the time it matters. Kudos to you for being involved...Im sure your little one will be just fine!

~L.

I don't know what school district you are in, but I would highly encourage you to contact your district and ask about a 'formal' evaluation. All districts have Occupational Therapists and Physical Therapists that deal specifically with those issues. They can then refer you or begin servicing your son. At my district (Clarkston)we have a special needs preschool program that works on those issues.

Also ask your son's teachers how they feel about it. They also should have some 'evaluation' tasks that they can do to see how he falls.

I would be happy to discuss this further if you would like ( I have worked in this area for 5+ years). Hope this helps!!
L.

The things your doctor has suggested are all things that preschool should be working on. Kindergarten works on that stuff a lot, too. Do you know if preschool is working on it or not? I would encourage him to work on fine motor skills but don't push it. Your son will come around when he's ready. If his teacher thinks there may be a problem then I would look into it further. If not, don't worry about it and let him go at his own pace. Your doctor only sees your son on a limited basis where the teacher is seeing him a few times a week. Sometimes doctors forget what's a "normal" milestone for kids, too, they push to have the kids do better than what they are ready for. Trust yourself, a Mom's instinct is rarely if ever wrong.

I can see that you've had a lot of responses, yet 1/2 seem to say not to worry, and 1/2 say you should... Here's my 2 cents. I have 3 children. My oldest could write and cut by age 2, so when my next didn't do the same, of course I worried. At 4 she still did not have great fine motor skills. She hated to write and her cutting was way "below average" But her gross motor skills were always way "above" average. Now at 6 her writing and cutting are just fine. All kids learn and develop at different rates. DON"T STRESS, and DON'T make a huge deal with your son. Yes, you should work with him on these skills, but keep it fun. My children all go to Montessori schools, and they have a lot of works out on the shelves to develop fine motor skills. Such as spooning beans from 1 cup to another, using large tweezers to pick up objects to place in a bowl. There are a lot of fun activites that are not just workbook pages. Also, just take the extra time to let him button his buttons and zip his coat. It takes A LOT of practice, but they are so proud of themselves when they can accomplish task on their own!
Good luck. It took my many years to learn that I can't compare my children with all the others. Each child is so different. A good teacher would let you know if this really was an issue that you needed to be concerned about.

T.,
I think there is a big difference from child to child as far as who is doing what at a certain age. Your child's fine motor skills may be fine, but perhaps he hasn't had much practice at writing his name. Also, my 4 yr old tries to get me to do things for him that I know he could do himself (and sometimes I do it for him, just because it's quicker).
I would say definitely work with him on developing these skills, but do not stress that there is something wrong with him. I help out in my son's preschool class (with the 3-4 yr olds), and there is such a range of skills and abilities. Don't worry!
M.

T.,

I am a former preschool teacher and if your doctor feels there may be delays, I would schedule an appointment to talk to your child's preschool teacher(s). Your doctor gets a snapshot of your child whereas you and your child's teachers spend more time with him. The things your doctor mentioned are true, eventually your child will be doing those things, but as an outsider I would say it is okay if he isn't doing them right now. Your child's teachers will be working on these skills too and you can do them at home as well. I always encouraged parents to leave ample time when getting dressed so they can teach their child these skills. I know it's quicker to do it yourself, but it will delay your child learning how to care for himself. As far a writing his name goes, again I had children come to school knowing how to do this and I also had kids who were never exposed to writing their name. It should be something they are doing in preschool. I do recommend you work with him on his grip though. That is a very hard habit to break. One of the easiest ways for kids to learn this is by giving him those stubby, broken crayons. You know, the short ones that are created when one breaks. This will force his hand to hold the crayon the right way. Again, your child's teacher should be able to give you more suggestions as well. I hope I don't sound like a broken record, but being a former teacher I feel communication/concerns need to be addressed between home and school. The teachers cannot help your child if they don't know you have concerns and it's hard for you to address these issues alone when this is the first time you are going through it. Good luck.

A.