Dani's 1St Bday

Updated on June 01, 2009
B.M. asks from Honolulu, HI
33 answers

Hey Mom's
I had a question for you all dani is getting ready to turn 1. and i wnt to through a party for her but i didn't know if i should go all out since she wouldn't really remember it it's more for me. Dani is very out going and loves people. She will go up to people @ the beach and play with them or talk the lil words she knows to them. What do you guys think. Go all out on her 1st bday or just have a lil get together

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So What Happened?

So we had a lil party at chucky cheese...it was friends and family. Of coarse dani was so unaware of what was going on. she had a blast with the cake and the ice cream! it's was so fun...I think the adults had more fun than dani did. But i'm so glad we didn't go all out because she really had no idea of what was going on. She did enjoy the company of all her family and friends.... Next yr we will prob do a bigger party!
Thanks for the advise

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B.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I like the "one (child) guest for each year of age" rule of thumb. The kids (if the guest is similar age) will enjoy the wrapping paper more than the gifts, and will maybe explore each other, a little bit. Any food, etc. will be more for the adults than the kids (one year olds generally come with one or more adults). That way, if the little friend has a sib, you can let them come too and you still won't be overrun with kids. If you want more kids, by all means have them, but for the one year old, the decorations, a candle to blow out, a bite of cake, etc. will be plenty of excitement.

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H.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Have a meaningful, but simple birthday. Little ones do not benefit from big parties and lots of people at that age. Either have close family or a few friends with some little ones. Have some balloons and streamers for decoration. Bubbles and maybe balls as gifts for the little guests. Have cupcakes (I always made one layer of the cake than put cupcakes around the outside...much easier to serve. Enjoy fellowship with some family or friends.
H.

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R.U.

answers from Las Vegas on

Go for the smaller get together. Have a few close family and/or friends over. Enjoy the time with her instead of worrying about guests and their needs. Too many presents may frustrate her; my daughter wanted to play with her toys instead of opening more. Definitely have cake and video tape her reaction. We had a small family party and still talk about the cake.

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B.B.

answers from San Diego on

We went all out for my little one's first and loved it. We have fond memories and great pictures from that day. I have also been to very small intimate family gatherings for a first birthday that have been lovely. I would do whatever you feel like doing. I don't think there is an expectation from your child or your family and friends at this age :)

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R.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi my name is R. and I have 2 boys 8 and 4. When I had my first boy I went all out spended a lot of money for his first birthday, hey he was my baby and he was turning 1, but now I think that is not the right thing to do. First of all they don't even remember when they are turning 1. My son doesn't remember, so what I'm saying is that yes have a little get together with family and friends but don't spend a lot of money on it. I hope this was a good advice and enjoy your baby now because they grow fast. Take care and have fun!

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E.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Her memories will be based on picture only, so I would do a small family only get together. My daughter didn't understand parties until she was 2.5 so at 3 she had her first real party and had a blast. Save your money until she understand.

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S.B.

answers from Visalia on

Hello! I say go all out! I know your little one will not remember but you can take lots of pictures to share later. We went all out for my daughter and son's 1st birthdays. Have a great time!

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S.A.

answers from Reno on

We live away from ALL of our family. So, for my son's first birthday we flew home (where both my husband's and my family live) and had a birthday celebration for him there. It was not a huge elaborate production, but it was a party. It was a swimming party at my parent's home and I made centerpieces, balloons, cake, party favors, dinner, etc. He may not remember the details of the day, but we have pictures and a video of the event. Even now, he likes to watch it and look through the pictures. It was a big deal to me and my husband to celebrate it. We are getting ready to have our second child and I plan and hope to do the same thing for her 1st birthday as well.

Everyone has an opinion about what you should and shouldn't do, but in the end, you should do what makes you happy. For some it's a big deal, for others, it's not.

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S.M.

answers from Fayetteville on

That is all up to you. No matter what you do the first birthday will be special. I chose to go the small route, didn't spend very much. I felt that the babies weren't going to remember it so why the added stress and money. Now, some may disagree with my choice, but I don't regret it. Since then my kids have had pretty awesome birthdays that they will remember; waterparks, parasailing, two-day events.

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A.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi B.,

We went all out for our son's 1st birthday. We had a circus theme and had a clown, balloon twister, a carousel and cotton candy machine and a designer cake. We did it knowing full well that he may never have clear memories of the day (though we took lots of pictures for him to look back on one day). The point of the party was to celebrate surving the first year. As first time parents, we were clueless and the first year was quite change and experience with highs and lows. At times, it seemed like we would never get sleep again which was exhausting. But we got the joy of seeing the first smile, the first words, the first everything and how incredible this little life that we created was. We wanted to share this celebration with our family and friends and have a truly memorable day. I am glad we went all out and have no regrets and our son had a wonderful day as did our friends and family.

Hope this perspective helps.

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J.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

Little get together for sure. We had about 20 people and it was almost to much. All of my friends that had big parties had regrets. Children melt down when overstimulated at this age. When they are older they can appreciate it more anyway in my opinion. Kids parties are over the top now and in my opinion people get caught up in what other people think to much. Good luck and have fun no matter what you decide.

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C.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

Depends on what you can handle. My daughter will be turning one and my husband and I are discussing the same issue. We want a big party for family and friends to share the joy but it is a great deal of work that I am not sure I am prepared to do. I would also like to enjoy the day with my daughter and not sure if that will happen with a big party. If it will be just you and no help, do what you can manage by yourself.

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J.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

make it as big or small as you would like. either way it will be special. with my daughter we threw a bash even though it was basically all family and a few friends. her second bday was much bigger. you only need to a party for a couple hours. i did child friendly snacks (chips, cut up fruits/veggies, hambergers, sodas and waters). i did goodie bags for the kids and favors that would work for the kids comming (my groups aged from 8 months to 6yrs). i didnt do candy or a pinata. just simple things. i didnt even have a theme for her first bday. just do whats easy for you :)

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J.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

1st birthdays are about cake on the face pictures and Margueritas ;) Have fun, celebrate Dani's first year, and all your family has accomplished!
My boy is turning 1 in 2 months. We are having a BBQ with whomever wants to come. Low key, but a great excuse for a party.
Congrats!

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G.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

it absolutely depends on your child. if there's one thing i learned about small children, do NOT put them in a situation that is not appropriate for the moment. my kids never once had a meltdown or temper tantrum at the store because i absolutely never took them when they were tired, hungry, etc.

same with the party ... if you have an easy going kid who is used to being around people, i suggest you make it big but keep it outside so everyone is roaming around and the child can play. if you have a sweetheart who is still colicky or doesn't like the stress, keep it with your family with whom the child is familiar.

have fun and take lots of pictures. the grocery stores usually give you the individual baby's bday cake for free when you buy a cake from them fyi.

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C.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

You should do what YOU want to do. no, she won't remember it. So what. Are you up for a big party? In my husbands culture the 1st child's (I should say 1st SON) 1st bday is a big deal. So, our oldest had over 50 people at a party. #2 and #3 had cake at home. none of them have a clue it was different for them.

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L.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

I went all out...but on a budget. I had almost 40 people over and it was not as bad as I thought it would be. You'll need helpers for sure with the food, set up, decorations, someone to take pictures, etc. Most importantly, make sure Dani takes a nap before the party. I had my party for my baby last weekend and it was a hit! It just takes lots of planning. I spent about $300 which included the children's gift bags and the cake. BTW-I probably got more than $1200 worth in gifts....but she has very generous relatives.

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S.Z.

answers from Reno on

Do what feels right to YOU. We always had small birthday parties when the kids were very small. I believe in celebrating, but make sure you're thinking about Dani, not about what other people think or whether they'll approve or be impressed. Enjoy this milestone!

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N.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi B.

I have to say that in my experience a lot of 1 year olds spend their first birthday parties crying because they can become totally overwhelmed by the amount of noise and people around them... just all a bit too much. The party is often more for the parents than for the child! What is your daughter like? Is she comfortable around lots of people and noise or is she more quiet and reserved? Be led by her in making your decision.

As you say she will not remember it anyway. The one thing that you want to make sure you get is some photos of her blowing out candles on a cake - or cup cake and and maybe a photo of her with balloons or opening a present. These are things she will love to look back on when she is older so that she knows there was a celebration but the number of people there is not important!

Good luck!

L.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

B.,
She definitely won't remember it, so do whatever you feel comfortable with. We did have a big to do at our house, proabably had 35 or so family/friends and it was really fun and I'd do it all over again. But we kept it pretty simple and casual. Then we skipped the larger parties for just family parties for the next 3 years, and just had a big one at a park with my daughter's preschool friends and our family and friends, as well. The first bithday party is definitely for the parents!

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

Just do a little get together. For my first's first we had cupcakes at the park by our house from 2p-4p. I had some snacks out for when everyone arrived, she opened presents and we sang and had cupcakes. Since the park was a few doors down from our house I kept the cupcakes in there and ran to get them when it was time. I also bought the huge variety pack of ice cream sandwiches and stuff. We just wheeled our trash can down the street. All of the kids went home with a big bottle of bubbles. My second's first was slightly bigger because the family has grown but still very low key. You have plenty more birthdays to go nuts over later. Enjoy the simplicity! =0)

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L.C.

answers from Las Vegas on

Birthdays are to be celebrated!!! My advice is to celebrate her party and let her know she is special, important and loved.

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L.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

We also had a big bash - we had all 4 sets of grandparents, lots of cousins and friends - about 75 people in all - we limited it to 2 hours from 2 - 4pm, and just had snacks and cake and ice cream. It did not interfere with her naptime and we all had a blast. And it did not cost much - the main cost was renting a canopy for the backyard - remember how hot February was? The photos from the party are priceless. The older kids did not mind that we didn't have a bouncy house - they helped set the table and give out napkins and serve cake. They also took orders for coffee and the bigger kids served that. Have fun!

S.H.

answers from San Diego on

I would really say this depends on your comfort level and what you and your husband want to do. Remember, however, that not only will your baby not remember it, it may be a bit overwhelming, so plan the party accordingly (certain activities around nap times, etc.). Our son just turned 1 in April and we opted for a casual thing. We decided to only invite immediate family and we all went to the zoo. We packed a picnic and ate in the picnic area near the Children's Zoo. We went to the petting zoo and then we all meandered around the zoo. Our son loved it and was able to nap in his stroller. After the zoo, we went back to our house for cake and ice cream. It was a fun and eventful day with lots of fun pictures, the family was able to be involved and the big bonus - very little after party clean-up;)

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S.O.

answers from San Diego on

My family has always been big on throwing a big 1 yo birthday party. It's to celebrate the first year of life, that the baby and parents made it through it. So I say, go ahead and do a big party IF you can AFFORD it. For both my kids we had about 50-60 people show up. My parents usually paid for the food instead of buying the kids a gift. My sister took care of the games and prizes. I bought all the decorations and goody bag items and rented the space at a local park (usually about $100 for a 4 hour block of time here in San Diego).

Are you guys in Hawaii? Usually the only time I hear "mainland" is from people from Hawaii. If so, you gotta throw a good 1 yo birthday party/luau. Get all the Aunty's and Uncle's involved to help you out.

Again, only throw a party that you can afford. Take pics and videos so you can show your baby later on. Also keep in mind, that if you plan to have more children, you will have to throw a similar party for them when they turn 1 yo. The kids don't care now, but later when they look back at photos and videos they will notice.

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S.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

What do you think is appropriate? A small family party or a large bash for your friends?
I had a large party at the park so that the kids could play and the adults could enjoy each other. And for the little 1 year olds I had a large gate set up with toys so they could play without any worry. I set up Connor's high chair and made him his own cake to dig into. It turned out to be a lot of fun and fairly cheep since it was only the cost of food and invitations I had to worry about.
Good luck!

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J.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

If she is outgoing just invite who you want. I know what you mean about not going all out. My sister wanted me to have a bouncer and I said no! We ended up having about twenty people (I have a big family and close friends I had to invite) and I worked the party around her schedule. I felt overwhelmed but she did good. Other than crying during presents...we decided to have lunch in the middle of presents due to her needs. 1st birthdays are memorable. Have fun!

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S.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

My SIL did the Margaritas thing too for the first birthday party! :D

The first party that my daughter really remembers was when she turned 3! Luckily, I knew that she was getting to the age of remembering that kind of stuff, so I went all out on that party...

For the first birthday, as long as you get a few photos of your child with cake, in cake, or eating cake, you'll have the "official memories" you need and you can pretty much do whatever you want for the rest of the party!! :D

Avoiding naptime is also a great suggestion, I think!! :D

Have fun!!
Huggles!!
~S.~

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B.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

Get creative. For my kids' first birthdays it was all about the family. I asked everyone in the family to write/send a letter to the child dated for a birthday in the future. It is wonderful to have letters from friends aunts, uncles, grandparents and cousins for birthdays they may not be attending through the years. Their great grandmother wrote cards for their 50th birthdays! She definitely won’t be around for those! What a treat!

Have fun!

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D.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi B.! I say go all out... We have 3 and each time we actually flew back home to the east coast and had a big party... almost like a mini family reunion. Yes they are young but there is no other time in their lives that they change so much. The first year of milestones are so remarkable and such a blessing and I feel they need to be celebrated. The memories are priceless... if you are able... make the most of it... but it doesn't mean spending a lot of money. Blessings to your family and including the 4 year old you are raising.. You have a making of a wonderful wife and mother. Happy 1st birthday to Dani!!!! Have fun no matter how you celebrate. from D.

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F.H.

answers from Los Angeles on

I say go for the big bash if that's what you want! Of course it's for you- you deserve it! You gave birth on that day and became a mother! By all means-celebrate!

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M.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

The 1st birthday party is really "we did it!" party for the parents. The thing about kids is that they are happy with just about anything. They are happy to just get to play and have a cake! On her behalf, simple would be just fine. If you want to make it bigger though, then you do what ever you'd enjoy. There would be nothing wrong with saving yourself some of the stress (and expense) and keeping it small, or with doing it up. Either way, congratulations, and have fun!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Aloha B.,
A 1st Birthday "party" is special no matter what... no matter how many people are there or not.

Yes, it's mostly for the Parents, and for taking pictures so the child can see it when they grow up.

Its up to you... what kind of party you want.
But keep in mind the timing of the "party" as a 1 year old gets tired/fussy at certain times per their nap times and most 1 year old parties are only about 1-2 hours in length... because of that.

I would not plan the party during your child's "nap time." They will be too tired to enjoy it.

Even if just a cake and candle with you, and opening a few presents... it will be special... you can have some helium balloons and flowers, and some presents for her... and take photos for Daddy to see. Safeway makes great kids cakes or cupcakes.

All the best,
Susan

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