Crying and Puking

Updated on February 08, 2008
J.K. asks from Pleasant Grove, UT
10 answers

I have a cute little boy who just turned 2 years old who has very bad sleeping habits. We have tried all the different "go to sleep" methods, and the only way he will go to sleep is with the "family bed" method, which we swore we would never do. Otherwise, what happens is he will cry until he pukes. So because of this, we have given up and now we just have to lie with him until he will go to sleep, and we've found that it's more convenient if we wait until he's REALLY tired otherwise we have to lay there for hours! He hated his crib, so we don't have him in there anymore. But i mainly would love to know if anyone has discovered a solution to this "cry until you puke" problem. I really don't want to clean up anymore puke, but he needs better sleeping habits, especially since we have another little guy on the way, due in May. It would be nice to get my 2 year old going to sleep on his own, and sleeping through the night before the next one comes.

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L.J.

answers from Casper on

I had the same problem with my son, but I chose to look at it this way....he won't want to sleep with us long and I cherish the time that he does want to be close to us. He is now 4 and sleeps in his own bed and has a bedtime. Occassionally he will come in the room at 5:30 am and sleep but not very often.

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A.L.

answers from Provo on

I have been in your shoes (and in the puke!).

First of all, for those moms who have posted below that your son might be puking to get into the warm bed - or - for those moms who have sugguested to have him clean up his own puke.... all I have to say is No Way!

My son started the routine J. spoke about right around his 1st birthday. He would get SOO worked up at the thought of me leaving his room that he would sometimes puke before I could even open the door to leave his room. For a while, I gave in too. He slept in our bed for many weeks just because I was exhausted from trying and from cleaning up all the puke. We then decided to try to sleep in his room with him in a twin bed, and simply move him into the crib once he fell asleep - that didnt work either. The second you would get near the crib he'd wake up totally alert and screaming.

So, what worked for us was - patience! I started cutting off the bottles about an hour before bed (to reduce the amt of puke if it was going to come up). Next, I tried a bed time routine. For us it was bath, then enter the baby's bedroom (already dark with soft music on - our son always sleeps with soft music), then sit in the corner with him and read one book. After the book is done I'd sit with him a bit so he could be calm and in HIS room, not ours. Finally, we'd make our way to the crib, and the clingy-ness and crying would start. I'd put him in the crib and quickly sit directly next to the crib - making sure he saw me there but not looking at him. I'd sit directly next to the crib while he cried and cried (but never puked!). If he was getting too worked up I would sometimes put my hand in the bars and pat him or softly give him the "Shhuuushh". The key with my son, was just BEING in the room till he fell asleep. He just wanted to know I was nearby.

The first two nights I was in his room for three hours! But, I can't even begin to tell you how happy I was to have a full night's sleep without a baby foot in my back! :) The next few nights only took about 15 minutes. Today my son is 18 mos old and we skip the routine all together and just lay him in his crib and close the door. It is a terrific thing!

If you try this out, let me know if it works for you! You just have to be patient and loving. Remember not to let your son see you looking at him (I usually just looked straight down while sitting by the crib). By the end of the week you can sit a little farther away from the crib and eventually be out the door :) Woo Hoo! Good luck to you! A.

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B.W.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I never had to deal with puking, but if I did I would go the route Amy Used.
Don't make him clean it up, that is gross and he couldn't help it, His emotions are just very strong.

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J.H.

answers from Billings on

My son slept with us until very recently--he is 17 months now and has had his won bed about 2 months. He did cry some when we moved him, but never did the throwing up thing. It took about three days and he was settled, and he hoestly seems to sleep better on his own! I disagree with some of the other posts that your son should have to clean his own puke. He's too young to really understand the correlation. I doubt he is doing the barfing thing on purpose anyway--there are kids who cry until they pass out, too. I would agree that putting a bed for him in your room, beside your bed, might help. Have you read any of Dr. Sears' books? "The Baby Book" has been my best friend since my daughter and son were born. It addresses co-sleeping, though I will tell you Dr. Sears is in favor of it...but there is a part that tells you how to gradually get your child to sleep in their own bed. Maybe you could also look at askdrsears.com--it is a pretty helpful website.

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T.W.

answers from Lansing on

I can not believe people would make a young child this age clean up throw-up. I do not believe they throw-up on purpose. They may cry and throw a tantrum and then get sick, but purposeful--I just don't buy that.

I feel there is a reason he is insecure, and making him cry to the point of throwing up seems cruel(this sounds like what the others are saying), and feeds that insecurity! If you really want him out of your bed, then it will have to be done gradually with love and understanding. Put a bed on your floor and hang onto his hand when he starts to get upset. Then after a while he wont need a hand, and gradually move the "bed" further away from your bed--all the while with love and reassuring. Eventually the "bed" will be in his room.

GL:)

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T.N.

answers from Wausau on

J. sometimes playing by the book is the only way to go! He worked you over when he discovered puking is his ticket to your warm cozy bed. I agree I would make him participate in cleaning it up and if it takes weeks... let it! I say he pukes you have him help clean it up throw down another clean sheet and put him right back in his OWN bed. I will say that waiting until he is really tired is a not always very effective. A consistent bed or nap time (same time everyday) in the same spot is going to be a blessing for you when number 2 gets there.

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R.R.

answers from Sioux Falls on

My daughter did this when she was about 2. We tried everything, including the sitting in the room with her until she went to sleep deal. She was stubborn. I would sit there for hours. Finally, after reading a book on Love and Logic and discussing it with my pediatrician, I basically gave her permission to puke. I would take her up to bed, and when she started crying, I gave her a towel and told her to puke on that. I told her that her hard crying would probably make her puke and that I wanted her to puke in the towel. It took once or twice with her actually puking and my then taking the towel away with no fuss, no getting her up and changing bed sheets--unless she got some puke on them,--no yelling, no real reaction on my part at all, and she stopped. I think that the lack of reaction on my part, and the realization that the crying and puking didn't get her what she wanted, made it soooo much less fun. I mean, after all, who really enjoys puking.

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C.V.

answers from Grand Rapids on

Hi J.,
My first son did this for the same reason. He was a lot younger though. I don't remember exactly how old he was but I think he was about 10 months old and what I finally ended up doing was changing the sheets and putting him back to bed. If he did it again it was usually a very small amount so I didn't go back in. It didn't take long at all for him to realize that what he was doing wasn't going to make me come back. I think it took 2 days before he stopped doing it. Every child is different so this might not work for you. Good luck.
Chris

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C.G.

answers from Milwaukee on

Have you tried making him clean up the mess when he makes himself throw up?

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J.B.

answers from Kalamazoo on

What size bed does he have. My son was out of his crib at 18 months. We tried the toddler bed and he wouldn't have anything to do with it. He wanted to sleep with us. My sister sugessted that he didn't like his bed and that we should try a twin bed. So we did and from the first night, he loved it and stayed in it. Therefore, ask him about his bed.

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