Controlled Crying

Updated on November 17, 2008
S.K. asks from Annandale, VA
7 answers

I recently started the controlled crying method, in an attempt to help my little boy (just turned 1) sleep through the night in his own cot. Previously when he would wake up he would only settle cuddled into mummy. We have had some progress, he has stayed in his cot for the last 9 nights, and whenever I go into him he knows he has to go back to sleep,lies back down and doesn't ask to get picked up anymore. However he is still waking up anywhere from 3-8 times a night and will not settle by himself. He cries and cries. I have tried leaving him crying for longer and longer but it just does not seem to be working. Do I keep persevere? Am I doing it right? I thought 9 nights would have been sufficient.Finding the sleep interruption quite exhausting!!

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B.P.

answers from Washington DC on

I'll just add the encouragement to keep going. It takes a while for them to get it, but he will. Be persistent and consistent and he will get it. You're doing fine!

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S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

S. - I read another post that suggested a sound machine. We have had one in our son's room since birth. He was in a bassinet in our room for 2 weeks and then our Pediatrician told me that I wouldn't get a good night's sleep until he was in his own room in his own crib. He actually gave me a homework assignment to get him in his crib in a certain # of night - OMG I LOVE my Ped.!!! We have a homedics sound machine with nature sounds and the one that is the most soothing is the ocean wave sounds. We still use it every night and we believe it masks the noises outside that may wake our son up. I know one BIG advantage - the soothing sound of the ocean beautifully masks the sound of storms - our little guy has never awaken scared of thunder or lightning - works like a charm. Sweet Dreams, S.

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E.T.

answers from Washington DC on

I don't think 3 times in a night is a lot of wakeups, but I think 8 really is. I co-sleep and while some nights are a lot better than others, if my daughter was consistently waking 8 times in a night I would be looking to change up the sleeping circumstances.

Is your child thirsty? Is the room the right temperature? Is the air too dry?

We just bought a humidifier and it has really improved our daughter's sleep routine.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

I did the same with my daughter at about a year, and it takes a while. Old habits die hard, and he probably just needs to get used to waking up throughout the night with out you around. Eventually it seemed it was less and less upsetting for her to wake up alone, and at 17 months I still need to go to her maybe one every few weeks to calm her back down to sleep.

I think it sounds like you are doing well. Soon enough he'll get to a point where you will realize that he is actually becoming more awake when you come in to help him. Then it will be much easier to stay out and let him get back to sleep on his own.

Good luck and in the mean time, if possible, try to take a nap when he does!

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Wow. 3-8 times a night is quite a lot for any age. Has he been to the dr. lately? Perhaps he has an earache or tummy ache that keeps waking him.

If that doesn't seem to be the case, perhaps you could put a sound machine or something in his room for him to listen to so that the room isn't so quiet.

M.

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S.W.

answers from Boston on

Hello S.. I just wanted to say that I think he is doing great. Were you all co sleeping? because if you were than just stick it out. Look he is use to you being right there and that is all he knows and it takes some getting use to. 9 days is not that long. I don't know if you have read the no cry sleep solution book but they say in there that it take something like 140 days. Just the fact that he is sleeping by himself and you just have to go in and remind him that he needs to go back to sleep should be a blessing. Remember this is only a short while and this too shall pass. Just give it some time. He will get there. Also in the no cry sleep solution book they say that no baby really sleeps all the way through the night until they are 2. Just keep up the great work.

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K.H.

answers from Dover on

He is 1, so I would say he is doing great. Both my girls woke up a lot as well during the night for some time, before they would just roll back over and get to sleep on their own, without seeking me out. I would say it is normal. Just stick with what you are doing, and I am sure he will progress more. However, maybe he isn't ready to be without mommy at night. My littlest one is 3, and I have gotten her to go to sleep on her own at bedtime, but she knows that if she wakes up during the night, she can come to me and crawl in my bed...and it will be so for a while longer, before I feel that she is too old. Be glad he is going to bed by himself! That is great!

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