Children Repeating I Love You Several Times a Day

Updated on February 13, 2007
T.V. asks from Mira Loma, CA
15 answers

I wonder if I am worried for simply nothing. My 4 yr old son tells me he loves me at least 30 + times a day. I have noticed he does this more when he is nervous or excited. Don't get me wrong I love it but I worry because I am a single parent

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answers from Phoenix on

both of mine do it throughout the whole grocery store every time we go. and everywhere else but very annoying in the store. they ride on one of those car-carts and say it over and over and over again to me. I love it but sometimes you just want to put a sock in there mouths. I totally understand. By the way. nothing to worrie about. and suck it up now while it's happening because soon he will be 14 and you wont hear it again until he's a dad.

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answers from Sacramento on

I have a 4 year old also and she does the same thing......sometimes she'll call me from another room and when I answer she'll say "I love you". I think she does it just to be sure I'm still hear my voice. I wouldn't worry.

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answers from Portland on

Awwwww! It sounds like he might either need your love or want to give it to you because he sees how much you might need it. I don't see anything wrong with it, but there could be underlying reasons that you might want to address. Spend special time with him. Maybe go out to McDonald's or to the library and read him books. Also, if he is seeing you hurt or hearing you talk about negative or sad things, you might want to take those things into a private room so he does not hear them or see it. Children are very sensitive to these things and I have took many take it to the bedroom. :)

I have a 2 year old that only says I love you if you prompt her to. Argh! But, when she does, it is soooo sweet!

Good luck and I hope the best for you and your family!

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answers from Seattle on


I wouldn't worry too much about it. My four year old does a rather similar thing (only about 10 or 15 times a day), and I'm a married SAHM. I think that at this age, even though they crave independence, they still want to feel connected to the most important people in their lives. He knows what he feels, but doesn't have the language to express it fully just yet. With you being a single mom, your son may just want to make sure that you don't "go away" for whatever reason, and believes that if he tells you he loves you, you won't dissapear on him.

All in all, it's most likely a phase that he's going through. Just keep answering him in kind. And even work in some reassurance like "I know you do, sweetie. And I'll always love you." (My son enjoys that one). Let him know that his place with you is secure and he'll get through this phase just fine.

My best to you!

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answers from Seattle on

Hi T., I am a 37yr old single mother of a 4yr old son. He does the exact same thing!!! So maybe it is an age thing. One minute he is pushing me to the limit and then with a flick of a switch "I love you mommy." I seriously don't think it is anything to worry about. I just tell him i love him too. ( Even though i am thinking "okay enough already!" LOL) I don't think it has anything to do with being a single parent. In fact my son doesn't even remember his father and i being together when he was 2yrs old. He sees his father on a regular basis and for him this is just how life is. He doesn't know any different. Boys love there mothers... take it and run with it because i am sure in a few years we may have a hard time getting them to even hug us! LOL.

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answers from Seattle on

My 6 year old still does this. He is a much more sensitive child than my 12 year old so it worried me greatly at first. When it first started happening I assumed and had been told by others it was because his father was not around and he was reassuring himself that I would not leave as well. I have learned that he is just an expressive little boy and very much a mama's boy. Honestly, it can get very annoying at times but I have learned to tune some of it out so I don't go crazy.



answers from Seattle on

Hi T.,
I am a single parent too. My son does the same thing. It happens less now than it did when he was younger. He is almost 7. He still says "mom I just love you" a lot and when he gets nervous in a situation that he is not used to he says it more often. I think it is just a re-assurance for him. I think the best we can do is re-assure them that we are there for them that we are not going anywhere and help them feel more confident.

My ex has not seen our son since July and that was for only 2 weeks. We live in another state. These nervous times seem to increase before and then after he sees his dad. I think its the inconsistency in the visits that causes some of the nervousness. I think even though he does not even realize it, that he is afraid that I will go away too.

There are times I feel bad that we could not stay together for our son. But I think things would have been worse for him had we tried. Each day he seems more and more confident. More than I ever was. Just continue to let him know you love him too, maybe an extra hug to give that sense of security. It will be ok. Good luck

Re-assurance is key. From both parents if they can get it but since we are the once that are in their lives more on a day to day basis we need to provide it to them...Time and patience.



answers from Los Angeles on

All I can say is...You lucky dog! I am lucky if I can get my daughter to say it to me once let alone offer kisses or hugs. He's just learning that his feelings can be validated. Take it while you can. When that catepillar cocoons up to become a butterfly (adult) he won't offer as much love as he does now.



answers from Los Angeles on

we have 4 boys and the tell all us alot 2. sometimes i think that its just they want to have something to say.



answers from Eugene on

I'm confused...why would you be worried about your child telling you he loves you a lot just because you are a single parent?



answers from Las Vegas on

I don’t think you should be worry... my son always said "Thank You Mom" I love you" it is nothing wrong with that even right now I am reading a book about how to teach your kids good behavior and manners and it says teach your kids how to said "I love you" at all the times specially at bed time isn’t wonderful? that I don’t have to teach him he already says I love you all the time.
I think is sweet!!
Take care



answers from San Diego on

Hi T., I don't really have an answer for your request but I do have a thank you for bringing this subject up, for some unknown reason, as mother's we tend to think we are the only ones going thru a specific situation, that is why these sites are an awesome tool for us, today is my first visit to mamasource and already I've found great help.
I have 3 boys ages 10,12 and 17, the youngest is constantly hugging me and telling me he love's me, and although it is great, it got to a point where more than making me smile, hug him back or say I love you too, I wanted to scream! Now don't take me wrong, I love my boys to death and I couldn't imagine my life without them, reading the responses you received I now realize that his actions are probably more about his insecurites than him wanting to tell me how much he loves me, I hope I haven't done any damage and I will definitely be more tolerant and happy about getting his I love you's and hugs!
btw my 17 year old still hugs me and kisses me in front of his friends : ) so I know I'm doing something right! LOL



answers from Stockton on

Take it and run with it.. My 3yr old does it all day every day to the point that the other 3 girls get annoyed.. It happens. He truly loves you and learn to tune it out after a while. But embrace it now cause when they turn 13 you will rarely hear it.. Its really ok.. Give him hugs, snuggles and tell him "I love you more i won" and then it will be a game and he will lessin..



answers from Bakersfield on

Hi know what this reminds me of? When you tell a kid something and they say why? you say because, and they say why? they can say why until you want to hurt 'em!! :) I would just enjoy it while you can. soon, he's going to fight with you about kisses, hugs, and saying i love you. you'll take him to school and say i love you....he darts his head around looking for his friends and say...gosh, mom. not in front of the guys!! lol. I'm 99% sure this is a phase and there is nothing to worry about. my son is only 16 months old and he can'tsay i love you yet. I can't wait till I get to hear his sweet little voice saying it! Just enjoy it T.. Best Wishes to you and your loving family, T.



answers from Las Vegas on

Children aren't apable of understanding the difference between love and like until around 3.5 or 4. He is probably now discovering this new emotion and what it means. Just be sure to acknowledge him EVERY time and reassure him that you feel the same. :) That will help him to be open about all his other emotions as he discovers them. Also try telling him about other ways of expressing his love. Like "I make you your favorite sandwiches because I love you." I drive you to the park to play because I love you." "I go to work so we can have food because I love you." He'll learn to show his love as well as say it. :)

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