Child Refuses to Sit in Stroller or High Chair

sometimes nothing seems to work. suggestion, no food unless setting, when he gets up take what ever it is away. I think all small children thing they should not set in a stroller. I'm a grand parent of two girls and at three yrs. one still has to set in a stroller if going to the mall or walk along holding. its a safety issue. i always take a toy and keep snacks and food. keeps them busy. Children never liked shopping. i do believe the more they are taken out the better they are. maybe setting while he is in the hi chair may work. i always thought the car seat would wish you never had children, due to the conf. of children and screams. my oldest is 29 and when she misbehaved in a public place she was taken to a bathroom and punished. she now does that with her girls and this still works.

Sounds familiar! It's just a phase I'm sure...could be a month or two of it, but I assume he is just so thrilled with walking and exploring that the last thing he wants is to be strapped down. My daughter was the same way...I was a little embarassed by it--mostly when she wouldn't sit still at library story time! However, at 18 months, she's fine now. Maybe try ignoring his behavior and distracting him with a song or a toy. This too shall pass!

K.,

I'm finding that I hold my youngest a lot, and have her on the floor a lot. She LOVES the highchair because she knows it means she's gonna eat right away, and she LOVES the stroller cause we hardly ever put her in one (we either hold her or put her in a sling), and we always have several toys to rotate for her when she is in the stroller.

As soon as I put her in the highchair I give her something she can feed herself (while I'm getting her food ready) such as cheerios, and whenever I'm done feeding her, I take her out. I noticed that if I let my other girls stay in the highchair too long when they were about a year old they would fuss, and then the next time I'd put them in they'd fight it because they knew that they had a lousy time in there previously.

Maybe give him a little break from those things. Also, keep in mind it has become routine for him that when he sees the highchair/stroller, that it is his cue to struggle. For instance, since he already has a dis-like for the high chair, why don't you just feed him without it for a few days, and then maybe he'd be a little less fussy next time he's in there.

You could also try to reduce the time he is in a high chair or stroller, and reduce the frequency of putting him in them.

Hope those suggestions are helpful.

Rebecca

I had the same problems. With the high chair, figure out what you want more, for the kiddo to eat or sit. I had a high chair that could be lowered, and lowered it so my daughter could stand and eat. By giving her the option, she sometimes did that and sometimes sat. Then we moved her to a kid size table and chair, and sitting in kid chair was a treat for her. Not only did she sit and eat, but it made it really easy to transition to the booster at the big table. The stroller is tough....I started walking and had to fight this battle everytime. I just brought tons of snacks and toys/books that could only be played with if sitting. No matter what....remember it is only a phase and you will look back at this and laugh......someday :-)

You just have to keep reminding yourself and him who is in charge. Walking/playing and eating is not an option. If he chokes and starts running or flopping around, would you know the difference? When it is time to eat, be firm about it. If he wishes to play instead, put the food away. It wont take long before he realizes whats going on. Have you tried giving him a special plate to eat off of, and when he is not behaving he cannot eat off that special plate? Then try the special plate again at the next meal.

As a parent, your not going to let him starve but if you dont nip it now, it will only get worse. How he acts with meal time at home will carry outside the home because that is all he knows. I have a girlfriend who let her son do what he wished because it was cute. I went to her house and about died when we ordered pizza and he ran with two slices on a glass plate to the bedroom, dropping one on the way and leaving it on the floor. At that time he was 3. He is now 5, nothing has changed. He has lost snack time at the babysitters and he is not phased because when he gets home, instead of her taking the snack and putting it up for tomorrow, she gives it to him. I will not go out and eat with her if she brings him along. Its way too embarrassing.

I am not being harsh at all. I am a mother of 3 boys who are now 20, 17, 14. Just wait until the burping starts.

I would say be consistent if you don't want that behavior to continue. Choose your battles but stick with the ones you do pick. If you don't want him to get out of his highchair, tighten the straps, put the tray in so he can't get out and don't feed him on the go. Make it clear he won't get food any other place. He at one can understand this. If he screams and you don't want to hear it, explain that he won't get food unless he sits and stops screaming. Keep trying. One thing my sister once told me is, if you loose patient and yell first, they have won. Be calm, firm and consistent. I have a 4 year old and 10 month old and follow through has been the main thing. Don't say no to something unless you're willing to actually follow through with it. Another thing I've found is one of those booster chairs that strap to the seat of a chair work better with toddlers. The tray is closer to them so they can't get out with the tray on and they feel like they're "Bigger".
Good luck and remember you do have a very normal child. He'll continue to test the limits the rest of his life!!! :)

Just say "Thank God". Your baby has energy and it's a sign of good health. I would be worried if you had said that you baby is always calm and morose. You will exercise more running after him and it's good for you too. Just make sure that table cloth is not pending while something hot is on the table, etc.
May your baby grows that healthy !

That is pretty normal at that age, especially with a boy. When my sons were that age, I took the stroller with me, and when I let them out to walk, I told them they had to hold the stroller. Of course they would start to wander, and I'd say "Quick! Quick! Where's the stroller?" and they would run back to grab the stroller. If that didn't work, then I'd put them back in, they'd scream, and I'd tell them they can get back out but they have to hold the stroller. No holding stroller, no walking. It takes a lot of patience and repeating, but eventually he will do it.

K., regarding the stroller (and car seat) resistance, try more distractions and things to make those places special for him. Do you keep baby-friendly books and toys in the stroller all the time? Some books and toys that he's never seen before can help him stay occupied in the stroller for a while at least. You might get the kinds of toys (and they have books like this too) that can be tethered to the stroller so when he inevitably tosses them out, they don't hit the floor! Toys that he gets to manipulate like might be more interesting for longer than plain soft toys like stuffed animals. My daughter loved looking at books in her stroller and even had some books that were "stroller books" she could only see when in the stroller, so they were something special to look forward to. Also, just ignoring any stroller or car seat fusses may help after a while -- once he realizes he's staying put, and fussing for attention won't get him any, he might turn to those books and toys.

I tied my son's shoelaces together so he couldn't climb out. I tried to have him eat as much as possible in the highchair without wandering and eating but I also realized toddlers are on the go and did let him eat out of his highchair as well. You may have some screaming on your walks in the stroller at first but with consistency -- he'll eventually give in and enjoy his walks!

I had the same problem and can reassure you that it will get better with time. My daughter is now 21 months old and still struggles with the car seat and stroller 90% of the time, very rarely with the high chair. I agree with the previous responders who said you must stand your ground. It is too dangerous to eat while moving, and it is too dangerous to run around the mall, supermarket, or outdoors at this age.

One thing I did that worked VERY well for me. When the fit would start, I would say in a slightly louder more emphatic voice, "You Want to Get Down! You don't Want to Sit! You want to Walk!" and she would instantly quiet down and say Yes. Then I would explain that I understood she wanted to get down and would be able to as soon as she was done eating (or I was done shopping, or as soon as we were indoors, etc. You get the idea). That seemed to calm her down, realizing that this was not a life sentence and that I did in fact understand and sympathize with her.

Take a breather, I know, it's frustrating. Most 1 yr olds are VERY Active and don't like being con/restrained, especially those who've mastered crawling or walking. Offer a reward (small, quiet toy or a game of peek-a-boo, healthy foods he likes during meals or something sweet after the meal, short trip, etc.) for sitting still (or not trying to get out) even shortly, or a distraction, a toy or cherished item he likes while sitting. Make him feel calm relaxed w/no TV, radio, or other noises that he may find interesting while eating, strolling around. If he likes you to rub his head/hair or play 'this little piggy,' do so occasionally during the meal or short trip. Find ways to make the space (high chair, stroller, etc.) attractive with something he likes. Most of all, relax, be patient. The more uptight you are, the baby will match your frustration (and vice versa). Talk to him calmly while putting him in, make up a song to make it fun. Make a game of it! Take breaks (2min in, 2min out, etc. if at all possible). Do what he can stand and gradually increase it. If this is your first child, you may not realize that the 30 or so minutes you and hubby are used to at the dinner table or casual stroll is not the same for a 0ne-year old, yet. The rewards will keep him interested. Don't make the restraints too tight as these could hurt him. If you feel he's way too active than what's expected, check w/your doctor. Maybe he's not getting enough sleep, is too stimulated, or has other developmental concerns although I HIGHLY DOUBT IT if all else is OK. Best of luck. I hope it works out!

This is normal! Most kids go thru phases! One minute they can't stand something and before you know it, they're doing or eating the very thing they couldn't tolerate (and vice versa)! I bet he'll grow into tolerating the high chair, stroller to SOME degree over a short time.