Child Custody Question - Grandview,MO

Updated on May 31, 2018
T.H. asks from Grandview, MO
9 answers

So me and my child’s father have joint custody of our child but she primarily lives with him recently he and his wife filed for separation and he left my daughter there with his wife his soon to be ex-wife and moved in with his girlfriend and now he wants to move my daughter away from her stepmom and in with his him and his new girlfriend is there anything I can do to stop it

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

He sounds unstable.

Your child deserves a stable life.

Can you give this to her? Talk to a lawyer and figure out the best move for your daughters sake.

It's not fair for her to be shuffled like new luggage. Get help for her.

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D.B.

answers from Boston on

If he has primary custody but didn't take his child with him, that sound pretty neglectful to me. I realize your daughter was used to and perhaps close to her stepmother, but your ex had no business leaving the child with a non-custodial parent - at least not without talking to you.

My concern is that he is going from one home/woman to another, and that means introducing your daughter to yet another person he may well split up from. That's unstable living for your daughter.

If you have any texts or emails from him, collect and print them out. If you have any other documentation, collect it as well. If the stepmother had you pick the child up for visitation, for example, write down the dates and times. If you have a phone record of her calling you in your "recent calls" log on your phone, take a screen shot of that too. Put all of this together in one folder and talk to a lawyer. If you don't have a lawyer (and I think you should get one), you can go to the court where your visitation/custody agreement was filed and talk to a court clerk about filing a modification order. That's if you can take custody of your daughter. I don't know what your history is or your current circumstances, but your ex shuttling your daughter from one home to the next and always introducing a new woman isn't good. He's not going to look good to a court at this point. If you can take custody, remember that he will have to pay you child support. You're going to have to do this with some objective advice though, not through talking to him.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Talk to your lawyer about modifying the custody agreement.
His life doesn't sound very stable right now.
If you can offer more stability then she should live with you and visit him rather than the other way around.
If you can't - then there's not much you can do.

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N.A.

answers from San Diego on

The Father is an absentee custodial parent. By moving out...literally leaving your daughter to live with a 3rd party
This appear to be abandonment and a significant change in circumstances.
Stepmother is a 3rd party you are the Mother.

If a parent isn’t even around to care for the child during thier parenting time that’s not parenting, it’s physical, emotional, educational neglect. Yes, it is an incredibly unstable home environment.

I bet Father use the stepmother as his personal glorified babysitters now he moved out and left your child with her, this is ridiculous.

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J.B.

answers from Boston on

Yes. The best course of action would be to hire an attorney to file a complaint for modification of your agreement. How old is your child? What would be the idea scenario here? Can you handle full custody (would it interfere with work, school, transportation)? If you do that, he can have parenting time that has conditions like no overnights with his girlfriend there, etc. Does she want to continue to have a relationship with her step-mother? If so, there might not be a way to take care of that legally (she has no rights) but you can facilitate a continued relationship with her step-mother if both parties want that and it's beneficial.

What a mess this guy made...he has a right and responsibility to have a continued relationship with his daughter, but she has a right to be protected from his impulsiveness and bad decisions. Get an order in place that suits the current situation (full custody for you, parenting time for him) and when he sorts his mess out, he can file a complaint to regain shared custody. But your daughter doesn't have to be bounced around from house to house with the flavor-of-the-month girlfriend.

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N.K.

answers from Miami on

Why would you want him to continue having custody of her when he is jumping from woman to woman and leaving the child behind for someone else to care of? He should have brought her back to you, instead of leaving her with his ex-wife without your knowledge, and now he wants to move in with someone else and bring your daughter into that mess? Sounds very unstable. You need to regain full custody unless you don't mind your child being abandoned with an ex as he jumps to the new flavor of the month, or for your child to see a parade of women entering and leaving her life. This is only going to affect her own psychological well-being as she grows up. You need to have your lawyer petition the judge for full custody based on his actions, or have someone else share custody, if the issue is that you are unable to care for her all on your own. Maybe his mother or father, a sibling or your own parents can help out with that?

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

depends largely on your custody agreement, doesn't it?

are you in a position for her to live with you?

how old is your daughter?

does his ex WANT your daughter to live with her?

his instability and abandonment of the child to a non-custodial parent don't speak well for him. i'm betting a judge would agree.

but only if you're a better bet. there's very little info here about that aspect.
khairete
S.

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

What do you think is best for your daughter? You need to consult with an attorney or perhaps a child advocate. It sounds like your ex abandoned your daughter.

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H.P.

answers from York on

Does your state give any consideration to what your child wants, who she wants to live with ? Also, depending on age and how long child's father was married and had custody, the step-mother could have strong feelings for the child and want to at least retain some sort of visitation with whoever has custody. I would suggest that be you if you can manage, if your lifestyle can accommodate her needs, close to here school, etc. With your ex moving on, this would be the third woman in your child's life and he needs to be aware that this is a person he is moving back and forth, not a bag to be dragged behind him.

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