Child Behind on Development

Updated on March 17, 2008
S.T. asks from Phoenix, AZ
6 answers

Ok, so the daycare my son goes to they want to stick him back in the 2yr old because hes not potty trained. Can they do that even if he is behind on his development like his motor skills. I think that may be why hes slow at any advice would be appreciated.

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So What Happened?

He is still in the 3yr old room, they did not move him over. The public school and daycare are trying to help him in potty training. Everything has been really good.

More Answers



answers from Phoenix on

don't take it personally. each room has its specialized staff with a certain job description and you shouldn't feel slighted, it would rather be unfair for your child to be put in a room with others that are already potty trained, rules are rules, after all. besides, i'm sure you wouldn't want your child to be the *only one* not potty trained in the entire classroom and have to hear comments from other kids because "he's stinky" or still wears a diaper, etc. you don't want him to be embarassed every time he needs to be taken for a change. if he really wants to be in the other class this could encourage him with the potty training. (i have a son with autism (now 18) so i can say this without any bias and understanding how you feel, i've learned sometimes you need to do what is asked of you, and other times you need to fight for things. i would consider what it is you are fighting for right now, the benefits may not be as ample as you think) it is important for EVERY child to feel succesful and proud of himself, and you wouldn't want him to feel less than the other kids.
have a great day~

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Phoenix on

The most important question is do YOU think your son in "developmentally slow"? Does his pediatrician think he is? Potty training is not an indicator of development, becaue every child is different. I would talk with your doctor if you have any concerns about his development. If there are no concens then maybe the problem is with your daycare center and you should look for a better place. If there is concern, then I agree with the mom who suggested that you contact your school district for evaluation and assistance. Simply placing him back into a two year old class in not going to help him. And I'm sure that the three year olds will have their share of potty 'accidents' as well. Most of all, follow your instincts and do what your think is best for your child.



answers from Flagstaff on

I would have him checked to make sure he is slow with his motor skills. I don't feel it is good for a child to be put in a younger group because of it, you will see him degress in everything if they end up doing this and you don't want that.



answers from Albuquerque on

Hello S.,
If you are here from Rio Rancho, you could take your son to Shining Star Preschool, they do an evaluation on the children and they will put him in a class that is appropriate for him. My grandson was slow and they did wonders for him. I would call the school for more info.



answers from Phoenix on

Hi S.- I worked with children birth to three in the AzEIP (Arizona Early Intervention Program) who were developmenally delayed. Once a child turned three, we transitioned them to the school district for evaluation if they still needed some help in one or more developmental area. If you believe your son is behind developmentally, you can contact your school district and ask them to do an evaluation. They are required by the state to provide therapy if in fact the child is not within a normal range in any of the developmenal areas. Dysart has an entire preschool for kids who qualify. They also have spots for "typical" peers for a small price (well, smaller than most daycares). If you have any more questions, I would be happy to try to answer them or help you find info on having your son evaluated. Good luck.



answers from Phoenix on

Hi S.,

I agree with the other mom about the potty training rule. However, have you thought about taking your child to an in-home day care where the children are not segregated by age? My child seems "normal" in most respects and yet was not 100% potty trained at 3. The in-home daycare I took him to as an infant/toddler had preschool for 3's-5's and let my son participate in the activities as he was able such as coloring, painting, learning letters (writing and sounds), etc. well before he was 3.

I personally preferred the "family" in-home daycare setting over public segregated daycares. I had my son with two different in-home caregivers. I was able to get to know his caregivers and their families plus my son was exposed to babies through teenagers. Being around older kids seemed to motivate my son to use the potty, eat with utensils & with manners, etc. more so when he was attending than when he was not (summers off) as well as be around babies/younger children. Also, he was able to play with the family pets, go swimming/take swim lessons, go outside or stay inside AND I was able to provide or insist on a special diet.

Anyhow, just a thought.

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