Chastising/Disciplining Kids on Facebook

I agree with you.

My 19 yr. old SS posted the word Hell on his FB page, as in "I am having one hell of a day" and his Grandma (stepfather's mother) chewed him a good one. It was awful and way out of line. He is an adult for crying out loud. But his mom's side and stepfather's side are all very serious LDS people and are very down on the inappropriate behavior and call him on it all the time, not just language, his music and movie choices too.

I think it is wrong.

~A time and a place for everything...

Are the moms and grandmas 15 and 25?
I think the appropriate response to a minor cursing on FB is to delete the account.

On a positive note, at least these parents are monitoring the child's FB page. However, I am not a believer in "publicly" disciplining my child. My parents never did it to me and I will not do it to my child- if you don't respect your children they won't respect you either!

If the parent was unhappy with a posting, then they should go into the child's room or call on the cell and insist that the posting be taken down in the next 5 minutes and then check to make sure it was done. If not- no phone and no computer.

Unfortunately, teens don't understand that FB isn't "private" and that future employers can and will check their pages, status updates and pictures. Whether they like it or not, their FB page will very soon be as important as a resume in painting a picture of who they are as a person.

So, would I chastise my child on FB? No, but I would do exactly what you have done and insist that my child maintain a "respectable" profile that sends the right message about who he is!

If the child knew better than to curse, they shouldn't have done it 1- at all, and 2- where mom and grandma could see! You do the crime, you do the time; in this case the 'time' being called out publically.

I know for a fact that my friends do this with their children on facebook, and they have actually asked me that if I see anything inappropriate to call them out on it in front of their freinds. Tough lesson learned, but a lesson all the same.

For some kids, the embarrassment is reason enough to do a 180 and correct the behavior. Same as verbally disciplining a child in a busy store or in their classroom; I'll say what I have to say about the negative behavior regardless of who is witnessing it. If my daughter was running through the house at her own birthday party, I would still remind her that she knows the rules, she's breaking the rules, time out!

Good question, I'm interested in reading what others have to say :)

I try VERY hard NOT to demean anyone on a public forum. ESPECIALLY family.

When a teenager is going off or on and on about things - I do inbox them and let them know that this is NOT the way to handle the situation....

Publicly humiliating a child, whether it's infront of their friends at school, in the gorcery store, or on FAcebook, is never a good thing to do.

I'm w/ you.
A while back I was "friends" w/ a teenage cousin of mine on FB, and was embarrassed by her trashy talk. So feeling if it were my daughter doing the same I would want to know...I told her mom.
Knowing her mom-maybe she didn't care-but she has tons of our huge family as friends and she should care. It's tasteless.
Anyhow my cousin de-friended me. =...( (JK-ing) And now I will never know if she cleaned up her act...

That being said I have some adult friends who need their mommies to discipline THEM on FB. Lol.
I am always amazed at what some ppl share w/ the world.

Keep personal arguements/squabbles off FB! :)

In today's world, kids communicate mostly via electronics. That's how they talk to each other. My friend once took her son and his friend to a game, and they were texting each other....while sitting in the car right next to each other. Anyway, my son knows I expect his behavior to be the same no matter where he is. If he is gonna air his dirty laundry online, then I am gonna tell him it stinks. That is my job as his parent. As far as FB is concerned, my job is to teach him to represent himself and the God he believes in, even in the relative obscurity of social networking. People can and have lost jobs based on what they have on their FB account. So, I feel I need to give him the accountability to help him make good choices.

And really, even my Mom chastises me on FB if I am crossing the line and showing a poor attitude. I don't like it, but she is always right and I know she does it from love.

I associate this with growing up in a small town. One time my Mom made the mistake of saying something to one of her peers about something. It got twisted around and back to me through a teachers lecture to the class. I felt so let down. I also have an FB friend who is very publicly upset with her children right now. It makes me VERY uncomfortable. I feel like she is betraying her children in a way. I can understand she's upset and may have very good reason but to rant about them on FB seems so wrong.

I'm with you; not a big fan of public humiliation. Whether that's in real life (my son's only 8, but if I need to 'have words' I don't do it in front of his friends... but call him away) or online (my son's been reading/writing since 3... I don't jump into email threads, though I HAVE on occasion made him apologize).

I know I am 1 of only a handful, but I don't see a problem with that. If the child wants to act grown enough to go and put their business out there, then she should be able to take the backlash from mom and grandma. I personally don't think children under a certain age should have Facebook or MySpace or any of the social networking accounts.
My husbands niece is 16 and has nearly 500 friends on fb and I know she doesn't know even half of her fb "friends". She has a nasty potty mouth on there, as do most of her friends, and has several pics of herself flipping the bird. She puts all kinds of family business on there. My own niece, also 16, has taken a habit of blurting out family business on fb. I have commented on her status before and let her know what she's telling the world is very inappropriate and should be kept at home.
It may seem wrong, but the fact of the matter is, if this child wants to be disrespectful in such a public manner, then either she needs to be put in her place, or taken off the computer altogether.

I don't think discipline belongs on FB. I have teenagers - and they are on FB. They must friend us so that we can monitor posts. I never comment on things I don't agree with or feel are inappropriate - we discuss it. I find that teens tend to air their "dirty laundry" on FB and I'm trying to teach my boys that it is inappropriate to do so. So if I post stuff like that on theirs - what would they learn! They would learn that its okay to do so to others!

Well, since you said you want to different opinions........

I don't believe that children should be publicly reprimanded. But then, I don't believe children should be on Face Book, either.

Most parents these days have the "all their friends are doing it" philosophy. I'm so thankful that I grew up with the "if your friends were jumping off a cliff, would you do it, too?" philosophy. I am raising my children to be independent thinkers, also.

I agree with you. I think its easier in general to avoid confrontation/discipline in the face to face aspect. I see it all the time with my neighbor kids, but the mom usually razzes them in a playful way. I have deleted my own mother due to similar instances, we talked about it and added her back.

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