Breastfeeding Shortcuts?

A happy mother is a good mother - and if you don't like breastfeeding - then you simply should not do it. I am an OB nurse and a mother who breastfed - but I know it is not for everyone and there should be no judgement on that.

Doiing what is best for you - will be best for your baby in the long run. Formula is an excellent alternative - though I would expect you to get a lot of people who will disagree on this one...

Best of luck!

Breastfeeding is hard. I feel like too few people tell you that. So DON'T feel bad about yourself for finding it hard! It's really confining, and at times you feel like a cow instead of a person--I clearly remember sitting there, nursing, adamantly explaining to my (2 mo old!) daughter all of the fine talents and abilities I have aside from lactating, just to remind MYSELF that there was more to me than being a milk machine!! I second a lot of the advice you've gotten--every baby is different, so see how this one goes. DD fed for a full hour, every 3 hours, like clockwork--that's 8 hours per day with a baby at the breast, in case you're counting (and I was!!). I'm currently 37 wks pg with #2, and praying I get one of those 20-minutes-and-done feeders. That being said, I also had a clear "mom is not a pacifier" rule with DD--and I know some moms are horrified by this, but I DID give DD a pacifier when I was pretty sure she just wanted comfort, not food. When she was a bit older, we also used the paci to train her to go longer btw feedings--so, for instance, at 6 mos, when we knew she could go 8-10 hours, if she woke up at 3am, DH would go in and give her a paci--no more middle of the night feedings for her. Finally, please know that BF'ing vs. formula is NOT an either-or thing--this is another part that I feel people never talk about enough. Starting at 10 weeks, DD got both--DH gave her formula for her midnight feeding, I BF'ed at 5 am, so both DH and I could get decent sleep, albeit at different times. Your body and your baby will adjust to whatever schedule you establish--so, for instance, when I went back to work full time at 9 mos, I would BF before and after work, but didn't pump at work anymore (the amount I was getting was clearly not worth the time and trouble). So DD got breastmilk twice a day, otherwise formula, and that was fine. Play it by ear and find the system that works best for you--breastfeeding is great healthwise for both baby and mom, but sanity is important, too, so you have to find what works for you, and don't let others make you feel guilty! GL!

Kudos to you for being open and honest with your question! What wonderful advice and support you have already received!

As someone who was unable to make enough milk for my babies (it was also true for my grandmother and mother), breastfeeding was the worst challenge of being a new mother! I felt like I was pumping any time I wasn't attempting to nurse! I felt like I had the unhappiest babies in the world because they were not getting enough to feel full, and they would get frustrated with the supplemental nursing system thingamajigger. I *finally* had a real, genuine, amazing, human being of a lactation nurse who sat me down and was honest with me about why she thought I might just need to switch to formula. It was so great to have another woman's "approval" to let go of the breastfeeding notion, and make my child happy by finally being full!

Of course, there were people in my life who questioned my move to formula after 6 weeks of torturing myself trying to nurse (with both of my children)... but I had to learn to let it go and if they were not able to, then I had to let go of them as well.

You will do what's right for your baby, and what's right for you. It only works for everyone if you do both!

Hugs to you! That must have been tough. I would say play it by ear. Each baby is different, so you may not have this issue at all and end up loving it the 2nd time around. If you can find a lactation consultant in your area, do that - they may be able to help you with your fears and work with you to make the 2nd experience more positive. Also, if you're able to buy a chair that's comfortable for your poor tailbone area, or perhaps a special cushion to make the sitting down breastfeeding more comfortable, that might help a LOT. And I'm guessing the chair would be good in general for you even after you're done breastfeeding - treat yourself to something that will help you be comfortable in the long run.

Take care and good luck.

I had issues with my kids latching, so I pumped (i had enough milk for 4 babies). I just couldn't waste it...It become so much of a burdon, my baby would wake up every couple hours, I would feed her and get her back to bed, then out to the living room to pump. It was short of a nightmare for 3 months. I would be so frustrated feeding and changing the baby, hurry hurry so I could pump type thing that I was racked with guilt. I talked to my doctor about it and he gave me the best piece of advice: He said when it becomes more about the chore of breastfeeding/pumping and less about bonding and nurturing your child, its time to give it up. So, I did. I know a lot of moms will say that was crazy advice, but its what I needed to hear. I gave her 4 good months of breastmilk, and she is a thriving 5 year old.
My son was better at latching but not great (I dont have the best equipment), but the shields really help. Except that I had so much milk that nursing him made a huge mess. It was so frustrating. I pumped and fed him for 3 1/2 months and he is a thriving almost 3 year old boy.
Yes-breast milk is the best most natural nurishment for your child.
But-overall health and well-being of both you and your child is whats most important.
You have to decide what is right for you and ignore as much as you can of the judgementors out there. If you choose to breastfeed again, maybe talk with your lactation specialist about working towards longer feedings with more time inbetween. It seems like the idea of it completely consuming your life is the real issue. Plus you will have another child to tend to as well. breastfeeding can be a great time for all of you, but it can also turn stressful without the proper planning in place. Best of luck to you!

I completely understand being apprehensive about breastfeeding. But, if you feed your baby a bottle, you'll still be tied down. You have to sit and feed the baby the bottle, just like if you're nursing. I would set up a nursing station. Pick your favorite chair. Get some magazines, a good book you've been wanting to read, a drink, a snack, the TV Remote, etc. The time goes so much faster if you're busy.
Also, just because your first nursed all the time doesn't mean your second will. I've nursed both my daughters and the experiences aren't the same. My first daughter nursed non-stop night and day. My second is much more spaced out and she nurses for longer amounts of time.

This is totally your choice, and I agree I never felt like breastfeeding was as fabulous as other moms did. I gave up all four times, and the only reason I felt guilty is because I was afraid other moms would judge me for giving my child a bottle. I just am not into it. I have four healthy, happy children. They are the same as any other kid out there, regardless of what they were fed the first year. I know it s best, but it is not best for me. The decision is completely yours and yours alone, so let it go and just feed your baby whichever way you are most comfortable with. But I would suggest trying breastfeeding at first, just so you know for sure if you really don't want to do it, because you do not get a second chance.

As far as options other than formula and breastmilk, I'm not sure. But don't let anyone feel bad if you can't breastfeed... I'm a huge advocate for it, but I can also support and respect a womans decision not to, especially if she simply CAN'T. Do what works best for you and baby... if mama aint happy, aint nobody happy! You never know though, having been through it before, this time might be a breeze for you. But even if you can't nurse, or choose not to, don't let anyone make you feel bad for it. As long as baby is happy and gaining weight properly, that's all that's important. Best wishes and congrats on baby #2!!

K so here is my 2 cents :) I'm a firm believer in BF but I also believe that for some woman it just might not be the best thing. Like you with my first it was really hard for me. I had tones of problems like mastitis 4 or 5 times and clogged ducts. I had a baby girl that ate all the time and I felt so tied down! I nursed her until she was a year but I just couldn't wait to stop. But I stuck it out because I believed it was the best thing for her. With my second it was very different. I only got mastitis once and she was a much easier baby, she could go longer between feedings and would take a bottle of pumped milk (which my first NEVER did) if I needed her to. I enjoyed it so much more and actually continued to BF her until she was 13 months! Crazy right? So I guess I'm just saying things may be different with the second. If i were you I would BF for the first few weeks or first month because they do say even a little breast milk is better than nothing and then you could transition her to formula. Or I had a friend who's baby would take both no problem so she only nursed her baby like once or twice during the day and about once a night and then rest of the time he took formula. She liked it that way cause she felt like he was still getting that good breastmilk but she wasn't so tied down. Anyways it's your decision and either way your baby will still be a healthy, happy baby.

What an honest question to share. You're not alone... other mothers feel this way. A couple thoughts. First, all babies are different. You might get one of those "good" babies who eats for 15 minutes and doesn't want to eat again for 3 hours. It does happen! So first, I'd suggest you wait until you see what kind of baby you have. Second, it's important to find a balance so you can enjoy being a mom. There's a book called "Balancing Breast and Bottle: Reaching Your Breastfeeding Goals." It talks about how to find that balance as a mom, including when you add some formula feedings in addition to breastfeeding. It's a balance, and all moms are different. The book's on amazon, and it has a website, too. Hang in there!

Don't feel guilty - you're being totally reasonable. Sounds like the first one was very needy. My first was easy - she fed every 2-4 hrs from birth, and then went longer from there. She was also an efficient eater - 10 min each side max and she was done! The second, little man, took FOREVER to feed. He could spend forever just eating... and with another running around (16 mos difference) it was harder to manage.

Each one is totally different. My advice would be to see how it goes. If the second one latches well etc. Then see how you feel about it once you try. You can always pump (which is somewhat double work, but on your schedule), or go to formula earlier.

My second ended up on formula at 2 mos b/c of some digestive issues. I felt terrible about "stopping" breastfeeding, but he was much happier, healthier and so was I. Do what is right for you and your family. If breastfeeding doesn't work for you - there are plenty of other options and you can bond with a bottle fed baby as well. Take it one step at a time.. and your are right - ENJOY! If you do the baby will be more relaxed and happy too.

Each coupling is different, this little one could be a very different eater then your first. Some babies are grazers and some are very efficient. you won't know what this one is like until they are born. See what happens and then if you don't want to exclusively breastfeed you can work on pumping again (with a LC) or move to formula.

I guess I just want you to know that this one could be a different experience then your first and to see what type of eater they are before making any decisions.

I didn't read any responses so I don't know what anyone else said. But, here is my point of view. If you don't like it again, then don't do it. I HATED breastfeeding and only did it for six weeks with both my kids and then went onto formula. They are both great and healthy kids! And don't feel guilty if you decide it just isn't for you because it isn't for everyone. Just know that it is ok and you are a great mom no matter how you decide to feed your kids. I have loved bottle feeding my kids, it gives me the time to cuddle them and love them just the same and I don't have to feel like a cow in the process. Good luck to you :)

I didn't enjoy breastfeeding like I thought I would, but it was still worth it for *me* that my sons got breastmilk for a long time. I know that *I* would have disliked formula feeding more than breastfeeding.
I'd say wait and see how it goes this time, you can always switch to formula but not the other way around.
My boys were completely different nursers. My milk came in much faster the 2nd time so we got off to a better start there. #1 was a comfort nurser, did the evening cluster feed (I finally made him take a pacifier after 2 straight hours because he just tore me up), woke up every couple hours until we night weaned at 2 years...
#2 only nursed to eat. And once I finally put him in his own room he slept thru the night. He was very efficient and did little nursing for comfort. I was better at it the 2nd time around, too. It was more 2nd nature and easier to do wherever.
My births were quite different from eachother, too. The 2nd was so easy and I really felt great afterwards, not the long slow recovery (physically and mentally) from the 1st.
So, just wait and see! :)
All that said, you can just breastfeed at certain times--what ever are easiest for you, and formula feed the remainder. Might need a pacifier for the comfort sucking times (if it's that kinda baby).
And decide what kind of nursing you want to do. I think that breastfeeding is the best comfort tool and would never give up that aspect of it. Many only want it to be nutrition, that's where all the baby "training" books come in--it's all about having a very set schedule. Personally, that would drive me crazy to follow someone else's schedule anyway and i'd just get frustrated when things like illness/teething/travel messed it up. Besides, I love nothing better than watching a baby fall asleep while nursing. <3
If you do check out Babywise make sure it is the most recent version, the author has gotten a lot of criticism for his info and has made changes with each version (strictly following his earlier versions was leading to failure to thrive). And please ignore his "examples" of how BW worked with others, he takes credit for things that are often just differences between kids.

I feel that breastfeeding is really not just about nutrition - it is a lifestyle choice, and for some people, it simply isn't the right choice. Breastfeeding shouldn't be a chore - it should be something you enjoy. And someone here said it is hard - it can be, but it shouldn't be with the right support.

If you really feel this detached from it (and I am a HUGE advocate of breastfeeding and helping moms succeed) I would nurse him for the first 3 to 4 months, then wean to formula. This way you will at least start him off with the best nutrition possible in the early months and then switch to formula (though I would advocate for donated breastmilk over any formula).

best of luck!

I had to laugh...I think there are no short-cuts when it comes to breastfeeding! It's work, plain and simple. I had an extremely difficult time with my first son, but much easier with both of my other two...so it may be different for you. Give it a try. If it doesn't work for you - don't beat yourself up. Switch to formula and be on with the fine art of motherhood! You will do fine.

Congrats on feeding your 1st for a full year and at least considering it for the second.
Nursing was definitely easier for my second. hope that is encouraging.
If you really feel tied down with nursing have you considered some nursing and some formula when hubby can help feed. i don't think formula will free you up that much if you are still doing all the feedings. Remember with formula you have to mix and then wash bottles. None of that cleanup with nursing.

One really important thing is to make sure your baby gets a FULL FEEDING each time they nurse and don't fall into the habit of snacking. This starts at the beginning by making sure that they stay awake while eating long enough to get a very full belly - not just satisfy their initial hunger. Also it makes sure they get the hindmilk which will also keep them full for longer. If he or she is getting a full feeding then you shouldn't have to feed them as often because they will stay full for longer. By 6 months or so they should be eating every 3 hours or maybe longer depending on the baby. Of course they will go through growth spurts etc where they will need to eat more often but making sure they don't get into the habit of seeing you as a snack bar should help. Good luck and good job in wanting to do this important thing for your little one!

i breastfed too and felt good about it but never felt euphoric about it. i would have gone crazy(ier :P) if my baby ate as much as yours did. congratulations for sticking it out as long as you did!

chances are, it won't happen that way twice. if it does, do whatever it takes to keep yourself sane and feeling good about your baby. everybody will be happier for it.

p.s. i didn't have a very good letdown with the pump either. i tried thinking about my baby but that didn't work. i found a good nipple tweak on the other nipple helped. eventually, like you, the pumping just didn't work anymore but i was exclusively pumping. good luck!

I totally had the same thing with my son who was my first child. I felt tied down and didn't enjoy it. However, both of my girls were totally different! They would nurse and then be done with it for 2-3 hours. They also started sleeping thru the night at a much younger age than he did. So, your next child could be totally different than the first. Also, there is nothing wrong with supplemental formula feeding so that someone else can help out while you get a break. With my 3rd child I did both breast and formula for a few months and she was just fine with it. Mostly breastfed at night because well, it was easier for me to just lay her next to me and I didn't have to make a bottle. :)

I don't want to sound judgmental but this might. . . Parenting is hard and we have to make some sacrifices for our children. I love breastfeeding but it did wear me out when my boys were very little since they wanted it all of the time. I feel that it is the best start and the best nutrition that I can give them so I toughed it out. I don't think that it will be much different having to sit and hold a bottle for a baby. Hopefully this time your tail bone will be fine and the nursing will be a whole new experience for you.

Was your first on any sort of schedule? I know that a lot of moms here don't believe in them, but your question makes me thing that that is what you are looking for. "On Becoming Babywise" is a great book for schedules. The main thought behind it is Eat, Awake, Sleep (you can ignore the rest of the book, if you are just looking for the schedule). This way, the baby eats as soon as waking, then gets some awake time (my son got maybe 15 minutes when he was first born, if I was lucky, but it gradually got longer), and then nap, about 1.5-2 hours. This creates a "feeding schedule" (very loose schedule) of eating every 2.5-3 hours. I'm not saying to starve your child if they are hungry, but it makes their patterns more predictable, and it might be just what you need.

Nursing is a great bonding experience, but it also takes its toll on mom, so no need to apologize for how you feel! It's really, really difficult being the only person who can feed your baby and having to be there ALL the time! And yes, in the beginning, you don't have much of a life at all. But maybe you can try a couple of things, such as pumping a bit between feedings to build up a stash of milk so that someone else can feed the baby a bottle now and again. Or, you can also try having someone else feed the baby a bottle of formula once a day to give you a break (I have a friend who does this and it's worked quite well for her - she mixes it up a bit so that it's not always at the same feeding). Remember, too, that all babies are different so you might have a totally different experience with the next. I just had my second and third (twins) and they are completely different from their older brother. Older brother did not sleep well at all and wanted to nurse constantly between 3 p.m. and 3 a.m. and I, unfortunately, followed the bad advice of a couple of lactation nurses at Evergreen and ended up sitting nursing for 12 solid hours for three days in a row before I finally broke down, went to the doctor and was told that the baby would have to be off my breast for at least an hour between feedings for any milk to come in (I had supply issues). After that things were better and we ended up supplementing my son as I never did produce enough. The twins, though, were totally different and actually dropped off after a while of feeding! I couldn't believe it! I had to supplement with them as well because they were twins and I never did get much pumping, but I ended up breastfeeding them for 6 months and it was a waaaay better experience. I hope the second time around is better for you! Best of luck...

Whatever you do, don't beat yourself up. I breast fed both of my kids. I have a friend who bottle fed. You can't look at the kids and tell the difference. They are all smart and funny and healthy. There are pros and cons to everything you do in your life. You are the best parent for your child. Good luck!

It sounds like you breastfed your son (wonderful!) in very difficult circumstances, the pain you were in from your delivery, and his demanding needs. Both are on the highly challenging end of the spectrum! It is perfectly natural to be miserable and to not feel enjoyment during this time, and I'm sorry it was that way for you. I hope you're comforted by what a great thing you did for your son. He needed you and you answered that!

Hopefully your delivery experience will be different and you will have a lot of support for recovering from it, I think it should be easier to set that up this time. Then, I'd think you could try to nurse your new baby and see how it goes. Maybe you could plan to hang in there for 4-6 weeks and know that the baby got the touching and nutrition in that early transition time and it was very beneficial. If things are tough, you could consider pumping and feeding with a bottle, and substituting the bonding through nursing with infant massage or just lots of skin to skin. Then maybe your third option could be formula feeding with the massage and skin to skin. I know my two babies nursed differently, and my son (first) was much needier.

The benefits of breastfeeding and breast milk are complex and not completely understood, but it's well known to be the best thing for many interwoven reasons. We know many direct and easy to define benefits, but they're always finding out more. As you discovered, it is a short period of time with lifetime benefits. But I do know mothers who formula fed and did attachment parenting with high quality nutrition that really helped take the place of what happens while breastfeeding.

I think in the end make sure you have a lot of support and that will help you give the breastfeeding a chance this time. I also didn't get warm fuzzies, but just tried to use it as a time to relax, do a little exercise of going through each part of my body and consciously letting it relax. I also read while I breastfeed or pump (I got a handsfree pumping band this time), knowing that it is the only chance I get to read a book. Reading baby development books makes it even better! I don't get to watch tv or movies much, so that's what I do when nursing at night (I got videos from the library and netflix).
Best wishes for a good delivery and joy with your expanded family!

I have been in your shoes! I had twins and I felt lucky if I could get up to pee every four hours. Otherwise I had one or the other twin latched and if i tried to pop them off they would have a screamfest! I was watching dishes pile up in the sink and laundry pile up that I had been so good at putting away and keeping house taken care of. I started resenting the breastfeeding, and I started bottle feeding them with formula. I had my third child when the twins were 17 months old and I have been successfully nursing him for over a year now, without that guilt or frustration that I had with the twins.

Interms of feeding, you can go formula, or you can try goats milk. I used that for my twins because my parents raise dairy goats and need some place for the milk to go other than down the drain! The formula was costing us $120 a month. My twins have done great on goat milk and we still drink it today. Here is one recipe for goats milk: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/3/t032401.asp

Now you also stated that you did really well pumping, I have heard many women are able to pump exclusively and give their baby bottles of breastmilk and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!

You need to make sure that your sanity is safe. If breastfeeding doesn't work for you then it isn't for you and forcing yourself to do it is just going to make you angry and not worth it for the relationship between you and your baby.

Good luck in whatever you choose to do! If you follow your instincts then you are doing what you need to be doing to make a happy mom and a happy baby. Feel free to contact me if you want to talk, no judgements, just support.

S.

First of all, please understand that each baby is different. I spent hours nursing my first one, hardly got anything else done for months. But my second was totally different. He nursed once every 3 hours, and would be done in a reasonable amount of time. But he gained weight faster than his sister did.

Any breastfeeding at all is better than none, so why not try setting a goal? Maybe 1 month or 6 weeks. Then if things are going well, just keep going; but if not, then you can know you gave your baby a good start in life and switch to formula.

I'm all for breastfeeding and doing things the natural way, but let me tell you, I can relate. Not with the breastfeeding per se, but my son has eczema, and we were trying to treat it naturally, using hydrocortisone as sparingly as possible, just trying to figure out the cause. And I came to resent my son during that first year. He was itchy all the time; his skin, especially on his face, was weepy, and he was miserable and time consuming. It was a real emotional drain on me. When I gave up the "natural only" way and started using hydrocortisone faithfully, as much as needed, 2-3 times a day, he became a much easier baby to deal with--and happier, too. I wished I had done it much earlier.

So like I said, try breastfeeding again. Your tailbone might not break this time. You could talk to someone about scheduling. I don't believe in rigid schedules, but if your milk supply is good, then spacing out the feedings a bit (within reason for their age) will probably be fine. Sometimes you just need time between feedings to build up a bit of a supply; then they will drink more per feeding and not be hungry as soon. I have it on good authority (ICU nurse friend) that they have premies on a strict 3-hour feeding schedule, and they thrive.

And keep in mind, formula feeding isn't all that great either. Middle-of-the-night feedings are much easier if you don't have to go warm water and mix formula while the baby screams its head off! And you can use a smaller diaper bag.

Hope that helps!

Are you having another boy? I have to say that when my son was born I felt really really overwhelmed by how often he had to nurse. I had two girls before that, and they were completely different nursers... they would just get right down to business and nurse heavily for 10 minutes or so. My son was a sipper... and it could be very frustrating. I did do some research about why he seemed to need to nurse so much, and I found out that in some cases the milk is made up mostly of hind milk, which is not as staying as the foremilk which can lead to many multiple feedings. I can't remember exactly what you need to do to correct it but it did help me.
It could be that he is just a boy, and if you are having a girl it will be different. Either way, I would suggest looking up the foremilk vs. hindmilk problem. I remember thinking maybe I didn't have enough milk as well, but my son gained over 4 pounds the first WEEK home from the hospital. That is one of the signs of the problem, though. Hope this helps!

A.,
I suggest the book On Becoming Baby Wise, I know it is controversial. But it worked great for me! My story was similar. My first started out great but I realized that by three weeks I was feeding her all the time! so much that I couldn't really do anything and she wasn't napping well either, or for very long, because then she would be hungry. My SIL gave me Baby Wise, and I could kiss her feet for it. It was the best thing that I have done for my babies. after reading it and taking all with a grain of salt. I implemented the things I liked. They were, having a routine for feeding, play time and nap time. In that order. That way after she ate and played a bit and she started getting fussy, I knew that she was tired. When she woke up from her nap I knew she was hungry. Once she was finished eating she was such a pleasant baby, until she was ready for a nap again. It made the biggest difference in my new mommy life.
To get her out of the habit of cluster feeding, I did have to work up to feeding her every two and a half to three hours. So at first I would feed her in the morning for as long as she wanted the first time. Then I would try to give her a nap, if she wanted to eat just 1 hour later, I would hold her and give her a pacifier and try to get her to wait just 15 more minutes.
Each time she could go a little longer until we reached the 2 1/2 hours in between feedings. once she was about 3 months she would nurse every 3 hours, and was sleeping 7-8 hours at night. That means she was eating about 5-6 times in the day. Since then I start right off the bat at nursing my next three babies never less then 2hrs apart, gradually they adjust themselves to a 2 1/2 -3 hr schedule . and it is so wonderful to be predictable and have time to get things done. Get the book you wont regret it! There is always something good you could get out of it:) even if somethings you don't agree with. Take what you like and leave the rest. But it will open your mind to a different view of baby care - consistency.
Good luck
E.

I haven't read all the responses and it sounds like you are already moving in the right direction.
My 2nd child is just under 2 months old. My first was preemie and I was proud to be able to BF after working with her for 6 weeks. Because of pumping I felt like my milk was never quite enough for her and she started solids at 5 1/2 months and weaned at one year.
This time luckily it was no problem to start and my milk is coming in really forcefully. The let-down is so strong that I have to use pads all the time and while feeding the other breast is spurting milk. My daughter (who was also early) has gained over 5 pounds already! Everything was going as expected until she hit about 6 weeks and she seemed to want to nurse constantly. I was starting to pull my hair out and did some research. Found out about hyper-lactation syndrome which causes them to feed more often due to getting too much foremilk and not enough hind milk. All that to say if you are finding the baby feeding more than every 2 hours you can try giving the same breast again so that they will get more hind milk.

I think we are similar- I am a "do-er" and find sitting still boring and difficult. BUT I do find BF very convenient. Just think of the time that it takes to prepare a bottle. In the first few months babies will have to eat in the night regardless. I can't give much advice about the night feedings but during the day it will be a good opportunity to read books to your older son or do something else you enjoy. You may find less night feedings if you focus on feeding more during the day as well.

Every baby is different from the last. Some nurse all night, some have a 10 minute suck every couple of hours. You change from pregnancy to pregnancy. Maybe this time you will feel warm and fuzzy.
Give it a go and see if you are happier this time without a broken tailbone.

I didn't read all of the responses - you got a bunch - so I apologize if this is a repeat. Get your baby on a feeding schedule as soon as possible, I mean after the first few days. You do not need to be constantly feeding the baby. All three of my children were on a 3 hour feeding schedule - they ate every 3 hours (give or take). It worked great. I was able to go to the store, or out to dinner, and I knew when I needed to be back to feed them. It's a little difficult at first, but well worth the effort. Take it slowly and spread the feedings out until you hit roughly the 3 hour mark. Then when you are nursing grab a book, or turn on a favorite show, or something else that you enjoy doing while sitting for 20 minutes. Make it a break time for you. When my third was born I used nursing time as story time for my 18 month old. He would sit with me and we would read stories. Keep in mind that babies not only nurse because they are hungry, but it is also a form of comfort, so look for other ways to comfort the baby. The boob is always good as a last resort, but if you don't want to get burnt out, try to do other things first. Good luck, and remember, it doesn't last forever!

I had the breastfeeding nightmare with my first child - latching problems, supply problems, mastitis, prolapsed glands, and the list goes on. I HATED my breastfeeding experience. That being said, I do think breastmilk offers benefits that formula does not. I choose to exclusively pump. This was also hard work and cumbersome, but I could hook up the pump and then read a book for 20 minutes. I pumped for 20 minutes every 3 hours as this was what my LC recommended to keep my supply up (which is harder when you don't nurse at all). I did manage to keep this going for nine months.

I guess all in all, what I would say to you is that you should give it a chance - each child is an individual and nursing patterns vary by child. One of my friends had a girl who slept for 6 hours at night from day one (and therefore wasn't nursing) and only drank every 4 hours during the day. Her other daughter was nursing every hour and a half. So if could be really different with your next kiddo. This is what is keeping me open to BF next time around.
The other thing I would tell you is that my LC told me a child only needs a couple ounces a day to get the benefits from breastfeeding. This means that if you start pumping and freezing milk from day one (my LC recommended pumping every morning after the first feeding for 5-10 minutes. This helps your supply and you will get the most yeld of milk for your time pumping. Plus the baby has already made you let down so it hurts less), then if it is not working out for you, you will have a small stock in the freezer and can extend the BF benefits to your child by fiving 2 oz daily and then doing the rest formula.

Whatever you decide, don't let other people make you feel bad for doing what is best for your family - your kids need their mother, not just your milk. If it is too overwhelming after giving it a shot, you need to follow your instincts.

Best wishes for happy nursing!!!

To entertain myself during breastfeeding, I often watch TV (mostly news, TLC or discovery channel), listen to books on my ipod or use my laptop when nursing. I also use the time to make phone calls.

I sympathize with your bad experience the first time. The first time I had a child, childbirth was such an awful experience I swore I would never have another child - but 12 years later, I did! Child 2 and 3 were a completely different experience from the first one!

Breast feeding, unfortunately, is the ONLY way to have a completely healthy child. It is the only thing that helps with total brain development. The formulas unfortunately are a sorry substitute for mother's milk. You can pump the breast milk with a Medela breast pump (the least painful I've experienced and it pumps out of both sides at once!!) .

You also need to set limits for your baby. Give him/her 20 minutes to 1/2 hour, then you disengage, and go do something else. A lot of times, they won't be actively feeding, they will just be suckling. When that happens disengage. I cannot picture a child feeding for 5-6 hours straight. When they are done, put them in the bassinet, and go back to sleep. They will learn that the breast isn't available 24/7, so they feed in a reasonable amount of time or lose it!

A bassinet is a life-saver, because it parks right next to Mom's bed, so that she isn't next to the child breastfeeding all night - BAD IDEA. It's a great transition to the crib, but then when baby cries throughout the night, you don't have to stumble all the way to baby's room to get him/her.

Also, you can go out with your child when breastfeed - I would just bring a blanket so if she needed to feed, I could hide her under the blanket in public. Also, the advantage is, less to carry and you never run out!

To answer your question. No. You can also buy human milk from a milk bank at about $3.50 an ounce. Your newborn will need either human milk or formula.

I haven't read any of the other responses, but every baby is different. Your baby's nursing habits may be completely opposite of your son's. There are also some ways to encourage your baby to get a full meal instead of doing the probably "snacking" that your son did. Get in touch with a LLL leader before your baby is born so you have some things to try right away.

I gave my boys both the breast and formula from birth, and neither one had any trouble switching back and forth. I never felt comfortable nursing in public because I had very large breast (H cup), and so I used formula when out or my hubby would use it to take on a night feeding. The most important thing is to try to breast feed the first few days so they get the colostrum and all those immunities from your first milks.

I'm currently breastfeeding my second, too, and I can also get bored and isolated. Breastfeeding is what it is and will be determined mostly by your baby - and may be different than your last experience. Rather than spend tears and frustration on both sides trying to change it, I suggest you find ways to stay connected to the world while you're sitting in a chair (hopefully, with an intact tailbone!).

Here's what I do:

- Have my laptop handy so I can watch shows on hulu.com (a few minutes at a time), check email, etc.
- Check facebook on the laptop or iPhone
- Read a book or magazine
- Listen to NPR
- Play games on my iPhone
- Talk to my husband
- Read a book with my son (if he's up for it)
- Make a to-do list on my iPhone or laptop

Come to think of it, my iPhone keeps me connected and entertained. Plus, I can play some white noise to help my baby sleep. If you can afford one, you may want to consider it. (I'm paranoid about cell phone radiation and turn the phone part off when I'm breastfeeding, but I don't know if there is a risk or not).

Good luck and congratulations on the addition to your family!

Just remember every baby is different. Your second may be easier to manage. If not, do what you need to do and if that means formula, that is ok. But try it first and see what happens.

i think it's very hard to adjust to the slow but constant demanding pace of a BF infant, especially a constant feeder. If you read the books, there are all these new happy mamas who sit quietly and stare lovingly down at their BF infant for hours a day.

I personally felt BF was important, but books, TV, a cell phone and a portable laptop with a wireless link the outside world were what got me thru it. There are a couple types of wraps (one is the Moby) that also allow you to walk around and have one or both of your hands free. The baby can nurse in there too.

and in a grass isn't always greener perspective, bottles werent all that easy either with the cleaning and the heating and the packing to bring with you everywhere). and no matter which you choose, you still have to put in the time for the feedings (altho the schedule you had for your first sounds harder than most!), but you don't have to be bored out of your mind the whole time. Those early months are just hard. and the more bored you feel, the longer they seem.

also, full disclosure- i supplemented with formula for most of the first year and you can manage keeping your supply up with a little supplemented formula to get a break. (i did it b/c i went back to work and had a hard time pumping, but you could do it to get a break if the baby will take to both)

whatever you do, good luck and i hope you can enjoy it more this time.

Just a quick note about your boredom while you breastfeed. I agree that it can be a very isolating experience, but if you do decide to do it again, use this time for yourself. As I've nursed my almost one year old, I've done a lot of thinking, some rest, and some light reading. Of course during the first 6 months it feels like a full time job, but if you are going to do it, try to make it the best experience for both of you. I also have a five year old, who needed mommy time. I think having the luxury to only work part time for the first eight months gave my family the balance we needed as our household grew. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

Haven't read all the other replies, but it's clear you've already gotten plenty of advice. I'd just like to add this:

Babies don't just suckle for milk. Please remember that they also nurse for comfort. If a baby is upset, sick or just longing for attention, it helps to let them suckle at the breast. This works for mine. When nothing else consoles my baby, I let him nurse. After a few minutes, he calms down or falls asleep.

I'm sorry you didn't enjoy breastfeeding. I'm doing it and am having problems (pain, swelling, supply problem, plus it's time-consuming to feed and pump). What I do is I breastfeed when I can, then use a pump to boost supply. If I'm busy or we want him to have a good night's sleep, we give formula. Just not too much. Formula keeps him full for a longer period, it gives you a break, and it lets Dad spend time feeding baby too.

I suggest you rent an electric Medela pump. I've tried it. It's fast and works very well. Also, once you get the hang of it, you'll be able to breastfeed while doing other things, like reading a book or using your laptop. I heard there are baby carriers or slings that make breastfeeding easier, but I've never tried it.

As for your tailbone problem. You should discuss it with your doctor. I set up a lot of pillows and blankets before BF to make sure both me and my baby are comfortable.

As for frequent feedings: Babies nurse often if it's BF because breast milk is easier to digest than formula. Also, it seems to be the natural way to eat until we are taught to have 3 big meals a day. It may be easier on your baby's digestive system. A newborn is just getting used to milk, so smaller feedings are gentler on him or her.

So my advice is, it's OK to supplement with formula. Just do try to breastfeed at least part of the time. Let your baby comfort-suckle. Get others in the family to help you so you won't be so stressed. Good luck to you and your new baby!