Breastfeeding Discrimination Incident

C.-

I did a quick search about breastfeeding laws in Oregon. I found on the La Leche website (link below) women in Oregon are allowed to breastfeed. The rest of the reference material has to do with workplace rules, but it clearly states women can breastfeed in Oregon.

http://www.llli.org/Law/Bills32.html

I suggest you contact the manager/ owner of the office and explain to them that you're rights were violated by their actions and that waiting for another appointment is unacceptable. Unless you recieve an appointment within the next week, (if the have to work overtime that's their fault), you will contact the BBB, The Oregon Medical Board and the State Attorney General's Office and file complaints with everyone.

Breastfeeding is important to the Mother and child's health, their actions are wrong and they need to know it!

I wish you the best of luck. This was a horrible situation.

R. Magby

After reading some information about breastfeeding laws, I am of the understanding that La Leche has been at the forefront in getting these laws past and would be in a position to advise you. I would contact the local LLL and talk to them about your experience and what you can do to get an appointment before your insurance runs out, especially, since some work has already been started.

You also might contact the local YWCA and see if they have lawyers available that might be more intune with women's rights and breastfeeding laws and recourse. I was able to get legal counsel at a YWCA in Colorado when I lived there. I haven't had the need here in Oregon, but...

After you get your ammo from legal means, I would write a letter and also be ready to send a letter to the newspaper/TV station about the incident and you might want to ask others for their stories in the Portland metro area and see if there are others that have been asked to leave or refused service for breastfeeding. This would make the letter to the news a better story and would again bring the breastfeeding issue to the forefront and let other mothers know they aren't alone and that women's and children's rights are being violated.

Heck, I bet the dentist eats in public and how would he/she like it if asked to leave for eating in public? There are some people that really shouldn't eat in public....

Good luck to you and I'm up for a nurse in with my 2 year old if it is needed.
D.

I am amazed at the ignorance of some people. You are MUCH nicer than I am. If anyone tried that with me I would probably cause a scene.

I am not sure if this would just make the problem worse, but people should NOT be allowed to treat anyone that way . . I would:

1) contact your insurance company and ask to speak with a manager/exec/higher up and let them know how you were treated at the only dentist they cover. Demand that they do something about it and if they do not you will contact the local news stations to let them know about it.

2) go to this website and record your complaint
http://www.firstright.org/reportdiscrimination

3) contact the dentist and let them know that you have already been in contact with the insurance company and lodged a complaint about their behavior. I would also let them know that since they were unwilling to complete the work they started and have now effectively cost you more money they should pony up the $$ for you to have it completed elsewhere. If they refuse, let them know that in this economic climate negative advertising isn't good for anyone and you will make sure the local news station and newspapers have this story.

I am usually not big on threats, but this is ridiculous. Are they cavemen??? Seriously what planet are they from?

This is horrible, I am so sorry & you did the right thing. Lawyers can be jerks too, you need to find a good one that advocated for women because you definatly have a case against them & are not the one who shlould apologise. I've encountered sneers before & it made me more determined to nurse in public so that others get used to a natural & beautiful daily routine that people just aren't used to seeing anymore. I would be happy to help organize a nurse-in front of this dentist's office if any other women are into it. We have to stand up & let others know that Oregonian mothers won't stand for this.

My thoughts reading this was that the issue was not the nursing, but that you had you baby there at all. Not that babies are not welcome in the office, but that you cannot have your teeth done with baby in tow. I can see how that could potentially be a disaster. If you did indeed nurse your baby to sleep, and then put him in a carrier, he could wake up crying at any point of that 2 hour appt. When baby does wake up, it will not be during a good point for the dentist. He will have to stop what he is doing and possibly even remove everything he is in the middle of so you can get up to retrieve your baby. Then he has to sit there and waste his time doing nothing while you nurse him back to sleep. If you were to hold him the whole time, that would be an even bigger problem. The dentist then has to worry about the corner of the bib poking him in the face, worry about leaning over him to work, worry about splashing stuff on him, worry about the lights in his tiny eyes, etc..... I can see how they would forbid someone to be worked on if they were caring for a baby alone. They would then also refuse you if you brought in a 2 year old that you were not nursing.

As for rescheduling the appt, it is too bad that they are not willing to work with you! Have you explained to them why it needs to be done soon? You might go in and ask to speak with someone in charge because the scheduling receptionist can only do so much for you. It sounds like they are busy and simply do not have any 2 hour time slots available until Feb. If you talk to the actual dentist in person, they may be willing to take you in and work on you during free moments between other patients. It may take 4-5 hours instead of 2, but at least you'd get in.

It is a horrible feeling to be reprimanded for nursing in public, and I hope that you don't let that experience keep you from nursing on demand in the future. I may be wrong, but my feeling is that that was not the issue in this case.

As a side note, you might check into the dental school at OHSU. When I was a kid, we didn't have money or insurance, and the dental school did all our dental work. You just have to be willing to let the procedure be practice for a student.

I'm very surprised that they were rude about this. I'm not surprised that they would not treat you while you were holding the baby. Breastfeeding should not have been the issue here. Most dentists will not perform dental work while you are caring for a baby or a child. To do so may put the baby in danger. Liability is the big concern in our modern world.

Also having you care for your baby will distract the dentist. Not because you are breast feeding but because you are focused on something different than getting treatment. Because you are holding the baby or even if the baby is in a car seat in the room it is likely in a 2 hour session that you will need to respond to the baby which would then interfere with the work being done.

My grandchildren's dentist requires that the child not being treated not be in the treatment room even tho their appointments follow each other. So, at first I would go and wait with the one child while their mother went in with the other. Now that the children are older the one child goes in by himself and I wait with the other in the waiting room.

I would call the insurance company. They may be able to get you in with a different dentist. I'm confused about why their plan has only one dentist. I would focus on their rude manner of handling the situation instead of the breast feeding issue. As you know breast feeding is an emotional one for many people.

I would also find out who owns the dental practice and write that person a letter of complaint. If it's a one dentist office it may be that your dentist is the owner. I sounds like you never talked with him at the time.

I would not call the office and make demands or threats. That is stooping to their level. Deal with this in a classy way.

I am surprise that the attorney told you to apologize etc. Is this an attorney who specializes in civil rights and/or women's issues? If not talk with one who has had experience in this field. You may have grounds for a law suit.

If the attorney made that recommendation because you wanted to get earlier treatment his recommendation is correct. I know of no other way you can get an earlier appointment. Apologizing would not effect future legal action. It might get you in to take care of your teeth/tooth.

I understand why you would be upset and end up crying. It sounds like they were not sensitive to your needs. At the same time it's possible that you made the assumption that they were refusing to allow you to breastfeed when their intent was to have you find someone to care for your baby while you received treatment.

It is best anytime you have needs different than the needs of the average patient to call in advance to make arrangements.

I had a similar experience with the police. I am a retired police officer. The police were called to my cousin's house and I assumed that the officer was not hearing me when it turned out he wanted to talk about something different than I thought he was asking about. He and I exchanged heated words until I stopped talking long enough to actually hear him. Sometimes, especially when we've had similar experiences or heard of similar experiences, we jump to conclusions when we should first listen.

I understand why you are feeling embarrassed but you don't need to be embarrassed. Tell yourself that you did the best that you could; that you were standing up for your beliefs, that they did not understand you and as a result you were involved in miscommunication. Communication is difficult. So let go of your anger and your embarrassment and focus on finding a way to get your dental needs taken care of. Your need for treatment far outweighs your need to prove a point.

We all have to compromise at times to get our needs met. It may be illegal to send you away based on you breastfeeding tho I'm sure that if you do take them to court they will say it was a safety issue unrelated to breast feeding. Consider that you dealt with a couple of people who have poor people skills and let it go at that. What do you gain by continuing the fight? You will be unable to change those people. You are making yourself miserable by insisting that you win.

Here is a note about apologies. My mother taught me that I could apologize without admitting any wrong doing just by saying, "I'm sorry that (this incident) happened." YOu could say, I'm sorry that we had this misunderstanding. As you know the Dr. has begun treatment and I really do need more treatment so that I'll have less pain. Is there any way that he could see me this month? Perhaps I could come in for a couple of shorter appointments. My mother will watch my baby." You would not be admitting any wrong doing. You would be reasonably complying with their "rules" and you would get your teeth fixed. Everyone is a winner.

A thought: I'm not sure that it is illegal for a private office to refuse to allow breast feeding in their waiting room. You are on private property and not an employee. I think a dental office would be different than a store open to the public. You might look this up on the Internet. The legal question becomes is the dentist office a private or a public place?

WOW.
When my husband went in for dental procedures while I was at work he had the exact opposite reaction. When he went in, our daughter was whisked away by the receptionist to play while Trevor got his teeth fixed. He too had intended to have her sleep in the car seat with him during the procedure. Aly was also pretty young--under three months old.
I find it astonishing that there is such a difference in how these dentists behaved. We too, I should mention, are from Oregon. We live in the valley however, maybe you just had a couple of snobby jerks from the Portland hills.
In anycase, my husband and I are very sure that breastfeeding in public is legal in Oregon--as long as you are note showing nude parts.

Goodluck!

I agree with Heather B.---You are a much nicer person than I am. I totally would have made a big scene and would report them to all and every person that would listen--Including the news. I know they probably couldn't treat you with your infant there due to malpractice insurance rules BUT that is not what THEY made the issue about. I hope you call La Leche and get them to complain also or refer you to a better lawyer. Good Luck!!!

C.,
These people sound awful. It certainly wasn't handled in a sensitive way (and no wonder you were upset--you were 3 weeks postpartum!) I would first call the Oregon Dental Board http://www.oregon.gov/Dentistry/file_complaint.shtml and possibly file a complaint with the dental certifying board.
I'm not sure there's much you can do, legally, because though the law states that you can breastfeed in a public place (and I'm not sure if this includes the waiting room of a private office, but it includes grocery stores, which are technically publicly owned) it doesn't include any kind of consequence for someone who ignores (or is ignorant of) the law. It sucks, but it's true.
Check out some of these other people's suggestions, but also give a call to the Dental Board to see if you can find out more about the professional and ethical codes and see if they violated any of those.
Good luck. :(

Michelle S and Marda P are spot on. The issue was not the nursing, although I do suspect that the office manager may have had some personal issues about it. When my own baby was about three weeks, I also had several hours of dental work done. I nursed her in the lobby while waiting for my turn, but I also brought a friend to watch her while I received treatment, and to take me home. Even without heavy medication, dental work can incapacitate you for a day or two. It would never occur to me to hold her or have her in the treatment room, because it is highly inappropriate. What if a mishap happened, like an allergic reaction to the numbing shot, and you had be taken to the emergency room? Who would be in charge of your baby? These are the things you have to think about now that you are a parent:)
I think that the offices mentioned below that do take care of the kids while parents get their treatments are not very professional in my opinion.
Good luck, and good job breastfeeding! There will be many people that will try to give you grief, my advice is try to be as loving and patient and understanding as you can about others attitudes:)

You've already received some links on where to report this. I would also send a strongly but very professionally stated letter to them explaining that you are transferring to another Dentist and explain why. Their treatment was completely horrible, especially when your mother was going to come and help with the baby. I am not sure what you were going to have done, so there may have been safety issues, but they made it obvious that the main reason was the nursing since you were approached while in the waiting room nursing your baby. If it was a safety concern, someone could have asked if there was someone to watch the baby as you would not be able to hold your baby during the procedure. But in my experience, I have brought my daughter with me to appointments and have never had any issues. Everyone has been kind and found a place to put her car seat while I was getting my cleaning. When I need an xray, one hygienest took my daughter around the corner for those few seconds and then brought her back to avoid exposure, I was allowed to nurse her when she was a newborn, etc, etc.

I see a doctor at Lake Grove Dental if you are interested in switching. While I wouldn't expect most dental office to be so accommodating, they have always been so kind and supportive, I know I can come there whether I can get a sitter or not, or when my babies are newborns and can't be away from me for very long.

Good luck!
A.