Breast Feeding - Mesa, AZ

It's not his decision, it is proven that breastfeeding is best for the mother and for the child. My son's father was the same way and I breastfed anyways and I don't regret a thing. I feel great the I did what was best for my son and the bonding time we had is irreplaceable.

Ok - what about this. What if you tell him that you'd like to TRY breastfeeding? He can see what it's all about and see how you feel about it, too. Put a time frame on it. See if he will go for a month and at that time you can talk about it and tell him how you feel about the breastfeeding. That way you both go into it with an open mind. I guess that is what I would do.

Good luck!!

Other than the well-known health benefits for the baby, you might want to let him know that women who breastfeed generally lose the pregnancy weight quicker than women who don't. Also, it's a lot cheaper than formula.

I dont want to sound like a man-hater here... but just what does he have against it? And how exactly is it his choice? I have heard of mothers being too busy... or not being interested enough to put in the effort. However, in NO WAY will it harm the baby... so why does he even care?? If it was a question of whether or not to do it because it could possibly hurt the baby, or cause problems later in life, I could understand the question. But when it's something that will literally do nothing but help, I can't believe you are even saying the words "convince him to let me". To LET YOU breastfeed your baby??? Are you kidding? If you want to, then DO IT. He has no say, I dont care what happened to HIM as a newborn. He needs to wake up, and respect your decision to do so, and realize that in the process he's helping your child both now and later in life!

I can't think of any good reason at all why your husband wouldn't want you to breastfeed. There isn't one in my opinion. It is probably a selfish reason, and you can't be selfish when it comes to your children and what is best for them. Any issues he has with it can be worked through. If it is something you want to do, he should support that decision. Having his support would be nice, but isn't necessary since there are lots of support groups out there for you. My husband was a little apprehensive about it at first, mostly because it was an unknown to him, he's an only child and hadn't ever been around kids, but got used to it. He was very supportive of me and a huge help. It was the best decision I ever made. My son breastfed for almost 2 years, and I would have been willing to go longer, but my son weaned himself. I miss it sometimes because it is a wonderful feeling that you share with your baby. Don't miss out on it if it is something you want to do, he's not the one that will be doing it, so it is ultimately your decision. You can always try it and see how it works for the both of you and then if it isn't working out, you can change later, but you can't decide to breastfeed later. Hope this helps. Good luck with your little one.

Oh H., I am really sorry. My first reaction is really angry....How can he "Let you"???? I've been married for a long time and I can't ever imagine conceeding something I believe in with the very core of my being, for an uneducated, biased belief that my husband, or anyone else would throw at me. It makes me think of this line of thinking...
"I never ate vegtables growng up so why should our baby"? or "I never put on my seatbelt why should you" It borders ignorance, and I'm telling you, you sharpen your husband, you make him a better person, as he does to you, Don't give up.

Second reaction, Are you two on the same page?
Get your evidence that this is the best choice and tell him about it. Slowly let him know this is what you really want to do and know with confidence a million babies from the beginning of time can't be wrong, this is the way God intended, before formulas and bottles, women who unfortunetly couldn't breastfeed handed over their little ones to "wet nurses", still breastmilk, nothing artificial. You will be the one primarily taking care of the baby so really he's just being controlling, and probably doesn't want anyone else to have your boobs, Think, why were they put on your body?.....TO BREASTFEED. Form follows function!
I'm really sorry if I upset you at all, it's not my intention, I just want you to understand he really shouldn't have a say in this, but it doesn't change the fact he might give you a hard time, but it's your choice. period. He'll have to deal. Question, would you rather give up something you feel is right and build bitterness toward you man or stick with it and give him the pleasure in seeing a chubby happy baby who will probably NOT get ear infections, probably NOT get sick as much, and will enjoy the right temperture all the time, right consistancy, right amount all the time, of food. I am here for you and if you want to email me I welcome that. God bless you and I hope this is helpful. T.
Just to let you know and for your husband, these are some of the ingredients found in popular formulas...Water, enzymatically hydrolyzed reduced minerals, whey protein concentrate (from cows' milk), vegetable oils (palm olein, soy, coconut, high-oleic safflower), lactose, corn maltodextrin....
Enfamil Nutramigen Hypoallergenic Formula -Water, corn syrup solids....casein hydrolysate, modified corn starch...carrageenan, L-cysteine....
Ross Isomil Soy Formula with Iron- Water, corn syrup, sugar, soy protein isolate...modified cornstarch...carrageenan....
MeadJohnson Enfamil with Iron Reduced minerals-, whey, nonfat milk...carrageenan...
Obviously if you have no other choice but really most of these items are dangerous for babies to ingest separately....why would they be any different in a concoction....that's why it's called formula....it's a concoction. Mommas milk is all natural 100%.
Would you want your wedding ring to be a CZ or a real 100% diamond. God bless, T.

H., I am going through the same exact thing. I am 6mths pregnant and also want to breast feed. I understand. I simply told my husband that it is natural and will save us money. Guys tend to focus on the financial side and not emotional side when it comes to this subject. I AM going to breast feed because it is the best thing for our baby, just convince your husband. I know it is hard because I have a mother in law also telling my husband that it is not neccessary and how is everybody else suppposed to feed when I am at work. This is very selfish on their part and the overall concern should be for the well being on the unborn childs health. Stand strong if you believe in something, and I promise that they will see that life will go on and the baby will love everyone who feeds them. Email me if you want to talk more. I am 27 with one 9yr and 6 months pregnant with my husband and I first child together. Strength is the key.

Although breastfeeding isn't widely accepted it is the most beneficial source of food.I am a mother of a 6 month old girl and I breastfeed,luckily my husband doesn't mind and actually feels it better to breastfeed.One thing you can tell you husband is that it will save your money show him the cost of formula $12-25 and beastfeeding which is free.Also share facts about breastfeeding benefits which may help sway him.You might also see if maybe he is uncomfortable with an exposed breast in front of people and maybe if that is a factor you can pump and have breast milk in a bottle for public outings.Hope that helps.Good luck.

OMG H., My Daughters Initials are H. H too. Fancy that. And it is her that I am refering to when I answer your request. I got presured from my husband not to breastfeed too an I have regreted it ever since. It probably doesnt' have a thing to do with his mothers situation more about him feeling left out of the mix. Reassure him that it will not take anytime away from him and baby as you can pump milk for him to take over while you get some much needed rest. Some men think it is selfish for women to get this type of bonding but also let him know that it is very good for the babies digestive system and the baby will not have problems with excepting it like with store bought formula. They are very expensive too. A baby that gets breast fed has a better chance at fighting most sicknesses and would he want the baby to miss out on that chance? Why take that risk if you don't have too. As for not producing enough milk the baby will deside how much is enough. With the birth of my second child I put my foot down and did it anyway and my son trives and gets sick let often. He also fed every half hour and completely drained me. He was a milk hog. Babies deside if they need more and you just sit back or lay back and let it all happen. IT is only natural and it is a great experience for all three of you. Keep him involved he should come around with some factual power backing you up. GOod luck ;)

I say put you foot down and stand up for your rights. My ex didn't want me to breast feed my son , so i didn't. I regret it all the time. the other 2 children i did and they are healther.

Its the absolute best gift you can give your baby. Your milk especially when the baby is first born and weeks thereafter have the MOST nutrients.. Maybe call LaLeche League they will have some really good suggestions I'm sure. I didn't breastfeed my first one and I am completely regreting it now, she is sick all the time and doesn't have a great immune system, my youngest seems to fight everything off quickly and is so well adjusted.

have him talk to your doctors or the lactation consultant at the hospital you are haveing your little girl at. you have to remember that it is your body. you will be doing thr best thing for your baby. plus it is not like the baby will be nursing from him.

Hi H.- I would tell him the benefits of breastfeeding vs. using formula. It's your baby, it's not like he can actually stop you from breastfeeding. I find it really odd that he doesn't want you to, I can't imagine what his reasoning is. The best of luck!!!

Hi H.,
You didn't mention why he doesn't want you to nurse. If you could tell us why maybe we could respond better.

The only reason I can think he wouldn't want you to is that some men think of breastfeeding as sexual. Which I think is totally off-the-wall but, unfortunately, some do. If such is the case...He really needs to get over it!!! The health benefits for both you and the baby are insurmountable and I can guarantee you will never experience anything like feeding your baby. It is the most memorable bonding experience ever!!! Furthermore, while you might not believe it now, in the future when you feel like you are at your wits end because the baby has been crying all day/night and won't sleep or whatever (just a bad day) suddenly everything is ok once you hold that little being and feed them. You calm down, relax, and I've been known to fall asleep right there with my baby. In my opinion, there isn't any other experience in the world like nursing your baby.
If you feel you must have his permission, you have got to convince him or have others help him understand. It might help to have another father who supports breastfeeding talk with him.
Personally, I would have to take a stand on this issue and say, "too bad, I'm doing it!" However, the consequences of not having a lot of support can be difficult. Believe it or not, breastfeeding is something you learn to do well. It takes time and patience. Most women experience a lot of discomfort at first...but, this passes quickly, usually within a week or two at most. I guess what I'm trying to say is prepare yourself!

First of all, you have all of us. In addition, contact La Leache League. They have groups of moms that get to together and help each other in many ways. Besides, you will meet a lot of new friends.

Good Luck! Please keep us posted.
L.

I would talk to your doctor or midwife and enlist their help in explaining the benefits of breastfeeding. Also, find other information from the La Leche League for him to read. All the information out there explains the benefits of breastfeeding over formula.

Definitely talk to your doctor about the benefits of breastfeeding and whether or not there are any logical reasons you should not. Then just get as much information as possible for your husband. Hopefully he will come around.

Good Luck!

Hi, H.. I know you've gotten a lot of responses at this point, and there's obviously a lot of passion surrounding this issue. And I want you to know that I DO NOT DISAGREE with the moms adamant on breastfeeding. The health benefits, bonding benefits, cost benefits and convenience ARE unparalleled, in my opinion. But I don't think you should be pressured into anything, one way or the other. Since you already want to breastfeed your daughter, I absolutely think you should try it, and also keep the lines of communication open with your husband in the process. There may be a valid concern in his eyes, and this is the wrong time for the two of you to be at odds. (Becoming a mom is hard enough without having to butt heads with your husband.) I would take the advice of others who recommend having your doctor talk to him, printing out articles you find on BF benefits, and try to reason with him. Ultimately, the two of you need to decide what is right for your sweet little one.

All that said, I just want to let you know that if breastfeeding turns out not to be right for your family, or if it simply can't be done, it's not the end of the world. I really wanted to breastfeed my first child for all the obvious reasons, and when he was born, he and I just couldn't get it together, so to speak. There were ppd issues, and it got so bad that I would have panic attacks at feeding time, and both of us ended up frustrated and crying. My stepmom helped me realize that not being able to breastfeed was not a failure on my part, and it would probably be better not to push either one of us (my son or me) anymore. I put him on formula and never looked back. The bottles were a pain in the neck, don't get me wrong (so much so that we had a ceremony when he turned 1 and we got to throw them all out!), but my son was perfectly healthy - the healthiest of my three kids, and the other two WERE breastfed - and I bonded with him just fine.

I didn't tell you my story to frighten you, sweetie. There are plenty of moms who push through the first-time struggles just fine. And, believe it or not, there are moms who don't experience the kinds of struggles with feeding their newborns that I did. I'm only recommending that you try to get your husband on board, and don't worry so much either way. Odds are, your little girl will be healthy and happy if you and your husband are, so do what you feel is right for her and have a blast, H.. Motherhood is awesome!

To add to everyone elses advice the breastmilk has antibodies so they will stay healthy. so you will save money on doctors appointments and medicine stating that the baby is healthy. I breastfed my third child and i loved it and would do it again in a heart beat i saved so much money.

Why doesn't your husband want you to breast feed? Any respone I would have depends on his reasoning.
S.

I understand what you are going through. I had the same problems with my husband. Actually, I think that it was more his mother telling him that he would not be able to bond with the baby if I nursed. What I did was I printed a ton of articles on breast feeding and gave them to my husband to read. Then I took him to the store to show him the cost of formula. That was a real shock to him. The other thing to tell him is you never have to worry if you brought enough formula with you. Needless to say here I am 3 months later and still nursing my son and my husband loves every minute of it. And he has a wonderful bond with his son.

Best of Luck to You!

H., I was completely struck with your posting. It made me sad/angry that you feel like your husband makes you feel like you have to "convince" him or that he has to "let" you do this. To me, that is the bigger picture - something I hope he doesn't carry into other areas of your relationship.

In any case, as a doula and lactation educator, I have to tell you that breastfeeding is a ntural, normal thing to do - which offers awesome health benefits (now and in the future) for you and your child. Here are 101 reasons to breastfeed: http://www.mybirthcare.com/101reasons.asp I would encourage your husband to read all 101 reasons, and then give you 101 reasons why you shouldn't breastfeed!! LOL

As a man, he may respond to these facts: it will save him hundreds of dollars, he won't have to prepare/clean bottles, you can get your shape back more quickly, you'll have voluptuous breasts, and on and on.

Most importantly, this is YOUR body and decision. Follow your heart and go for it! Get support through La Leche League and other mom's groups. Read, and learn online. Empower yourself - you go girl!

has he done any reading on breast feeding ? if not he should
one thing to let him know is that if the baby is not getting
a full tummy you will both know that ,lol by the baby screaming ,it is unlikely that the baby will go hungry because
formula is made so well, you can always bottle feed in between if you both feel the baby is not getting a full tummy ,also it is very good for baby if you can breast feed for the first month or so then if your husband is still not comfy with it you can change over to a bottle ,this way the baby gets what he or she needs before full milk comes in this also helps in baby being stronger .if after all this is done and he is still saying no ,then both sit down and write the good and bad things that you can think of on breast feeding and bottle feeding and see what out weighs the best answer for the both of you and for baby .

First off, it's your body! Explane to your husbands the benefit of breast milk over formula. Then, when out at the stores price the formula. That alone should give him a more positive outlook. I think some men have issues with women breatfeeding because they feel like those (your breast) were his and now he has to share!

I breast feed for 2 months and wished that I produced enough milk to continue. Tell your husband that your gona give it a try and that this is something that is very important to you. Once he see's his child his attitued hopefully will change. We all want the very best for our children right?

Hang in there, and good luck!

you really should breast feed because its healthier for the baby,plus its also cool for you, no more periods till you stop breast feeding... i think he might be a little jelous if you know what i mean!!!!! if you do breast feed do not eat chocolate!!!!!!!!!

will i breastfeed both of my boys and i think it was the best thing for them. my oldest his almost 3yrs and i think it really benefited him cause he is way advance from other kids his age, its crazy to think but i think its cause i breast feed him also he never got sick like with a cold or anything. i breast feed my youngest his almost 3 months old and can you beleive that he was a preemie you wouldn't think that now cause his all chubby wubby. well he weighed 5lbs 8oz. now he ways about 13lbs or so. plus it's good for them cause some babies do need that extra nutrients. i think if you want that bonding experience with your child this is the best way to do so. talk to your husband let know how you feel, i bet anything when your child is born he won't even mind he'll probably ended wanting you to do it.but let him know how you feel okay

Hello

Have you explained to your husband the benefits of it both health wise and financially? Of course not to mention the bonding expeerience. Ask him to help you do research about both. It should be about whats best for the baby and I am sure he wants to provide whats best for his child. Now I struggled breastfeeding my first and if it wasn't for my commited BF I would of probably quit out of frustration. He helped attach him and get us going till we got the hang of it but I am so glad we persisted and he was breast fed till like 10 mos.

Good luck
A.

There is so much printed material on the benefits of breast feeding one's child.Sounds like he has other issue's.I breast fed both of my children,They are healthier ect... Hey your the mom do what s best for your child .They come first.

Hi my name is E. and I breast fed both my children. My husband was adopted so he wasn't breast fed either. It was kind of hard I thought when we'd go to his parents house just because his mom and sister would always say stuff about how we couldn't leave or do anything because no one but me could feed him. I would just get all the facts on it and sit down with him and let him read or see all the benefits that go along with breast feeding. I breast fed my son for 8 months and the first time he ever got sick ran a temp or anything he was a month away from being 2. If your husband can understand how you really feel and know all the benefits to it he might change his mind. When some of my friends got married they said they wouldn't breast feed and I would always tell them that they quit smoking and drinking for their baby's health why wouldn't they breast feed for their baby's health

Why would a man be concerned about breastfeeding a child? Is it the idea of pulling out your breast in public? Without a doubt, breastfeed. I breastfed for two and a half years and it is the best thing physically and emotionally for a child. I have heard that formula is not good for a baby because it assaults the brain with chemicals and vitamins a baby's body isn't ready for. Also there is evidence children who are breastfed are calmer overall (being that they are close to their mom, touching our skin while they feed) are better in school, and aren't sick as often, because of the natural antibodies breastmilk provides. I would never feed a baby man-made cooked up formula if I can produce milk.

Hey H.,
Breastfeeding is very rewarding. But it is also a decision that you have to make yourself. The benefits of BF also are tremendous. Your baby won't get sick as much because they will get antibodies from your milk. Something else to think about is that it is free. Formula is very expensive! Also it is always ready, no need to heat it up. Many people think that they don't produce enough milk, but it is supply and demand. The more time you put baby to the breast the more milk you will produce. They tend to eat more often because the milk is easier to digest than formula. BF also burns tons of calories and helps you get back to your prepregnancy weight faster. Here is a little article I pulled up. You can show it to him. Just copy and paste to your browser.

http://www.wildchildmagazine.com/display.php?id=449&l...

I BF my son until he was 14 months old. I was able to go back to work and pump. It is a little uncomfortable at first, but it goes away. Well I hope this helps! Good luck to you in whatever choice you decide to make. J.

If you can breastfeed, definitley do! There are so many benifits for the baby as well as for yourself! I have two kids and I couldn't breastfeed my son because I didn't produce milk, so when my milk came in with my daughter I was so excited. The bonding is unlike anything else and breastmilk doesn't stink like formula does. If your husband is worried about not being able to feed the baby, you can always pump and put it in the bottle. If you want to breastfeed, don't let anyone discourage you!!

It's your decision. He doesn't have to let you.

First I want to tell you that it is your body not your husbands and you should calmly explain to him the benefits of breastfeeding to bottle feeding. If he still doesn't agree with you then I would say that is his opinion and he would not be the one breastfeeding the baby so if breastfeeding is your choice then do it and he will just have to deal. He might be against your decision at first but as soon as he notices that you will be the primary one getting up in the middle of the night for feedings he might just be happy with it. *REMEMBER- it's your body not his and you have every right to breastfeed your baby to give him/her a healthy start in life and a strong immune system!*

There are many, many studies that suggest breastfeeding is better for your child as it helps pass immunities that will protect them during the first 1-2 years of their life. I am sure you could find some convincing articles on the internet as well as information from a pediatrician or really any Dr. Not only does it help with immunities but also with the mother/baby bond. I breastfed for 6 months before switching to formula and my only regret is not doing it for longer. Once you aren't breastfeeding anymore then anyone can feed your baby and spend that time with them and maybe I was selfish but I wanted him all to myself for at least a couple minutes throughout the day. This might sound rude too but I don't see why your boyfriend thinks he has any decision in the matter. My husband had some issue with it at first but once the baby was born and after I explained that I would breastfeed no matter what, it didn't take long for him to get over it.

I dont necessarily agree with all the hubbub about babys who are breast fed turn out any better than those who arnt, but I feel its a personal choice. I couldnt because after my ceserean and all the drugs in my system afterwords my milk was not good and I didnt feel safe passing it on to my son.
I think maybe your husband may feel uncomfortable about the public isssue of being ouy with you and the baby and having people stare more than anything. My husband felt the same and I guess seemed releived that I couldnt so he wouldnt feel nucomfortable. Maybe you can discuss how you can make him feel more of a part of it and feel more comfortable when out in public. Maybe thats the real reason he objects. Just a thought. But in the end breast fed or not my son is hardley ever sick and very advanced for his age. He loves his mommy and we are very close. it all works out in the end.

Hi H.,
You must feel pretty upset. I am a La Leche Leage leader in Surprise. There are meeting all around the valley and some even have meetings specifically for couples. Are you familiar with La Leche League? It is a breastfeeding support group for breastfeeding moms. It has been around for 50 years. I you would like some information on meeting times and locations you can go to the La Leche League website or I would be happy to help you find a meeting. I think you and your husband would find it very informative and it is the most accurate information on breastfeeding. Please let me know if I can be of any help. Anothe suggestion is to buy a book called "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" This is the breastfeeding bible.

Sincerely,
T. Bailey