Breaking the News to 2 Year Old

Hi J. - congrats! I just had my second in Nov - my oldest was only 14 months when the new baby was born. There are some good Karent Katz books and the one that she really related to was a book with the character Cailou - called Cailou's baby sister. It didn't really sink in with my daughter until my belly was growing and we let her touch it. We did explain that the new baby is coming and would practice - how we were going to pat the baby and be soft with the baby. The other thing we did which I loved, is that my daughter got a special build-a-bear stuffed animal the day before I went to the hospital, and that was her special bear that came with her to visit me at the hospital with grandma. Then once I came home, every day for about a week, she got to open a small gift that was to her from the baby. The opening of a gift and the new toys (actually birthday presents that we held back and re-wraped) - were a great new distraction and some great attention just for her.
Congrats and best of luck!

My daughter was almost 2 when I became pregnant. We read lots of books and I just started talking about the changes in my body as well as the things I was doing differently- diet, water, exercise- and why. She went to all my midwife appointments with me and got to hear the heart beat as well as feel the baby's placement and movement. She loved this and would often want to play midwife at home with our own stethoscope. I kept bringing it back to her, telling her about my pregnancy with her- what I ate, wore, how she presented, heart beat, birth ++++ and how this baby was different or the same. She did great adjusting to the new baby and being a big sis.

check out the local library. They have great books that can help and you don't have to pay for them. Congrats and Good luck!!!

wait. . . wait . . . wait. My son was 3 3/4 when baby #2 came and he still didn't really get it. Even when you are a giant pregnant lady they don't get it. And little kids mostly feel if it's not happening TODAY or maybe tomorrow, it might as well be forever. I'm not saying don't say anything but you don't need to say much now - you don't want her to be surprised if someone asks her about being a big sister or something but i would save the books etc. for waaay later.

Also, it might be helpful to look at pictures of her as a newborn, you pregnant etc. and show how big she is getting every day etc.

J.,
From your tagline, I thought you were breaking bad news!
This is a time of excitement and joy! What is so hard about playing dolls and sharing with your daughter that a new baby is coming into her world?
with my whole heart, C.

Congratulations! I just compiled list for my friend, but can't find it anywhere. If you e-mail your local library, they should be able to give you a list of suitable books!

I'm in the same boat you are; 12 weeks pregnant with a little girl who will be 2 next week. They don't always get it because they are so busy and focused on theirselves. Some things that have helped us were having family members and close friends comment about how she is going to be a great big sister when she plays nice with her baby dolls or helps me with cleaning up. You can see her face beam from the praise and I think it is starting to sink in. We also love Mercer Mayer Little Critter books. There is one called "The New Baby" that we like to read. I know we have other books, but I'm drawing a blank right now. If its okay with you, the dad and the doctor, conside bringing her a long to a check up where they will do an ultrasound. My husband and daughter waited in the waiting room and our nurse went and got them when it was time for the ultrasound. She really like looking at a picture of the baby in mommy's belly. We told her it was the size of one of her bunny grams and that it had a lot of growing to do. We also talked about how she would have a lot of growing to do to. We then talked about some things she'll be big enough to do when the baby arrives; sleep in a big girl bed, ride a tricycle, go to preschol 2 mornings a week, etc. Hope this helps. I'll be interested to read the other posts and get some more ideas myself. Good luck!

We took our daughter to the ultrasound appointments and that seemed to help a lot. Then we would put them up so she could see them. This helped a lot and she would always say baby when she saw them. Then we would talk about the baby in my tummy and ask her where the baby is. It takes a while for them to get it but they eventually make as much sence of it as they can. It doesn't fully hit them though until you are bigger and really until the baby is here. Good luck.

You're still pretty early to discuss it a lot, since two-year-olds don't yet understand a lot of time concepts. But, my children have just loved the books "What's Inside?" and What Happens Next?" by Jeanne Ashbe. They are beautiful, lift-the-flap books that talk about how there is a growing baby inside mom, and that the logical order of things will mean that when the baby comes, some things will be the same and some things will be a little bit different. The illustrations are darling and depict the older sibling being gentle and helpful. The are exactly the right level for a two-year-old.
Other excellent books are "What Baby Needs" by Dr. William Sears. There's also one more he wrote that is more about waiting for the baby than about caring for it after it arrives, but the title is escaping me. I'm sure you could find it on Amazon if you search under "What Baby needs." There's a lot more text in those books, but the illustrations are so charming you could just talk about them. My children have loved all of these.
Best wishes!

As you become bigger, it becomes more real. Trust me, kids 'get it' more than they let on. Since its still early in the pregnancy my advice is to just do what you're doing...explain a baby sibling is on the way and will be here in October (?) and as you and her get bigger and she asks more questions, answer them for her. I know you're excited and want her to be just as excited but her timeline is different than yours and 8 months is an eternity for her. Let her come around in time.

My daughter was 27 mos when we found out she was having a baby brother. I told her but like you until I started showing she didn't quite understand. I let her feel the baby move when he did, I took her though to all my OBGYN appts, she got to see the baby on the ultrasound, hear the heartbeat and then it sank in! As I progressed so did she in becoming more aware. I kept her involved in all my visits, updates, picking out clothes for the baby and all of that. She was very excited. Like Heather I got that same book and others about new babies coming home.
The night before her little brother came home we got her a baby boy doll so she could take care of it while I was taking care of the baby.
I also got out her photo album and showed her pictures of when she was in my tummy, what she looked like when I first brought her home and explained why babies cry, why they need so much attention and all of that. I had her practice with newborn diapers on her babies so she knew what I was doing too. There was no jealousy or resentment as a matter of fact she yelled at me to pick him up immediately every time he fussed! :) She was very doting and I think keeping her involved in every aspect was huge for her. CONGRATS!

Until you get closer that baby will be a very difficult idea for your 2 year old. Once you get the bulge start identifying babies around you..."when our baby is born it will be smaller than this baby" Just to give her the idea.
Other things that I did to smooth the way is saying things like "this baby loves you so much (if you have a name picked otu that works too) It thinks you are going to be the best big sister"
We also bought a present for our daughter from the new baby and took it with us to the hospital. Our daughter got it when she came to see us for the first time after the baby was born. It really helped.
Then we asked that when our relatives came to the hospital and to our home they asked our oldest daughter to show them the new baby. That way she took some ownership too and it was her baby.
My friends have said it was the best transition from 1 to 2 that they have ever seen. It worked again when we went from 2 to 3.
Good luck

My daughter is a year older than yours; she turned 3 in February. I have tried to explain about the baby in mommy's belly, but she still doesn't understand entirely. The best thing you can do is involve her; for instance, when you go buy baby items let her help you with it. I have talked to my doctor who has said that at such an early age (under 4) it is hard for children to comprehend what they cannot actually see. As you start to grow and your daughter can see the actual changes in your body she will start to understand better, but until your child arrives she will not completely comprehend. I did go to the local library and find a great abundance of books for children that help explain what it means when mom is having a baby. This may help you. Good luck!