Breaking the Co Sleeping Habit

I’m not sure if at 4 months it’s a habit just yet. He just sleeps better next to his Mommy. Some babies are like that =-) I know! My son was the same way!

Either way it will take a bit of time to get him to want to sleep all alone in his crib. Patience right now IS a virtue! First step is probably just NOT taking him back to bed with you. Do you have a chair in his room? When he wakes maybe you can rock him or just pat his back a bit?

I’m not an advocate of the crying it out method so I cannot advise you there.

Sorry that’s all I’ve got!

We went through the same thing with my daughter for the first four months of her life and co-sleeping was definitely not for me, either. Try the Ferber method. I bought his book, but you can find information at http://www.sleep-baby-sleep.com/ferber-method.htm. This was a lifesaver and my daughter was in her own bed almost immediately. Good luck - I know how tough this can be!

Can you put his crib in your room near you? If not then possible use a heating pad to heat the bed before you put him in it as the temp might be enough to wake him up. The only thing I can think of just keep putting him in his bed and you stay in yours.

I didn't have mine in the bed with me unless it was an emergency sleeping situation with my son who had allergies and couldn't sleep right. The next day he was admitted into hospital. We co-slept in such a way that neither of us moved the whole night and we both got the rest we needed.

Good luck to you with getting him to sleep in his bed and you getting a good night's rest.

The other S.

Because I'm a bed sharing advocate and understand baby biological need to have skin to skin contact with Mommy all the time - I'll keep my long explanation to myself.

I'll just say bed-sharing and breastfeeding were the two most important decisions I made for my child's needs. She's 5 now and has moved from our bed into her own room on her OWN volition and is very proud of her big girl status because the choice was hers.

I never felt like I was going to smush her, she never felt confined and neither did I. But we all got plenty of sleep!

I give this advice not having to have to do it, so it may not work, but this is what I would try if I was in your shoes. I saw a co-sleeper that looked like a very small pack-n-play that goes in the center of the bed. He can see out, but he is still separate from you. I don't know if they go up to the size of a 4 month old, but it maybe worth looking into. Maybe if he gets use to being the the bed, but not touching you, it maybe able to transfer him back to his bed. Or you can try putting a pack-n-play next to your bed so he's in the room, but not in the bed. We let our daughter CIO, which I know it not for everyone, but it worked for us when it came time to her waking up in the middle of the night after going to bed. It was painful to listen to, but only lasted 3 days. But I think you are smart to try something now, my sister is in the same situation, but her son is now 15 months. BTW, we always put our daughter down awake, so she could learn to self-sooth.

What I've done for my kids is start a bedtime routine, bath, book, bed.... Then lay them down in crib. Then roll on side and pat their back, shushing or white noise... Until they are asleep. Then roll them on their back and have white noise or soothing water noises play.

They cry, but less and less each night. I'm with them when they cry, but not in bed with them, etc. I feel better that in stay with them, vs cio method. You have to make sure they are on back sleeping when done.

Oh, i also swaddle. But 4 mos may be too big for swaddling. If they flail arms and legs, if you lay your arm on them lightly, mine tend to calm down. It's hard though.....

You have to sleep, make that your primary goal. I personally cannot sleep with a child in my bed and all the big fans of co sleeping seem to forget that we are all different and what is best for one family is not best for another. Good mommies are not exhausted and cranky! and infants with developing brains need to get plenty of sleep and nap during the day. Just get it in your head the next few weeks will be difficult but the change will make your life better for years to come. STOP putting him in your bed, rock him, pat his back whatever you need to do. Yes you will lose sleep and have some difficult nights but keep in mind the "big " picture. When he learns to sleep alone in his own bed he will start napping better. watch super nanny and see how many families are fighting with their preschool and school age children over bedtime because they didnt teach them at a younger age! Good luck!