Bragging Rights, How Much to Share About Kids Accomplishments

Updated on January 06, 2016
J.J. asks from Lancaster, NY
17 answers

I'm typically not a braggart, but Facebook seems to be made for sharing stuff not only about yourself but also kids. I don't see a lot of people on a day to day basis because I work quite a bit from home so I communicate quite a bit online.
I do post videos of my dd's performances every couple of months and share her straight A's on Facebook...
But I got to thinking after the holidays when my cousin talked ALL night (in person not on FB) about how his son (age 10) is a contender for the "big leagues" in baseball (ahem!) much is too much?
What do you share about your kids and when do you draw the line on bragging rights?

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answers from San Francisco on

I treat Facebook like real life. I think being proud and sharing kids' accomplishments is perfectly normal (and I like seeing/hearing about what other families are doing.)
And just like like real life, some people either overshare or think their kids are smarter or more talented than they actually are.
Not much you can do about it, you can't really control other peoples' actions/emotions/habits.

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answers from Washington DC on

I am a mom above all else. I also have an MBA, have a great career, an amazing family, etc. My friends on FB are people who love my family as well - and if they don't, they don't need to be my FB friend. Ask anyone who views my page, 99% of what I put on there is about my kids and my life...I don't get on there to fight politics or anything.

I would share if either of my sons (8 and 10) were contenders for big league baseball. Actually, they both made the all star teams for their leagues last year and I absolutely shared that with people who love them.

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answers from Chicago on

I rarely post things I FB.

My kids are still young and I think they still have a right to privacy.

I think it's great to share accomplishments with people who cannt be present at the event or who live distant. But I think the accomplishments mean more when told in person.

I have a relative who posts every single thing her daughter does (even posted a picture of her filling out a job application ??????). Everything. But sadly, she has another daughter then only gets posted about 20% of the time.

I don't get that, nor do I get the need to know every single detail about the older daughters life, or the relative's need for constant validation of her parenting.

So I take her off my live feed, and figure if it's that important or worth knowing they can call. Otherwise I feel like I am just another member of her 'fan club'.

7 moms found this helpful


answers from Norfolk on

I hate Facebook so I share nothing through that medium.
If I'm ASKED how our son is doing - I try to keep it to no more than 5 minutes of gushing over his accomplishments and grades.
I don't want to say too much because peoples eyes start glazing over fairly quickly - and I don't want to make them feel bad that their kid isn't doing as well as mine.
"My son brought home straight A's again and earned 3 college credits in high school last semester!" doesn't exactly compare to "My grandson made bail!" if you know what I mean.

Of course you have to consider your audience.
I'll talk a LOT longer about it with my Mom - she wants to hear about everything so SHE can brag about her grandson to HER friends - and grandmothers are notorious about this sort of thing.

7 moms found this helpful


answers from Portland on

I don't share anything about grades. I have so many friends who's kids struggle, I don't see the point. And to me, that's just expected in our house - to do your best.
I post very few pictures on Facebook. I tend to just text pictures to my close friends/family group instead of posting them. I used to change the audience on Facebook - but that grew tiresome, so now I only post family pictures - usually if I change my cover page photo, etc. Or funny ones. Where we look like idiots typically. We're more that type of family - sharing a laugh more than anything.

6 moms found this helpful


answers from Boston on

I never post grades on FB. Sorry, but I think that's obnoxious. You wouldn't put your performance review from work on there, right? Grades are something private - if a kid gets high honors and it's in the newspaper or something then I guess that's different but I cringe when people post about their kids' grades.

In general, I don't post results of tryouts and such (or even talk about them online or in real life) because I know that there are other kids my kids and I know who didn't make the team, or the band, or the play. Now once they're on a team or in a play or something and I'm actually at a game or performance I'll sometimes post about the results or share a photo or short video clip. Same thing with things such as inductions into the National Honor Society - I shard a photo of our child and her friends dressed up for the event and congratulated all the students who had earned that distinction. Less about our kid and more about sharing a positive community event.

My SD won an essay contest last year at the state level that earned her a trip to Washington, D.C. to complete on a national level and of course I shared that, but it was also covered by our local paper, her school, etc. as she was the first contestant from our region to win the state contest. Her robotics team also earned a spot at a national competition a few years ago and I shared that too, but that was also covered by the papers and the school because it was a big deal and the first time they made it that far.

6 moms found this helpful


answers from Pittsburgh on

I have different friend lists set up on FB. I do share by kids accomplishments - with the people who love him and will care, like grandparents and aunts. I don't share that stuff with everyone I'm FB friends with because people I'm more casual friends with wouldn't really care.

ETA: I do agree with those who say it's your FB page, post what you want. If a person doesn't want to read about your kid's accomplishments, they can skip over reading it. Personally, I'd rather read about my friends' kids' accomplishments, even if it's over the top, than read some of the political stuff I've seen lately. But you know what - not wanting to read the political stuff is my problem, and I have simply un-followed a few people until after the election, and that's ok. That's the good thing about FB. People can post anything, and the reader chooses what they want to read.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from St. Louis on

Good question, on FB almost none at all.

If your child is in front of the right audience, they don't need you to build a name for them.

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answers from Washington DC on

when they do something unusually awesome (or dorky) i do. maybe it's different when your kids are grown.
when you say your cousin talked ALL night, does that mean there was 30-post string of FB posts? or it happened face to face? i'm not sure how someone brags 'all night' on facebook.
i mean, all of us roll their eyes at parents who are clearly living their own glory days through their kids, or have no other topic of conversation. but my FB is mine to post what i feel like, and people are free to scroll past, right? i'm sure some people are tired of my political posts, or my witchy posts, or my horsey posts, or my 'braggy' pics of the farm when i think it's particularly pretty.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

I think the occasional interesting or funny video is fine but I'm not sure about sharing her report cards. They are her grades to share, after all, not yours.

It's hard not to brag about one's kids, but it's kind of tiresome to be on the other end of it.

And once you are done parenting, if you didn't realize it before, you really realize at that point that your kids are not you, and not an extension of you. Parents should probably try to spend more of their time creating more of their own accomplishments, and not living vicariously through their children. But a little bragging is ok.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Fayetteville on

Facebook is for ME...not my kids/family (my husband chooses not to have an account). I post very little about my kids--most of what people post tends to come off as bragging. I, personally, could care less about straight As. Straight As doesn't tell me she's a good person, since you don't get a grade for kind, considerate, helpful, etc. There is a girl in my son's class that is straight A's, but also the biggest bully at school.
EVERYONE loves their kid(s) and think they're the greatest! I'd say keep most of it to yourself--less is definitely more:)

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answers from Boston on

You can share anything you want since its your fb page however I do reserve the right to eye roll and make comments under my breath when someone posts one stupid thing after another. I guess you need to decide for yourself what you are sharing and why you are sharing it. My kid's straight A report card? Wouldn't share it. My kid's home run at a baseball game? Would share. Vacation pics, day trip, ice cream all over their face? Would share.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Springfield on

i don't share my life on fb. i will brag about a few accomplishments that my kids have and some of my hubbies house remodeling finishes. but only in person and only to people who matter. just today i saw an old friend (that i haven't talked to in about 10 years) and didn't brag about anything. just talked about how the kids were getting old and how the schoolyear was flying by

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answers from Santa Barbara on

In my opinion it is OK to brag and share all you want about your kids on FB, as long as you share the "not so good stuff" too. Keep it fair. I find that FB brags are so one percent of the truth and reality in people's lives. I only put on FB what I believe is OK to go on CNN on any news media. Privacy is still important to me. But to each his own.

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answers from New York on

Except 1:1 with a friend with a child in a similar situation, I never talk about my kids' accomplishments. How is it different than posting or telling people my bonus or annual income? That would be considered rude if it's larger than most of my friends'. Or tacky even if it's not. So I post I just made a ton of money this year and a friend who is struggling to pay her bills comes across that? I think everyone would agree that's obnoxious and insensitive. So why is it different when it comes to our kids? Parents of kids who are struggling are already worried about it and aware. I don't think anyone needs to remind them other kids are doing so much better. I wouldn't even post if my child was valedictorian of Stanford. I'm also a believer in the saying "pride comes before a fall." Your kid is doing so great and then bamn, they get depressed or into drugs. If you'd post all about that too, then more ok to post about grades now. But I hate the culture of posting about the good and hiding the bad.

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answers from Phoenix on

It's your fb page so share whatever you want, as much as you want. If people don't like what you post, they can unfollow you. No worries.

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answers from Washington DC on

FB is the photoshopped highlights of our lives. I think that as long as you are not inflating their achievements and aren't bragging how they hung the moon every day, you're fine.

1 mom found this helpful
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