Bladder Issue for Mom

Updated on August 31, 2009
S.P. asks from Mount Juliet, TN
36 answers

This is soooo embarrassing. Ever since my youngest daughter was born (she weighed 10 pounds), I have noticed that if I am running or doing something else strenuous like a hard sneeze, for instance. I leak a bit of urine. It has nothing to do with having to actually use the bathroom. Most of the time, it is only when I sneeze or cough hard that I have the problem. But lately, I've started running again (I have no problem when I walk), and by the end of my running session my pants are soaked, even if I just used the bathroom.

I have decided that when I go to the gym or out for a run, the only way I can save face is to wear one of those thin maxi pads. I try to do kegals as much as possible to tighten that area, and my husband has no complaints in the sexual dept. with tightness.

Have any of you dealt with this? I have noticed that as I get older it seems to get a little worse. It is a horrible feeling to not have control when I am at a gym and I feel it slowly leak out no matter what I do while I'm running.

Is there surgery that can be performed? If so, has anyone had it and what were the results? How expensive is it? My OB-GYN is male and I am embarassed bring it up. I know, I should just spit it out, but it either slips my mind or I just feel strange about it. I know that's what they do and what they are there for. Maybe if I got some good feedback about it here, I will call a specialist about it. You would think that after almost 8 years it would improve, but not so.

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L.H.

answers from Jacksonville on

If kegals aren't making much of an impact you can actually see a physical or occupational therapist who can do e-stim to that area and it will strengthen the muscles to prevent the leakage. Just call around to adult therapy clinics and see if there is anyone there trained in that area. You then just need a doctor's referral to be evaluated and treated. More often I believe it is physical therapists who treat this. Good Luck!
L.

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E.M.

answers from Louisville on

talk to your obgyn if you arnt comfortable talking to a male about it then find a female gyno. im kind of surprised that you arent comfortable with your doctor. you need to have a good relationship with him and be honest or your doctor cant help you

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M.W.

answers from Huntington on

Did you have an episiotomy or a tear with the birth? Kegels would be my suggestion, but since kegels aren't helping, it may be a torn muscle that didn't get repaired, or was repaired improperly. If the muscle was intact and it was just a matter of toning it, kegels WOULD help. This problem (lax muscle tone, resulting in stress incontinence) happens as we age, whether or not we have had vaginal births. (A study found it equally prevalent in nuns!)so I disagree with several iof the other posters who blame vaginal births for their problem. But if the muscle was completely torn through (a 3rd degree tear, which IS the result of birth, specifically, forcefully pushing a baby out, instead of panting the baby out slowly and gently. BTW, 1st & 2nd degree tears usually heal well enough without stitches, and do not cause stress incontinence). With this type perineal injury, the two ends of the muscle are completely torn through, don't meet so cannot heal properly unless sutured back together adequately after the birth.
Yes reconstructive surgery is possible, it should help a lot, if not cure it entirely. I have no idea how much it would cost, just know it's possible.
You should not be embarrassed by any physical defect or injury. it's not your fault and needs to be remedied! If your ob/gyn being a male embarrases you switch to a female one.

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K.P.

answers from Memphis on

Sometimes when we do Kegels, it's not done accurately, so we miss out on the most benefit of it -- maybe you can look for some more detailed info about how to do them that will help you in this department. But it is a very COMMON problem (even if you haven't had children -- that's what "Depends" were made for). If you are embarrassed to bring it up to the doctor, when you call and make your appt, tell the receptionist that you have some concerns about urinary incontinence [believe me, it's not going to be embarrassing to ANY of the office staff because they deal with it so much], and then the doctor will probably ask you about it when he sees it in your file.

I used to work at a pharmacy, and people would be SOOOO embarrassed about getting stuff for hemorrhoids, diarrhea (unless for a child), lice (even though their child caught it from a schoolmate), yeast infection, bladder infection, etc., etc., but we never gave it a second thought -- that stuff was just too common! It was just another day at work for us -- it was a pharmacy -- people who had bodily problems is what kept us in our jobs!

1 mom found this helpful
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N.G.

answers from Fayetteville on

S.,
I think you're awesome for bringing something this private to light. My mom's got the same issue, has for years. She's now 64 and just crosses her legs tightly when she sneezes. She won't see her doctor about it. I hear it's normal for that to happen to a lot of women after childbirth. It doesn't hurt to ask your OB/GYN. You think it's the first time they've heard about it? You'll feel much better when you do. Good luck to you! =)

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R.U.

answers from Nashville on

your ob is the one to talk to. he will put your bladder in a sling. your problem is one of the benifts of having children. ha ha. good luck, mom of 7, R.

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D.L.

answers from Greensboro on

S.,
Don't be embarassed. I am a Certified Nurse Midwife and this is a very common problem. I just wanted to add that a non-surgical & less expensive alternative to surgery that may be worth trying is a vaginal pessary. It's a small silicone device (like a diaphragm) that sits in the vagina & provides support-used for urinary stress/urge incontinence. If it fits properly you are not aware of it.

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S.R.

answers from Nashville on

I finally just went to my doctor about the same thing. She told me it was a structural issue and can happen post pregnancy or just with age (it started when I was 48). Surgery is not a good first option, nor are drugs (like Vesicare) yet until you've first tried muscle tightening exercises. Whether you're sitting (driving, at a desk, etc.) or standing (while cooking, in the showere, etc.), tighten your bladder muscle as hard as you can 10 times in a row, then 20 times in a row as you get stronger. As you get into a habit of exercising this sphincter muscle, it improves quickly. I struggled with running to the bathroom or leaking for 2 years until it got embarrassingly bad. I went to physical therapy for my lower back. I did excercises for my "core muscles". My P.T. said some therapists are especially trained to deal with bladder control issues. I was completely better after just 2 weeks of these excercises. Now I can hold it for 2 hours if I'm shopping and I don't leak if I sneeze. Yea!!! S.

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V.C.

answers from Wheeling on

Your doctor looks at your body in the same way that a mechanic looks at a car. Either buck up and say what needs to be said, or get a lady doctor. I've never had an OB/GYN (even while having 4 kids and menopause -- I'm 52), but I do now have a woman physician.

You might try standing up, bending way over, and letting your bladder drain a little more at the end of urinating especially before running/exercising. I know my mom had to do this for years and now I have to do it sometimes.

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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A.R.

answers from Knoxville on

Just tell your doctor. You wouldn't be the first person to have this problem. Last month I had to have a rectal exam because I suspected I had hemroids. I was so embarassed. But it is over now and I am glad I said something. Nothing like a big light shining wear the sun doesn't shine with an audience.

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L.T.

answers from Fayetteville on

Hi S.,

Yes, there is a surgery for this. Don't wait - go see an OB/GYN! There is no reason to needlessly suffer from something that is,usually, very easy to correct. Cost, etc. will depend on exactly what the surgeon needs to do and what type of insurance you have. I think the bigger problem is that you are uncomfortable talking with your current doctor. If it's the fact that he's male, switch to a woman. You should feel comfortable talking to your doctor about any medical problem you may have. Good luck! L.

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N.J.

answers from Owensboro on

Hi, S..

I am taking a medication called Enablex for bladder control problems. This happened about four years ago. My family doctor and my ob/gyn both said that there are many reasons that this happens but for me none of the traditional reasons fit the bill. They said that I fall into the category that some women who give birth just have this happen to them for no apparent reason. It is something that happens to a lot of people. I felt bad until my doctor and ob/gyn explained that this happens to a lot of women and sometimes it can not be explained why it happens. But taking Enablex has really helped me and I only occasionally have problems, especially when I am stressed out. I tried taking Oxybutin but it dried me out so much I stayed hoarse, could not sing and always had a dry mouth. Once I switched to Enablex it has been great.

Definitely talk to your doctor/ob/gyn about this. It is more common than you realize in women who have given birth. Thankfully there are ways for it to be treated. Praying for you. Have a blessed day.

Blessings,
N.

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T.M.

answers from Charleston on

I am 31 and have two children. My oldest is 7 and youngest just turned 2. I had a c-section with the first and vaginal delivery with the second. I have the same issues. Hearing water run will sometimes make me feel the need to go. I also leak when I sneeze or cough. Just last night I tried to jump on the trampolen with my 7 year old, and I had just emptied my bladder, but I was soaked and there was no controll of it. It just kept coming and there shouldn't have been anything there. My husband keeps telling me that I need to tell the doctor. I have just been putting it off. I will have an apt in Oct with my GYN for an annual visit so I guess I will need to tell him then. He had told me right after delivery that my bladder had slightly dropped. I was in labor for 36 hours and pushed for two and a half.

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C.L.

answers from Memphis on

I have the same problem and have been doing kagels. I know it's going to take some time but I believe it is helping.
I use a pad just incase. Good luck.
Have a great day, take care and God Bless ya.

C.

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C.R.

answers from Knoxville on

The kegals will help to strengthen. It gets worse as you get older. It is hard to bring it up at the dr. Try this, write down questions you have on an index card. When you go to the doctor and the nurse brings you in mention it to her. Possibly give her the card with Q's, and make sure you get an answer. Your other option would be to bring it up to your GP. You could maybe just call and ask the GP's office what type doctor would deal with leaky bladder issues. The could point you in the right direction. If you seek a specialist make sure it is someone you are comfortable with. You will need to bare it all with them. My best friends mother had to have her bladder tied up years ago. I am not sure if this is something they still do. It was because she had 6 children and all that pregnancy was h*** o* her bladder. I would definetly seek medical intervention.

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A.M.

answers from Asheville on

Hi S. - I don't have any information regarding the incontinence issue, but I would highly recommend that, if your ob/gyn practice has a female doctor, that you switch. And if they don't, talk to friends or try and get recommends for a good female doctor. There will be more issues in the future and you want to feel comfortable discussing them. I have had both male and female ob's and have loved all of my doctor's, but I now have a female doctor for the very fact that I know there will be issues that as I age I'll feel more comfortable discussing with a female doctor. I have a female ped for my daughter because, even though it has no consequence now, I think she might feel more comfortable as she enters her teen years confiding in a female doctor. Good luck. I'm sure this is a much more common issue than we realize and I'm sure there are things that can be done deal with it.

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L.B.

answers from Asheville on

Maybe you haven't been viewing enough tv commercials lately re your bladder problem (just kiddin'!) ... there are seversal prescription meds on the market for it. I've tried a few on my doctor's advise because I have nighttime urgency; occasionally daytime too if I'm out somewhere, haven't gone to the bathroom for a couple hours maybe ... so I make sure wherever I am I can find a facility quickly. It was my experience with the meds, however, that they weren't effective in my case and also had some side effects I didn't want to deal with so I quit them (maybe the fact that I'm a senior had something to do with the meds' not working well); the doctor told me he has other patients who had the same experience with them, too; so the end result is that I wear incontinence pads at night, and
if I'm out somewhere for a lengthy time I wear lighter pads.
And as far as being shy about bringing up this problem with your ob-gyn, just resign yourself to do it ... take a deep breath, look him in the eye, and out with it ... doubtlessly, in his "business" he's heard about it (and far, far worse complaints)from numerous other ladies. Not only will your "confession" be a relief to you, but will be a big step toward doing something medically about the problem. Best of luck!

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J.C.

answers from Lexington on

I had surgery years ago. My bladder had dropped and things just got worse as time went on. I went to an urologist and he did surgery and it has been many years since and I have done great. It could be just a simple thing, you might not have to have surgery. Don't wait until you get older, do it now. Good luck! J.

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K.S.

answers from Raleigh on

You should have a woman doc. much nicer. Yes, plenty of women have your problem. Ask around for a good urologist. Go for a consult. You can call first and ask what you are asking us, or just go and talk with them. It is a fairly simple surgery, and it works! Don't waste time dripping, get it done and enjoy life.

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J.T.

answers from Louisville on

Oh S., we sooo know what you mean!!! First of all, yes it's normal, do we have to live with it??? Maybe not. There are lots of treatments out there in our day and age to help take care of life's little "impositions..." So please don't be embarrased to talk to your GYN. Chances are he's heard that and many worse...I could even tell you some stories that I don't think the patients have stopped blushing or crying over yet! For us in healthcare, it's not a big deal...for one, we've had the same problems ourselves before! It's natural to be embarrassed but seriously, he will forget you told him 10 minutes after you leave. They stay very very busy! If it helps, I had a family practice doctor as my doctor, male, and after he did my Pap and pelvic, 2 weeks later I went to work in his clinic as his nurse! Never mentioned anything except to let me know he had gotten the results back on my vaginal ultrasound!!! It's all business to them so try not to worry too terribly much about his response. I hope this helps and I wish you the very best!

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A.T.

answers from Wilmington on

Just went through all this myself. When I went to the dr., she referred me to a physical therapist for women. It was great because I learned a lot of why we have these issues. I am going through menopause and using some of the natural hormones. Sometimes these issues will cause leakage, too. With the therapy, they taught me the proper way to kegal. She would have me do 10 quick kegals, 10 where you hold them for a certain amount of time, and then there is a device that is like a tenz unit that is inserted into the vagina and stimulates a kegal. That strengthens the muscles and forces you to kegal. Quite an interesting experience! She would hook this up to a computer and you could actually see how well you are kegaling. They also showed me various exercises that you can do to strengthen those muscles. It is also all about working it into your day and doing them--consciously or unconsciously. I would highly recommend you seek out a woman's physical therapist that may specialize in this area. Your insurance may cover it as mine did. Good luck!

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B.L.

answers from Jacksonville on

This isn't anything to be embarrassed about - it's very common. A friend of mine had a new surgery/procedure done a couple of years ago to correct her problem. As far as I know, it worked. You might do a little research on the latest procedures and go armed with that to your ob/gyn. He may refer you to a urologist. There should be help for you; with modern medicine, we just shouldn't have to live with this sort of thing.

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R.W.

answers from Charlotte on

Hey, S.! I have this same problem and have had it for many years. After the birth of my second child, (each of my children weighed 9 pounds or better) I noticed that sex was a little different and whenever I sneezed or coughed or ran I would leak some. At my 6 week check up my doctor brought it up to me because he noticed that my bladdar had fallen. He said the words, not me. He said he could do surgery and tack it back up, but until I was done having children, I needed to wait. He said childbirth would just make it fall again and it is major surgery. Check with your doctor and see what he says.

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T.H.

answers from Louisville on

I think this is a common thing for women. I too have this problem since I have had my 2 children. I know other moms who also have it. I wouldn't be so embarrassed. I do believe it is common. I still have it and my youngest daughter is 4 years old. So don't feel embarrassed. I will read your responses for myself as well. Good Luck...

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E.W.

answers from Chattanooga on

S.,

You need to get over your embarassment of talking to your OB. If you feel that uncomfortable with him then look for a woman OB. You let him examine you, why would you let this bother you to talk to him.

Anyway, this is a common problem. I have it, my mother had it all my sisters have it or had it. I don't have it to severe I just be careful when I sneeze or do something strenuous. My mother had to have her insides picked up. She had 6 rather large children and her ligaments that held her lower organs in place were stretched a little to far and didn't retain their elasticity. The doctor fixed her up on that one. That was years ago and I am sure they have come up with new ways to handle the problem. You cannot wait. It may be as simple as adding a few more exercises to your routine or some medication. Two of my sisters used holistic/natural medicines to relieve this. That can work too.

Good luck and go to the doctor.

E.

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L.M.

answers from Greensboro on

Please try not to be embarrassed. You are not alone. I'm 40 and have had 3 vaginal deliveries. I am very fit and I love to exercise, except for the fact that I wet my pants anytime I run or jump. My (male)OBGYN has seen and heard it all and was very informative and helpful. After he did a physical exam, he said my bladder actually wasn't that bad, but suggested exercises. With my busy life I could never remember to do them so he recently prescribed Detrol LA. After just a few days, I can see a difference when I need to urinate. In the past, I would leak a bit if my bladder was very full and I was holding it, trying to reach the bathroom. That hasn't happened since starting the medication. As far as working out, I still leaked some the first day, but I'm hoping that my next workout will be dry. Good luck.

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J.D.

answers from Raleigh on

I have the same issues and you really shouldn't be embarassed to bring it up to your GYN. I made a joke of it and told him "I pee my pants", lol. He laughed at the fact I made a joke of it but he said it is very common with people who have had children. What they send you to do is really embarassing though. They will send you to a urologist to do a urodynamics test which is basically they put a catheter in and fill your bladder with water and ask you questions. Then, you pee it out in a bucket. This apparently tells them what they need to know. Alot of women have to get a hammok looking thing inserted under their bladder because it tilts. They sent me to a physical therapist which is pretty much pointless so I stopped going. I do my keigals and they don't work, so I was paying alot of money to go and have them give me exercises that don't work. I don't know what the next step is...good luck!

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S.R.

answers from Chattanooga on

I too am a homeschooling mom. Looks like we have more than one issue in common! I believe it is to do w/ the muscles that surround the bottom of your bladder. The muscles are weak and the urine leaks out. You are supposed to do keagles. Sorry if that isn't spelled correctly. Try doing them over 100 times a day. And it should start to tighten them up. If after sometime it doesn't seem to be helping then you might want to see your Dr. to make sure you don't need something else done. Hope this helps some.

M.Z.

answers from Nashville on

I S., I am so glad I read you post today. I have a best friend who went through this 3 years ago and had a common surgery for this called a "Bladder Sling." Her doctor was not going to be in town when she scheduled the surgery and his partner stepped in and did the surgery but he did a few extra things. He used something called "mesh" in the procedure. She has had a lot of problems and in research has found about 1,000 other women suffering as she has. She has lots of information and knows great doctors. She has spent the last 3 years tring to undo that surgery. Please email me ____@____.com and I will give you her email address so that you can talk to her. She is a very caring and sincere, a school teacher, and a mom too.

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi S.,

I know that is a bad feeling. I would say you should switch doctors to a female if you are uncomfortable discussing the topic. Is this the doctor who delivered your girls? I'm sure he sees that all the time. I have friends who complain of the same thing, especially one who runs (mine were all born c-section which has it's own difficulties like the sagging belly over the incision that won't go away.) I think it is a common problem and I am sure I have even read in baby books not to be surprised if that happens, which means the Dr will not be surprised and there may be a good solution to the problem you are missing out on. I know we become attached to our doctors, especially the ones who deliver our babies, but if you aren't going to have more babies, you might consider switching to a female who could have had the same experience. I have a male Dr too who is extremely popular and very difficult to get an appt. with so when I went in for birth control after having my 3rd child, I ended up only being able to get an appt with a female dr and I like her so much and found conversation surprisingly easier. It was much better than I expected and I will see her again. I also know another female Dr who is fabulous if you live near the Raleigh area. Or you could do more research on the web or library before you go back in. Hope you can find some relief!!!

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B.H.

answers from Knoxville on

I had a similar problem myself and went to my OB-GYN, the problem was that my bladder had dropped due to the muscles being streched in childbirth and also due to heavy lifting. The doctor performed surgery and did a bladder tac. The problem was solved and now I don't have that embarrassing problem.

Carol

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W.M.

answers from Nashville on

Don't be embarrassed, it is VERY common. It is called incontinence so if you want to bring it up to your doc using the medical term it may be easier. There are more reasons for it than just birthing so you really should talk to your doc about it. Or, now that you know the medical term, google it and see if there are any ways to improve it.

Good luck!

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P.B.

answers from Raleigh on

Do your Kegals!
Seriously. It will srengthen all the muscles of your pelvic floor. It may or may not completely solve the problem, but it is free & good for you!

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J.T.

answers from Johnson City on

You are certainly not alone. I had this problem while pregnant to an extreme. My pants would be soaked just from standing up! My OB said that 70 percent of women have this problem long after pregnancy. I guess we are all just embarresed to talk about it.As for correcting the problem, you really need to talk to your OB. If the problem is due to bladder prolapse they can tack your bladder up and releave the pressure. It may be due to to urethra being stretched out in pregnancy in which case the kegels will help.

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R.G.

answers from Louisville on

S., as you've already seen, Kegal exercises can greatly improve your condition. In some cases, the exercises can completely eliminate symptoms. But, since you already have heard from others on that issue, I'm not here to talk about that.

What I would like you to know is that this stress urinary incontinence may be a lot more common than you think. The primary cause of the weak bladder is vaginal childbirth, which weakens both the muscles in the pelvic floor and the sphyncter of the urethra which hold the bladder closed until you are ready to eliminate, as well as the muscles above the bladder which push the urine out. (If these upper muscles are unable to completely empty the bladder, you are left with a not completely emptied bladder and there tends to be some leakage as the excess urine slowly dribbles out. Oh! By the way, professional singers tend to have less trouble with this sort of thing simply because strong abdominal and diaphragm muscles are a requirement for their stock-in-trade so, if you enjoy singing, do more of it and work those muscles while you have fun doing it!) It is estimated that about 40 - 50% of women who have had a vaginal delivery will experience some degree of mild to moderate urinary incontinence. So chances are, at least 25 - 35% of all women you pass on the street are dealing with the same problem! (You've seen those commercials with all of the 'pipe people'? You are not alone!) Don't be embarrassed by it and DO talk to your ob-gyn. He or she can discuss with you the severity of your condition and the best options for treating it. As questions about Kegals as well as other intervention options. (There is, in fact, a device which can be inserted in the vagina and which is connected to a machine which will stimulate contraction of the muscles to help you learn how to properly do the Kegals. (this is done in the doctor's office)) There are also varying degrees of chemical (Rx such as Ditropan ) and medical interventions(implanted devices such as a pessary, and surgical slings and tacs) to help depending upon how severe your symptoms are.

It has always been my opinion that obstetricians should regularly include education on the repurcussions of vaginal delivery on the surrounding muscles and start their patients on Kegal exercises PRIOR TO delivery (1st trimester preferably) to offset the effects after delivery. I find the fact that most OB's do not to be a failure to provide complete care to their patients. In fact, treatments should be included as part of the cost of delivery.

Bottom line: Don't be embarrassed. Do talk to your doctor.

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