Biting Issues !

Updated on May 07, 2007
W.B. asks from Akron, OH
5 answers

My grand daughter goes over to my ex's house, and his girlfriend has a grand-daughter who is 4yrs. old and seems to keep on biting Brooklynn, where they are during these times I'm not sure? I think she's too old to be doing this, and need some advice on what to tell Brooklynn to get Careona to stop biting her. Any suggestions, without me being present? She doesn't go their very often, but when I picked her up from daycare on Tuesday she showed me what Careona did to her, and it is bruised and you can actually see teeth marks. I never had this problems with my kids, or it being done to them, but any suggestions would help, please!

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So What Happened?

Thanks for all the advice! I did let my ex know this is going on and I'm not happy, and we'll see? My grand-daughter is very out going and I believe will take care of it herself if no one does. Careona has been at my house for a few gatherings that Brooklynn has asked me to invite her too, and never has been bad for me. I believe if she's not watched or gets attention she is trying to get it? Maybe I'm wrong, but negative attention for some kids is better then none to them. She's a sweet little girl, and doesn't have the greatest home life, and I keep that in my mind too before making too big of a deal about it yet. I just never had this kind of thing happened with my own kids, so thought to seek some advice out their.

More Answers



answers from Cleveland on

I would talk to your ex about this. Tell them that the girlfriend's granddaughter is biting your granddaughter. They need to know what is going on. My brother, who is now 29 yrs old, was still biting at that age. Eventually, he grew out of it



answers from Columbus on

Definitely speak to your ex, as uncomfortable as that may be. I would be furious if my daughter was bruised and had teeth marks from another child..that is a serious health concern. If he acts like it isn't a big deal, she shouldn't be allowed over there until it is addressed.



answers from Cleveland on

ok its gonna be hard to do without being present but i will try. ok you can tell her to tell her grandpa that careona is biting her and it hurts. i could only hope that would help. if it doesnt though, your gonna have to call him at the least and tell him that, that little girl is biting brooklynn and it needs to stop or brooklynn will end up biting her or other kids because no one is stoping careona. best of luck!!!



answers from Dayton on

i think most kids go through a biting stage, but you are right when you say that 4 is too old to be doing this. by this time, they do understand consequences to their actions, so there must be something satisfying to careona about inflicting pain on brooklynn. i'm wondering if it is a jealousy issue? if you bring this up to your ex, i would suggest that he put in extra effort to give each girl individual attention while they are in his care until this blows over. that way, careona doesn't feel like she has to compete for attention and get mad enough to bite when she doesn't get it. i hope this helps!



answers from Columbus on

These are hard ages. I would sit down with your grand daughter and tell her that its very important that she uses her words to tell any child that is harming her to stop. I would teach her how to forcefully say "DO NOT BITE ME", or "STOP BITING ME NOW". Ive read that children can sense who they can pick on and who they cant by reactions. If your grand daughter doesnt stand up for herself the other child may keep harming her simply because she can. It will also help your grand daughter to feel confident that she can stand up for herself. That is very important because most of the time if she is in a situation where she is being picked on or harmed, it will be when she is not around other adults.

I would also talk to your ex like the earlier post said. Tell him what is happening and that you have instructed your grand daughter to not only stand up for herself, but to inform you if this behavior doesnt stop.

It is very hard to see your child or grandchild being harmed by another child, but with that being said, this little girl is also very young. 4 years old is still a very immature age. My Dr told me that kids dont not fully understand the the consequenses of their actions until they are about 5. So she may know that biting isnt nice, but she may not understand that "when I bite someone it hurts them very badly". So its important that an adult explain to her that under no circumstances is it ok to hurt another person. And biting hurts.
Unfortunatly all of our kids are going to face situations like this. All we can do is try and teach them how to handle themselves, because in the end, we need them to be able to resolve problems on their own.
If that doesnt work, just tell her to bite the other little girl back... she wont do it anymore after that!!! (just kidding)!

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