Biting - Bismarck,ND

Updated on June 08, 2011
J.J. asks from Bismarck, ND
8 answers

Another biting question!

My daughter(17 months) has recently started biting me. She usually does it when she's feeling playful and gigles when she does it. I've tried looking her in the face and telling her firmly "No". I've tried moving her arm so that she bites herself. I've even tried biting her back but all my attempts end in her just laughing. How do I let her know that biting is not alright when all she does is laugh?

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

I would say a sharp "NO!" and put her down and walk away. Let her cry and don't comfort her. I believe at this age, this is the best way for her to "get" that biting means Mommy won't play with her.

Good luck,
D.

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

She obviously thinks you're playing when you respond physically, so don't do that. I agree that putting her down and walking away with a sharp "NO BITE!" will work faster than anything. Biting her back will only reinforce her belief that this is something people do.

BTW, I also trained a rough cat to stop biting and scratching this way. It worked quickly.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.L.

answers from Philadelphia on

I'm with Heather D. Ignoring it worked best for us. For most toddlers any attention is reinforcing. So if we were playing and my son hit or bit me I just got up and did something else and ignored him. It didn't take very long before he stopped. Now he's 2 and we do time outs on occasion for the behavior, so that might work too.

2 moms found this helpful

C.W.

answers from Las Vegas on

I agree with Peg... once you bit her back, just hit the reset button cuz everything went out the window. Does she like to read? Get her the board book teeth are not for biting. I didn't buy it but I told my daughter that when she used to bite. I'd firmly say teeth are NOT for biting... and she stopped biting about the 5th time. She had an episode a few days later she had an episode and bit my dad while she was sitting on him so he said Grandpa doesn't like it when you bite and put her down off his lap. He then said when you can stop biting grandpa you can sit on me again. She hasn't bitten since.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.R.

answers from Davenport on

I agree with the others, a Firm "NO BITE", put her down, and walk away. When she follows you, tell her, "Biting HURTS, mommy doesn't play when you hurt me". Follow through and do it every time, IGNORE her for a short period after she does it ( I mean, obviously still pay attention to the kid, watch her, but don't give her any more interaction/fun time with you for a short time) to show her biting is not a fun game.

If this tactic doesn't work after consistently applying it, then I would say, at first bite, take her and put her in a pack and play or crib for about 2 minutes of a "time out", with no interaction from you.

2 moms found this helpful
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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

I found that ignoring it worked best for my biter. I think she mainly did it because she found that biting eased teething so she sort of stuck with it. There are behaivor books out their specifically written for toddlers regarding biting. This one comes to mind http://www.amazon.com/Teeth-Biting-Board-Book-Behavior/dp...

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T.C.

answers from Des Moines on

tell her NO then walk away to another room. Ignore her for a few minutes.

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C.W.

answers from Sioux City on

1. Remain calm. Do not react with anger.
2. You need to determine why the child is biting. Is the child teething? Is s/he trying to learn about his/her world through oral exploration (putting things in his/her mouth and learning how they taste, feel, etc.)? Is the child biting to gain control or in self-defense? Is s/he stressed, anxious, frustrated, angry, or excited? Is s/he engaging in attention-seeking behavior?
3. Once you know the reason that the child is biting, you need to respond appropriately.
A. If the child is teething, you should provide him/her with suitable things on which s/he can chew.
B. If the child is trying to learn about his/her world through oral exploration, tell the child that biting is not appropriate behavior. Explain to the child that biting hurts and is not nice. Provide the child with alternate means to learn about whatever s/he was biting.
C. If the child is trying to gain control or is acting in self-defense, tell the child that biting is not appropriate behavior. Explain to the child that biting hurts and is not nice. Then, determine why the child feels like s/he lacks control or feels threatened or attacked. Provide the child with alternate means to secure a measure of control over his/her circumstance or to communicate to you that s/he is feeling threatened or attacked.
D. If the child is stressed, anxious, frustrated, angry, or excited, tell the child that biting is not appropriate behavior. Explain to the child that biting hurts and is not nice. Then, discuss the child’s feelings and provide the child with alternate means to express his/her feelings.
E. If the child is engaging in attention-seeking behaviors, tell the child that biting is not appropriate behavior. Explain to the child that biting hurts and is not nice. Provide the child with alternate means to let you know when s/he would like attention from you. Then, provide the child with the attention s/he seeks.
4. Watch the child to see if there is recurrence of the biting behavior. Praise the child when s/he confronts a situation in which s/he would have bitten (based on past conduct) but did not bite. Redirect the child’s behavior if biting recurs. You will need to follow the child’s parents’ guidelines on redirection (ex., verbal redirection on first occurrence, a time out on second occurrence, and an immediate bedtime on third or successive occurrence).
5. When the parents return home, let them know of the child’s behaviors and how you responded.
Care4hire

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