Birthday Cake That Is Safe for Dairy Allergy Sufferers

Updated on November 15, 2009
S.F. asks from Milford, MA
20 answers

We are planning a very small, simple home birthday party with a homemade cake for our daughter's 6th birthday. We know one of her guests is allergic to dairy. I was planning to make the Perfectly Chocolate Cake on the back of the Hershey's box, which I've made a million times before, following the standard recipe. I am wondering if soy milk can be used as a straight substitution for milk in any homemade cake recipe. Has anyone tried this? Also, does anyone have ideas for homemade frosting that is non-dairy, or know of one that is available in the regular cake aisle of the supermarket?

Also, are standard chicken nuggets safe for dairy allergy sufferers?

Thanks everyone!

3 moms found this helpful

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S.M.

answers from Boston on

Yes you can substitute soy milk in place of cows milk.you must also watch for butter if the recipe calls for it and choose a dairy free alternative like fleishmans margarine, smart balance or earths balance. Whole foods carries cherrybrook farm ready made frosting!

P.H.

answers from Boston on

In Shaws markets or Whole Foods there is a cake mix called Cake for Everyone and it covers all of allergies. Do ask the parent if the child is also allergic to soy too as that can happen. Just do double chekc their allergies an Thank You for doing this as kids with allergies do get left out of party food most times! Always have cut up fruit available for these tpye of things so kids who cannot eat what or daily have fruit to eat

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C.F.

answers from Pittsfield on

Hi there,
Best choc. cake I've ever had, and so easy.
POOR MAN'S CHOCOLATE CAKE
3 C. flour
1 1/2 C. sugar
6 Tbsp. cocoa powder
2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
2 tsp. vanilla
2 Tbsp. vinegar
2 C. water
2/3 C. vegetable oil

Put all dry ingredients into a bowl and stir. Make a "well" in the center and add all wet ingredients into the well. Mix thoroughly and pour in ungreased pan. (9x13) Bake at 350 for 30-35 min.
Cupcakes take about 15-20 min.
If you plan on taking layers out of pan, grease and flour pan first, but otherwise, no need. Not sure on time for layer cakes, but it's done when you can touch lightly in center and it springs back up.

There are some canned frostings that I think don't have dairy, but I can't remember which. Should say on ingredients. Though some have whey, which is dairy.

Home made non-dairy frosting:
1 C. shortening
2 Tbsp. water
1 tsp. vanilla
About 4 1/2 C. powdered sugar.

Cream shortening, water and vanilla. Add sugar gradually, adding more water if necessary to get desired consistency.

For chocolate frosting, which isn't quite as sweet, just substitute 1/2 C. cocoa powder for 1/2 C. of the sugar, beating the cocoa in before adding sugar.

This cake is also really good with just powdered sugar sprinkled on top, or when you don't have to worry about dairy, with chocolate pudding instead of frosting. Good luck. Enjoy.

3 moms found this helpful
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K.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi - that is very thoughtful of you to think of your daughter's friend at her party! My daughter has milk allergies, as well. She is only 18 months old, and was just diagnosed within the past 6 months, so we haven't really had to deal with this yet, but... I would say that you still have to be careful about cake mixes, which may contain dairy in the mix itself (ingredients to look for are milk, whey, casein, butter). If the mix doesn't have any of these ingredients, you could probably check with the friend's mom to see if she would be ok with you serving that cake.

There is a great website - foodallergy.org - that has lots of info about allergies, including some recipes for cake and frosting here: http://www.foodallergy.org/morerecipes.html

There is also a kid-centered version of the Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network's website - faankids.org - which would be wonderful for your daughter to look at to get ideas of how to support her friend.

Oh and yes, I think most standard chicken nuggets are safe.

Thanks for thinking of your daughter's friend, and I hope your daughter has a wonderful birthday!

1 mom found this helpful
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W.D.

answers from Boston on

your best bet is to ask the parent.. I am lactose intollerant and can not handle soy either. You can try www.godairyfree.com for recipes too.. the Mom may even bring her own cupcake for her child so no one else is affected by the one child's allergy. Chicken nuggets are probably not dairy free too.. again, ask the parent what the child can handle... good luck

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S.I.

answers from Boston on

Cherry Brook Farm dairy-free cake mix. Definitely the easy way to go, though love the poor mans cake posted below. They make frosting too. And if ever you get a wheat dairy soy allergy kid that shows up they make that -free too!
Thanks for thinking of other kids, much appreciated from a mom of a kid with a zillion allergies.

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D.A.

answers from Boston on

Hi,
Have you carefully checked the cake box that you have? My son is allergic to milk and i can't say that i have checked every box in the super market but i have not found one that did not have milk (whey Casein) in the mix already. I buy his cake mix at whole foods cherry brook farms cake mix dairy free and nut free. you might be able to find it at stop and shop in the organic isle not with baking stuff. Pillsbury fun fetti frosting does not have milk in it or you can also get a dairy free one at wholefoods. Soy milk is ok to use or rice milk.

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N.S.

answers from Hartford on

I would check wiht the parents...my daughter was allergic to dairy as a child but could eat it if it was baked into something like a cake...

I have found that soy mild can be substituted just as regular milk in almost anything...

you'll find most frostings are dairy free... (they are all sugar)

Please if you are doing cake and ICE CREAM pick up a Sherbert or Soy based ice cream for the 6 year old who cannot have dairy...that was the worst when my daughter was allergic not having ice cream so we brought a little bitof sherbert or soy ice cream whenever we went to a party.
Also Big Y has dairy free cakes as well! Frosting and all..

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M.M.

answers from Boston on

You are really thoughtful to be inclusive. I would recommend talking with the mom of the girl about your plans. It takes a while to learn how to cover all the bases of what to look for/avoid with a food allergy. Sometimes people have rules about not eating homemade baked goods except from home because of cross contamination issues and/or the need for clear easy rules for the allergic child to follow. The mother will be the best person to let you know how to include her child safely and she will be very appreciative to have the open dialogue to lessen her concerns about the party.
Have a great party.

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M.H.

answers from Hartford on

Hi S.,
Do you mean Hersheys MILK chocolate cake. Prob. no good. My son has a dairy alergy- We always make a seperate cake for him- Whole foods has a lot of cake batter with no dairy or we just do Angel food cake. Some chicken nuggets have dairy. I would talk to the mom- Find out how serious it is. My son is started to out grow so he can't drink a glass a milk but can sometimes get away with a muffin that has powdered milk in it. Again Ask the mom is your best bet. Good luck.

M.L.

answers from Hartford on

That is tough, I am pretty sure you can substitute. Maybe talk to the mom of the child, she would be very familar with what her child can eat. Is there soy cream cheese, maybe cream cheese frosting??

Allegies are tough, that is why I use all natural products-they are awesome!

M. - SAHM and WAHM and love it!

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B.M.

answers from Boston on

hi S.,

I have lots of experience in dealing with food allergies. My son has multiple food allergies. I use Cherrybrook Kitchen cake, cookie, frosting and brownie mixes. They are delicious. I use ricemilk in the recipes, but most call for water and oil. If you are frosting your cake for a dairy allergy kid you can't use butter. I use smartbalance light instead of butter in the cherrybrook frosting mix...you can also find it pre-made. Look in the natural section of your grocery store or in whole foods.
Chicken nuggets are usually safe...READ ALL INGREDIENTS for dairy products because you will be surprised where milk is used. Good luck and be thorough in reading labels.

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M.M.

answers from Boston on

Hi S.!
I agree w/ Amy....My 8 year old also has a milk protein allergy, which is not to be confused with lactose issues (a very different animal). Don't be afraid to check with the mom on anything; trust me, she'll appreciate it. And my son too eats the Tyson nuggets safely. But you'd be surprised what has milk, whey, and that pesky "casein" and "sodium caseinate" and what doesn't (Oreo cookies are actually OK...whereas some chic nuggets are not-the coating in alot have milk)...BTW: my little man now can some small pieces of cake made with dairy and he tolerates it well. Good luck

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A.B.

answers from Boston on

Hello S.,
My son is almost 11 and has had a milk protein allergy since infancy. As you can imagine, events like this are hard, as so many foods contain milk in some form! Your guest's mother will probably be quite happy you went the extra mile to accommodate her daughter. That being said, I'm seeing some misinformation on here about milk allergy. If the child has a true cow's milk protein allergy (whey or casein), this is not the same as lactose intolerance and there is a lot of crossover between cow's and goat's milk - NOT a safe substitution. Soy milk is fine, especially vanilla or chocolate flavored for extra sweetness. I believe it's Duncan Hines that makes a few kinds of cake mix without milk. Manufacturers need to clearly label the top 8 allergens now, as well. You can look for the Kosher symbol (small u with a circle around it - bottom front of package - NOT with a D (dairy) next to it). For frosting, you can use plain Crisco or Fleishman's margarine with the green label (again - u circle symbol). You will also need to ask the child's mother if "facility" or trace amounts of milk are okay. Everyone seems to be putting this on labels now, I believe for liability issues. A lot of chicken nuggets have milk in the batter. We use regular Tyson nuggets. To be safe, I'd save all of the food packaging and have the mother check it at the start of the party.
Hope this helps - it can be confusing, but I'm sure the family will appreciate your efforts!
Just editing my response again after reading others' responses. DO NOT give Sherbet to a child with a milk allergy - it does contain milk! Most Sorbet's are okay, as they are only fruit, sugar, and water, but again, labels need to be read. I don't mean to be an alarmist, but I'm amazed at the bad information out there, especially given by parents of children with allergies. Will you send a follow-up and let us know how you made out? TY

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K.C.

answers from Boston on

Yes, you can definitely substitute soy milk---it works very well. I have two kids with dairy allergies and we do it all the time. The key to chicken nuggets is just to check the ingredients--the Tysons ones we have are dairy free. Look for milk, whey, milk powder, butter--any of these things will have dairy. There are several mixes from the grocery store that are dairy free---one cake mix (Pillsbury? I just cannot remember but one of the main ones is). ONe of the frostings in a can is also dairy free--same brand as the cake mix. We make these cakes a lot.

Almost all margarine also has traces of dairy --so if you need to add margarine or butter you need the vegan variety.

Its a pain I know---but as a parent of kids with allergies--it means so much to at least try to include the kids with milk allergies since they are often having something different to eat that their parents bring. We are always grateful---you could also just check with the parents--email them the ingredients to check etc.

Good luck and thanks for thinking of allergic kids!

kca

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R.M.

answers from Boston on

S., the answer to your question, "if soy milk can be used as a straight substitution for milk in any homemade cake recipe?" Yes, you CAN substitute soy milk for dairy milk in any homemade cake recipe. You are only substituting one liquid for another.
The frosting question is a lot tougher but if you're making a chocolate cake, why not dust some powdered sugar through a fancy doily? It's still a decoration and best of all it's quick and easy.

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R.B.

answers from Boston on

Sounds silly, but check with the other mom and see if she can have goats milk. Goats milk doesn't have the same milk proteins (lactose) that cows milk does. I have multiple friends who had children with lactose intolerances when nursing or at a year and the moms and kids could have goats milk. You can get it powdered, canned, or fresh from local farms. Fresh tastes just like cows and you'd never know the difference.

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K.Q.

answers from Boston on

That is very considerate of you. My niece is allergic to milk and my sister travels to every party with a pre-frostd cupcake! Hannaford-brand cake mixes are generally milk-free; I make these all the time. There are a few canned frostings that are dairy-free as well; just make sure to read the ingredients listings and allergy info. Or you can make crisco/shortening frosting and those generally have no milk (or substitute soy milk). In the past, when I've made cakes from scratch that are not dairy-free (for example, frosted in homemade buttercream frosting), I've made dairy-free cupcakes that coordinate with the bigger cake. For my son's castle party, the main cake was a dragon. I made dairy free cupcakes to surround it topped with small knights and princesses.

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K.B.

answers from Boston on

Hi there,

My 2 yr old daughter has milk/egg/nut allergies, so I am learning!

Pillsbury makes a can vanilla frosting that is dairy free. And Duncan Hines makes a yellow cake mix that is dairy free--not sure about chocolate.
Cherry Brook Kitchen already mentioned is also a super and safe option.

You are very considerate to do this. I always go to parties with my own cake and food, but it is really nice that you are being so thoughtful.

Happy Birthday to your daughter!

Good luck and enjoy!!

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K.C.

answers from Boston on

Dairy-free icing recipe here: http://www.wilton.com/recipe/Snow-White-Buttercream-Icing

Or just go simpler with 1c vegetable shortening, 1lb confectioner's sugar, 1tbs meringue powder, 1tsp vanilla or other flavoring, and enough water to make it the consistancy you want, about 4tbs. That makes about 3 cups of icing.

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