Birthday - Westbrook, ME

Updated on September 21, 2007
L.C. asks from Westbrook, ME
18 answers

Question:
What do you do when you have a large family get together for birthdays that aren’t on the child’s real b.day? My problem is my son is turning 5 and his birthday is Feb 11th and we are having a family party on the 25th. Do I give him his gifts on his real day or wait. What do you all do?

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for telling me what you do on your childrens b.days . . . this really hasn't been an issue and now I know it isn't really a problem and I will be giving him his gifts on his birthday and letting him pick what we have for dinner and what we watch together as a family on TV. Thanks so much.

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C.H.

answers from Boston on

wait for the party! I buy a cheese cake or we have a special dinner out on my girls real b-day to make it special, but save all the "good stuff" for the big party!

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M.W.

answers from Boston on

Hi L., I usually have my children's parties after their birthday. They open most gifts from us on their birthday after having dinner or going out to dinner. They are getting gifts from other people at the party anyhow. ~M.~ (mom of 3 ; ages 12, 9, and 5 months)

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M.

answers from Springfield on

For our girls, we usually give them their presents from us on their actual birthdays, and then they get the presens from the birthday party guests the day of the party. My oldest is 9, and she loves that she gets two days of presents instead of just one!

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M.D.

answers from Providence on

We have the same issue. Since there are so many family members at the big party, we give our kids their b-day presents from us on the actual birthday and not at the party. They get plenty of other gifts at the party - splitting them up like that makes the kids appreciate them more.

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C.

answers from Providence on

I give gifts on both. The majority on my daughter's birthday and the best one at the party. Have fun.
C.

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C.G.

answers from Boston on

We have a large shared gathering because our two kids have birthdays close together and they are also both close to father's day. We always celebrate on Father's day, which means that sometimes one of the birthdays falls before the celebration.

When this happens we give our child the gifts that are from us on his birthday, but he waits for the celebration to get the rest of the presents. The child who has the later birthday just gets hers early. But i never ask extended family to send their gifts early for the earlier birthday, nor do I make the child with the later birthday wait, because half the joy they get from giving the gifts is watching the kids open them!!!

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B.S.

answers from Boston on

I have 2 girls (8 and 4). On their real birthdays, we have their favorite dinner and a small cake. We give them presents from us. Then when their birthday party comes, it is all about their friends or other family members. I like having their real birthdays just for us, after all we were the only ones present when they came into the world. Hope this helps.

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C.E.

answers from Boston on

L., Since it so hard to do a party on their actual b-day (which usually doesnt fall on a weekend day). I have a party for adults (my family and inlaws) on the Sunday closest to her b-day and then have their party for kids on a weekend.
ex. This past Sunday we had the family party (pizza and cake) at my Moms house and her real party is this Sunday.Her Birthday was Mon Jan 29th.

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

I have the same problem. My son's birthday and his half-brother's are two weeks apart so we usually split the difference. When he was younger, what I did wass at the big party, done the gifts and cake, and then on the actual day, we do a small cake with just the people in the house to acknowledge the day. That seemed to work pretty well. Maybe hold back one gift, but I didn't always do that.

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K.C.

answers from Providence on

we usually make a homemade cake and homemade arts and craft gifts! nothing that takes too much time just a little after dinner surprise. the kids love it and their siblings love to show their creations made especially for their brother or sister. If you have babies hand and footprints made into a design is fun. Then for the big party you can give the store bought gifts and stuff.

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H.M.

answers from Lewiston on

L.,
I would do both. He's old enough to know when his real bday is, so a small celebration of his birth on that day with just you and dad and brother would be appropriate with your gifts then. Explain that he won't get gifts from you again, though, at his other party. Large family gatherings can be overstimulating and overwhelming for a child, so spreading out the gifts may take a little of the pressure off.

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T.M.

answers from Boston on

Hi L.~
With me I have always had a party (except one year) for my boys and I always have them on the weekend wether it's their actual b-day or not. But on their actual b-day I will decorate the kitchen, we have a cake and will do presents from momma & daddy. I don't worry about the boys having presents from us to open at the party because the rest of the family (grandparents etc) usually bring some and they open those. It works out and the kids love it, like getting 2 birthdays. So on their actual b-day and the day of the party they have presents to open. If you have presents for your son from you on his actual b-day then I wouldn't worry about having some from you at his party. It's really what works best for each family. Good luck and have fun at the party!

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A.O.

answers from Springfield on

Hi, I usually buy 2 maybe 3 gifts for my children's birthday's, depending on he cost of what htey want and we have just a family party on the actual day and I give them the bigger present and when we have the big party on the weekend with their friends, I give them something small just so they have something form me to open that day.

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A.D.

answers from Portland on

We have had the same issue and what we do is ..Have a small hand made cake and gifts just from mom and dad and dinner of his choice the day of his real b-day( we try to keep this day just a mommy and daddy day) then on his party day we let him have the gifts from others. hope that helps a little bit.....take care

A.

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S.F.

answers from Boston on

I usually end up buying more than one thing for my son for holidays/bday etc...so I would give him some on his bday and the rest on the party day...or if you are only giving one gift I would do it on his real bday...he should feel special that day and will have plenty of gifts to open at the party too.

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H.W.

answers from Providence on

Hi L..
I have a small party (w/presents) for my daughter, consisting of only my household. I hope that helps.

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M.

answers from Providence on

Hi L.,

My husband and I just celebrated my daughter's first birhtday, and we celebrated, just the three of us on her real birthday, excluding cake (because this year she didn't know any better), and gave her her gifts on her actual birthday.

I think that makes it more likely that they will remember the special time with Mom and Dad, and they are already getting so much at the birthday party.

Have Fun!
M.

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T.S.

answers from Boston on

I think that you should give him one thing on his real bday and give him everything eles on the party day

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