Your son is young and is discovering his own independence.
Decide what rules are important, what the consequences will be, and what your expectations are. Clearly explain all of the above in a manner your child will understand. Consequences do not necessarily need to be punishments -- sometimes cause and effect is consequence enough.
For example, if the rule is your child can not go outside without a coat, and he refuses -- the consequence will be cold. Bring the coat with you, but only let him have it you feel the weather is dangerous to his health/safety (a long sleeve tshirt in 50 degree weather may leave him a little chilly, but certainly will not cause frostbite!). The consequence of refusing to wear his coat will be how cold he felt. He is learning now and will continue to learn about cause and effect.
Let your punishment fit the crime. Taking away Christmas is extreme and will not make the situation any better. If he throws a fit, IGNORE HIM COMPLETELY. I used to tell my son calmly, "I don't talk to children who are screaming." and then would ignore him until he calmed down.
Give him choices. Let him have some control in his life -- maybe let him pick out his outfit (if you dont like the idea of mis-matched clothes, put clothing away as outfits and let your child pick an outfit). Let him choose his bedtime story, or what cereal he eats for breakfast. Give him choices you can live with -- obviously don't offer "do you want the carrot sticks or the candy bar for snack". Offer choices you are comfortable with "Would you like juice or milk?", "Wuold you like carrot sticks or apple slices?", etc.
It sounds as if your son is crying for attention -- and often with children, they feel that any attention is better than no attention. Turn off the TV altogether and play with him -- puzzles, games, crafts, blocks, outside play in your yard or park. Engage his mind and body -- plenty of fresh air will help the bedtime battle! Can he count? Does he know his ABC's? Colors, shapes? Does he have crayons, markers, paper, glue at home? Playdoh? Explore his world with him -- you may see much of his so-called bad behavior disappear. My son went through the same thing. He is far from perfect now, at 5, but with clear expectations, rules he understands, and consequences he can expect (if he chases the cats, he sits in time out, the punishment is consistent), his behavior is so much better. He rarely acts up anymore.