Bedwetting - Seeking Advice on Treatment Systems/alarms

Updated on October 06, 2009
A.M. asks from Webster, NY
15 answers

My 6 1/2 yr old daughter potty-trained at 2 with no trouble but has never been dry at night. We limit drinking (but not completely restrict on advice from Dr) before bed, use the toilet before going to bed and get her up around 11:30-12:00 to take her to the bathroom. She is also on a dairy-free diet due to a diary intolerence and milk seems to make things worse. Rewards for dryness don't work and just make her feel sad because she sleeps too heavily to be successful. We don't criticize. We let her know she isn't doing anything wrong. We give her lots of love and support. Basically, we are following all the typical bedwetting advice.

Despite getting her up to go, she may be wet as often as twice a night. She's getting to the age where she's beginning to feel embarrassed, is thinking about sleepovers and refuses pullups. Her previous pediatrician wouldn't even discuss the issue - just said wait it out. We have an appointment coming up with her new ped soon. It's not that I'm overly upset about the bedwetting itself, it's just that she is a sensitive kid who worries alot and really doesn't need the extra anxiety this is causing her.

I've been doing some research on treatment systems, alarms etc. in advance of our appointment. If medical reasons are ruled out we may try one to see if it helps. I'd love any advice (beyond the typical don't drink, get up at night things we are already doing) from others who have been in our shoes. I'd especially like to hear about the pros & cons of any treatment systems you may have tried before I jump in to trying anything. I'm looking for something that vibrates and allows control over the type of alarm. My daughter is VERY sensitive to loud sounds, especially beeps and buzzes. I'm also open to nutritional/dietary changes/supplement suggestions. She eats a good healthy diet - no caffeine, limited sugar, lots of veggies and fiber, no dairy. I know that this will eventally pass. Just don't want my sweet little girl to worry about this any longer than she has to. Thanks in advance for your advice!

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

W.P.

answers from New York on

I was just at my son's pediatrician and briefly discussed the topic with her. He is just 4 and wears a pull up at night which is almost always wet in the morning. While I am not yet at the point of trying any interventions, she told me that many children have a hard time staying dry at night up until 11 years old. She told me that there is a medication that children can take on an as needed basis to stay dry at night, i..e when going on sleepovers to avoid embarassment.

Good luck

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.T.

answers from Buffalo on

Part of the problem could be it's hereditary. Did you or your husband or your siblings have issues? My husband and all three of his siblings had issues with bedwetting, up until ages 10 through 12. I, on the other hand, never wet the bed after I was two or three. My sons both had issues with the bedwetting. They were also heavy sleepers. Eventually the doctor gave them some medicine which helped to strenghten their bladders. They were on it for a few months and that really helped the issue. My sis-in-law said she remembered being put on medicine that did the same for her, too.

Never tried the alarm systems or anything else like that because my boys are teens now. We'll see what happens with the baby, who'll be two in two months.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Albany on

One overlooked reason for bed-wetting that we figured out quite by accident is that the kidneys are a storage spot for mercury. My daughter wet the bed almost every night of her life for over 13 years. Like yours she was totally potty trained at 2 and had no issues at all during the day.

With her (and I assume many other bed-wetters) there were two issues going on: the mercury causes candida overgrowth in the gut. When a child has a slow/faulty digestive system, the last meal of the day may sit in the belly all night fermenting and this produces alcohol which of course make a person severely sleepy and unable to wake up. My daughter could sleep through 3 alarms going off at the same time! Me being an insomniac would bear the real burden since I could never get back to sleep again. Basically I was in a state of sleep deprivation for 13 years.

This can be a vicious cycle if she can't sleep without food in her belly. Mine couldn't so I had to let her eat. Urinating at night has very little to do with how much liquid a person has at night. I have a very small bladder and can drink a couple glasses of water before bed and I don't get up. This was only possible after detoxifying the mercury out of my body though and re-balancing gut bacteria.

To make a long story short, my daughter has never wet the bed again after the detox. NEVER. She still eats before bed too.

Anyone who has a mother or grandmother who has had vaccinations or amalgam fillings will pass mercury on to their baby via pregnancy. If the baby is also vaccinated then toxic overload can occur. For boys this often means autism. Girls often have other symptoms like bed-wetting.

You're welcome to email me for all the details--I have pages and pages of information--too much to write here.

____@____.com

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.E.

answers from New York on

You sound like such a nice mom-I also have a 7 year old daughter and I feel bad about what you are going through. My daughter is also very sensitive about things,I find if she is worried about something-just by putting her mind at ease about a situation helps her to feel better. My thought with your little girl is,maybe she is so worried about it she is making herself do it without realizing while she sleeps. Have you said something like- sweetie, this is no big deal,in time your body will just grow out of it , so dont worry yourself about it anymore. Maybe you have tried this,or maybe it is medical-so it is good to rule that out. My daughter threw up everywhere we went from the time she was born until about 5-I took her to every specialist out ther and they found nothing-it was aawful-my husband and I would always have crackers ready because the smell of food would just trigger it- thank god she just grew out of it-I never thought she would. I was so worried about her so I understand and your little girl will grow out of this as well. I dont know if ive helped-but I wish you and your child the best of luck and my motto is-This too shall pass.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from New York on

A.:

As a mom to a TEENAGE bedwetter (my daughter is 17) my suggestions are as follows:

Yes, some do grow out of this stage (though not in my case) - and others do not.

Here's a question...Will she even refuse to use pullups while at home? I can understand the refusal during a sleepover - but at home she should feel confident enough..no?

I don't believe in the nitetime alarms if your daughter is such a heavy sleeper - in my experience, the alarms only woke everyone ELSE up in the house and not the bedwetter, and they corroded after a month or so.(even after thorough cleanings)(these are the alarms that clip inside the underwear so that when there is a presence of urine - an ear piercing alarm goes off to warn the bedwetter to get up and go to the bathroom)

I also don't believe in waking the child after they've been sleeping to go to the bathroom - if they are in such a deep sleep and you are 'dragging' them to the bathroom and making them go, chances are they won't remember going the next day. (in my experience this has happened) not to mention the lack of sleep they get from doing so.

I've used the following 'techniques'/'rules' :

no food/drink after dinner - eating promotes drinking - drinking promotes bedwetting. (which I'm sure you are already doing)

Have your daughter sit on the toilet for 3-5 minutes every 2 hours - even if she says he doesn't have to go. Give her a puzzle or a game or a magazine/book..etc...to occupy the time - the time spent on the toilet allows for her 'system' relax enough to go. Buy her a watch with an alarm and teach her how to set it to go off every 2 hours to remind her to go to the bathroom. You can check with your new pediatrician to see if this is feasible for school hours and perhaps get a note to give to the school allowing for her to go to the bathroom every 2 hours so she is in the 'mode' on a daily basis.

The last resort is the one I had no choice in making and that was to put my daughter on medication. DDAVP comes in a nasal spray and also a pill form. Ditropan is another medication in helping with bladder problems. She is on both and I'm happy to say hasn't had an accident in a long time! We've tried to take her off the meds only for her to have an accident and then go back on them. I've gone through all kinds of testing with her since she was about your daughter's age - only to find out that her bladder is just immature and there's no telling when she may stop.

I hope this helps....good luck to your daughter!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.K.

answers from New York on

My now 11 yo daughter wet the bed regularly until she was about 7. For years I would walk her to the potty right before I went to bed. Then someone pointed out that if she was still basically asleep (which she was, she had no memory of our trips in the morning) I was essentially teaching her to urinate in her sleep. Not that I was the cause, her deep sleep was the issue, but the 11 p.m. trip wasn't helping anything but the laundry. I stopped walking her to the bathroom and she outgrew it about a year later.

It is tough, hang in there!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.C.

answers from New York on

I too have a six year old daughter who wets the bed at night! Like your daughter, she is a very hard sleeper. Her ped. says, like yours, that she will probably outgrow it, but is sending her to see a eurologist. There are some medical issues that can cause this. We are have an appointment, but have not yet seen the doctor. Out ped. says that the key is probably the fact that she sleeps sooooo hard! Sound a lot like your daughter. Sorry I don't have any advice other than the eurologist, but know you and your daughter are not alone. Oh, our ped. did say that there is a med. she can take that will keep her from wetting the bed. It's not a "cure". She will continue wetting the bed without the pill. He said it is an option for the dreaded sleepover! We'll talk to the eurologist about this. Good luch!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.Q.

answers from New York on

First thing I would do is check her diet to make sure she is 100% dairy free including hidden ingredients, cross contamination, body care products, cleaning products etc. If you are sure this is not the source of her bedwetting, consider looking for another dietary or environmental source of her bedwetting. Food-wise some of the more common bed wetting items are dairy (which is already out of her diet), gluten/wheat, soy, orange, but it could be anything, so watch for better/worse days. Environmentally, chemicals are a huge source of bedwetting problems, look for fragrances, pesticides etc in and around your home and try limiting them as much as possible.

Meanwhile, consider setting a schedule, where you assist your child to the toilet before she wets the bed. Sit up watching her during the night for a night or two to find out the approximate time she tends to wet. Then set up an alarm just before that time of night and take her to the toilet (only wake her up enough for her to go). After a bit it she may be able to do it on her own.

Discuss both programs with her and have her help in the decision making on how & what she is willing to do and how much you and she will need to work toward figuring out why she is bedwetting and what your (collective) solution will be.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.D.

answers from New York on

Dont give her anything to drink after dinner. She will NOT dehydrate. If you think she will, try it yourself. Don't drink anything after dinner and you will be fine. Also when she has the urge to pee during the day tell her to try to hold it for 5 minutes or as long as she can. This will increase her muscle tone and the size of her bladder. Being a sound sleeper is part of the problem, but not needing to pee is the other part. Lots of kids dont get up in the night to pee and remain dry.
Its good that you dont criticize her, its not her fault. They sell OVERNIGHTS for kids her age that look like underwear and perhaps she will think of them a big girl items instead of baby pull ups.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.N.

answers from New York on

Hi A.
I too have a bed-wetter. My son was potty trained at 4 and then he went through something tramatic which triggered him into bed wetting. We have tried the alarms, they didn't work because he is also a heavy sleeper and I would be the one jumping up to wake him or even shut off the alarm because he was just too tired to get up. We have taken my son to a urologist and he said that my son's bladder just needs time to catch up with his size. I am sure you also know that Bed-wetting is hereditary. My son still wears his pull-up and now lets some of his close friends know that he has this issue and if your daughters friends are good friends they will understand it is not her fault and she will get through this. Try going on the good nites web-site they have a place for kids to go and that may help her too. Good Luck!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.

answers from New York on

I am an ex-bedwetter. I didn't really outgrow it until I was 12. And frankly, all the advice (no liquids, no dairy, no this not that) doesn't work. Your body, as long as it's hydrated (which comes from drinking all day long) still continues to produce urine. It's a waste product and there is not stopping that, no matter how much you limit liquids. The problem is pretty much the same with all bed wetters. They sleep very soundly. I actually remember as a kid knowing I needed to go. I'd see myself get up out of bed, walk down the hall and sit on the potty. The problem, I was dreaming it. The only thing that worked was the alarm. It's conditioning (like Pavlov's dog). And if she's a very sound sleeper, vibrations won't be enough to wake her. There were times the buzzing alarm wasn't enough to wake me. A reward system won't work. It's not something she has conscience control of. Good luck. This is a long hard road. I wish I had better advice for you. I'd try the alarm, it works.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.M.

answers from New York on

Hi
First, good luck and good patience. I remember wondering it if would ever stop, but it did eventually (phew!).

I have heard of successes with the alarms, but did not use them. For our heavy-sleeping son, it was a matter of time.

My son was day-time potty trained at 3. Night-time training happened when he was about 6. He used pull-ups initially, then at about 4 1/2 or 5, he tried no pull-ups.

During the no pull-up time, he would wet the bed between 12 - 2am, but still sleep until 6-7am. (Not sure he slept soundly, but he remained in bed and was asleep). We did a lot of laundry. Eventually, he started to wake himself in the late evening to urinate and then could hold it the rest of the evening.

Our younger child is on the same track with day/night time training. Our doctor supposes it is just their bladders and bodies getting used to it all.

Good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.C.

answers from New York on

I was also a bedwetter until about 11. I was a heavy sleeper. My poor mom changing those sheets every day. She was so good about it all. My parents, at the rec of their pediatrician, bought an alarm box. It so frightened me when it went off, I would shake for ages afterwards. Needless to say, we got rid of it. My dad ended up offering me money to see if that would work. I practically stayed up all night, afraid to pee, wanting that money! I don't know if my bladder had just finally matured and the timing was right, but that was the start of the end of bed wetting. Good luck to you and your family.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.S.

answers from New York on

Hi A.,

I feel your pain my son who is now a grown man had nighttime accidents until over 10 years old. He actually was to the point that he would bring his own wet sheets and clothing to the washer on his own. It was horrible for him because he was embarrassed and would not go to a sleepover because of it. Back then they did not have pull-ups so I would have him sleep on a waterproof crib mat to cut down on wash. As far as the accidents we did everything. We would wake him, cut down on liquids, we even used a prescribed nasal spray for this situation to no avail. Some days it worked and others it didn't. Sometimes he would have two accidents in one night. He was such a sound sleeper that we would walk him to the bathroom sleeping and put him back in bed without him even waking up. I think that is the issue due to sleeping so soundly. I think no matter what we do they just have to grow out of it. I am not sure if it is something to do with the bladder not being mature or their brain not sending the signals to wake them use the bathroom. I would tell her that putting on a pull-up and put her underwear over them noone will see them and she can feel confident to sleep out. Otherwise she is going to miss out on fun that she could be having. I know how hard it is my heart broke for my son. Hang in there one day it will just go away as quickly as it came on. Good luck!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.C.

answers from Albany on

Hi A.,
I wanted to chime in on the advice for your daughter. First of all, you sound like SUCH an in-tune, sensitive, caring mom, and I'm telling you, that, above all, is going to help her weather this problem. :)

I'm speaking from experience - as a child, i was a chronic bedwetter. I actually wet until i was a teenager (don't tell your daughter that, though, for fear of discouraging her)... and your post hit home for me. Sleepovers were a big issue for me - i wanted to be involved so much but would often find excuses not to stay the night. My mom would tell my friend's mothers (sometimes), in an effort to just minimize any "damage" but still allow me to go. Sometimes that worked, but i would be nervous the entire time.

Anyway, mine was medical but nothing specific.... i had a small bladder and many urinary tract infections. that was about the best they could do in terms of explaining it. i DID grow out of it - just took a while.(and i was an extreme, i think)

We had an alarm for a short time, and I have to say i don't recommend it - not only did it not help but i ended up, in my sleep, turning it off, b/c the jolt awake was so horrible. Also, we had a buzzing one and it was only recently that i could play a popular board game that used a buzzer - it used to drive me crazy before, just b/c it was such an unsettling (and familiar) noise.

A few thigns that DID work - I remember getting something called DDAVP nasal spray. You may want to ask your dr about it. I dont' think it is specifically FOR bedwetting but it hadd been shown to work. This is years ago, so i don't know if they still use it. But i remember we had the most success with that.

Another thing i remember doing/checking - is your daughter's bowel cycles. The theory there was that if your daughter is constipated, it will put pressure on her bladder, not allowing it to expand as it needs to at night. I remember keeping a calendar of days i "went" and days i wet and alot of times you'd see some patterns. It's worth a shot.

It's definitely hard - i was sensitive, too, and it was an emotional thing b/c you can't control it and you do feel differently than everyone else. But the best thing you can do is what you're doing - being sensitive to her issue and being supportive and loving. There is nothing worse than adding shame to the embarassment she probably already feels. She's lucky to have a mom who is putting her emotional needs first. :)

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches