Bed Time Potty Training

Updated on January 19, 2007
A.W. asks from Fayetteville, PA
22 answers

My daughter will be 5 this coming March. She has been potty trained since just before she turned 2, except for at bedtime. She still wears a pull-up to bed. Usually she will wake up after peeing and change the pull-up but I want her to realize it before hand. I cut off drinks about 1-1/2 -2 hrs before bed, make her pee right before bed but nothing. Very rarely she wakes up dry. I think part of it is she is a really deep sleeper and doesn't wake up. Shy of making her sleep in underwear and changing sheets every night, what else is there???

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for your suggestions. One thing I forgot to mention - my daughter sleeps in a junior loft bed, so having her change wet sheets isn't possible yet. And it's a very big pain in the neck for me. I have tried waking her up before I go to bed to go potty, but she just fusses and cries and won't go - she is a very very deep sleeper. I think I'm going to try ending pull-ups and using the waterproof covers suggested several times. I'll keep you all posted. Thanks again!

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T.S.

answers from Dover on

Try reading the book Dry All Night. I forget the author's name, but i've used the book before with kids (I'm a counselor) and it's been successful! Traci

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L.O.

answers from Reading on

I also have the same issue with my 4 yr old. She has been potty trined since she was 2 except at night. She also will wake up to change her wet pull up but still does not have dry nights. Her ped. (doctor) told me when she is ready we will know not to stress it.

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C.J.

answers from Harrisburg on

This is copy of great advice from one mom to another mom on "My 4 yr old isnt potty trained yet"....check it out....I know you have a daughter and this refers to a boy, but it might still work.

Throw away the pull ups. He knows you will resort back to them. Make him clean himself up and give a hug and congrats when he goes. He's 4 years old, he'll figure it out in a hurry!! Stick to your guns...DO NOT GO BACK TO PULL UPS!!!! If you are afraid of messes at night, you can get waterproof mattress covers at walmart($6) get a few of them and put one on the matress, put sheets on, put another cover on and sheets, cover then sheets. That way in the night you can supervise him taking off the dirties, getting clean clothes and crawling into a clean bed. No work on your part, just give the directions. But show no emotions and make him do the cleaning up. I guarantee in a few days he will be potty trained.

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S.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

i hope you get an answer too. my daughter is 4 and will be 5 in late september. since i have another daughter who is 2 and in a size 5 diaper, i use those for her as well. she wakes up every day wet. i feel so bad putting diapers on her every night, but i don't want her to have wet sheets either. she is also a deep sleeper. i just figured i'd have to wait til she grows out of it. but if anyone else out there can help us, then great!

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L.R.

answers from Reading on

What if you woke her up to take her to pee before you go to bed. Also maybe if you move her drinks back another half hour to 2 hours before bedtime.

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A.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I have the exact same problem with my 4 year old daughter- I almost just want to put her in regular underwear at night because I think she would be fine but she sleeps with her older sister in bed and I don't want the bed to get wet. If you try something and it works could you please let me know? I just wanted you to know though that your not alone and other people have the same issues to. Hopefully they will just grow out of it :)

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B.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

My niece was almost seven years old before she was accident free at night time. My sister checked with the ped who didn't feel that it was a medical issue. My sister limited night time drinks and even put her daughter on the toilet at 11:00 but it made no difference. She decided to let it go and, in time, my niece did have dry nights. Good luck.

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L.S.

answers from Washington DC on

I just went through this about 4 months ago. I have 5 children so I put it off because they always were wet and I would tell them to try to keep it dry, limit drinks, offer prizes, still wet!!!!!!!!! Enough was enough so within 2 weeks I took both of my 3 and 4 yr olds pull-ups away. My 3-yr-old daughter wet her bed once ( I covered the mattresses with plastic covers) it made her mad and she never did it again. Now my 4-yr-old son had many accidents. About once every 3 days he would wet his bed. I would change him, throw a clean blanket down and put him back to bed. Eventually he started getting up and going to the bathroom after he started to pee a little and got his pants a little wet. So the point we are at now is no full blown peeing the bed but about once a week he may pee a bit in his underwear which wakes him up and he goes to the bathroom. I found with them that if there was a pull-up on they would use it, they are old enough to know what its for. I had to just take them away and deal with the messes or my son would've used a pull-up until he was 10 :) It's frustrating and lots of laundry but has paid off. Good luck, let us know what happens.

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R.G.

answers from York on

I have a 3 yr old who has been completely dry since before she was 2, but with the occasional wet night (like once every 3 weeks). When she hit a growth spurt around 2 1/2 she began regressing.

It has been my experience in talking with Dr's and doing my own research that a lot of bed wetters suffer from a lack of bladder strength. This is especially true with those children who are still wetting well after their 5th or 6th year. We have used the following product with phenomenal results. Might be worth a try. Good luck!

http://www.nativeremedies.com/be_dry_for_bedwetting.shtml

Rolinda
Wife, Mother, Friend

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I.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

hey A..w
i have no little ones at home my little ones are 19 yearsof age and 29 years of age and they are on their on.but i know what your saying my 19 years old did not like to be wet when she was young but once she start school she would wet the bed and to this day we dont know why.she stop when she turn 17 years of age when we let friends stay over.but your answer is this,put her in panty and if you have a dollar store near you or a dis-count store go their and they have these plastice bed cover that you put on the bed frist then the sheet,let her see what she did cut some of her fun out each time she do it.or do something like,baby girl if you dont wet your self for 5days ill get that dress or toy or what every and see how that work.but one more thing look out for them hideing the wet stuff thats another problem.they will try that.a little short story.i use to baby sit at my home for my oldest daughter friend she has 4 childen 2 gril and 2 boy well her 5 year old had to go to the bathroom and she went on her own did not need help came out like nothing was wrong,well i ws feeding the baby and the other childen was laying on the floor looking at tv,i notice that the little gril did not have any panty on,well girl i got to thinking why would her mother send her out like that,i go look in the bag for changeing cloths for her,so she can get wash and chang.i go to the bathroom and i keep smelling this bad smell,but could not find wear it was comeing from,so when i did fined it i was mad but i told her mother when she came to pick them up that she went to the bathroom had some promble going mest up her panty and dress ,took the panty off hide them with the boo boo in them behind my totile. i was done i thought i seen it all but that one took the place. just a little story on little childen on how they think. ha ha you can laugh and shear if you want.

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C.N.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi A.,

I know you must be frustrated but please know that this is not abnormal. In fact, Bed wetting is not even considered a problem until after puberty.

I have not read the other responses but here are my Top Five Night Time Potty Training Tips:

1. Limit drinks starting after dinner.
2. Wake her up just before you go to bed or anytime you wake up to use the bathroom during the night.
3. If you hear her stirring during the night, wake her up to use the bathroom. Many times a child will wake up to because they need to use the potty but do not actually wake up enough to get up and go.
4. You may want to try using underwear instead of pull ups. Some children think of pull ups as permission to pee.
5. Be patient. It won't last forever!

Always consult your child's doctor if you have concerns. Remember, no question is too silly to ask. If anything, you will be reassured that everything is ok.

Warmly,
C.

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N.M.

answers from Lancaster on

They have special sensors that beep to wake her when they start to get wet. Ask your pediatrician where to get them.

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A.R.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hi A.,
I went through a similar problem with my daughter who is now 8. I talked to her pediatrician and she told me that some children sleep so deeply that they cant wake up or feel the urge. Sometimes their central nervous system isnt mature enough for the bladder to tell the brain its full to wake up.
The hard thing is, WE cant control our kids bladder. Only they can. What worked for me was just allowing my daughter to feel confident even if she wore a pull up. No pressure. I allowed her to let me know when she felt like she could stop wearing the pull ups. The only thing I did was to wake her up like an hour and a half after falling asleep and making her pee. That helped. One word of caution...the doctor told me that kids that are "late bloomers" staying dry at night sometimes have sleeping disorders. My daughter has started sleep walking and talking in her sleep since she started staying dry at night! So, the doctor was right! I hope this helps...let me know how it goes.

A.

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L.S.

answers from Lancaster on

I have to agree with Heather, the OneStepAhead bed pads are great. I also got more than one, and when my son did not have the fear that wetting his bed was a big deal, HE told me -"no more diapers or pull-ups at night". He had turned 3 the month before and had been day potty trained all of 2 weeks. He's had maybe 5 accidents in 10 months, and those few times he has either been sick or on allergy meds which really cause you to go way out when you sleep.

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H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My daughter's mostly trained at night, but I also don't want to deal with changing sheets that often either (I'm pregnant again and it's just too hard). So I got a waterproof mattress cover from "OneStepAhead.com". It just lays over the top sheet and is supposed to hold 6 cups of water - though she'd be wet...so you just have to change her and pull off the waterproof cover and toss it in the wash. They have a deal to get 2 if you'd like to have a pair to rotate in case she wakes at night and you need to change it.

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S.J.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter will also be 5 in March and we're going through the same exact thing! She just cannot wake up in the middle of the night to go pee. I spoke with the Doctor about it a week ago and she said for now just to make her drink at dinner the last time she drinks, have her go to the bathroom before she goes to bed and then also wake her up when you go to bed to have her pee again. She was talking about the alarm pads for when they wet the bed, but she said typically they don't start those until around 6. I'm hoping one day something will trigger in her brain and make her wake up, or have her hold it while she's sleeping because almost every morning her pull up is wet. Good luck, if I find out any new info I'll fill you in!

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B.K.

answers from Washington DC on

my kids ped. said that it is a learned behavior. my oldest was 7 1/2 by the time he stopped using pull ups. all kids are potty trained different at night. i know a couple of his friends that our 9 that sill use them. most kids aren't fully potty trained until around 9. i cut the drinks, woke him up before i went to bed. but he was & still is a deep sleeper that he didnt remember us doing it. just let her cont. to force her will on make her go backward or be scared to go to bed or that she will wet the bed. in time she will be potty trained. dont rush it.

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C.L.

answers from Harrisburg on

A.,

There have been a lot of great responses to your request, but I would say again that if you have not already done so, please check with your pediatrician to make sure there aren't any medical reasons for the bed wetting.

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A.

answers from Washington DC on

Don't worry, she will out grow it. Thank godness we have pull-ups now. I was a very deep sleeper and I wet the bed until I was 7. Back then there were no pull-ups so my mom had to wash sheets all the time.

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M.C.

answers from Dover on

Hello Alex,
The only way my daughter potty trained at night was to put her in panties. Matter of fact the only way she would potty train period was to take her to daycare and put her in panties and within 3 months she got the hang of it. But as u said changing sheets everynight can be a pain.
Your 5 year old daughter is old enough to understand if you tell her youre not going to buy pullup anymore even for bed time and that she has to practice pottying at bedtime. Thats really all the advice i really can give.
WHen she feels her panties wet shewill wake up in time.

Have a good try
M. C

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D.B.

answers from Dover on

Hi A.,

I understand bed wetting has a lot to do with whether the parents were bed wetters. If that's the case, my poor son is in for a world of hurt--I wet the bed until I was 13!!! lol

If you and/or your hubby were bed wetters, that may be a contributing factor. But to deal with your daughter's situation now, I agree with some of the other answers here--put her in panties, get several mattress covers and have her change her own sheets (without any negative words from you) : )
so she doesn't feel shamed while she is taking care of the sheets.

Please let us know if these work for you!!

D.

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K.S.

answers from Washington DC on

It is not uncommon for deep sleepers to be bedwetters. It's not deliberate. Our pediatrician recommmended one of those things that vibrates when it gets wet. Your pediatrician can get more specific.

They do have medications for that, but what they do is shut the kidney down temporarily. I didn't want to go there.

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