Battles with Getting Dressed in the Morning and Putting on Pjs

Updated on April 22, 2010
C.F. asks from Stockton, CA
18 answers

Any suggestions with getting dressed for preschool in the morning or putting on pjs in the evening?? any ideas on what works best?? She is 5 years old.

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So What Happened?

I think the best suggestion was to set a timer or make a game out of it.....we need to play a song and try to get dressed before the song ends.....I also tried the chuck e cheese website for the printable get dressed chart and that is working a little also...

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K.G.

answers from Sacramento on

Go to Chuck E Cheese website and there is a section that is about rewards.
You can print them out and once completed the child gets 10 free tokens.
There is homework, brushing teeth, getting dressed, reading...
You don't have to use it at CEC if you don't like that place, use it as they get a toy, or a treat when the ice cream man comes...
My son LOVES McDonalds happy meals so because Gma has gotten them at least 3 times a week he expects them... I am tying to show him that they are treats and not something to have all the time..

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T.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Put on the clothes she is going to wear the next day at night after her bath.
Voila! No problem in the morning. This works only if she wear soft cotton clothing with elastic waists, etc.

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C.A.

answers from San Francisco on

When we had this problem with getting dressed in the morning we had her pick out what she was wearing the night before and followed through with it the next morning, no matter what. We give her two choices and that's it. As far as pj's go, we let her pick those out as well. When it's 7:30 it's time to start getting ready for bed so I generally tell her, "go in your room and pick out your pj's while I finish up this, or put away that." She does it all on her own. I think giving them more power helps them make choices.
Best of luck,
C.

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J.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Lots of great ideas. With my daughter (now 10), preschool was not about chosing clothes but the problem was actaully changing into them. We had the battle every day. So one day I finally lost it. I secretly threw some clothes in a bag that she didn't see and told her if she didn't get dressed she would go to school in her undies. She of course didn't believe me. But when I was strapping her into her carseat in nothing but her undies, she got the picture. Obviously I gave her her clothes in the parking lot and she dressed before school, but from then on she knew I meant business.

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C.C.

answers from Fresno on

A friend with 5-year old twins suggested this to me, and it has changed our mornings. Go buy one of those sweater hangers with 5 or 6 sections in it (from Target or WalMart, under $20). Then on Sunday, pick out an outfit for each day of the coming week, including socks, underwear, sweater, hair bows, etc. Your daughter should participate in this process. Put the clothes for Monday in the bottom section, the clothes for Tuesday in the next section, etc. We have dance class on Wednesdays, so we put dance clothes and shoes in the 3rd section along with Wendesday's regular clothing. This way there is no argument in the morning. If my daughter says she doesn't like the outfit, I just say, "Well, that's the outfit you picked out for today, and that's what's in today's hanging bin!" And that's the end of that. Honestly, after a few weeks of this system, my daughter stopped arguing. I tell her to go get dressed, and she goes and gets the clothes from the hanging rack and puts them on.

For the PJs you could do the same thing - just put a pair in the hanging rack for each day.

I hope that helps! It has saved my sanity in the mornings!

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M.L.

answers from Redding on

Don't battle. Tell (show) her when the car will be leaving. Telll her that she will be in the car when it leaves. It is her choice wheather she is dressed or not. Remind her of how much time is left every 15 minutes. At the 15 minute warning tell her " you have 15 minutes to get ready to leave. If you aren't dressed, no problem. You can take your clothes in a sack." Then fill a grocery sack with another set of clothes that she isn't currently (not) trying to put on. At the 5 minute warning tell her she has 5 minutes left and you are loading the car. Take everything you need out to the car, including her extra clothes then come back for her and excort her to the car "as she is". You should't have to do this more than a couple times for her to figure out getting dressed in the parking lot at school is not fun.
As for bed time, when it is bed time, it's bed time. Put her in bed as is. It won't hurt her to sleep naked or with her clothes on. She is most likey doing this as a stalling tactic. Once she finds out you mean business and intend to stay on schedule she will stop messing around.

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C.M.

answers from St. Louis on

We had this problem with my 2.5 year old. He wanted to watch cartoons in the morning before daycare. I wanted her to get dressed beforehand...so in order to get her to comply, I made her a 'checklist'.

On the paper, it has 4 'steps'. Step 1 is a picture of a child going to the bathroom with the words Bathroom. The second picture is a child getting dressed and having the words Get Dressed. Picture 3 is teeth brushing and Picture 4 is cartoons which she gets to watch if she does 1-3.

Find out what works as a reward for your child. If he/she wants to watch cartoons or do something else in the morning, make sure that is the 'last step' on the 'must dos' in the morning.

I put this checklist on the fridge and went over it day after day with my daughter. She caught on very quickly!

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M.S.

answers from Sacramento on

I had the same problem with my son, and I just told him I am taking time off his bedtime. So, in the morning I would use 15 minute increments, and in the evening I would tell him that because he wants to take so long we have to get into the bed earlier.

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

We had our son sleep in either in the outfit he was wearing for the next day, or just his underwear so that he'd HAVE to get dressed.

For your daughter, you could do undies and a t-shirt so she'd just have to put on pants and out the door you go.

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N.P.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi C.,

Picking clothes the night before is a good idea, BTW-Its all about your daughter wanting to be in control, and show her independence, please let her dress herself, give her extra few minutes to dress, praise her for a job well done, even if she is not wearing color co-ordinated clothes/socks.

RE: PJ's let her sleep naked if she wants to.

Use a timer to play "beat the clock game "while getting dressed. Keep your cool, her dressing task is a low key event,please dont sweat over it, plus make sure she is getting to bed on time and is well rested, some children like the pace of things slower in the mornings than others.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I am still getting my 7 yo son dressed in the morning for First grade AND putting his jammies on. It is SO frustrating. I know he can do it. I have SEEN him do it. He just HATES to do it. (And I think secretly,, he likes me to dress hi.) I
know that when he DOES do it, I am going to feel the same excitement as I did when I didn't have to buy formula, diapers or carry a diaper bag. I feel ya. Sigh.
We have tried "beat the clock", pick the clothes out the night before, lay the clothes out in the right order, racing each other to get dressed, allowance (flat out bribery), sticker charts, and almost anything else you can think of.
I know he needs to do this independently, but frankly, I am so sick of this that it is a battle I choose NOT to fight anymore. At some point in time it will become ridiculous for me to be dressing him. I'm hoping it's before middle school/ :-)

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R.P.

answers from Sacramento on

Love & Logic Institute--great audio CD's that address this very issue (among tons of others).

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D.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Have you tried letting her pick out her own clothes? Also, laying them out the night before seems to help.

I also have a timer and let my children know that if they are not ready when it goes off, I will take them to school in their pjs.

The same works at night, we give them a time limit to do it themselves and then if they are not done, they go to bed in their regular clothes.

The hardest part about this is letting go of the control and need to match. Also, if she chooses to wear her princess costume, don't fight about it. There are many more important things than fighting with a 5 year old about what she is wearing. (I did, however, draw the line on naked.)

Good luck.

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

the way we've gotten things calmed down in the morning is to pick clothes out at night before we go to bed. This cuts down on all the fights in the morning of what we're going to wear.

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A.M.

answers from Spokane on

We used to go through this every day! I finally decided that my 4 yr old would do nothing else until he was dressed. No breakfast, cartoons, nothing. We were late a few times at first but now it works great. We still get the why do I have to brush my teeth? but we just say, Im not going to answer a question you know the answer to.

Talk to you daughter, let her know that she will not be leaving her room, playing or anything else she "want" till she is dressed lay the clothes out for her and leave the room. when she calls you ask her if she is dressed. when she is upset remind her, calmly, this is her choice and when she is dressed she can come out. in time she will see that it's much easier to do it then fight it.

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L.B.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

My daughter is 7 now and goes to a school that requires uniforms, so getting ready in the morning, at least for school during the week, isn't an issue.
That said on days when uniforms aren't required or on the weekends she dresses herself. She doesn't match most of the time so she looks a little funny but I just walk about 3 paces behind her, and she wears what she wants. I learned not to make a battle out of getting dressed.
The only time I ever veto anything is when she wants to wear shorts in the middle of winter. She has learned to layer clothing so that she is dressed warm enough. Again, she almost never matches. But that's not important. What is important is a stress free morning for mom, the rest is all optional.
If picking out clothing is a problem do that the night before and move on.
As for pjs, let her wear what she wants. Who cares if she goes to sleep in her clothes. She's only sleeping!
Dressing is simply not worth the stress!

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm not sure exactly what the issue with getting dressed is, but I do know that little girls take longer than little boys. I have a grandson and a granddaughter who live with me. The granddaughter is 8. We get her clothes out the night before and I wake her up earlier than my grandson, just to give her that little bit of extra time without having to rush her. It works well. As far as pj's again, you don't say what the issue is, so I can't really comment except to say that if it's taking her a long time to dress, just start a few minutes earlier.

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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

We killed two birds with one stone, and one of mine takes her shower, then gets dressed for the next day and sleeps in them. Not ideal, but it works for her.

M.

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