Back to School Schedule panic...anyone Else?

Updated on August 06, 2014
J.B. asks from Boston, MA
13 answers

Does anyone else go through this phase every year where you know that once your kids are back in school and sports that there is going to be one schedule conflict after another but you can't do anything about it yet because the darn schedules aren't finalized? I hate letting this panic interrupt what's left of summer vacation but every time someone asks me about something in September or October I just want to run screaming.

We start school September 4 and I have that schedule more or less nailed down in terms of back to school nights, PTA meetings, picture days and other things I need to keep on my radar. Then I am teaching a class one night a week (I teach SAT prep in addition to my FT job) starting in September and am adding another class another night in October, which will have Saturday classes too. I have two tutoring students to fit in as well.

The kicker is that my three sons are all playing hockey this year and their season starts in late August but we won't have the schedule until a few days before they start. So among the 3 of them there will be 8-10 games and practices a week. My husband and I can only be so many places at once! Plus my daughter wants to switch to a gym in a town that 20 minutes away from us, which is just not happening now.

My two oldest are both 16 - one will be 17 in November, the other will be 16.5 in September, so both old enough for licenses. That said, neither one has done driver's ed yet (they have to pay for it themselves) so that's another thing - 30 hours of classroom time plus road time for each of them - to fit in before they can help out by at least getting themselves where they need to go, and I don't relish the thought of them hitting the road during the winter, so they will most likely not drive regulary until the spring. I can hire someone to help drive on nights of conflict, but won't know what those are for a few more weeks.

Am I the only one who gets anxious over stuff like this? Other moms I talk to are like "oh, I haven't even thought about the fall yet" so I feel like a neurotic freak over here LOL. Please tell me other people go through this too! If you do, how do you deal with the not knowing and enjoy the time you have left before chaos kicks in again?

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Why do you schedule teaching at night and Sat and tutoring. Drop something or kids give up something. Haven't you ever carpooled? Only you have control of what is scheduled. If it's crazy, then something goes. If you are not willing to drop things, just grin and bear it. I don't understand why everyone schedules so many things these days. When do these kids have time to do homework or just down time?

3 moms found this helpful

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P.R.

answers from Cleveland on

Yes I do. I think I'm dreading the end of summer more than my kids... But I'm also a pretty big believer in not overscheduling and sounds like you have overscheduled yourself... (I also only had 2 kids.) But I would certainly pay for drivers' ed vs let this drag out! Unless you literally don't have the money, why not pay for it? I'm pretty sure my parents did for me and I didn't grow up to be so entitled and spoiled I'm not a productive citizen. It's hurting you as much or more than them that these kids can't drive yet. Hiring someone to drive them will add up quickly. But sorry. To your real question, I'm not overly stressed now but would be if I was you and like I said, really really hate to see summer end.

5 moms found this helpful
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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Just pay for the drivers ed yourself so they can start driving! Unless you truly can't afford it I don't know why you would want to wait, life gets so much less stressful once your kids are able to get themselves to and from where they need to be.
Unless it's a maturity issue, do you not think they are ready to be behind the wheel?

5 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Wow, I would be getting those boys driving NOW. Pay for it yourself, at least for the older one, it's so worth it. Once my kids started driving my life got so much easier, especially since our high school is a forty minute round trip and there are no buses other than to/from school (no good if your kids are staying for sports or music practice.)
I'm telling you, the extra cost of gas/insurance is worth it, and like you said, you can only be in one place at a time!

3 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Your schedule is giving me anxiety;). You have a lot going on! I don't have to plan like you because I simply don't have as much to do and I know my schedule will all work out. Can you drop the tutoring and/or second class?

2 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

I have one night a week I am worried about. My husband will be at work, I work at my part time job from 5-8, one boy has theatre from 4-5:30 and both boys have swim lessons from 6-7. I will have to be creative and find a way for my son to get from theatre to swim lessons, and figure out how I will feed them supper. Thankfully that schedule is only until the end of January.

1 mom found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Why not pay for driver's ed yourself? My parents paid for it for all 5 of us kids and my kids will have it paid for as wel. They will also hopefully get cars...if for no other reason than to help us out by alleviating some of the scheduling conflicts.

My husband worked 2 hours away for three years and just got local again last May. So I was driving 3 kids three different directions 5 days a week. It works because I trust my kids and the people I have to leave them with on occassion. Otherwise, I'd have anxiety. But your kids are old enough to be left alone or also ask friends to help drive. Sometimes my friend will stop at a local gas station on her way to dance to grab my daughter, and sometimes my neighbor will take my youngest son to baseball practice so I can get the other one dropped off...you just make it work.

1 mom found this helpful

L.L.

answers from Dover on

It drives me crazy that everyone likes to wait til the last minute to provide you with the details you need to work out your schedule. Just because they don't plan ahead does not mean everyone should have to. Makes me crazy (this is not just with school and activities but family events as well).

1 mom found this helpful
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L.S.

answers from San Francisco on

My husband and I are both teachers so I have to deal with our teaching/office hour schedules, our committee work meetings and other stuff. Our two kids are at different schools and this year my 15 year old will be attending community college classes two days a week in addition to high school, plus volunteer tutoring and peer teen court. My other son swims five days a week. One kid's school requires carpooling, which is sort of a help, but can be a scheduling nightmare. I am so like you with all of this. I actually have little panic attacks. If my husband forgets to tell me about a meeting he has or a change in his schedule, everything sort of falls apart. I seriously can't imagine doing all of this as a single parent. I would like to get my teen started on driver's ed, but the truth is we can't afford to get a car for him and we won't really be able for him to use one of ours due to our schedules. So yea, I completely get this. And I really hate it when a particular schedule is just randomly changed at the last minute.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.H.

answers from Chicago on

I have a minor version of yours, My son is going into 1st grade. This is where boy scouts will begin, I want to put both the kids in swimming over the winter. And Possible put my son in gymnastics again. With all that, I know the days open for swimming and for Gymnastics, but I do not kn ow when boy scouts will be, or my hope is also to get my daughter into a dance class, but not sure what day time will be best. I do not want to double/over book either of them. ugh.

I am not letting it get to me. I am trying to take it one day at a time.

1 mom found this helpful

V.S.

answers from Reading on

Kids are not required to drive at 16. Wait until next summer.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.H.

answers from New York on

Ugh - I'm right there with you. Trying to decide what day to do my Girl Scout meetings so others can plan THEIR schedules, when to schedule art classes for both the kids because of course they don't want to take them together, when will the dang sport practices be, etc. now I'M starting to get stressed about it, and we don't start school until after Labor Day!

ETA - why do they have to pay for drivers ed? I personally see that as something I would cover (insurance too) since it would directly improve quality of life for all of us at home.

A.G.

answers from Dallas on

My 16yo took driver's ed last summer when he was 15. This is the first school year that he will have a car, so our lives will all be much easier. He will be helping me with picking up my 5th grader from school some days. I'm a teacher, and we're at 3 different schools in 2 different towns juggling different after-school activities, so I'm thrilled that he's driving. We don't over schedule, though. I tutor and have occasional meetings, and each of the boys usually only has only one activity each week. Life still gets busy. We all know how that goes. :)

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