Babysitting for My Neighbor.

Updated on February 01, 2016
E.S. asks from Phoenix, AZ
20 answers

I babysit a 5 yr. And 17 month old. $215.00 a week total. 6:30-6:50a to 3:50- up till maybe 5:30p (i never know for sure what time theyll come home that day) started sitting in August 2015. I an certified in first aid, cpr, food handlers card, and a mom of 3. Neighbor and I not close friends, but friendly. When payday arrives they'll ask if they can pay me less than 215.00 because they're behind on bills (160.00 for example) then they'll pay me the rest plus the 250.00 for that week. The reason why they're asking me this a lot is because when I first started sitting, I said "pay me when you can". Now I have bills I'm behind on and resenting them cuz they live better than I do like coming home with fun stuff a lot. For me 215.00 is not enough for me I have 3 kids. I do have a husband who works f/t . I don't like saying no you have to pay me 215 a week. I do take care of their two bigger doggies, and dishes everyday, sometimes more house cleaning. I take kids to Dr. Appts. when they need to go. I get frustrated when they'll call me and say I don't have to come over cuz they have a day off, and I don't get paid. That hurts me money wise. I say okay like its no problem. My question is would it be fair if I told them I need 215.00 a week no matter what( personally I do want to get paid more, but I don't know how much). Even if I don't work a day. I called in a total of 2 separate days since August. But really I still would even want to get paid even if I call in. Is this too much to ask for?

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So What Happened?

First I want to start by saying THANKYOU so much for all your responses. Everyone helped me out! I actually went on an interview last week and now I am employed. I told my employer I wanted to work part time weekends for three months then full time because I wanted to give my babysitting family a three month notice. My employer said that's great. I did tell the mom and dad im putting in my 3 month notice and they said "okay." they gave a little weird comment I just brushed it off. If this helps anyone: BE PROFESSIONAL FROM THE VERY BEGINNING! CONTRACT!!

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K.D.

answers from Jacksonville on

You're not overcharging. In my area, if they were in daycare, the 5 yr old would basically be going for free, as the $215 would only cover the younger. As others said, set up a contract. When I had my daughter with a private sitter, I paid the same amount per week regardless of how many times she went. We were allowed 2 weeks "vacation" where we didn't have to pay if she didn't go those weeks. We paid if my daughter was sick a day, we paid if the babysitter was sick a day. The trade off was that the rate was cheaper than daycare and my daughter got individualized attention. Get things more formalized.

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W.W.

answers from Washington DC on

ETA: I was an AD for Kindercare. A 17 month old was $300 a week for full time care. We were open from 6AM to 6PM. We charged $25 for every 15 minutes the parent was late for pick up. They HAD to pay for the week in advance. You didn't show? You still paid. We had to have people there to meet the state ratio numbers.

A 5 year old - well - they were Kindergarten and considered before and after care - that was $150 a week - and transportation to and from school was included.

If you are transporting their children? You MUST set up an LLC and get insurance. This is a BUSINESS you are running. Should an accident happen while they are with you?? You will be liable. You need to call your insurance company and find out what they will and will NOT cover....

E.,

Welcome to mamapedia!!

You need a signed contract with these people. Period. End of story.

You need to set up an account for your business, because that's what this is - a business. And you need a contract that will protect you and ensure you get paid.

If they can't pay you in full? Well, lack of planning on their part doesn't constitute an emergency on your part. We all have obligations.

$215 a week for up to 10 hours of work? You are grossly underpaid. Call your local day care's and find out what they are charging. Or call a nanny company and find out what they are paying their nanny's. That's what you are - a Nanny.

You need to stand up for yourself and you need to stop being a door mat for them.

13 moms found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Boston on

You are, in my opinion, ridiculously under-paid. But call around to other in-home providers in your area and ask was the going rate is. So first, you need to figure out a rate that respects what you do - it's fine if you want to offer services under market rate, but make sure that your clients know that you know what your services are worth.

You also need a contract that spells out what you get paid, when you get paid, and how to handle days when they don't need your services. A typical arrangement would be to offer 5-10 "free" days a year where with advance notice, they tell you that they're going to be on vacation and you don't get paid. Every other day? You get paid.

FWIW, when I need full-time childcare in the summer for my 2 boys, who are 10 & 11, I pay $12.50 an hour up to 8 hours a day and time-and-half after 8 hours. I paid between $500 and $600 a week this summer for my full-time nanny and now that I just need her before and after school, I pay her $25 a day for 4-6 PM and $20 a day for 7-8:15 AM. She works 3 hours a day and makes $225 a week. Is this because I'm wealthy or generous? I am neither, I can assure you - I pay this because it's what childcare in my area costs.

Please value your services enough to stand up for yourself. It may be awkward, but they are taking advantage of you.

11 moms found this helpful

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

no, of course it's not too much to ask. they are taking advantage of you.
but you have invited and encouraged them to do so.
i have little patience for people who agree to a price, then later realize they've charged too little, and then just turn all resentful and sullen and complainy instead of going to their client and saying 'we need to renegotiate. this isn't working for me.'
they ask if they can pay you less. apparently you say yes. if you said firmly 'i'm sorry, no. i have bills too and need to be paid our agreed-upon amount immediately' they would either pay up or stop being your PITA.
it's none of your business what 'fun stuff' they come home with. you've let them know that paying you is not a priority, and they're doing exactly that.
ditto the days off. you have to TELL them. when i was a stupid young mother i made the same assumption about my professional daycare mother. the day after i left her a check that was too little she met me at the door and courteously but firmly informed me that my check was short and that she had been obliging in letting me have a flexible schedule, but that unexpected days off were not 'free.' i apologized profusely and never made the mistake again. sent her flowers too.
i don't understand why you don't just negotiate a fair price with them. you're already resentful at being underpaid, so why not just tell them what you actually want?
khairete
S.

10 moms found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

You are being taken advantage of and only you can allow that to happen. Practice saying NO and get good at it!

You can't be Miss Nice all the time because people will step all over you, like this family is doing. Work on your backbone and stand firm for what is right for you.

Maybe this started as a nice thing to do for neighbors but you really need a firm contract.

There are some moms on here who run at home daycares and preschools. I hope they see this and give you some guidance.

10 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

How many kids you have or what your bills are is not a relevant factor, so don't even argue that point. How many other bills they have is also irrelevant or what "fun stuff" they come home with is also irrelevant. You and they should not be using that to determine how much they have left over to pay you.

Not being paid? Not knowing when they are coming home? Being asked to take care of dogs might be okay if negotiated ahead, same with doctor appointments (although I can't imagine parents not wanting to handle those)? Not acceptable. But to not go over "because they have a day off" sounds ridiculous if it wasn't contracted for, and so is not being paid for all the overtime.

So they are taking advantage of you, and you are permitting it. "Pay me when you can" was a nice gesture, but it set a precedent that this is a casual arrangement instead of a job. You need to put a stop to that.

You need a child care contract with the hours (including drop off/pick up times) spelled out, with a provision for overtime. Usually there is a grace period for picking up (such as "3:45-4:00 PM). You spell out school vacations, sick days, professional development days etc. on the school calendar, and then you establish a policy for unannounced school closings like snow days and power outages. You have a payment system set up - they pay on time, but you invoice them or give them other documentation so they can deduct their payments on their taxes. You write it out, you spell out things like dishes, housekeeping, medical appointments (including fees for your gas), and dog care and anything else, and both you and one parent sign in. You also put in some provision for late charges.

You both are treating this like "extra money for a stay-at-home-mom" rather than professional day care. If you don't want to be a professional, then you tell them it isn't working out. If you do want to be one, then you tell them they have to comply even if it makes a rift in your neighborhood relationship.

10 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Babysitting is your business - so run it like a business.
You need a written out contract spelling out your terms, pay - everything.
It needs to be for a set time (they'll have to sign a new contract annually, or every 6 months - what ever term you choose).
If they don't pay you (or owe you) then you don't allow them to 'run a tab' and you don't work for them until you are paid in full for services rendered.
You basically have to force them into making paying you a priority for them.
And if they don't like that, then fire them and find another client.
Research what is typical for a Nanny contract - and then make some changes.

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C.W.

answers from Santa Barbara on

ETA**. I don't know why you don't consider yourself professional. They get more one on one attention than centers. Give them notice that you are changing things and can comply or try to find someone willing to work overtime for less than minimum wage caring for child humans. My daughter who is in university full time makes more as a server and a high school softball coach...no degree yet. Give merit to the job you do...it's so important.

I wouldn't do any job for $4/hour well actually less than $2/hour per child! You take care of two kids, two dogs and also cleaning. You don't get paid as scheduled? This isn't a volunteer role. They are not a family in poverty so you are not getting paid by the state in a poor area.

Grow a spine and have some rules that must be followed. Write a contract! I even have a contract with house sitters or dog trainers. You could work very part time at target or in a restaurant and make significantly more. Unless you are in the corporate arena, I wouldn't expect sick or vacation pay (unless that's in the contract).

I paid my fairly new step mother $8/hour plus a gym membership and gas for part time work 19 years ago. I hate it when people minimize paying the person who takes care of their children over 11 hours per day. No way! They are children not just plants you are watering.

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S.H.

answers from Santa Barbara on

You should make a contract and have them agree to it.

Some in home places I looked at back in the day had a $1 per minute late after 15 minutes. The lady felt guilty explaining it to me ( a potential customer), but said because many in the past had not respected her time she needed to add that. This may not fit in your arrangement, but it is just an example of what is out there that they would need to deal with if you were not available.

Nothing you are asking for is unusual and they would expect it in any other professional exchange. You started as 'nice' and now you resent it. You may even need to look for another job. I have a feeling this neighbor is convenient for you, so that may be a reason to stay.

They will not be able to find a better deal (other than maybe grandma), so you can stand up for yourself and write it out. Heck send your rough draft here. I am sure there will be people will to give input.

6 moms found this helpful
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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You need a contract. You can negotiate that contract with them. You include things like a clause that says you get paid $215/week, in advance, and you can suggest a late fee if it's not paid in full in advance. You can propose that they pay you the full amount even if they call off. You can ask for paid 5 paid vacation days and 5 paid sick days.

Then they have a few options. They can accept, they can make you a counter offer, or they can find a new nanny. Once you agree on terms, you put in writing and you all sign it. I would hope that none of you get emotional about the negotiation - negotiating is a part of life every day.

Having had kids in childcare for a total of 8 years, I would say that most of your requests are reasonable - to be paid in full in advance, to be paid even if they call off.

I would suggest that asking to be paid when you call off may not be reasonable, because if you call off or go on vacation, they have to pay someone else to watch their kids - essentially paying double for those days. Or they have to take off of work, which may cause them to lose pay - how can they pay you if they are not being paid that day?

I would also like to point out that if you always tell them ok when they ask to pay late or when they call off at the last minute, how are they supposed to know that you are unhappy with this arrangement? Do not be resentful - this situation is occurring because YOU have been unclear about your expectations. You can't tell them it's OK to be paid late and then be angry when they do what you suggested. They cannot read your mind.

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R.S.

answers from Denver on

You are just generally charging too little and being taken advantage of. Your rate would be low average for one child. Look for another job if that is what you want to do and then give them 2 weeks notice. At over 40 hours a week, you are not making even close to minimum wage, probably half, even if you watched 2 other kids at that amount, it would be really low.
I don't want to be uncaring about their situation but if they aren't making a lot of money, there are programs to get support for childcare. You are pretty much a nanny for them at a fraction the cost.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

As to the reasonable amount to charge, call other day care providers and ask how much they charge.

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

They are taking advantage of you and they must know this. Why you have allowed this to happen is on you. Honestly, I think the best thing to do is give 2 weeks notice that you can't watch their kids after you have lined up other kids to babysit.

These people don't respect you and I don't know if you can change that at this point in time.

Next time, you need a contract. I would also set a monthly rate that is non negotiable. (When my daughter was in the Goddard School, I paid whether she was there or not. I paid to hold her spot. This means we paid the same amount even when we were on vacation or she was sick.) Additionally, I always paid my girls piano teachers a monthly amount even though some months had 4 Thursday's and some had 5 Thursdays). I paid at the beginning of the month. The only time I was reimbursed was when the piano teacher canceled. Also, you need to have set hours. If they are late charge them $X dollars for every 15 minutes they are late.

Perhaps you should have a seperate fee schedule for other things you can do ie. Dog care, doctors appointments, laundry, dishes etc. I would make this per month and just add it on to the child care fee.

FYI...my 17 yo daughter makes $10 per hour babysitting on a Friday and Saturday night.

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

For two children that is very cheap. Everywhere I have lived about $800 a month covers the cost of one child. You are asking too little. Also, you need a set pick up time and if they are late they pay extra. This is normal procedure. Also, they need to pay the full amount each time. If they cannot pay the full amount tell them they need to find someone else. You need to have a contract with them that states the rules.

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S.S.

answers from Atlanta on

You are being taken advantage of.

You allowed this to happen. YOU can change it. But you will have to grow a back bone and stand up for yourself.

There are valid points being made here by many people. I hope you heed their warnings and find out about your insurance and setting up a business.

3 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

In my area at an in-home daycare, the charge is normally between $175-200 under 2, and $75-150 for two and over, depending on hours. So if you take the cheapest of the two, you aren't severely underpaid where I live. You accepted that rate and told them it's fine to pay you whenever, so unfortunately you set this up yourself. I understand as a mom we try to help EVERYONE all the time, but that needs to stop.

You need to tell them what your conditions are, with a contract. If they can't agree, then the situation no longer works for you. No late payments, no not paying for days they take off, no coming late, etc.

You need to look up rates where you live and find out what the going rate is. Charge them that. You need to decide what hours work for you, and tell them that's all you'll do. You need to stop saying "okay" when you're not okay with it. If YOU are calling out, and your contract doesn't give you so many days off, then you don't get paid.

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T.M.

answers from Tampa on

I used a home daycare for both my children until they started school. It was wonderful for my kids and I don't regret it. I asked my provider what she charged and I paid her that. I don't know how you came to your pay rate. I didn't have a written contract with her and it caused some issues over the years. For instance, she initially said that she expected one paid vacation per year. I was fine with that, but it morphed into much more over the years. I was also fine with the unexpected sick day here and there. However, there was one year that I didn't get any actual vacation because I used it all covering my babysitter's vacation/sick days. It is reasonable for them to pay a weekly rate to hold their spots whether they bring their kids or not. I don't think that you are automatically entitled to get paid call out days though... The parents then have to either pay someone else to watch the kids or take off work unexpectedly to cover.

If you aren't happy with this arrangement, then give them a few weeks notice. It sounds like they are flaky with payment anyways.

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D..

answers from Miami on

Oh heavens. Isn't there a job in a daycare that you could get? You'd make more money and you would get paid regularly and you wouldn't taken advantage of. Tell them that they need to pay you on time now the entire amount because you are behind on your own bills.

You don't have a contract with these people. That's why you don't get paid when you don't work. If they had their kids in a regular daycare, they'd have to pay even if the kids were out because that's the contract that they sign. In a daycare, you would get paid the same amount every week regardless of how many kids were out.

I hope that you go get a job that you don't have to worry about this with...

And I'm sorry, but I do NOT think that you are overcharging these people. Find out how much daycare costs. Then you will know.

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N.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Well, you're charging them more than a child care center would. They'd pay by the week no matter what though. Even if they miss a day they have to pay for their child to have that spot.

You are not a babysitter if you're going to their home, you're a nanny and those jobs include light housekeeping every single day. It's your job to cook and wash the dishes you use but I wouldn't think it's your job to clean their house overall. That's a totally different job description. That would pay you more for sure, you'd be getting paid for house keeping duties plus the kid duties. So stop, just don't do more than you dirty. If you're loading the dishwasher and there is room for a few more pieces then it would seem petty to not pop the other stuff in there.

When I worked as a nanny I was contract labor. They paid me X amount of dollars for just watching the kids and then I had a list of my extra duties. I got paid a specific amount for each load of laundry I did and a different fee for each day that the mom had me start their dinner. I took the kids with me everywhere I wanted/needed to go. I didn't charge the family gas money because I was going places that "I" was going.

They didn't hold out taxes on me but we did do the paperwork for them to file the child care benefit on their taxes. I also claimed every dime I made.

In child care most kids are there 10.5 hours too. They usually go in before mom/dad's work so around 7:15am/7:30am then don't get picked up until mom/dad get off work then fight traffic. So hardly ever picked up before 5:30pm/5:45pm. Plus they get 2 full meals plus 2-3 snacks. They have fully trained and certified teachers who have education before they're ever hired for their jobs and have done 20+hours of continuing education each year to keep their jobs. They also follow a purchased curriculum that will prepare the 5 year old for school, again, if he's not already a full time student each day for either Pre-K or in Kindergarten.

And they get minimum wage or just above it. A toddler room worker has 6 toddlers, 2 year old classroom has 8 kids per teacher, the 3 year old teachers have 12 kids each, and still gets only the hourly around minimum wage. A 4 year classroom teacher has 15 kids, if he's in the 5 year old classroom (not in school) then they might have 18 kids per teacher. If he's in kindergarten then when he's not in school they can have up to 20 kids each, all for a good old minimum wage or just above.

So no, I think you are way over charging this family for just child care/picking up after the kids. Yes, I have a bias in favor to a fully licensed child care center. It's actual classrooms and the kids come in ready to learn. They are exposed to much more organized education and they do better in school overall when they've been to child care or at least a preschool style center or Pre-K before Kindergarten.

I think you need to be honest with the family and tell them that you don't want to watch the kids. It's too much for you. Then they'll be free to enroll the kids in full time child care and you won't be having to do so much every day.

You can always call around to the local towns and see what the cost of regular child care would be. Again, they offer full preschool types of classes and have basic first aid/CPR plus certifications/degrees in early childhood development/hours of continuing education hours/and more. Plus they have a lot more kids in their care. T

hen charge them less than they'd pay in regular child care BUT negotiate a contract with them where they pay you every Monday morning, the full weeks pay. Regardless of them staying home during the upcoming week, they should pay you by the week. Then if they don't have the money on hand and in your hand you tell them sorry, and you leave.

Tell them they can take it or leave it.

I think you're trying to do a good job for them and they're trying to make it on what they have.

If you want to check in to it for just general information you can google child care assistance guidelines. It should have a link somewhere to show how much income gets how much assistance. They'll have to use a child care provider the state agrees to pay though. But you'd be free to not have a nanny job.

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

Babysitting is not the kind of job where you get paid sick leave, if you call in they have to then pay someone else to do it and it would not be fair to ask them to pay twice. That said, it is perfectly reasonable to set a weekly amount that does not change unless you are the one to cancel a day (so if they cancel you still get paid). As to how much is reasonable for before/after school care try calling around. One place to check is with the local elementary schools where they have before/after care and find out how much they charge for the same service.

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