Baby Startling Himself Awake and Can't Fall Back Asleep

Not to harp on the swaddling tip but...we had a hard time with swaddling until we got the Happiest Baby on the Block VIDEO. It showed us how to do it better than the book and I was able to see the mistake I was making and swaddle better so that my baby couldn't wriggle out. I requested the video through my library and it was one of the best things I did...

I see that you tried swaddling, but did you try it with a kiddapotamus(spelling)? I tried swaddling my daughter with just blankets and she wiggled her way out of them. The "Kidd" works so much better because you velcro the sides down...
It worked wonders for me...she was swaddled like that until she was almost 4 months old.

try using the Baby Whisperer's EASY method for a schedule, and the Happiest Baby on the Block 5 s's method. Those two combined will make cio not be a needed thing (at that age)
EASY - when the baby wakes up it Eats. After you feed it, then it has Activity - bouncy seat, tummy time, sitting up and playing with toys, swing, exersaucer, etc. When the baby gets fussy check the B's - boredom, butt or burp. If it's none of those then off to Sleep. Don't wait for the baby to do more than get the tiniest bit fussy, then see what is causing the fusses - if it's just that they needed their diaper change do that, but if it's not the activity is boring, the butt is dirty or they have to burp, then put them down. This may happen after as short as 45 minutes, don't freak, it really means they are tired.
Now, to get them to sleep use the 5 s's. Swaddle the baby, hold the baby on their side and sway as they suck on something (paci, your knuckle or their finger/thumb) and make a shush noise. This will calm your baby. When the baby is calm, but not asleep yet, keeping them swaddled lay them in the bed. I like to pat them instead of sway after a minute or two cause you can still pat after they are put down but you can't sway, so pat the baby and continue patting gradually decreasing it as you put them in the bed. Also continue the shushing as you put them down, again gradually getting quieter.
If you do these two you will find a well rested, easily managed baby in no time.

I bet all your guy needs is a bit of tight swaddling!!

I held and rocked my babies while they were as young as yours. They slept better in arms. You can also wear your baby so you get stuff done. Baby gets the mom touch time and you get stuff done--both win.

My oldest son is 3 years old and goes to sleep just fine, giving lots of touch and holding your baby now won't ruin him. :)

Here's a local group that can help you explore your babywearing options:

http://lcbabywearers.wordpress.com/

This is very common and normal developmentally as your baby is now transitioning from sleepy baby to awake alert baby. The startling is actually something that happens to adults as well, but we have just learned how to sleep through it and babies have not yet done so yet.
It occurs at 10 min. after they fall asleep, 20 min. after they fall asleep and again at 45 min. This occurs as you go from one type of sleep mode to another.

A very good swaddle holding your baby's arms in place will help. So when they start, if the arms don't flail, they are less likely to wake up. Second, if there is one of those intervals that they are more likely to wake up (45 min is VERY VERY common as is 10 min. but some kiddos hang out til the 20 min mark), walking into the room quietly and gently placing your hands on thier arms through that start can help a great deal. Especially the 10 min. mark point. So as they start, if their arms are held in place, they settle right back into the next stage of sleep. The 45 min. mark is particularly key as that is what takes them from one Sleep cycle to the next deeper sleep cycle, the second of which is more restorative to the child.

A pp mentioned Dr. Weissbluth's book. I agree that you will learn more about sleep and sleep patterns and sleep development. However, as a method for teaching your child to sleep, I think he takes an extreme position on allowing your child to cry out. And let's face it, who wants to hear their child cry!! It's their defense mechanism for saying their is something wrong!!!

For teaching sleep in a more gentle approach, I recommend Secrets of the Baby Whisperer and the Sleep Lady's guide.

The Sleep Lady
http://www.amazon.com/Good-Night-Sleep-Tight-Helping/dp/1...

Tracy Hogg
http://www.amazon.com/Secrets-Baby-Whisperer-Connect-Comm...

Best of luck! And you are in good company! Most mom's go through the same thing!

Have you tried white noise like a womb sound or heartbeat? They have them that are cry sensitive and start the sound when they fuss. My son uses a cd that he has had since was a baby even now, every night, and he is 3 1/2. I used to baby sit for kids who were 5 using theirs and they were always out by the 3rd song because it is so routine!

I didn't read all of the comments, but the only thing that worked for my son was to position him on his side (I talked it over with my pediatrician). He has been a great sleeper since. Good luck!

Go rent the DVD "Happiest Baby On The Block". This video SAVED MY LIFE. I had severe post-partum depression when my child was born, and she was not a sleeper at all. She literally stayed awake for 12-15 hours at a time, then would fall asleep for an hour to hour and a half, then be awake for another 12-15 hours before sleeping again (and this was from 3 weeks old to 3 months old).

I got that book and DVD, and I swear that EVERY parent on the planet should have it. My child is now 2 1/2 years old and she truly is THE HAPPIEST child anyone has ever met. Good luck!

A couple of things that worked with me...

1) Warm the bed first. I'd take a heating pad and warm up the bed (including blanket) some so that my daughter would transition easier from my warm arms to the cold bed. It seemed to help a bunch in getting her to transfer better. I wish I'd known to do this with my son too - I know it would have helped.

2) During the first 3 months or so I had my son sleeping in a lightweight car seat carrier because he wouldn't stay asleep. Being slightly upright and the seat forming around him seemed to help since he refused to be swaddled.

3) With my son, I also needed to create some "white noise" as he would startle and wake at the slightest noise. I hooked up an air filter in his room and the fan on it seemed to work well.

You may have tried these things already, but I thought I'd mention them in case any of them might help.

Good luck!

As a rookie mom with a premie baby, we had issues with this early on. Solution, a great swaddle. My sister-in-law bought us a saddle that has velcro so the baby is snuggly in. He managed to free himself (an arm or hand) a few times in the beginning and didn't seem to like it too much but after a few days no issues. When he gets swaddled for bedtime (around 9pm) he gets a bottle and falls asleep instantly. When he wakes in the morning (7-9 am) he is happyu and smiling in his little swaddle. This method has also been recommended by several moms in my new moms group.

I would try any or all of the following ;)
Feed him. Some babies clump feed at night. Is it gas? Burp him. Push his knees up to his chest to help get any gas out. Change him. Put him in a swing. Play music. White noise. (For a while, a hairdryer calmed my baby when she was about 2 months old. She needed something louder than her! I would turn it on for about 30 seconds or a minute and it was enough to get her attention.) And finally, let him cry it out. It's difficult, but sometimes necessary to get him out of the habit. I'm still working on that myself ;) Good luck!

Don't worry -- you, and your son, are on the right track!! Babies go through a major sleep change between the ages of 3 1/2 to 4 months old, or so. So what might have been working for your son perfectly up until now, may be completely changing!

Your son is at the very earliest stages of "learning" how to sleep, in conjunction with his growing understand that there is a big world around him! Studies have shown that the transitions between sleep stages (i.e. awake to non-REM sleep, to REM sleep, etc.) are tough on the little ones at first. The babies wake/cry during the transition and simply need to learn over time how to manage and soothe themselves through the transitions. This may be part of the "startling himself" you are seeing.

I strongly suggest getting a hold of a book regarding sleep training methods. There are many good ones out out there, so ask your friends what they have used. I have had wonderful success with "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." It is a research-based book by a Pediatrician in Chicago (Northwestern Hospital), Marc Wiessbluth, MD. It talks about the sleep needs at every age through adolescence, plus sound advice for the most common problems during every age period. This book can give you several options for helping your little one get into a healthy bedtime routine.

By the way...6:00-6:30pm is an excellent bedtime for your child's age!! Please don't let other Moms bully or scare you into thinking that one decision can harm your child for life. This simply isn't true. We've ALL been Rookie Moms at one time!

I would really recommend "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." I have three children and used this approach with all of them. Happily, I am the envy of other parents for my "great sleepers" The book was recommended by my pediatrician after the birth of my first and I often lend it out to friends when sleep problems creep up. It's very easy to use and doesn't require you to read the whole book to get started. Who can do that when your exhausted, right? Some people feel it's extreme, but it does give "gentler' methods as well. It just takes longer to see results. You have to do what is within your own comfort level and you know your little one better than anyone else. Just remember, sleeping is a skill that you teach. Just like all the other wonderful things you will teach your child, good sleeping habits are a skill that lasts a lifetime. And, crying doesn't always mean distress in a child over three months. Though it seems maddening, this difficult stage will pass before you know it. Just follow your gut and do what feels right for you and your family. Good luck!!!!

It is a stage most babies go through. Try a sleep sack at night and durring nap times. Hang in there all babies outgrow this!!!!!

Hi A.,

The begin, 6:30 p.m. is way too early to put a baby to sleep. That's way he keeps waking up. Leting him cry until you can no longer take it isn't the route to go either. He'll grow feeling unwanted and resentful. These are verying importamt times for infants. When you don't respond to his crys it's basically telling him that he's the least important being in your life. You are the only person that your child trusts at this age. You need to let him know that you're there for him.

Holding him, talking or singing to him, or just holding him while you have music on is comforting to him. Laying or sittng on the floor with him while he's on the floor on a comfortable blanket is also comforting and re-assuring.

I friend of mine had a terrible accident when his sons were very youngm, his youngest was 6 months old when his wife walked out on him and left him with the boys. His youngest is not 19 years old and just began trusting women in general because his mother walked out on them when he was 6 months old.

Hold your child, nuture him and ignore the comments that you'll get from your family about holding him too much. He needs that from you right now. Believe me you'll have a very beautiful relationship with him as he begins to grow up. I have a 20 year old son and we have a great relationship. All because I held him, talked to him, danced with him, read to him, listend to music with him, etc. when he was an infant and throughout his life.

Enjoy motherhood!

J.

I totally agree with the previous poster....you're on the right track. I too just had a baby in September (my third) and, up until a few nights ago, she'd been sleeping GREAT...since 5 weeks old. Like the other poster said, they go through changes. You're little one just might have a harder time settling down. That's exactly how my 2nd son was and it was maddening. You really put yourself through the ringer when you're in and out of their room for hours trying to get them to STAY asleep.

Unfortunately, I don't have any magical words of wisdom though, but here for support because I feel your pain. Will he take a paci? The only problem w/this is then you'll be in there how many times a night to plop it back in. But it just sounds like you need to get him settled down in the beginning just so he can fall into a deep enough sleep.

Although I haven't read it, I have heard good things about Weissbluth's book. Try it, it can't hurt.

And one bit of advice, listen to your gut. This is YOUR child and only YOU know him best. Rocking, holding, soft music...this may work for OTHER babies, but not all. None of that worked for any of my 3 kids. They all wanted to be nursed to sleep, which I have no problem with. It was the waking up 15 minutes later. I eventually had to let all of mine cry at one time or another. This was MY choice and what worked for MY kids. You need to do what's right for you and your family. Like the other mom said, don't let people bully you with advice. You'll get some really great advice on here, but will also get the people who think you should do it their way.

Oh, and w/the swaddling, do you have a swaddling blanket? The miracle blanket or the one they sell at BRU? Those worked wonders for me. A regular ol' blanket isn't going to keep them wrapped up tight like those blankets.

Good luck!!!

I know it's bad, but the only thing that worked for me was to put my babies on their tummy. I have a seven month old now that won't sleep on his back at all.

Try to play with him keep him occupied for a little longer.
8PM bed time works out pretty good. A regular routine, dinner, bath, play, sing or read then bed. The extra awake time may tire him, he may need a couple of weeks for the new regimen.
Do you lay him on his back? He may need to lay on his stomach. Blanket sleepers are the best to keep a chill from creeping up,a and not worry about too much weight from covers.
My daughter cried when she was a little chilly, I didn't realize I always felt warm but she didn't tolerate coolness
the same as me.