Baby Shower - Salt Lake City,UT

Updated on July 20, 2011
J.N. asks from Salt Lake City, UT
12 answers

It's been so long since I've been involved in a baby shower. I think I've only gone to 1 (just as a guest) in the last 8-10 years! I don't know what's considered standard anymore. So a few questions:

-Food: I was thinking of holding about 1 or 2 pm on a weekend and only having very LIGHT refreshments (cake, maybe nuts or crackers, a punch bowl) but all the sites I've looked at seem to suggest more is standard. What do you think?

-Games: How many should I plan? Do most women prefer silly, thoughtful, or something else entirely?

-Scheduled end or Open House? Guest list looks pretty big, although I doubt they will all come. Can it be done as an open house and still be fun/have games/etc?

-Decorations: I don't even know where to begin...

I'm feeling very overwhelmed. I'm almost positive that nobody else is planning on throwing me a shower. This is my last baby, and probably the last in the family, and it feels like everybody is just done with it. (In fact, some people seem to have the opinion that since it's not my first, there's no need for a shower. But my youngest right now is 8 years old...) I want to have fun and celebrate this last baby, but I'm on a very tight budget and I'm wondering if it would be better for me to just save my money and buy baby stuff with it instead (I have literally nothing left from before, we got rid of everything years ago!).

Finally, is it tacky to throw a shower for myself?

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So What Happened?

Ok, so I see that it's totally bad to do a baby shower for myself. At least I didn't actually commit such a blunder.

My husband would be more than happy to suggest/hint to someone about a baby shower, but there is nobody. That's why I was thinking of it myself in the first place.

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answers from Lake Charles on

I'm making my mom throw mine, the first one I had was like chicken salad mini sandwiches, cake, punch and mints/nuts maybe some chips and dip? We didn't play games we just hung out (it was mostly family) A neat thing to do that I'm doing this time is having "mocktails" like fake martinis or margaritas, look online for some recipes. Do you have a sister in law or mom, aunt, cousin that would be willing to put her name on the invite as host?

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answers from Norfolk on

Yes, it is considered very poor form to throw yourself a shower. You can, however, host something like a "Sip & See" after the baby is born. This is popular for babies that aren't the first when it is seen as inappropriate to have a shower. A Sip & See can be done as an open house with light refreshments and punch. Games are generally difficult to do if you don't have everyone there at the same time and at my shower(s) most of the time has been used eating and opening presents, I hardly had any time to socialize.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

Yes, it is tacky to throw yourself a shower.

You can hint around, or outright ask a friend to throw you one, but do not throw one for yourself.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from San Antonio on

Don't throw a shower for yourself. You already said that you are on a tight budget. Buy your baby the things it needs (hello thrift stores and craigslist!). Then once baby arrives, have an open house or brunch where people are invited to come see the baby and say hello to you. If they want to bring a gift then, then that'd be great. On that brunch day, have a friend or someone make fruit kabobs or tortilla pinwheels or other such small snacks for guests.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Harrisburg on

I know alot of people frown on throwing your own shower, for your first or last babies. So I would suggest throwing a meet the baby shower!

It can follow the same guidlines as a 'normal' shower but you would throw it a few weeks after your LO is born so everyone can meet him/her.

For your other questions: Light food is fine at that hour just let people know on the invite that light refreshments will be provided. Games are fine but not expected-I personally don't like them. Schedule a start and end time. Then people know if they will be late they won't be coming after everyone else has gone.

This would help you in sending out announcements-make it fun. Say come to the shower to find out how much the baby weighed, etc and turn that into a game?

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Salt Lake City on

I know that you have found out that throwing yourself a shower is not appropriate, but I think even having your husband suggest to a friend or neighbor to have one is also not a good idea. A shower needs to be someone's else's idea from the start. If you are thinking of this just for the gifts, that is kind of sad, if you just want people to see your baby and celebrate then an open house after the baby is born is OK, but please do not expect a "large group of people" to bring gifts.



answers from Denver on

We didn't have a baby shower for my second child, but a friend of mine threw a Sip and See. It was a nice way for friends and family to celebrate and meet the new baby. I asked for no gifts on the invite. (however, some people did bring gifts) She made wine bottle labels with the new baby's picture on them and made some lasagna and salad. We also had a cake. My sister just had her third baby, like you almost 7 years later and I we are going to have one for her. All of her kids arrived 1month to 2 months early so she missed out on the baby shower experience.



answers from Denver on

Maybe you could call it a baby blessing or something along those lines, instead of a baby shower? I think it's sad that no one wants to throw you a shower and I see nothing wrong with having a gathering to bless the new baby. I don't have many suggestions for you for the rest of the stuff, except do what YOU like. Don't play games that you don't like. Don't serve food that you don't like (or can't afford). Just make it casual and fun :)



answers from San Francisco on

Yeah, no shower throwing for yourself and even gently asking someone to host one is not appropriate least, in my opinion. I really feel this would put someone on the spot...such an uncomfortable position.
I personally didn't want a shower for my second child, and won't be having one for the third child I'm pregnant with. I don't like people feeling obligated that they have to buy me a gift. Many friends/family members will buy you something anyway once your baby arrives. They might even ask you what you need. For my family, there are other ways that we celebrate the arrival of a new baby, besides just a 2 hour (or so) shower.
I think it's a great idea to save your money and use it to buy some new baby necessities. I really never felt like I need much and was happy without needing many of the latest baby gadgets to clutter up my house.



answers from New York on

I haven't been to many baby showers myself recently and yes things have changed, but here's my opionion...

Unless someone else hosts a shower, I think you should wait until after the baby is born, and have a come meet the baby party. This would work very well as an open house event.

While every child is a blessing and deserves to be celebrated, I'm not a fan of baby showers for 2nd and 3rd babies.

Open house - I've never been to an open house shower. I suppose it could work, but think it would be much more difficult.

Food - If someone is taking time out of their busy schedule to come to your event, and the time and money to purchase you a gift, I think you could give them something much more than cake and a few munchies. You certainly don't need to offer a meal, but a selection of finger foods would be appropriate.

Games - depends on the guests, but I think it's always fun to have one or two silly games.




answers from Pocatello on

Although I see no reason why a second, third, fourth, or any subsequent baby should not merit a baby shower, it does seem tacky to throw it for yourself. Baby showers or wedding showers are thrown by friends or family of the person being honored (the mother, or in the case of weddeing showers, the bride). I have heard of an alternative idea that may be better suited for you, after the baby is born you can host a "Sip and See" where guests can come and sip (tea, punch, whatever) and see the baby! You can serve light refreshments, no games are nessesary, and it is best done as an open house. It is a good time for gifts to be given as well. Congratulations on your new baby and best of luck!



answers from New York on

Very tacky to throw yourself a shower. I would not do it.

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