Baby Refusing Formula at Daycare...

Updated on September 16, 2008
L.P. asks from South Plainfield, NJ
11 answers

I am still breastfeeding my 10.5 month old daughter so I havn't given her a bottle in many months... I work 3 days a week and she is in daycare. She eats breakfast (cereal with fruit) and lunch (yogurt) there, and they offer her a bottle in between, and also one in the afternoon.. She gets some pumped milk, and the rest formula to suppliment (I've never gotten much pumping). She used to take about 4 oz each time, until she started eating two meals there its only been about 2-3, and sometimes the 4. Now the past week or so she's been playing w/ the bottle and shoving the nipple down into it, and not really drinking anything. I tried sending sippy's in.. but she isn't so good w/ them yet.. sometimes she does ok... the last two days she wouldn't drink from them (I've tried nuby's, avent, a gerber one, and the disposable ones) I always give her a sippy cup with her meals w/ formula or water just to give her practice but she dosn't take much - just a few messy sips. The days she has daycare she nurses in the morning, after work, and at bedtime. She just started sleeping all night, but sometimes still gets up once a night to nurse. The days I'm off I usually breastfeed her about every three hours (about 5 times/day) in addition to her 3 meals.
I'm not really stressed out about this b/c she is still breastfeeding fine, and she is great with eating food... To me it seems like she just dosn't want it for some reason.. I was just wondering if anyone has any suggestions as to what I can try....
Thanks alot!
**thanks for all of your comments so far.. just wanted to add/clear up... She's been in daycare since she was 3 months old, and has always taken bottles of either bm or formula without problems.. this is all of a sudden that she is refusing them and only taking an ounce or two for the day while she is there...

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A.P.

answers from New York on

Please don't listen when someone tells you that you should STOP breastfeeding by 15 months!!! Even the AAP says it should continue for as long as mother and baby are happy with it. If you have a pediatrician who tells you to stop, either educate him/her, or find a new doctor. Also, there's no rule that says you need to cut out night feedings. If you read Dr. Sears, he says that, many times, babies who are away from mom during the day will try to make up for the time at the breast (physically, emotionally, nutritionally) by nursing during the night. That it's not uncommon for babies to start night nursing when mom returns to work. So if you don't mind nursing her at night, keep it up! I'm sorry I don't have any suggestions for you as to how you can get her to take formula. I've heard some babies just won't take it, especially if they've been breastfeeding exclusively for a long time. My niece would not even take pumped breastmilk while at daycare, because she was used to nursing directly. I'm no expert, but I would think, at her age, if she won't drink formula, she'll be fine as long as you allow her to nurse before and after daycare and she's getting her solids. It's a long time for her to go without a drink, but my sister's kids all did it (and were only about 7 months old at the time), because they were used to mom only, but they adjusted. If they are thirsty enough, they'll drink.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.T.

answers from New York on

Hi L.,

I will say that the previous poster's advice about stopping breastfeeding by 15 months has no medical basis. There is no need to do that. The AAP recommends breastfeeding til at least 1 year, the WHO til at least 2 years. The 15 months is some magic number a doctor made up based on their own bias or what they did with their kid. There's no benefit to stopping by that time. There's also no need to wean to a bottle at that age, when you wean at over a year, you'd typically replace the breastfeedings with a cup.
Your daughter is getting close to the age of a year when the primary source of nutrition is food and not milk. It sounds like she is down less than 8 ounces of milk during the day, just a few days a week, which at 10.5 months isn't a huge big deal especially if she's nursing lots at home. At this age, if she was strictly breastfed or strictly bottle fed, she would likely be dropping a breast or bottle feeding somewhere during the day so I really think that you have nothing to be worried over!

1 mom found this helpful

M.H.

answers from New York on

Hi L.,

I have two a 6 yr old a and a 15 month old. I would like to start by saying I think you are doing a great job, breastfeeding is not as easy as one may think I breastfed my 15 month old until just before he turn 1. My doctor told me I could start regular milk at 11 months I would ask your doctor. He did just fine and the weening was great if thats how spell it LOL. In any event, I would ask if you could start the baby juices and water. Your baby sounds like a healthy little girl and plenty of milk. :) Good Luck! :)

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T.W.

answers from Buffalo on

She sounds normal to me! Many babies when away from their mothers will not take any bottles, whether it be expressed milk or formula. They will boycott and hold out for Mom, then try to make it up in extra nursings when they can. Its pretty common! So if she's well hydrated (diaper output is good), gaining, and reaching her milestones, I wouldnt worry and just let her lead in deciding what she wants and when. She seems to be pretty harmonious about it!

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L.S.

answers from New York on

Hi L.,

My daugther is almost 13 months. I just took her yesterday to the doctor for her 12 month check-up her are some suggestions that might help you. 1. By 15 months you should stop breast feeding and giving a bottle.
2. At 12 months you should go down to 3 milks per day. Theirr primary food should be table food.
3. Give up middle night feedings.

I have only breast fed my daugther too at 11 months I started transitioning her to whole milk but I still feed her BM morning and night (bedtime). She did fine with the switch. You should try the whole milk instead of formula and stop the middle of the night feeding. If you give whole milk at day care do the came when you are home.

Hope that helps.

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N.S.

answers from New York on

My son started doing this soon after he started daycare also. (Around 7 months) He just didn't want the bottle anymore when he was there. But as soon as I show up, he immediately gives the sign for bottle and wants to have one right away. Basically, I think he associates it with me and Dad and comfort. It took him a while to get the hang of the sippy cup but now he's a pro. Just let her practice with sippy and keep breastfeeding and you're good to go. Daycare seems to me a place where my son tests out a lot of his new skills first and they are pretty encouraging of him doing things for himself.

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J.M.

answers from New York on

i completely understood your original post:)

i wouldnt stress, at her age, and with the food, im sure she just doesnt like it, whether she doesnt like bottles or the taste. i know people use sippys alot but i never found my first daughter drank as much as she did from a bottle. i would have them keep offering it, as it may be one of those food strikes but i would think since you have been on the schedule so long, your body may just give her more on your after work feeding. when you are home, each feeding my be 6 ounces(hypothetical), but when you pick her up, since you didnt feed her during, she may be getting more at the feeding after work, kwim. even if you do pump in the day, its not the same.

as long as she is nursing on your off days, she will be fine. one thing to experiment is to give her just breastmilk, even if you only can pump a little, maybe she would drink the small amount if it wasnt mixed. at least it can help you figure out if its just a matter of taste.

i also applaud you for doing such a great job managing breastfeeding and working. you sound like you are both on a great schedule and going about the whole thing perfectly- not stressing but just wondering, i love it. i do feel the need to address the incorrect information that someone gave however. i dont know who her doctor is but i would highly suggest finding a new one. there is nothing anywhere to say 15 months is the magic time to quit. i feel this doctor is either not up to date at all on current recommendations, or is the type of doctor that thinks he knows better than anyone else no matter what everyone else says, or is antibreastfeeding. no matter the reason, horrible advice and i hope the mother who posted researches more(and brings the info back to the doctor to call him on it) again to reinterate, the aap recommends AT LEAST 1 YEAR, and the world health organization(WHO) recommends 2 YEARS. all agree there is no reason to think the scientifically proven benefits would not contiue if breastfeeding longer than one or 2 years. the overall agreement is to do it as long as both mother and baby would like but at least the 1 or 2 mark depending which group(so if you want to stop at 1 year, thats perfectly fine, but dont think you have to). its such a shame in this day where we know all the benefits, that the doctors who are supposed to be the most knowledgable give us their personal opinion versus medical advice.

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L.P.

answers from New York on

I have raised 7 babies, 3 born of my own body and nursed, the others bottle fed. I never gave a bottle after 1 year of age, and always started cups by 6 months. Go right to cups, or you will have a struggle to get her off of the bottle. Keep nursing when you are with her. She is getting enough that way, combined with her "food". She may pick up the cup at daycare, but I wouldn't put formula in it. I would give her water, or whole milk. Has she had yogurt yet? My kids loved yogurt at that age, and it gives protein and calcium if you feel that she doesn't get the milk during the day.
Keep up the good work and congratulations on giving your baby the best gift you can give her.
L.

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E.Y.

answers from New York on

My daughter is 10.5 mos old too, has never once taken a bottle of formula, and has been breastfed or has bottles/cups of expressed milk. She started going to daycare at 4 mos, and she pretty much completely refused to have anything to do with bottles for about 2-3 mos when she first started. She would only drink about 1 oz at a feeding and was a total wreck for months when I first went back to work (she made up for the feedings at night!). We started letting her practice with sippy cups at 5.5 mos old, because we learned that it is common for breastfed babies to refuse bottles. We started by just letting her practice with some water, and yes--it was messy. We tried many different brands. But, every weekend and at dinnertime we would always offer her water in a sippy cup. At most she would drink 0.5 - 1 ounce, so I didn't worry about her water intake affecting her appetite. Over time, we noticed that she was getting less and less messy with the sippies. Just starting last week, we completely retired her bottles, and now I send her to daycare with three sippy cups of expressed breastmilk a day (she'll drink 3-4 oz at a time). It just takes time for them to learn to use sippy cups proficiently. By the way, the brand she uses now at daycare (Born Free trainer cups) is not the brands that we practiced with most often (Playtex and First Years disposable)...go figure! So, periodically try other brands until you find she is good at one.
Also, formula tastes VERY different from breastmilk, according to our pediatrician. So, it is very common for breastfed babies to not like the taste of formula. One time when I had to stop breastfeeding for a few days to take some antibiotics, our pediatrician was worried that I would run out of our freezer supply of breastmilk...so he recommended that we try to mix 1/4 formula to 3/4 breastmilk just to introduce the taste...and work your way to 1/2 and 1/2...in order to stretch out the breastmilk...before getting to 100% formula in a bottle. (Turns out our daughter is allergic to standard formula and dairy and threw up the first ounce of formula we ever tried to give her...but that is another story! Fortunately we had enough breastmilk in the freezer to last us through that period!) I also heard that breastfed babies, if they accept formula, tend to prefer the kind made from powder rather than the ready-to-drink formula. Also, if your daycare is willing, prepare her milk (breast or formula or mixed) in 1.5 - 2 ounces portions, so there is little waste of your breastmilk in case she refuses it. At our daycare, if my daughter does not finish her milk, I have instructed that her teachers not dump the leftovers but return it to the fridge. They won't serve it again, but I will take it home and pour it in her dinner in order to not waste the liquid gold!
In any case, it seems your daughter is doing just fine with the little bit of reduced breastmilk at daycare...so it doesn't seem worthwhile to make a big fuss about it. One extra nursing session with you when you pick her up from daycare would make up for it. (I nurse about every 2 hours from the time I pick her up until 2 hours after she goes to bed, because I know she wants to make up some milk and also the bonding time spent with me.) I would bet that your daughter will improve her sippy cups skills before you know it!

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A.S.

answers from New York on

When my son was 7 months old and started share care with an 8 month old, both boys decided they were too big for mommy milk from bottle, cup, anything. It was like the first big lurch toward independence. They would drink water and eat all their food and nurse when Mom was around. As long as she is getting enough food and you are nursing her when you are together, I wouldn't worry about it!

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D.S.

answers from New York on

Dear L.,

I think you should try mixing part formula with part breastmilk. It may not be the taste it may just be the bottle. I think it is great that all of the women that responded breastfeed, however if you know that you are going to return to work I do not understand why a mom would not try to get their child to take a bottle before they put them in daycare. As a daycare owner, and a women who has cared for infants for many years there is nothing worse or more painful to watch than a hungry baby. I have never understood how a mom can never give formula or a bottle to their infant and think that miraculously they will drink at daycare. It is heartwrenching for us to watch these babies struggle to nurse because they know nothing else and then remain hungry the entire day until their mom returns. My advice to breastfeeding moms if you are planning to go back to work expose your child from the beginning to bottles and alternate with formula this way the babies do not struggle when put into daycare. It will make for a much easier transition for baby, and the daycare provider will not feel so helpless.

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