Baby Book Blues and Feeling Guilty

Ya know I never thought they were that big a deal either. Till we started doing some pretty serious assessments of my youngest sons issues. THEN that information became REALLY important.

Like when he first sat up on his own, how he wasn't much of a cuddler after a certain point, WHEN his sleep patterns began to change, etc. ALL that stuff became VERY important information and without it being written down I never would have remembered, I was so busy with 3 kids and a stressed out hubby who didn't help AT ALL.

I didn't chronicle EVERYTHING but made monthly notes (his had monthly up till 2, then every 6 months till 5) of stuff like sleep, cuddle time, when naps stopped and his energy level afterwards, the fact that by 2 he could literally kick my butt (and keep up with his dad) on video games that most kids can't master till 7 or 8 (or older). I didn't do it every day and I certainly didn't detail every single little bump, bruise, cut, cold, etc etc ... I'd have filled the library of congress if I did that LOL

More power to people who do baby books. They are super cool. Have I ever done one? Nope. I have three amazing kids and lots of fun photos and memories, but there is no "certain proper way" to remember stuff. Don't feel bad!
I agree with LeeLee, there are just a million ways that gifts can go wrong when they give the recipient "work to do". As a totally overextended mom-like all of us-I hate when people give me "projects" to do. They always mean well, but I always get that sinking feeling of stress when I get one, and then I try to pretend I'll do it, and then I finally just let it go. I never give gifts like that for that very reason. I figure people have their own ideas about how to spend their creative time.
And I'm stealing that yearly photo book idea!

No idea what kind of responses you'll get, but if not having a "Baby Book" for a child makes me a bad mommy, then I am bad times 3! I am so busy with so much else that I just don't have the time. I love scrapbooking which the piles and piles of saved stuff are a testament to, but I am no good at finding the time.

I have started a "box" for each child and saved a few items - one or two baby outfits, the cards from their first year (birth, baptism, Halloween, etc.), tickets from trips we have taken, a photo or two here and there from something special and these are getting full already. I am hoping that maybe one day we could make a book together of all the stuff I have saved. Either that or I need to retire early!! LOL.

My hopes are to create good memories for each. I worry less about the physical stuff.

I'd say move on and ditch the drama.
~C.

My mom is that way. She swears that I HAVE to save everything. Which I haven't. She literally just gave me a book of greeting cards that she had saved. Every single birthday card that was sent to me in my early years - in a scrap book. REALLY????

I was better about it with my son (my first), and did a decent job of writing things down - first steps, sitting up, etc... But NOTHING after year 1.

My daughter, I don't think I even chronicled her first steps.

I'm just not a detailed person like that, and I'm not into tracking all of it.

There will come a time where I'll wish that I did. I know that. But for now, I'm too busy working full time and chasing my two around in the little spare time that I do have, to sit down and write things out.

Meh...
I had good intentions.... but really... I don't even HAVE a baby book. I was the third baby, and I don't have one at ALL. I turned out okay, ya know?
My husband has one, with a few things written in it. no pictures. He couldn't care less about it.

I bought one for my son (firstborn) and wrote some of the big milestone events in there... I was really good at recording his growth for the first 6 months, etc. But after that... welll..... life sort of gets busy, ya know? That was back when the scrapbooking craze was getting ginned up (the real scrapbooking---with scrapbook parties and people selling all the accessories). It took me about 2 years to find the time to get his first 6 months chronicled in that scrapbook. VERY nicely done, btw.
That's as far as I got.
Our daughter was born a few months later, and I HAVE a book for her (I think) but there is practically NOTHING in it. I was just busy being their mom, not writing things down like a scientist. Sure it would be nice to have some of that stuff now (they are 10 and 13 years old)... and it would be nice to have to give them later (like when they have their first babies)... but in the big scheme of things----WHO CARES?

Do I feel guilt about it sometimes? Sure. But not THAT much guilt.
Your sister meant well when she bought the books, but that is far as she should be involved in it. The reality (of those good intentions, that even your mother had) is that what they GAVE you was a JOB to do. Right?
Don't worry.
Just don't. Your kids will be fine without every detail of their earliest poops being recorded in a pretty book.
And no you aren't lazy. You just are probably more focused on the real world, and not the fantasy world of having "the perfect babybook"... you are giving your kids an actual childhood, and not just a book about one. right?

I bought this really great leather Precious Moments (I think) scrap book pre-baby. A couple of years after baby arrived, I realized I have absolutely no desire or time to scrap book. So I sold it on Ebay :)

What I do instead is make yearly family album photo books on Shutterfly. Our daughter gets one each year on her birthday (so they chronicle our an her life from birthday to birthday). I even take photos of her greatest artworks of the year and she has a few pages of those in there. This works for me and is do-able. Actually our extended family really gets a kick out of them, too. I bring the new one out at each of her birthday parties and they enjoy looking through it while the party is going on.

Your sis needs to realize that not every gift works out for the recipient. Especially those that require the recipient to actually expend time to do it. If you'd requested it and then never used it, I could see how she might be a bit miffed. But you didn't.

im sure youv taken lots of pictures tho right.. who says they need to be in scrapbook as long as you have them

I think baby books are great in theory and nice for kids to look back at when they are adults, but they aren't always practical for moms to fill out. I used to tease my mom b/c my baby book was virtually blank; however, jump forward to the birth of my first child and lets just say her book is not complete. you can certainly thank your sister (probably did when she gave them to you) but you don't need to apologize for not filling out every little thing. it is nothing personal against her and if she wants to see it that way then there is nothing you can do. Every mom does her best to capture some memories of their little ones. I love the idea of doing a photo book at the end of each year. I think I might try that!

I WISH I'd written a lot of stuff down (mostly funny stuff that is so constant, how could I ever forget?, and then forgot)... but that ISN'T the stuff that's in baby books! At least not the ones I was given.

I must have been given 6 or 7 baby books, and there's no way on earth they're filled out.

I DO have a good 20,000 pictures from 0-5.... well... DID. My STBXH is holding them 'hostage' in the divorce, trying to use them as leverage. <rolls eyes>

I DID save my favorite outfits for a memory quilt (half of which my jerk face husband donated to goodwill to punish me at one point)). I plan on making it when I'm empty nesting in 10 years.

But no... no baby books here.

And if I had, they'd probably have been destroyed, anyway.

Maybe in 10 years, I'll have the time for it, and I'll dig through stuff.

I too have failed to keep up on by twin boys baby books. Partly because I was so overwhelmed and partly because the format/questions were never ones I really cared about. But one thing I did do, that helped elevate the guilt of the books, was to have a keepsake box for each (about the size of shoe box). It was my mother's idea to have one box for each child that I could just throw stuff in as I went along. The reality is that I just throw stuff in either boxes (regardless of whose it is) with the idea of sorting it all sometime down the road. It's not a perfect system but an easy one, especially when you need places to put stuff! Of course, the older they get, the more overwhelming the stuff but up until now, it's worked. I also love doing one shutterfly book a year with photos summing up our year. Although now I realize I only ordered one book (I have 2 kids) each year! Nice. Now the two can fight over who keeps what years done the road. Ah, it never ends. :)

Here is my thought and its not based on your relationship with your sister only my own experience.

My mom filled out baby books for my sister and brother but did not do one for me. I guess I used to make her feel quite guilty about it that one day for my 16th birthday she gave me one all filled out...that she filled in right before giving to me. Uh..ya like I actually believed she remembered all that info. Now my mom does have a great memory...but the sentimental value of her giving it to me at 16 was just NOT the same.

SO, the only way I think baby books are THAT important is whether you started one for one child...if so then yes I do believe each child should have one.

I made sure I did a baby book (0-12 months) for each of my daughters what I do beyond that...I'm not sure. And I can't tell you how many times I've already whipped them out for my girls to look at and they are only 6 and 4...so in our household I'd say they are pretty important.

I don't have a baby book for my daughter (now 10). I didn't even "try" to make one. We have lots of pictures, scattered about. Her older sister (17 years older) says she working on one for her. I didn't feel a twinge of guilt about this, even though she may have been trying to elicit that!

If you didn't ASK for the baby books, then it's a gift and not really a concern to her...it's not like you promised before she bought them to do it. That said, I was worried once that my friend would ask to see the one she gave me....but she didn't. (*whew!)
I WANT to be an amazing scrapbooker. I have grand ideas, but.....it takes so long! I have a big box of "stuff" I want to create with and make personal scrapbooks for each of my guys....but it is s l o w going. It's something that only comes up when I'm feeling real sentimental AND artistic/creative....and when those 2 "planets" align, I still need some time. I'm not going to beat myself up over it though. I figure right now we're trying to live life. There will be time to be alone and I'll be able to catch up once the boys are in school....or even when they move out, lol.
I didn't do a baby book. They asked stupid questions that I didn't care about, and didn't leave anywhere NEAR enough room for me to write about what I did care about.