S.Z.
Hi Sandy,
I think it's really smart that you're checking out what this parenting style looks like in practice and not just in theory. I personally try to avoid labels in parenting as I've found them to e a bit pollerizing and limiting. But if by attachment parenting one means being present (both physically & emotionally) for your child, responding to their needs and cries promptly, keeping my your child close to me day (babywearing much of the time) and night (C.-sleeping all the time), breastfeeding and self-weening, I suppose I'd fall into the AP camp. Additionally, baby & I practice elimination communication (EC), baby sign language, and we use cloth diapers (A lot of AP parents do these things too). But the funny thing is I did almost all of these things with my first daughter but did not think of myself as an AP parent! We didn't C.-sleep much (I slept close by) and we followed an adapted sleep/eat/play routine (yes, a Ezzo-style "schedule") and guess what, she thrived and was such a happy, content baby and a great sleeper to this day (She's almost six). My 15 month old "AP" baby is a delightful child who doesn't know to go to sleep without nursing her way there and has never learned how to self-soothe her way back to sleep when she wakes up at night. I enjoy sleeping with her and I the love the closeness and downtime we share (It's so busy with two girls during the day). My only concern is that when she wakes up she always needs to nurse back to sleep. I'm sure she'll be just fine but she may never be a teriffic-self-soothing sleeper (at least not for quite a while). Most of the families I know who consider themselves AP'ers sleep with their children for two, three years or longer. Of course you'll figure out what works for you but...here's something to think about...I think it's not the kindest thing to teach a child that the place to sleep is with you, that is where they are secure and warm it's all they know from birth and then to make them leave that place of comfort because the parent tires of the arrangement before the child is ready for the transition. Back when I was a nanny I saw this scenario happen more than once (It's pretty common) so I knew what I was in for when we started down this road and I'm just fine with it. The sleeping arrangement is only one aspect of the AP lifestyle but I think it's an important one to think about. I think it's a good idea to think about your vision for your family, say a few years from now, and decide the best way to parent in that direction. Maybe spend some time with some AP families asking questions yes, but also just observing and then borrowing the practices that you believe would benefit your family. It's quite an interesting journey working/ thinking through all of these decisions but it's good to be mindful in parenting as in life! I wish you all the best!
Lots of love, S.
