At What Age Did You Take Your Kids to See a Dentist and What Was Your Experience

Updated on January 28, 2011
L.S. asks from Princeton, TX
30 answers

My son will be 3 in April and I have been dreading taking him to a dentist! There isn't anything, that I know of, wrong with his teeth but his ped says they should start going at a year old. My son is pretty strong willed let me just add. When you try to force him to do something it turns into a horrible fighting tantrum. He is a pretty good kid, doesn't have many discipline problems. He acts pretty much like a normal 2 year old. His terrible twos have actually gotten alot better and he is calm for the most part. However, when it comes to things like looking in his mouth, ears, nose he will fight you! I feel like it would be a waste of my time to take him bc I know he will fight them off and we will just end up going home. The "showing the kid how fun the instrument is" trick doesn't work with him at all! Found that out with hair cuts. He doesn't go for bribery either, never has worked on him he'd rather go without. I would hate to take him and have a huge scene and then just have to leave. My first trip was when I was 3 and I bite the dentist and they refused to see me. Just to add: Im not a "push-over mom" or anything like that. I dont allow him to throw fits but I also try to steer clear of situations that I think would cause them. I just really don't know what to do in this situation. Thanks in advance for any advice!!

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So What Happened?

Thank you everyone for your advice! It's good to know that if I want I can wait a couple more months. After going to my second dentist as a child I loved going to the dentist especially when there were no cavities! It made me brush more so my next visit I would get another no cavaties sticker!! I let my son brush his own teeth and then I use a finger scrubber with kids paste and go behind him to brush. I will def check out some ped dentist and see which one I think will be best and then set up an appt!! Thank you to everyone for the great advice!! I did ask him today if he would want to see a tooth doctor (he was playing dr at the time) his response was no thanks, no teeth doctors!! hehe but he might really surprise me bc after a good brushing he has to show everyone his teeth with a big smile until they say Oh look how clean and shiney!! Then he gets excited!

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

Hello,
I love Dr. Tim in McKinney. We have gone to him since the girls were one and two years old. The thing that has helped the most is for me to sign them in and they each have their own hygienist that comes into the waiting room and greets them and takes their assigned child (which many times has been the same one each time). I also fill out a form on what flavor paste and such each will want and do I have any concerns at this time and would I like to see the doctor at the end; the hygienist takes it with her. The girls do SOOOOO much better than when I go back with them (that, my friend was a nightmare for me and them and the office). Without me, they take X-rays and clean their teeth. It is amazing how much bigger kiddos will ask without mommy there by their side. I used to be nervous but not any longer. After they are done, I speak with the doctor. Super nice staff and my kiddos actually look forward to going to the dentist!!!

Tim Brister
Texas Pediatric Dentistry
McKinney off Custer

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K.G.

answers from Fort Wayne on

I took my dd when she was 16mo she had a ton of teeth already, I found a pedi dent and he was wonderful. He just looked in her mouth while she sat on my lap. he did a quick brush with paste and floride (sp) and counted her teeth. The whole exam was less than 10 min.

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C.D.

answers from Washington DC on

My son was 2. I started a countdown to the big day by saying only x more days to go til you get to the dentist. He was pretty hyped up by the time he got to go. His dentist is great. For the 1st visit they showed him all their instruments, I was in the room, they counted his teeth and even pushed on them to get him used to the feel for next time of someone playing in his mouth. They give him a little present every time. He loves it now and they know him by name. Good luck.

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A.P.

answers from San Francisco on

Here is what worked for us: The no pressure approach

We started taking our daughters at age 2 to our regular dentist (not a kids place).They came with us to our appointments (we'd all go together so one parent could watch the kids while the the other was in the chair). They got used to hanging out and watching our teeth being cleaned. And at the end of each parent's appointment, one kid would get to lay on him/her to see the posters on the ceiling (no "alone in big chair" anxiety).

Each time the dentist would ask if he could look at their teeth. He never pressured them and told me not to push or cajole. He'd make faces with them, or blow up a glove and draw a face on it to make them laugh.

My older daughter let him look at her teeth on her second visit, the younger on her 1st visit (I talked it up a bit before hand, and then there was the pressure of keeping up with the big sister who went first).

I think they started getting their teeth cleaned around 3 or 3 1/2? By age 4, they were old pros.

I was tempted to insist my older daughter open her mouth, but it would have just been a disaster. I started to and the Dr. gave me a head shake & told me later that forcing the issue NEVER works.

So I second your gut - it's not being a wimpy Mom to try to introduce dentistry without drama - it will pay off in the long run. Dentist appointments are still a big non-issue for us at ages almost 9 and almost 6.

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L.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

I took my DS to the dentist for the first time last month - he's nearly 3 1/2 - and he did great. I had prepped him before going about sitting in the dentist chair, having to open his mouth and having the dentist check out his teeth. But while I was getting my x-rays done, they actually started cleaning his teeth with the little polishing instrument - cherry flavored paste and all. And he did fine. They did have a cartoon running on a laptop in the background which I'm SURE helped distract him. If his teeth are fine, I might wait a little longer even though the recommendation is to start early. But I think the best you can do is to prep him before he goes and then cross your fingers and hope for the best.

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K.F.

answers from Dallas on

I feel your pain with the strong willed child - my oldest is the same way. We did the exact same thing as Amy Mama Drama - I took both my girls with ME and the hygenist peaked in their mouth the first time and just did as much as was comfortable. By the 2nd or 3rd time my oldest was getting the full treatment. Along comes the 2nd a couple years later and she did great the very first time b/c of keeping up with big sister. . . . talk to your dentist and see if they will allow you to bring him. I know that SO many parents recommend a pediatric dentist, but I really like going to the family dentist where they know us all. Good luck!

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D.P.

answers from Seattle on

Def find a pediatric dentist. I took my almost 3-year-old to a pediatric dentist (dreading it, mind you, but trying not to show him that I was dreading it) and it went way better than I thought it would. The first visit was just to show him the cool things in the office - the chair that turns into a bed, the magic straw (water sucker-thingy), the water squirter, and the tickler (the spinning teeth-cleaing gadget). They let my son hold and try all the instruments himself, and he let them "tickle" his hand and even his lip. I was stunned. The dentist came in to introduce himself and asked if he could see inside kiddo's mouth to count his teeth. My son gave him a 1/2 second peep and that was it, but that was OK with the dentist on this first visit. They were more concerned with building trust than doing any dental work.

The second visit (last month, and kiddo turned three last fall) was scheduled to be a cleaning, but kiddo was not in the mood to even sit in the chair and watch the DVD that was playing above the chair. So it was more notes in the file for the dental hygenist and the dentist came in again to say hi and try to take a peek. Kiddo's teeth have plague building up, which makes me twitch, but the dentist is unconcerned at this point. Another visit scheduled for six months and I'm supposed to try to get him to attempt flossing the front few teeth with those little plastic single-use flossing gadgets. Good luck to me! The dentist suggested letting him play with on in the bathtub or practice licking it to get started.

Our ped dentist does offer sedation, if necessary, and a "blanket" - restraints. Parent's choice. Dentist said that if kiddo doesn't feel comfortable enough to have his teeth cleaned by the time he's, say, 5 - then we'll have to consider our options for getting those teeth cleaned. light sedative, if necessary - which I would chose in a heartbeat over tying him down.

Anyway - find a ped dentist and let them know your concerns. Your kid is certainly not the first one to create a scene in a doctors office. No worries!

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K.A.

answers from Little Rock on

I take my kids to a pediatric dentist. I first tried to take my oldest 3 to my dentist and he would not even let them look at his mouth. They gave me a business card for a Pediatric Dentist as I was leaving their office. I gave them a call and set up an appointment. I went into shock when he let them do what ever they wanted. Each cubicle had a tv set in the ceiling facing straight down. When we walked in, they had me help them lay him on the table. The put a pair of sunglasses and a set of headphones on him and ask him what his favorite cartoon was. After that he was totally zoned out and they cleaned his teeth with no problem. Since then I have taken my other 2 children to the same pediatric dentist with great results.

You might try finding a similar type one in your area. Try asking other moms in your area what dentist office they use for their children and see if anyone knows of one set up this way.

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L.M.

answers from Dover on

Well the dental hygenist that I see every six months told me that unless there is something wrong (any kind of problem) and as long as they will let you or dad brush then there is no need to go before 3-4 years of age. They typically wait until age 4 and then ease into it. I know that my actual dentist (who is very good) is now a grumpy old man so when I was ready to take my daughter, we took her to the pediatric dentist. I had two people recommend two different onces but since we know the hygentist in the one's office AND he is the one they send the problem kids to, I figured he could handle anything that my daughter could dish out.

We really talked it up that she was a big girl and could go to the dentist now. Her preschool did the same (other kids told their wonder dentist stories and she was excited to go). Just after my daughter's 4th birthday, we took her to the dentist. She played in the waiting room. They walked her back and talked to her to be sure she was quite comfortable, and then had her sit back w/ sunglasses on. Told her to open wide so they could clean her teeth and just look. They showed her what they were doing every step of the way. Then the dentist came in to look at everything and "count" her teeth...he did it using the alphabet. She got a prize and a toothbrush.

Start now talking about how great it is to go to the dentist to have them clean you teeth really well. Let him know about prizes and toothbrushes. If he doesn't already let you brush for him, work on that first. The key is comfort and letting him think it is a cool idea.

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K.S.

answers from Dallas on

First, my son is exactly like yours. I was absolutely dreading it!!! I took my son at 3 1/4 and he did AWESOME! I was so surprised. I printed out the little book on the website where you can add their name & read it to him for a week before & I think it helped. He loved hearing & seeing his name in the book. I just took him back for his second time (now almost 4) & he did even better than the first time. I was still shocked!!! We go to Dr. Tye at Frisco Dentistry for Kids & their amazing! Like me, you never know, he may surprise you!!! Good Luck

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A.S.

answers from Boca Raton on

I agree with Katie on the family dentist (that's what we do too).

We started out at 3 or 4 with a pediatric dentist but have switched to a family practice where they see all of us. We like that much better and I think they do a better job with the kids (much to my surprise).

Good luck.

R.D.

answers from Richmond on

I LOVE going to the dentist, so my kids definately fed off my enthusiasm. The girls were 2 and 3 when we first went for a cleaning, and then they each had a teeny tiny cavity (in the same tooth!) that they went back to have drilled and filled the following week. They did AWESOME!! They've recently gone again for another cleaning/check up, and we had absolutely no problems. Again, because I get excited, they get excited. Now my SON, darling boy that he is, had a fish hook go through his upper gum when he was 9 months old, so he went to the dentist very early to get that checked (he was fine) and they said that unless there are any other problems, they wouldn't have to see him again until he was around 2. HAVE FUN WITH IT, and your son will too :)

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D.S.

answers from Dallas on

I was worried about this too, and my dentist recommended a really good pediatric dentist. They are used to it there and will work with the child. Plus, they have lots of toys and games to distract them. The first few visits were a bit rough, but now (he's five) he's a pro at it and he loves going there!

We see Dr Jamison in Fort Worth. Let me know if you want his phone number, otherwise, just ask around. Like I said, they will be used to the nerves and stubbornness, and don't let your child pick up on the fact that you are uneasy about it (for whatever reason) as that will only make it worse.

Good luck!

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

My girls go to a pediatric dentist every 6 months and they love going. My oldest started at age 3 and my little one went earlier, due to a mouth injury. But, the first few times, the dentist just counted their teeth and that's it, just to get them used to being there and sitting in the chair. This past time now that my youngest was just turning 3 and was comfortable, she let the dentist clean her teeth. And she is a VERY stubborn girl! We always read about the dentist, they have play dentist, and we talk very positively about how fun it is to go there and how cool the dentist is. If you can, choose a pediatric dentist who has the experience with young children and the patience for them. Good luck!

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

My first was 2 when he went then the started recommending you go at 1 so that is when my youngest started going. Find a very good pediatric dentist in your area that will allow you to go in with your son. Ours is very patient my youngest had gone 5 times and this last visit was the first time he sat in the dental chair before that I sat knees to knees in regular chairs with the dentist bc he was scared of the chair laid hi head in her lap and she brushed his teeth not the assistant.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Call your insurance provider and ask for a refernce to a pediatric dentist. They are professionals who know how to deal with kids, ours plays with the kids while cleaning their teeth and we took J at 20 months and he sat still the whole time he got his teeth cleaned and flossed. A good pediatric dentist is worth their weight in gold.

Call the offices of the ones your provider gives you and ask questions.
If your child needs a filling does the doc do it int he office or under general anesthesia at a local hospital, mine does this and has priviledges at Children's, Baptist, and MidWest City hospitals. Does the doc us white material for fillings and caps or silver. If the doc is old he prob. will use silver but if he's younger he'll prob. use white. Kids can be cruel anyway, why give them more to tease a kid with silver teeth about. How often do they see kids, mine does teeth cleaning and general exams every 6 months plus 2 weeks. So, not exactly twice a year. How many times a year do they do X-rays, ours does once a year unless the see anything that would suggest an issue.

If you don't gel with the dentist you pick then check out another one, there are more than one out there. FInd one youel trust and like. I lucked out with my first pick. We drive 125 miles twice a year to OKC jsut to see this guy. He is awesome and worth the drive. We make alittle vacation out of the visits and make the appointments of Friday of Fall break and then stay the weekend, eating out at fun places and playing in the hotel pool for hours.

K went at 3 or 4 because her mom wouldn't hold her hand while they went down a steep set of metal stairs and she fell and broke off her front tooth. She had a white cap put on in the hospital in the operating room under general anesthesia plus a couple of cavities filled at the same time. She woke up and wanted to go out to eat...no trauma at all, no pain, nothing abnormal at all. J went at 20 months because it was big sis' next appointment and we took him in too.

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B.M.

answers from Abilene on

My daughter has dentures at 26, so we were all concerned about the dental health of my granddaughter, 5yo now. My dentist and hygenist both said to bring her with me on a couple of my regular cleaning appointments. They set her up with a stool right next to me where she could see what was going on and gave her a mask and glovees just like they wear. The hygenist even let her hold the mirror and "work" on my teeth with a couple of the instruments. When I was through, she had dgd get in the chair for her turn. We both got new toothbrushes and toothpaste. It was a very positive experince for her and she looks forward to her own appointments now.

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M.V.

answers from New York on

I started taking both of my kids to a pediatric dentist by the time they were a year old. Going to doctors and dentists is a fact of life, and the sooner they realize that, the easier it will be. Pediatric dentists are trained to deal with children. Believe me, they've seen all kinds of kids, from shy and nervous to out of control and defiant. Nothing your son does should faze them in the least. I wouldn't let my apprehension about how he will behave deter you from taking him. He may surprise you! Do not let your own negative experiences with a dentist influence your behavior or demeanor. Just be matter of fact and calm about the whole thing. Good Luck!

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

Both my sons' pedi said waiting to see the dentist until 4 was fine unless there was a problem with their teeth. However, brushing twice a day by an adult is a must. The last time I took my 6 year old to the dentist, I asked them what they thought was a good age and they agreed with my pedi that 4 was just fine(I have a 3 year old, too). They said that a child who is mature enough to have a positive first trip to the dentist is very important and that taking a child before the age of 3 was just very unnecessary unless there was a problem. You know your son better than anyone. Take him when you feel he is ready.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

I took my daughter, now four, to a ped dentist when she was a year and have been going every six months ever since. We have a fantastic peds dentist and have recommended the office to many friends. They make the visits fun, they make brushing fun. I grew up with a great dental experience so maybe that has something to do with my daughter's perspective. I make the visits seem like she's so grown up and so responsible: ) A good dentist office should make the experience fun, flexible, etc.

Hope his first experience is positive!

M.R.

answers from Rochester on

I took my oldest when he was 3 because I figured it was covered and worst case we would go home. My pediatrician does not suggest children go before 3 or 4 and when I checked with my dentist, he agreed. He said there is no point in bringing in a child whose teeth he won't even be able to look at.

My son did great. He was a little hesistant about some of the tools, but they were awesome about talking to him and we had read the Berestain Bears go the the Dentist (I'm probably butchering the title and spelling) and he already knew what a dentist does. I LOVE going to the dentist and always have so wanted him to have a positive experience. It is in the same building as his pediatrician and the next time we went to the doctor he asked if he was going to get to go to the dentist. :)

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K.C.

answers from Dallas on

I took my son to the pedi dentist at 1 year old. They said he was the most well behaved little guy the had ever had. He had such a great experience too that I know he will be great next time we go. He even let them floss his little teeth...he is a very hyper kid and I know your son will do just fine. Just explain to him ahead of time that you are going to see the tooth doctor and make it sound fun and exciting and that if he is good he will get a sticker...I don't know what he is into but make it great and I would only take him to a pedi dentist that specialized in little ones. Stop Worrying he will be fine.

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S.W.

answers from Dallas on

I've taken both of my boys since they were a year old, just to get used to the tooth doctor, getting used to someone opening their mouth, touching inside their mouth, leaving their mouth open for a little bit of time, feeling certain utinsels inside the mouth. At 3, they both had checkups. Again, very simple, but this time with X-rays. My youngest, 3, did wonderful with the X-rays and examination. My now 5YO (just this morning, as a matter of fact) just had two cavities filled and he did EXCELLENT! Never a wimper or cry or feeling of anxiety. I was right outside the room with a window where I could see him, but he couldn't see me as he was busy watching Kung Fu Panda (kids get to pick their own movies to watch while procedures are being done). It took about 30 min. It helps to have a wonderful pediatric dentist and staff and a kid-friendly atmosphere in the waiting room and even where the chairs are.

Our office is great! Dr. Kelli is a mom and dentist and she's easy to talk to and get answers from if you have any questions or concerns. I don't know where Princeton is, but if it's close to Frisco, TX, I attached the link to our dentist for you.

Good Luck...3's a good age. It's never too late to start!

http://www.drkelli.com/

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S.M.

answers from Indianapolis on

I took my son for the first time to a pediatric dentist at 3 1/2. The whole appointment was very low pressure (let's count all your teeth, do you want to see what this feels like?, watch the little squirter). They had sunglasses for him and a tv with Nemo on; he got a little toy at the end. All in all it was a very positive experience and my son is VERY strong willed. I'd say it is time to give it a try. Pediatric dentists are just that - they know how to work with kids. Good Luck!!

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

My son had his first visit at his Pediatric Dentist at 18 months. I think it's important they see a pediatric dentist as their office is geared toward kids and they're used to how children react (they know how to distract / engage them).

I would only caution you that your negative "dreading" will affect how they react. Be sure you only speak of visiting the dentist in a positive and encouraging manner. Ex: Next week you are soooo lucky because you get to go see. Dr.......Yeah!!!"

Good luck!

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K.O.

answers from Atlanta on

I have started around 2.5. I go to a pediatric dentist, and it was easy and tantrum free. They would lie on the chair/table and watcht he movie on the TV that was mounted to the ceiling and let the dentist do her thing. Now, my oldest for some reason would get progressively worse at each visit. AT 4.5 it took 4 of us to hold him down for a teeth cleaning. At his 5 year check up, he "graduated" to the sound proof room so he wouldn't scare other kids. But then he acted like he did on his first visit - perfectly relaxed, no screaming.

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M.S.

answers from Dallas on

I work in a family dental office. The American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry recommends kids see a dentist before their first birthday. A pedodontist's office is fully set up and able to treat kids this young, and for at least the first few visits he would be much better off in a pedodontist office.

Don't make a big deal out of it. Kids feed of the parents anxiety and that's when they act up. The staff knows exactly what to do and say to make it a great experience for him. Let them handle everything if you think he'll be a problem. And DONT take him to the dentist with you. Even with a routine cleaning he would see some blood, which would scare him. Besides, it is VERY unsafe for him and you, and the staff doesn't have time to watch him for you while you get your treatment done. Most of the time we ask patients to reschedule if they bring small children with them without someone to look after them.

You can get lots of info at the Academy of pediatric dentistry's website www.aadp.org

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Take him to YOUR next appointment and have him come in and watch you. Then find a reputable pediatric dentist near you & take him there.

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J.F.

answers from Nashville on

Make sure you have a good dentist who is patient with kids. I started taking my son when he was 2 or so. He did really well. He let the hygenist clean his teeth but the dentist told me that he won't push kids and if they don't want to do anything they will just count the teeth or whatever the child will allow. The point is to make it a good experience so he is willing to go back again. Sometimes I lay on the chair and my son lays on top on me and that is how he gets his teeth cleaned. Sometimes he is willing to sit in the chair by himself. It might help to take your son when you get your teeth cleaned so he can see what happens. I took my son with my older niece and that made him very interested in getting his own teeth cleaned. With my second son, I took him to his brother's appointment and now the next time we go, my younger son will also have his teeth cleaned (or counted depending on how it goes).

G.T.

answers from Modesto on

My boys were about 4 when they had their first check up. I waited until they were mature enough to rationalize someone looking in their mouth and such. Read a few books from the library so they were informed and not scared. Never complain about the dentist or how "it hurts" as this will make them too paranoid to go and then you have to deal with the screamer kid in the chair that doesnt really get all that great of care because they cant stand to see that kid walk in the door. There is no reason for a child to fear the dentist if you prepare properly for the visit. If his teeth and gums look fine to you and you are making sure he brushes every morning and night, my bet is that his baby teeth are just fine. It's good to get that "coating" on their molars when they are about 5 or 6 just to preserve them until their perms come in since that doesnt happen for a few years after.

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