My husband and I are members in a Southern Baptist Church. My husband recently became a youth leader and as his wife, who is his helper and supporter for this ministry, I am seeking advice on his behalf. The youth in our church meet twice a week, Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings for Sunday School. Wednesday nights seem to be flowing better than Sundays, however. The youth's ages are 6th grade to 12th grade and he just seems to struggle so much on Sunday mornings with them. They are unmotivated, seemingly unchallenged, bored to death. Two of the youth have been so bold to say they are bored. My husband is very prayerful, looking for inspiriation in God's Word, seeking out other youth leaders who seem to all have the same problem with their youth on Sunday mornings. They only meet for 1 hour so I am trying to help my husband in this area as best as I can and wonder if there are other youth leaders in a Christian church who may have struggled in this area, do you have any advice? Any suggestions to help these youth be more excited to be in church. I realize that we can do NOTHING on our own, that it is the power of the Holy Spirit to get the hearts and minds of these kids to open...but God has placed my husband in this leadership role and he is in need of some direction, some ideas to present to his group, activities perhaps, to get them challenged and motivated. Any wisdom you can share will be appreciated. Thank you.
**On Wednesday nights, our church has a free dinner for everyone and then after dinner everyone, adults, youth, and younger children branch off to their designated area for worship/prayer/bible study. On Sundays, our church DOES provide coffee, donuts, and juice for everyone attending Sunday school. Food, in my opinion should not be the motivator for coming to church. We realize that some, but not all of the children/youth, are coming to church because their parents "make" them. And like I said, Wednesdays are easier....there is dinner, dessert, a video, lesson, worhsip music, and a game IF there is time. On Sundays, it is much more structured with a lesson. My husband has asked the youth what they want and he says they look at him with a blank stare and say, "I don't know." The problem is that our youth group on Sunday is very small. There are less than 10 kids....2 of them in 6th grade, none in 7th, 1 in 8th grade, the rest in 10th grade. On Wednesday nights however, the group is larger....most of them in grades 6-8 and it is important to note that we live in a small community, our church is very small. He has asked the youth to give him ideas but all they can come up with is that what he's doing isn't working. This isn't an uncommon problem. The previous youth leader led them for 6 years. She is still a member within our church. She got burned out....she told my husband she encountered the same thing....it's frustrating.
The world is changing, quickly I might add.
Keeping the youth in touch with the Lord is only going to get harder (that's biblical of the times).
Wednesday nights are better than Sunday mornings you say? That might be a clue.
If you can get more youth to come in and listen on a week night rather than on a Sunday you should be brave enough to give that a whirl.
I'd try music. Kids really like music. And it needs to be contemporary. Get some music by Christian bands and listen to the words.
Here's one: I Can Hardly Imagine by MercyMe
http://artists.letssingit.com/mercyme-lyrics-i-can-only-i...
Casting Crowns is a good band. I'm trying to remember another one that I like, but am not sure I'm getting the name of the group right, but I think it's Newsboys. (ETA - yes, it IS Newsboys. I love their GO album. The song "In Wonder" will bring tears to your eyes. I also like the song "Something Beautiful".)
Anyway, there needs to be a blend of fun and the gospel. They aren't interested in just church. However, it shouldn't just be about food.
Find out if there is a song out there about the lesson your husband wants to teach. Use the song somehow. That might be a tall order and you certainly won't find one for every lesson. But try.
You have to find a way to connect with them. They may not know what would interst them either, so your just going to have to try a few things.
I once led a Bible study where I started each session with a fun, off the wall question. What is your favorite tv show? If you could visit any city in the world, which one would you want to visit and why? Really just anything to get them talking to you. Also, make sure they know they can ask any question. Anything. They need to know that nothing is off limits. If they are hesitant to ask a question you could introduce a question box. They can write any question on a piece of paper and place it in the box anonymously and it will be answered.
You also need to have some fun together. Put together a Bible trivia game - Jeopardy style to quotes Wheel of Fortune style. One of my friends played the Newlywed Game with her Confirmation class. She had Adam and Even, Abraham and Sarah, Noah and Mrs Noah (because as far as we know Noah's wife is never mentioned by name). The students got really creative. Noah taled about taking his wife on a cruise for their honeymoon. Mrs. Noah had an interesting reaction to that, but I can't remember what it was.
You have to find ways to have fun with them. Once you really grab their attention they will open up.
Yes I have dealt with similar issues.
The solution? Honestly - FREE BAGELS. Coffee, juice, etc.
They are not "bad kids", as you see from their involvement on Wednesday evenings. But on weekend mornings, they are sleepy teenagers (and pre-teens).
You just need to "hook them in" by tapping into their most basic human/teen needs when their bodies are so tired.
Do lots of singing, some get-to-know-each-other games, and free bagels. In-between the regular Sunday School lesson for the day.
ETA: I am ordained as an Elder in the Presbyterian Church. Please know that I am not joking around with my "bagels" comment. You need to open your heart and your mind to the realization that these youth need to come together for FELLOWSHIP as well as for learning. I'm not talking about passing by the communal doughnut table that the 3-year-olds go to. It's not about "free food". It's about breaking bread together. And it is only through the relaxed conversations that happen over - for example - a burned bagel or a funny get-to-know-you game that you will learn what is truly in the hearts and minds of these kids. And you will then be able to tailor your Bible lessons to be most meaningful to them. Don't push them away by closing yourself off to change.
Also ETA: As a teen, I loved my church youth group!!
You're asking God for guidance, which is great. But have you asked the kids? Our youth group is very enthusiastic and involved, largely because they run their meetings - they do tons of service projects, play games, put on dinners for family and for the church, and really enjoy each others' company. I've never heard or seen them be bored.
You may completely disagree, but have you considered offering them more adult fare? These are the ages that kids no longer want to be treated like kids. They want to be treated in a more mature manner, and that includes instruction for them. Teach them the faith. Don't sugar coat. And don't make it "about them" as counter-intuitive as that may sound. But the reality is, the world ISN'T "about them."
That is the world they must function in. So give them the knowledge they need to live out their faith. Not just a bunch of entertainment to keep them "happy" for an hour on Sunday morning.
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The Sunday School class my kids are in has 3 kids. Them (grades 7 and 10) and one other 10th grader. Smaller can be a good thing. Use it to your advantage to let them open up and discuss. It doesn't have to be "structured" so much as long as you are teaching them. My kids' class sits on sofas and they talk about all kinds of things. Usually, it starts out discussing the gospel reading for the week...
Personally, I think part of the reason so many youth leave the church is that they are taught (from an early age) that the deep issues of theology are beyond them and that they are only "worthy" of the fluffy stuff for discussion. It might be subtle, but that is the message they take away many times. Rather than teaching them about morals, teach them the faith. Rather than teach them law, teach them the reality of sin and what the answer to it is. It isn't "trying harder to be good". It is Christ. And every time they fail (and they will, as every one of us does) the answer is always Christ. Not to try harder, not to do better deeds, not ____. It's confess and be forgiven in Christ.
They need to know it is ok to fail. It is ok to make mistakes. It is okay to do wrong.... not because it is "good', but because they are forgiven. Lots of preaching (and Sunday School lessons) are about bettering ourselves. In my opinion, it shouldn't be. It should be about the reality of what the Gospel means for us. Forgiveness. Teach that to the youth. They need to hear it. Regularly. Just like adults do.
Let the kids run the service basically. I'm sure there are those who are talented and could put together a worship band. Let them do it. Ask motivated kids to lead prayer and to organize service projects in your city. Instead of having them gather at the church every time, how about on Wednesdays they have activities to do together? Kids need down time because many of them are working hard at school and jobs during the week. Also you have a very wide age range. Think about separating junior high from high school.
At our church the youth are split into different groups based on age. Sixth graders don't have the same interests as seniors in high school. Perhaps breaking the kids into smaller groups by age and having other parents or college age students help you. Sunday mornings may be part of the problem-give them something to look forward to coming--donuts, coffees, burritos, etc. !
Talk to them about topics that are important to them and that they can relate to--show them the relevance of those topics in the Bible! Good luck!
Maybe they would respond to leaving the church and helping others, what a great experience that would be for them. Then discuss the experiences. Maybe they want to worship through music, I visited a tiny, poor church in Mexico that had a keyboard, drums and electric guitars, the teens loved singing and playing for worship!!
Maybe they would be fascinated by visiting other places of faith, temples, mosques, Friends Meeting Houses, and discussing their experiences the next Sunday. Have you tried reading a book and discussing it? Watching a movie about teens and discussing it?
Good luck
Talk to the kids about what they would do to make it better. You will need to put some parameters on it based on what your church expects or might not allow on a Sunday morning. (They may require Sunday morning to be more worshipful.) You need to meet kids where they are. Find ways to connect to what is going on in their lives away from church. If bullying is a concern for them, do a Bible study based on what the Bible says to do. Kids probably don't want to be talked at. They get that all week in school. Make it more fun with discussions or video series to mix things up a little.
Talk to parents about what they think would make it better. Our church had a big revival in our youth program when we had a youth director who came in and got parents involved. We have a very successful mentor program in our church where a small group of youth are matched up with an adult in the church. They meet as small groups to talk about what is going on in their lives. The more relationships that are built, the more kids will want to be involved.
Get the youth involved in service projects for the church and the community. Maybe they can write and perform dramatizations of Bible stories for younger kids or for the church as a whole. Maybe they can participate together in a 5K fund raising walk/run.
You will probably never get 100% buy in from all the kids. But if you can get a strong core group you will get more kids involved.
Has he talked to the kids? Beyond telling him they are bored, are they saying anything else? It's nice to get info and feedback from other adults, but what do the kids want, need? What would they find interesting? What might engage them? If he can think outside the box and connect the spiritual teaching with the kids on their level, perhaps they might engage more...
I read all of the answers, and you got some great ones!!! I am a youth team volunteer at a large church with a large amount of students. The leader they had for 27 years was amazing. He talked to the kids and gave them time to just hang out with each other and the youth leaders. He could relay truth to them in 20 minutes like no one I have seen, and then just let them hang out. I was first against this, but I have found that if you give them time to be themselves and get to know you, they are more likely to take in your truth. As adults we expect others to earn the right to tell us truth, and kids are just young adults! We need to earn the right (at least in their eyes) to tell them truth and them to listen to it. I believe that the more information you give them about yourself, past mistakes, where you learned, how you responded to your parents, and be real with them, the more they are apt to listen to you. If God is the one who put him there, they he must have a love for these kids and a special gift that he can share with them. Ask God what that is and share it with them!
First off you need to break Middle Schoolers & High Schoolers into 2 different groups.
Second try not to make it so structured - these kids already have full school schedules and quite honestly my kids get burnt out during the week and also have work on the weekends. You can still have lessons but do it relaxed with them leading the group. Why not have discussions on current events and how they relate to the Bible.
