Anyone Have Kids of Driving Age?

Updated on June 05, 2012
K.U. asks from Reston, VA
11 answers

my oldest is 17 and then theres the second oldest 15....17 yr old has her dricing license, 15 yr old geets his permit in december...there have been ALOT of accidents with teens and young kids,it makes me extremely nervous when my kid wants to borrow the car. I am not worried about them necessarily but other drivers that dont respect no textn and driving, and all the dui's. anyone else, feel this nervous. like i pace the floor and can't wait for her to just get home again. and now with 2 wanting to be on the road i just dont know if i can get over this fear. i got 4 more kids to go through this as well and i am not looking forward to this milestone.

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Featured Answers

D.S.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi, K.:
My son received his driving license in the Army.
My daughter received her license when her sister
took her to DMV after she graduated High School.
Yes, I knew that teen agers are killed more in accidents than
illnesses.
I didn't worry. They didn't drive.

Good luck.
D.

More Answers

L.P.

answers from Tyler on

I understand how you feel, but please don't worry yourself sick over "what ifs"....you can't allow fear to rule your life. Accidents happen, worrying won't prevent that. Prepare her to know what to do in situations such as losing control of the car. I have a state trooper friend who will take young drivers out on country roads and practice regaining control of a car and not overcorrecting (we haven't done this, yet. We plan to). Discuss what to do if a minor fender occurs. Talk about how you have to drive slower and with more caution on slick roads. The better prepared the young driver is, the less you need to fret and worry.

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M.B.

answers from Austin on

Been there..... 4 times!

Does it get any easier? I don't know.... but at some point, we have to release our fear and worry, otherwise it negatively impacts our health, too.

Daughter was in a severe accident... dozed, caught the shoulder, and flipped her car. The car landed on its roof.... btw... she was 24 when this happened.... We've been extremely fortunate that none of the other kids have been in severe accidents.... daughter #3 was involved in several fender benders... but was at fault on only 1, fortunately.

She walked away with a broken collarbone and 4 stitches on one finger.

One thing we did was to severely restrict their driving for at least the first 6 months..... basically to and from school and school/church activities, or errands for M. and dad. No highway driving for the first 6 months, either.

Also, you can set up guidelines based on grades.... anything below a "B" on a report card or progress report, and no driving until the next report....... even if you DID bring it back up.

Turn this into a positive, and a way to train responsible young drivers.

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K.K.

answers from Dallas on

Not there yet but in about three years. I do feel for you. I am not so looking forward to that, although I am sure he is.

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L.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I worry every single time my son goes out the door. I always tell him him to be safe and make good decisions. I hope that what I have taught him about driving will stick. He is a really good kid but like you said there are other circumstances involved and other drivers out there. My second son is nearly 17 and waiting until he is 18 to get his license like his big brother did. My daughter is 14 and I know she will be chomping at the bit to get her permit at 15 1/2. Lord help me. Every time I hear sirens I do a mental count of where my kids are and say a prayer to God to watch over them. I will always worry, that is what parents do.

L.B.

answers from Biloxi on

My teen is 16 today - got his permit last week.
It will be awhile before he actually drives - partly because he has to learn - partly because he is scared witless at the thought of operating a vehicle. LOL

I read an article the other day (I forgot where) that stated the incident of accidents is greatly reduced if teens wait until they are 17 to drive.

But, we all got through it - the learning to drive thing. Teach them road safety, defensive driving and model good driving, etc. Have them sign up for driver's ed at school. Place rules on driving - to and from, times, passengers, etc.

It will be okay.

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J.S.

answers from Tampa on

Sorry, but this really doesn't go away anytime soon. My 2 oldest are almost 22 and almost 19, and I am still on edge whenever I know they are on the road. We have even been through the horrible call from each of them from the scene of the accident, luckily nothing too bad, but it still makes your heart stop and you can't get to them fast enough! All I can say is if you are a religious Mama... start saying your prayers. If not, put your trust in your children and yourself, becasue I am sure that they have learned some good life lessons and values from you. (no drinking and driving, no texting or talking on the cell while driving, etc) As parents, we can do only so much. It is one of the hardest things as a Mom that I have had todo so far. I am a self proclaimed "ocd control freak" and this is one of those times when I just can't have any of the control. I had to cut the cord and let go. :( If I thought for a second that either of my girls were not being safe, well, I would have taken away the driving priviledge, but I can't control what others on the road do. I did my best, along with their Dad to teach them how to drive defensively, and so far thank God we have been very lucky! I will be thinking about you! Good luck Mama!! <3

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

I know the traffic in Reston and in Northern Va in general and just having myself and my husband drive in it was nerve wracking.
We feel much better about it now that we've moved away.
When our son gets to be driving age in a few more years I know I'll still worry, but nothing like I would have if he was driving where you are.

K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

Been there. We have 2 down and driving and 5 more to go...(I have 5 kids and 2 nephews)!!

It is VERY stressful and I HATE it...but what are ya gonna do? Gotta let them grow up and driving is something they have to learn.

For what it's worth, our oldest will be 21 in October and I don't worry about him anywhere near as much anymore!!

~The only thing that made me stop thinking/worrying about all the 'what-if's' (for awhile anyway) was when we signed up for the car insurance! Are you kidding me with that? UGH!!!

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K.H.

answers from Norfolk on

It's a tough thing for you to go through. Have confidence in the way you have raised your kids. Also, if one or more of them seems immature or irresponsible, revoke their driving priveleges immediately. Unfortunately, there's nothing you can do about the other drivers on the road. My kids have been driving for years, and I still pray that they will be kept safe. For that matter, I have a father nearing the age of 80 who drives up and down the east coast by himself without blinking an eye. I think I'm more worried about him than I am the kids!

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

Of course I worry everytime my 17.5 yr old walks out the door and drives off in her car. It is normal for parents to worry when we pass off the keys to a car.

However, I don't pace and make myself sick with nerves. I trust that I have taught her well. I am proud that she has become a responsible young person who thrives on responsibility and independence.

It is a milestone that is tough for parents to swallow but we have to let go and let our children grow up, as hard as it is. Mine will head off to college in 2013 most likely a plane ticket away from here so I am gearing up for that now. I'd rather her learn as much as she can now and be proactive that be thrown into the unknown and be unprepared.

Hang in there.

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