Anyone Have a Child Diagnosed with ODD? How Is She or He Now?

Our son has ODD but it was milder than his other symptoms. We had the same psycho/educational testing and it was something we should have done years ago. As the behaviors steadily declined, he ended up going to a Wilderness Program and then to a Residential Treatment Center. He is much better now. These people are wizards at what they do. His meds are now straight and that is a large chunk of the challenge. It's only been 9 months since leaving for the Wilderness Program but he is at least 80% better. I would never have believed it. It was destroying our family and this was our only option but I'm so thankful that we made that decision. He is too. Hang in there-I KNOW how hard it is.

As I person who would most likely be considered ODD by today's standards, this is what I have to say on the matter:

"I'm not arguing, I'm simply stating why I am right."

I'd be interested to know how many great minds would be considered ODD. Or how about lawyers. I've yet to meet a lawyer that doesn't love to argue impulsively! it's a gut reaction to start with "no." And when I studied philosophy, it was a prerequisite for almost every student.

To innovate, to create, you must be free of the limits. You must break and destroy to build. I find it curious that the ODD diagnosis says that while we all show "symptoms" of ODD, what makes a person ODD is their extreme quick impulsive No to AUTHORITY.

I say, "i'm not arguing, I'm simply stating why I am right."

Maybe your son will grow up to be a brilliant lawyer. All I know is that I enjoy directing my energy towards arguing (as I am doing in this response), as does my oldest and hubby. While I want to strangle my daughter because of this, I think it's a sign of a super active and critical mind. The world needs more critical minds, not more people submitting to authority. Some argue that mental illness is merely a natural response to impossible demands for sensitive minds ( RD Laing, Foucault), and by labeling them as illness we fail to see their magic (look up all the research on manic depression and genius, for instance).

Instead of seeing this as a negative, turn it on its head and help him channel his criticality towards something constructive and productive. Has he found his "thing?" If not, help him find his thing to direct this powerful, creative energy towards. It is a powerful creative energy J.B. it's the very spark that lights fires of creation. yes, it is destructive, yes it questions authority, but it is the very stuff of creation.

I do not have 1st hand experience. However, I was listening to NPR this week, and there was an interview that struck me. They were interviewing a woman who is a successful artist. At one point, the interviewer said something like: So, you were diagnosed with ODD in middle school, were kicked out of 1 school, and struggled through high school. How did you overcome that to be successful?" She answered (again, paraphrased): Yes, if I was a teacher, I would have hated me. But some kids just aren't meant to sit and learn in a traditional classroom."

I'm not trying to trivialize the diagnosis or your struggles. But rather, I hope that you'll see this as encouragement that kids who don't fall into traditional stereotypes can be successful, sometimes in non-traditional ways. I hope with therapy, you can help him find his way, regardless of the diagnosis.

I've always suspected my sister is ODD.
She's in her 50's and been this way since WAY before there was any label for it.
She's doing alright - but she definitely spends a majority of her energy "towards arguing with people and acting like the rules don't apply to her.".
"Drama" should be her middle name.

Learning some coping techniques (both you and your son) might help smooth out some of the rough edges - and there's a possibility that he might someday out grow some of this behavior - but for some people - it's just who they are and there's no "fixing" that.

Good luck!
All I can say is - don't rescue him from the consequences of his decisions.
Some people can't learn from the mistakes of others - they have to learn by making their own mistakes and then dealing with the aftermath.

a good friend of mine has a son who has been diagnosed with ODD (and a host of other lettered syndromes.) it's been a super-challenging ride. he's 17 now, and could probably be considered a 'failure' by most measures of homeschooled kids. he didn't learn to read until he was in his tweens, and still only does so reluctantly, and has been unable to earn a GED.

he's also sweet, charming and a joy to be around. at least for me. his mom has her days of wanting to strangle him.

and he's a mechanical prodigy. he can tear down, rebuild, diagnose and improve engines like nobody's business. he weaseled his way into an apprenticeship at a local garage, and has dreams of working on the big guns at monster truck shows and tractor pulls. he can probably do it.

he's got a girlfriend (NT) and his folks are thinking that it if works out, it'll be the sort of paradigm where she has to handle all the practical stuff if they end up living together. they'd been wringing their hands over how he'll get by in the world if he's not going to live at home forever. he's SO resistant to learning basic skills like money-management and organization. he'll read an engine manual, but will find all sorts of ingenious ways to duck out of reading 'boring' stuff.

all of the solutions for him will be odd and quirky. i'm not sure how to handle someone whose every instinct is to buck whatever he's told.

but you're the gal to do it! you beat the odds every time. i hope to read about your coping methods and solutions going forward.
khairete
S.

No, I don't have a child with it. I work with someone who may have some ODD traits. She has always been difficult for most management to work with and to be honest, I often go into asking her to do a task with the gut instinct that she is going to either hand it back or argue as to why someone else isn't doing it, but we get through it. For the most part, I see her as more of a procedure, by the book type person. If it is not in the procedure (not everything fits) and it is not on her list of duties, she is going to spend 1.5 hours trying to tell you why she should not do it, when she has nothing else to do.

She is an extremely detailed employee. She makes minimal mistakes and once she is assigned a task, she will have it done by the deadline every time.

With those two sides of her, I am glad she is on the team. She is there everyday and I just have to make sure I have everything outlined for her. It's a little extra work for me, but in the long run, it is worth it because she is a good hard working employee.

She has shared with me that her husband does the budget. She says if he tells her it is not in the budget, she tells him to rewrite the budget. So "can't" isn't one of her big problems. There can be some good strong traits in that type of person. If it were me and I were going to do therapy, I would do family therapy because I think there is has to be some balance. Perhaps your son is not like the rest of the family, so everyone in the family needs to understand him as a person too.