Anyone Have a Behavioral Toddler That Later Ended up Diagnosed with Bipolar?

Oh my goodness yes. However I had no idea that my son was bipolar when he was little. He did so many things that confused me because my older son never did them. I just assumed he was -no pun intended-the polar opposite. Fast forward to age 18 and he was diagnosed with Bi-polar 1. It took years to understand some of the peculiar things. He was hospitalized a couple of times, used meds prescribed to him and evened off from time to time. Here would take too long to write so many indicators of things that could have been information and I hope if anyone questions their children's behavior that they research it. Sometimes they are not just lazy or stubborn or emotional.He lived in and out, attended many years of college wanting to be an actor. He is now 28, back at home, but attending an online college for business and works part time. He still sees his doctor but he has off and on done things that sadden us. I won't give up and anyone out there who wants to privately share please do so. I myself looked for a support group, got excited and signed up for a class only to find out a day before that he was too old for this particular group. Maybe we can be supportive of eachother.

I have a child that was diagnosed with Early Onset BiPolar Disorder (EOBPD) at 5 years old. We believe that his birth mother was bi-polar and the psychiatrist at the time who diagnosed our son felt that with a close family member having bi-polar, it wasn't out of the realm of reality to have a child with the same diagnosis. He is 18 (well, next week) now and currently resides in a 24 hr awake care institution with locked doors due to his extreme mental health issues. However, in our case, he also has a host of other mental health issues due to Reactive Attachment Disorder, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, and being Developmentally Delayed.

The good thing about him being diagnosed so young (even if the diagnosis isn't correct) is that it allows access to medications that ended up stabilizing him to some degree at the time. We were able to muddle through until he was 14 - much longer than anyone thought we would be able to keep him home with us.

I did belong to several support groups early on - I left all of them. Why? Well, it was really made up of people who just wanted to sit around and complain and take no action OR were self-diagnosing their kids. It would be so frustrating to listen to someone complain over and over about this or that, but when he or she received positive and useful advice on how to deal with something, they simply wouldn't do it. It was almost as if they liked being miserable instead of finding ways to actually solve some of the issues (like school, IEPs, social services, police issues, etc). If you do find or start a group, I hope you are able to have better luck and success than I did.

As an aside, are you simply self-diagnosing your child or has a licensed professional actually diagnosed him?

I do not, however, I have a relative who is bi-polar who I was close to growing up. She did not exhibit any behaviors as a young child. She was fun loving, and well behaved.

Her behavior started to appear perhaps around puberty (teen years) when she seemed overly emotional and she had depression - self harm, etc. She went on to get progressively worse, and then was diagnosed formally as a young adult.

Her children - did not have any behaviors as children - however, one was later diagnosed with depression as an adult. Depression runs in their family.

Not sure if that helps.

As far as feeling guilty/bad - I can relate to that but you have to let it go.

One of my children was misdiagnosed with a condition as a toddler. Another has anxiety and it took us years to figure that out.

I was not the best parent - because I didn't realize and I was scrambling trying to 'get it' and I kind of ignored my other kids at times, dealing with those ones. You do the best you can, with the knowledge you have, at the time.

The important thing is - we're not perfect, they don't expect us to be - they just know we love them. We learn and do better :)

Don't beat yourself up too much. There's no point and it won't do any good - especially for your kid. They wouldn't' want you to.

Best to you

Hope you can form the support group! sounds like a great idea.

I am not familiar with the problem but I hope you won't continue to beat yourself up about this. It must be in our DNA to take the blame for even things a doctor could miss. But that's what we do, right?
I don't know how you could have known sooner. To diagnose a toddler with bipolar must take a lot of evaluation given their personalities and behaviors in general at that age. And that diagnosis sounds unusual even given your family history.
But now you have a focus. Move forward and good luck in your efforts.
I hope you get some helpful feedback on this. Carry on.

Hindsight is always 20/20, isn't it? You cannot torture yourself that you should have known. There is no reason to assume that his anger/tantrum issues were anything other than that. Even if they were early signs of bipolar disorder, his pediatrician, teachers and school nurses never picked up on it either, right? And maybe the bipolar kicked in later.

I hope that you are pursuing your studies so that you can learn more and help others, and not because you want to be totally consumed by your son's issues. I think it's terrific that you see the need for a support group, and I hope you will reach out in your area to find one. It could be bipolar-focused, or related to a variety of mental health issues, because all of those parents and family members can be a resource to you. It's not just about you supporting others - if you are feeling guilty, then you need to receive support too, and probably before you can provide it to others.

Perhaps there is a NAMI chapter in your area? Perhaps your professors or other school personnel can help you?

Our son's severe ADHD-combined type was obvious at two, looking back. I remember a friend warning me her son was extremely active and meeting him he looked like he was on sedatives compared to our son. Our son ran around the gym at Diaper Daredevils class, while the other kids stayed with their parents. He was aggressive with other kids at daycare and had zero impulse control. Off the charts energy. Take him to a park, he'd run around like crazy and just come home waiting for the next great thing. We put a bounce house in our living room to help him burn off energy and he broke it with heavy use. We wrote if off as having a very active boy and started reading "parenting boys" and "parenting spirited kids" books.

By three, preschool was not happy and we were getting threats of him being kicked out (they eventually did). We tried all sorts of parenting strategies to no avail. Finally asked for medical guidance from the pediatrician and he knew right away this wasn't normal and referred us to a child psychologist. Our son was treated for strong indicators of ADHD, but they wouldn't diagnose until he was five. Since then, we've heard from multiple therapists over the years that our son was one of their most extreme cases of ADHD and difficult to treat.

You can't beat yourself up over not knowing. We, too, had people tell us he'd outgrow the energy, he's just an active boy, etc., which really just made us feel worse because we couldn't change the behavior, no matter what we tried. It ultimately took medication to give our son a chance at a normal life and fit in.

How were you supposed to know? I think it's better that you didn't just immediately assume anything.
My middle son has been quite the handful since early on. Tantrums, rages etc. We have been to multiple counselors and were always told "he'll grow out of it." And there have been times we wonder if that is true. He has never been diagnosed with anything, but we have wondered. With that said he HAS gotten much better. But of course if a professional had ever shed light on to WHY he was this way, it would have been a combination of relief and guilt. Parenting an "average, or normal" child is challenging enough. But when you have behavior issues, or a diagnosis it of course is even more challenging.
Don't beat yourself up...easier said than done I know. I have cried myself to sleep many nights wishing I had done better, stayed calmer, understood why things were happening. But we can only do the best we can.
Now that you know, you will be better supported hopefully!! Hang in there mama.

I think you'll learn in your education that while behavioral patterns look obvious in hindsight when someone is later diagnosed with a mood disorder, behavioral disorder, neurological issue, etc. that it isn't really that simple. If it were, diagnosis and treatment would be much easier than it is.

Some kids who have difficult behavior when they are younger end up being neurotypical. Some kids who later get a diagnosis didn't have obvious behavioral issues at a young age. My oldest son, who has inattentive-type ADHD, was a cranky, high-needs baby who seemed unhappy most of the time. He was evaluated at age 3 and determined to just be a normal, but moody, three-year-old. He chilled out a lot at age 4 and didn't have behavioral issues but struggled in school and was diagnosed with ADHD at age 7. My second son was a super-happy baby/toddler, a delight at daycare, but aggressive, stubborn and excessively talkative as he got older. He was diagnosed with combination-type ADHD in 6th grade when executive functioning issues became obvious and his grades tanked. My ex-husband was by all accounts a sweet and easy child, yet he has bi-polar depression. There are a lot of good reasons that these things aren't usually diagnosed until children get to elementary school age or older, even adulthood...many children do mature and outgrow difficult behavior, and others don't have any problems until later in life. You can't possibly know what it will be - give yourself a break!

I think one of the things you can do as a future clinician will be help families regardless of whether or not there is a diagnosis. As you know, when you're in the thick of difficult behavior when kids are young and it's too early for a diagnosis, it can feel incredibly isolating. Being able to reassure parents that it's not their fault and give them access to techniques, therapies, etc. that can help in the here-and-now could be very rewarding for you and helpful for them. My community has a great support system in our SEPAC (special education parent advisory council) but it's through the school system so a lot of families don't know about us until their kids are in school. Groups that families could find through their pediatrician's office or child care setting if they use daycare would be great as that's where the youngest kids are already.

Thank you for using your experience to prompt you to pursue this as a profession. There is such a desperate need for professionals to serve the pediatric mental health community. One of my good friends is currently in a nurse practitioner program specializing on pediatric mental health because she has two children on the autism spectrum and one with other mental health issues. She worked in social work for a couple of years and saw the glaring need for providers who can prescribe and manage medication for pediatric mental health patients, so she decided to become one. It's a hard program, but her own kids and the families she served in social work motivate her to push through.