Anxiety About Daycare Starting in 3 Weeks!

Hi...I'm actually experiencing something similar with my 9 month old at daycare. From the beginning, we were doing the combo feeding, but he prefers breast feeding. Sometimes he did scream all day at daycare, but now he's transitioning a little better. It's been about a month.

My only suggestion for you is to pump milk and store it in the freezer. He may take that a little better than formula. You can also buy those bottles that allow babies to feed slower. I hope this helps.

Don't worry, they eventually do get used to other care givers. It's just a phase. Sometimes the initial adjustment is difficult.

I was exactly where you are in mid august. I was so worried about my daughter who would not take a bottle at all and who was/is so attached to me that she wants almost nothing to do with my husband. Here is what I did...First I spent several days going to the daycare w/ my daughter just to visit and get her used to it...(also good for getting a feel for the care providers and becoming comfortable with them). Then I left her the first time for 1 hour, next day for 2, next for three, next four. Then the whole first week I only worked half a day. I was so sure that she would have such a hard time adjusting. I was sure that she would scream and cry the whole time, like she did when I left her with my husband. I was so sure she would starve because she refused the bottle. Well she did not cry the whole time; in fact she cried very little. They were able to soothe her to sleep better than my husband ever had. It turned out that she really liked watching the other babies--as soon as I would walk in the room with her she was craning her neck to see what was going on. She really adjusted very well. Everyday when I came to pick her up I was surprised at how great she had done that day. As for the bottle, she did hold out for the whole first week and I was sooo stressed and worried that she would never take one. But come second week she started taking the bottle and now even takes a binky--which she never would before. The binky is a big help for my husband when he is watching her because she always wants to nurse to soothe herself. She still wants me instead of my hubby and will often scream till he gives her to me. But the whole daycare thing turned out so much easier than I thought. The first day was probably harder for me than her. Just try to stay busy at work so you will not drive yourself crazy with worry. And you can always call to check on him. Good luck!

I also had similar anxieties (with both my children). Here is some advice from a caring working mom. 1) since you choose top-quality daycare for your infant, these women you will be leaving your child with are experts in infant care. They know all the techniques and while there may be an adjustment period of a week or 2, your child will adjust well with all of your help. I guarantee it. My children needed me to sleep and feed but with the help of trained caretakers, learned to do it with the help of others. 2) I remember being surprised with my first that at around 3 months, she started to change. There must be some developmental changes that occur that make them more ready for daycare and perhaps this is the reason why it is common time for moms to get back to work. I was as anxious as you and distinctly remember things with my then close to 3 month old starting to settle a bit and routines being accomplished more frequently. I also distinctly remember at 7 weeks wondering how the hell this was ever going to work. She still wasn't taking a bottle from my husband etc. We kept trying and by 3 months she was able to. Perhaps where you are at now (at 7-8 weeks) is also a common time to worry about these things.

I hope that I was helpful. You are not alone and your worries are common. I want to assure you that it all worked out with both of my girls and while transitions are always tough- you will get through this one!
Good luck.
K.

I do in home day care and this iswhat I tell new moms. Sleep on a burp cloth for 2 or 3 times. send that with baby first day so when provider holds baby with burp cloth the provider smells like mom. Send a slept on burp cloth with baby every day for at least 1week. This should help baby. Som moms sleep on the port a crib sheet as well. Hope this helps. L.

I can totally relate. I went back to work when my son (now 4) was 8 weeks old. Here's the best advise I can give you: Stop worrying about it. Your experiments at home aren't working because YOU'RE THERE. Your baby does not understand why he should practice with the bottle. He know's mommy's upstairs with the boobies, so of course he wants that.

Keep having dad offer a bottle, or offer him the bottle yourself (counter to what most books say, my son would not take a bottle until he took it from me... the day before I went back to work... I think he didn't understand it was the same stuff... after that he'd take from anyone.)

Good luck mommy.

T.

B., this stuff does happen, but you are on the right track having husband offer him a bottle. Now, go find different kind of nipples. There are nipples that are more like the breast - get several.

Instead of just a night bottle, try to hold off on feeding the baby and let your husband come home from work and offer the bottle. You are pumping, right?

I know you are worried, but the truth is, the daycare ladies are very good at handling this sort of thing. They will get your baby on a schedule for eating and sleeping. Trust them to be able to do this for you and the baby. The best thing you can do right now is continue to give your husband the responsibility, no matter how hard it is for him. Tell him to stop bringing the baby back to you. He has to continue to try. This lasts just 3 more weeks, B., unless he is successful and wants to keep on doing it (or if you want him to.)

By the way, the more anxious you are, the worse it is for your baby. Your husband is anxious too, but the daycare ladies are used to this and will do just fine.

Good luck going back to work. I've done that, and I know it's hard.
Dawn

Hi there. I had a similar situation with my little girl at about the same age. Actually we started more like 6 weeks as I knew I would have to go back at 12 weeks and she wholeheartedly refused the bottle from me or my husband. I did what one of the other posts suggested, and went out to buy one of every nipple/bottle I could find. We tried them all, no luck. THen finally a friend of mine who had had a similar experience told me to try playtex drop ins with a LATEX (not silicone) nipple. That was the first bottle she actually started to take. She turned out to be fine when it came time. ANd after a few months I was able to try the medula bottle I was using for pumping with a gerber later nipple and she would take that, which was much easier than the drop ins.

anyway, I would keep trying but not "force" her to do it now, she'll adapt to it when it's time and you will be fine. Congrats and good luck.

Hi B.

First of all, I'm sure that both he and you will do great, even if the start is a little bumpy.

I would up the number of bottles that you give him during the day starting tomorrow. Do two tomorrow (one in morning and one at night) and in a week, up it to three. It will get you used to the routine of pumping and him used to taking more bottles than nursing. And, I'm probably going to get beat up for this, but don't give into him. He needs to learn how to drink from the bottle for his own sake and for yours. If you give up and put him to the breast, then he's going to not take the bottle.

I am 100% sure that other people will be able to console him. He'll do great. Honestly, he's so little that he will roll with it so much better than an older child. Try to spend your last few weeks home with him enjoying it rather than worrying. Best of luck.

I know some women go visit and nurse on their lunch hours, is that possible? Keep having your husband try the bottle.

First congrats and welcome to motherhood. Second he is feeding off your emotions right now so relax and enjoy him as much as you can. Have you visited the center to see who is taking care of him? This may relieve some of your anxiety. You both will get through this believe you can and you will. Good Luck!
J.