Almost 2 Year Old Will Not Eat

Karen in GA is right on. Fix her a plate of whatever YOU are eating (do not make a special meal for her...that just gives her what she wants and will only create a picky eater). If she eats it, great, if not fine. She won't starve herself. Unless she has a serious weight issue (aka needing to gain a lot of weight or something), you shouldn't push food on her. Sometimes you just aren't hungry. It doesn't need to be a fight or just like any other human, she'll want to "win" that fight. I hope that makes sense. Good luck! I've got two boys who eat like a horse one day and like a bird the next. I don't make an issue of it. I know they'll make up for it at their next meal.

Is it possible that she has a BM problem that makes her not want to eat?

Hello, I struggle with my 2 year old too, but she really had problems at meal time when she had some teeth problems/sensitivity or cavity. Hopefully, that is not the case but I know first hand that can cause meal time battles.
My daughter has lots of bad habits so we are working on them now. Sometimes if I let her help me make the food she eats better. Also, she loves it when I pretend to feed a stuffed animal. Then the stuffed animal wants her to take a bite! She will take a bite if the toy wants her too.
I hope this helps. Also, milk kills my daughter's appetite so I have to wait until she finishes her meal to give it. If I give it her milk at lunch I have a hard time getting her to eat dinner.
I hope this helps. It is no fun and so very frustrating when they don't eat!!!
Have a great day!

She's probably not hungry. There is nothing wrong with a child her age not wanting to eat. I remember when I had my first child and when he hit 2yo, he stopped eating. He didn't eat enough to sustain a bird! Honestly! I talked to the pediatrician about it. She said, not to worry...it's pretty normal. It was, so I didn't worry about it. After he went through that 'growth spurt', he got back to eating. It did take a while though.

I would use Love and Logic if you are looking for something. I love it. www.loveandlogic.com

My son has always been disinterested in meals and/or food. It started at about 6 months when we introduced baby food and has hadn't stopped and he's 7 years old now. As a baby he would sometimes goes days refusing to eat food. At one point I tried to force feed him, which ended terribly with me in tears and baby food everywhere. His pediatrician explained to me that he wasn't going to starve himself and to not attempt to force him to eat again. Eventually I learned to not panic over it and comforted myself by introducing liquid vitamin drops into the picture. This way I knew he was at least getting the very basic nutrients he needed. As he got older meal time became miserable. There was crying and frustration and sometimes anger and I just didn't know what to do so back to the pediatrician we went and the doctor told me to first try smaller snacks throughout the day as some children don't do well with 3 meals and 2 snacks a day and actually do better if they eat a little every few hours. This worked for awhile but dinner time is an opportunity to gather everyone around the table to discuss our days and spend some time together and we didn't expect him to eat a full meal but we did want him to eat something and we planned his 3 hour snack time around dinner time so that he would be ready to eat a little something. This worked sometimes but more often than not it turned into an issue because he was refusing to eat. His pediatrician then told me to allow the snacks every few hours but that come dinner if he refuses to eat then to explain that he will not get anything else the rest of the night and that if he gets hungry he'll have to wait until the morning. This was harder on me then him because he would agree to the terms but then come bed time he was hungry and would cry and then I would cry because I felt like a bad parent for sending my child to bed hungry. I stuck with it though and he now understands that if he refuses to eat even a little come dinner that he will go to bed hungry so we no longer have the battles at dinner and we've been able to get back to a normalcy during meals. It's not easy as a parent when you have a child that doesn't want to eat but as a parent your job is to make sure you train your children and so unless you want to continue with this battle every evening you will have to draw a line and then stick to it no matter how badly you may want to give in.

Good Luck!

Welcome to the 'terrible two's'!! Best thing to do is ignore the crying and fit throwing. She may get louder and more assertive because of that, but when she realizes she isn't getting any type of responce out of mommy or daddy, she'll stop. As far as meals go. Have her sit at the table for all 3 meals and make her a plate. If she doesn't eat it then she doesn't eat it. Don't try to force or brib her to take a bite either. Just make her sit there during the meal. Offer her snacks during the day between meals as well but things like bananas, apples, ets. Healthy stuff. If she still throws a fit at the table, remove her and put her in time out. Explain to her that that type of behaviour is not allowed at the table and then let her sit back down. If she does it again, back to time out for 2 mins. Kids won't starve themselves either, so don't stress if she skips one or two meals or only eats a few bites. She'll start eating again when she is ready, all you and dad have to do is stay calm and pick your battles!

Good luck!
S.

Both of my boys did the same thing. I think that she's just trying to assert herself. Two year olds have an overwhelming need to control their surroundings. While they don't have control over much in their lives, one thing they can control is whether they eat or not. Just remember, she WILL NOT STARVE. I know that it's hard, but I agree with the other poster. Fix her a plate for every meal. If she doesn't eat, she doesn't eat. I would not allow her to get up from the table until everyone else is done, though. That sets the precedent of getting up and down during mealtime and that's a hard habit to break. Offer her snacks at set times throughout the day, but no more. Eventually, she will begin to eat again. Welcome to the twos!

K. in GA

I am not sure what to tell you except that my youngest son, who just turned 10, doesn't eat very much and will often tell me at meal times he is not hungry. He has done this ever since he was old enough to eat table food. He has never been a big eater. He is not a picky eater. He is just not a big eater. I have taken him to the pediatrician, time after time, and they finally talked me into seeing an endocronologist Dr. I did everything they told me until they suggested steriods and then I was out of there. My 10 y.o. only weighs 44 lbs. He is smaller than his peers but very healthy. When he is hungry (at meal times) he will eat and when he isn't, I encourage him to eat and if he isn't hungry, I don't push it. I'm not a push-over; I just know that my child is not going to starve and when he is hungry, I make sure it isn't junk food and he is getting the nutrients that he needs. I try to also make sure it is something he really enjoys. I don't center the meals around him, I just accomodate the menu to include a favorite. I also make sure he drinks plenty of fluids. Which leads me to one other thought. Sometimes, too many fluids, esp. if they are milk or drinks high in sugar, can fill a child up causing them not to be hungry at meal times. Also encouraging snacks between mealtimes can increase the metabolism and cause you to be hungry more often. Try things like dry cereal (cheerios), fish crackers, etc. Something light, not too filling, just a little handful, in her special bowl. My son is very active and very healthy. Now, I have two other boys who are 12 and almost 14 and they on the other hand are eating me out of house and home!!! :):):) I hope this helps. Either way, I will be praying for you and your daughter. C.

Hi E.,
I would suggest you look at this from a different angle. Why does she not want to eat? Eating is not a discipline, it is a joy when our bodies want and crave it. Her body neither wants nor craves it.
What if your daughter is experiencing digestive pain and she knows eating is going to make it worse. Her brain knows, her body knows, she just doesn't yet know how to explain it. Food sensitivities and allergies as well as fungal and bacterial overgrowths are huge problems with children. If she does not have regular (1-2X per day) bowel movements that are firm (not loose or hard), you can be sure she is struggling.
You can do a number of things to see if you can get improvement before you spend money on medical testing.
1) remove all cows milk products from her diet (milk, yogurt, ice cream, cheese). Substitute rice milk for her milk.
2) Add 1/2 tsp cod liver oil, 1-2 capsules of proibotics (emptied into juice), and even get some chewable enzymes (like Zyme Prime)
3) Remove all processed and non whole grains from her diet (yes, that means cheerios and gold fish).
Get to the basics with fresh meat, veggies, rice, fruit, etc.
Your daughter is trying to tell you something. Don't miss it assuming she is asserting herself or being willful. Find out why she is asserting herself - what is she crying for, listen closely. At worst, you will find that she feels better, is less grumpy, and more willing to work with you. If you want more info on how to do the testing, just send me a note. Thanks, J.

Funny, my 23 month old did the very same thing--threw a temper tantrum every time we put her in her highchair. She is now 2 and is eating fine. What she wanted was to go back to watching TV, I think. We never gave in, let her sit there and ignored her until she was done throwing her tantrum, then gradually she'd ask for the very same foods she turned down minutes ago. I know it's very frustrating, but like everyone else says, make them sit with you (don't force them to eat), and they will eat when they're good & hungry. Good luck!

S.

Well E., that happens sometimes. Make sure you are not giving her snacks close to dinner time. They will not starve in between and if they are hungry enough they will eat...something. Getting them to sit at the table can be a challenge, but as my Mom instilled in us and to this day, some of our best memories are with the family over dinner! My great nephew was one of those that liked to eat walking around the house. When the snacks were stopped, he actually started sitting down with them at dinner. From years of growing up in the Day Care and Montessori school system and as a past Montessori Directress, you need to set parameters and give an option. My great nephew and grandbaby "love" to "dip". So we make sure we have finger foods they can dip. Even the grandbaby won't neccesarily eat celery, but she will dip it into ranch dressing, eventually she will move to other foods after that. Chicken nuggets, dip it into honey mustard. Even if it is nothing more than bread or a cracker that they can dip, finger sandwiches are always good. It is a means of getting them to the table to eat and other foods will follow. If they won't sit in the high chair, hold them in your lap until they are eating something, then slyly move them to their chair when they are preoccupied. Cut sandwiches into shapes and talk about the shapes, get their mind off sitting for dinner and turn it into a fun time! They will eventually enjoy sitting with you at dinner. But remember their attention span is very short, so if you don't have something there to keep their attention, they will be gone in a flash. Always start with foods they like and then introduce them to other foods. My great nephew will be 3 in May. He now likes to come into the kitchen and "help". So he is now learning how to set the table. Their problem is that he likes bread. So now they have to give him dinner and the bread is for dessert or else he will eat nothing else. The grandbaby is 2 1/2 and she eats almost everything! From spinach dip to deviled eggs! As long as they can dip......it is good! Hope this helps!

hi E., i have twin 2.5 y/os. just have a set schedule. breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner. make her sit at the table or in her high chair everytime. she WILL eat.if she misses a meal she will be fine. when she is hungry she will it. and praise her for eating like a big girls. i bribe with desert. which can sometimes is raisens or apple sauce. it doesn't have to be a cookie. my kids will take raisens or apple sauce over cookies. weird i know.but the(easter bunny loves carrots and healthy things)my kids buy it.lol my children are very very strong willed and this is what i was told to do by mom my with 4 children. dont let her eat when ever. set times and stick to it. if she doesn't want to eat after a few minutes of whinning or crying let her go. if she gets hungry sit her back in her seat and re heat dinner or give her what she was offered the first time. its hard but in 2 or 3 days she will get the point. you just have to be consistant. its hard i know. its so much easier to not hear them cry of not fight them to do something. but it always bites you in the butt. good luck.
P.

our children did the same thing...quite a bit younger though. my first would refuse foods sometimes and gobble them up at other times. my second just doesnt like meat. we make them eat one small bite. giving them only that bite on their plate until it is finished, they have gone to bed without dinner once or twice, we also cut out snacks closer than 2 hrs before a meal. we figure starving children in africa would eat whatever they were offered, so if we arent being unreasonable then our child can eat one bite of something they dont like very much. they LOVE green veggies so we have to hold them until last or nothing else will get eaten!

Honestly she's 2, every 2 yr old has eating issues. The less of an issue you make it the less of an issue it will be. The eating fight is one you will NOT win. especially at 2. Put food on her plate you know she likes and leave it at that. And at this point she's big enough to eat at the table with mom and dad. get a booster with a seat belt , one that fits on a regular chair and pull her up to the table.

For other times don't give in to the whining and crying EVER. make her ask for things nicely with a please in there. make her use her words. as for books I can't recommend one for this cause I didn't use one so no advice there.

We also had to make sure we stuck to meal and snack times, they do at prek's so to prepare our kids we did the same plus the not eating at those times and the crying. We had a few boys miss meals but once they got on schedule and didn't get to munch off and on during the day when they wanted it got better. I also did something I think helped I started with a small shot of a smoothie to get those taste buds going and help stop the crying, it worked for my boys but it's different for everyone....in fact now that they are older if they tell me they aren't hungry I make a smoothie and put some in dixie cups those small once and tell them to taste test for me, they do then it gets them going to eat and while eating I start mixing more I tell them I should have this done by the time you finish....I do and they get the rest.
Best of luck it will work out she will eat once you find a way to get her to the table and not cry so much....also maybe a book able dinner time for her age would help her and cut some of the trama.

Good-Morning E...I had forgotten I joined Mamasource, funny though. I am having flashbacks from my own eldest daughter who is now 22 and graduated college this past yr. Yes..It is very frustrating, sad sometimes because you want you child to eat as healthy as possible..My daughter at the same age we would actually harness her in the hi-chr.and she would try to stand up.Sometimes kicking & screaming just to sit there..Which might be time to get a "Big Girl" tell her booster chair(strapped in around waist.) I used to also let her eat breakfast and lunch at her own little desk we set up with a good muppet movie..It was like eating popcorn while watching..Since I wasn't a huge breakfast eater & husband at work.Lunch..we would make it fun together..It had gotten to the point of if we wanted to even eat at a relatives house would get embarressing for her to sit still..The age of new independence..Dinner though when we can all come together as a family..Took some real loving, and maybe asking her to help make dinner at that age..But then a Praise of look what (her name) helped make for dinner. Or help even that young set the table..Of course no knifes, but if they have pretend plastic ones for her spot at the table.. I used to carry around cheerios in a baggie & a banana for break fast times. Rather than dealing with all the emotional crying to have her sit still when you have a Dr. appt to go to in the a.m. Encouraging that my second child I was pregnant with too when the first was the same age..Is a better eater! Also, in the morning I set up at the kitchen table I would have little educational things to do at the kitchen table.."Oh, gotta eat your breakfast first, then look what we are going to do today" Exciting..Even just tracing my dot to dot on a pc. of construction paper the Cap.ABC's..Like I said, picky..This last year of college she called me up one day and said "Mom guess what I ate broccoli today" I laughed so hard..Hang in there..with the second child coming, she will be back at the table. Best Wishes.. L. PS. I had my third child 6yrs. later (all girls) She actually is now 13 and my best food eater yet.

Try feeding her before you and hubby have dinner. I would send her to time out in her room when she does this as it will only escalate as you continue to give her attention and allow her to disrupt your meal. Let her scream and when she can settle down and not scream she can come to the table. It may take 2 or 3 times but you have to take charge and only accept behaviour that is acceptable at the table. V.