Aggression and Soy Milk?

Updated on January 17, 2013
A.B. asks from Oklahoma City, OK
17 answers

Our daughter, who is 2 years 2 months is aggressive with other children. I understand this is normal toddler behaivor to a point. My husband and I are both quite mild-mannered and do not really know how she comes by this, other than we understand again, toddlers just go through this stuff :) We get that. I do not feel she has any allergies. She is really well adjusted at home, the aggression has improved at home with guidance. I think we are really a pretty normal family :) My question is, does anyone else notice some aggression in their toddlers who drink Soy Milk vs. Cows Milk? We are not on Soy due to any lactose intolerance. She just wouldn't drink Cows Milk at age 1 so I gave her Vanilla Silk Soy Milk and she learned to like that.

I am going to wean her from the Soy miilk. I was just curious if anyone else may have noticed the same thing? I am not really interested in other input, to be polite :) Just curious about the soy milk connection.

I was asked what I consider to be aggressive behaivor. Our daughter tried biting, but this has greatly improved with encouragement. I am not aware she ever bit anyone successfuly at school. She still hits and pushes others down. She is much better at home, but it's my understanding that she's rough with the children in her class .... 6 months to 3 years. We have a baby on the way, if this had started after baby arrived I'd think this was jealousy. But, actually, I believe she's a strong-willed child and has a natural tendency towards aggression. She has grabbed a baby by the throat. But, truly she is not a monster :) She just happens to be the bully in her class :(

BTW, just checked our cow's milk. 11 g sugar. Vanilla Soy Milk 9 g sugar. :(

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A.C.

answers from Madison on

I supposed it's always possible that she could be more aggressive drinking soy milk if she happens to be allergic to it and/or has an intolerance to it--the body/mind works in weird and mysterious ways when there's inflammation. The only way you'd know that is if you take her off soy and have her drink a different alternative milk, like coconut, rice, hazelnut, oat, hemp, or almond.

4 moms found this helpful
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M.S.

answers from Portland on

I doubt it is the soy, but my pediatrician said that it can mess with hormones in the body so not to give it to my kids. Maybe it is doing that to her? I would switch milk either cow or goat if you can, otherwise, maybe just cut it out and see if you get any results. It sounds like a strong willed kid who hasn't learned to deal with all that is going on.

Usually kids who bully do it because the world around them is too much to handle. It sounds like she is getting coping techniques at home, but daycare is too much stimulus for her and she is acting out in the only way she knows how. Even though she can talk, she can't put all of this into words.

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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son has only ever drank soy milk (he's allergic to cow's) and he is not aggressive at all. Even as a toddler, he wasn't particularly aggressive. He's five now and, while he has all the normal hyperness of a boy his age, he's never one to hit, push, kick, etc.

My daughter, on the other hand, is the same age as yours (born Oct 2010) and is much more aggressive than my son ever was. She hits, pushes, scratches, pulls hair, etc. She drinks cow's milk.

I really don't think there is any link between the milk and the behavior. I think it's just in their personality.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.O.

answers from Detroit on

I just read a book that suggested that soy milk is not a good choice for babies or toddlers. I am sure there are articles and other books out there if you are interested. So, anyway, I wouldn't use soy milk for her based on my reading.

Isn't cow's milk natural sugar? And (vanilla) soy they add refined sugar? So that would be worse.
I would go cow! :)

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

Soy is actually not good for toddlers, if anything I would go with almond or rice milk, or even goat. If it is not a dairy thing then no harm in going back to cows milk, but most things soy should be avoided.

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M.F.

answers from Phoenix on

I would look first at the sugar she's consuming. Vanilla soy milk is super sugary and could be adding to some of the issues. Before you look for a cause however, focus instead on your reaction to these behaviors. It is normal for some toddlers to get aggressive, but it is a behavior that needs to be nipped in the bud quickly through firm rules, consequences and consistency.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

I haven't noticed a correlation; you could try an almond milk or rice milk.

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A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

If your two year old is responding to guidance and encouragement for these issues AT ALL, then she is not strong-willed, she's normal and maybe even easy. Two of my three needed straight-up FIRM discipline for their first normal attempts at aggression (and even my easiest needed more than just guidance, she needed a couple of real consequences), and many of their peers with "gentle positive parents" were EXTREMELY Aggressive for quite a long time and had to be "shadowed" for biting and hitting etc by daycare workers (who emphasized how common and normal this was) all due to lack of discipline.
I don't believe soy milk would make a child aggressive. Is it healthy? No. But, when I was a kid, we ate and drank practically radio-active snacks. My dad would have had none of that even behavior if we had snorted coke first (we didn't snort any coke). We would have had stinging fannies for hurting anyone and therefore we never did. She's just acting her age within the boundaries of what she gets away with. If she got a seriously uncomfortable reckoning for pushing or being rough with others, she'd stop. Not a popular approach now that everyone feels like you have to lead tiny tots by example, but truthfully, kids that age only care how THEY feel, not how others feel. It's normal. If she can hurt others and only get spoken to or intercepted, she's got no reason to control herself any time soon.

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K.L.

answers from Savannah on

Never had any problems with my son who is also 26 months, but he drinks regular or organic soy milk, no the vanilla. If you cut out the vanilla soy milk and see a difference after 2 weeks, then there could be a connection to either the soy or the sugar in the milk.

If there is no difference, then you will have to look up some resources to help with the behavioral issues. Good luck!

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T.P.

answers from Tuscaloosa on

Huffington Post just did an article about why soy is really not good for anyone to eat/drink, especially children. I'll try to link it for you. Soy mimics estrogen, the female hormone, in the body. I could definitely see where that could cause increased aggression in a child. We use almond milk instead. The vanilla almond milk is very sweet, so I have avoided that, but if your child likes the sweeter milks, you might try that first and then try to wean down to the "original" almond milk. The "original" is still a little sweet. The "plain" is not very tasty because it is not sweet at all. My DD had a rough 1/2 year at school last year (when she was 2). She got in trouble a lot for disobeying and being obstinate. She is very strong willed. This year, though, at 3 she has a better teacher and different kids in class and is doing MUCH better. Hopefully you will find the same!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-mercola/soy-health_b_###...

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

it's probably personality, but i really like that you're exploring dietary possibilities. and soy is really not all that great. i'd certainly wean her off the soy and try good organic cow's milk, or maybe almond or coconut milk if you don't want dairy. see if helps. and since you're obviously a sensible mama, keep working with daycare on consequences that teach her better behavior, just as you're doing at home. it's vitally important that they react swiftly there, at the time of the incidents. you can't retroactively provide a 2 year old with 'consequences'.
good luck, mama!
khairete
S.

L.L.

answers from Rochester on

I've not heard anything specific as far as a link between soy and aggression...however, (and this is just me) I wouldn't give my child soy milk unless I had to. You can buy Nestle Quick powder in a vanilla flavor, if that's what she likes (though it's a bit hard to find...check the Hispanic aisle at WalMart, that's where I find it).

My toddler girl, 2, is also fairly aggressive...and she doesn't drink soy milk. :) She's still nursing. Maybe it's just the terrible twos...I hope for our sakes!

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B.B.

answers from New York on

I think it's possible that there might be an allergy or intolerance although I have not specificially heard one like that. There are soy allergies though and they are common. My son has an intolerance to dairy and he would get very sensitive and emotional in addition to eczema. I would take her off the soy milk and see what happens. Give it a few weeks though.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

What exactly do you mean by aggressive with other children? Give an example. Thanks :)

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

She probably likes the soy milk because of the vanilla flavouring. I would try vanilla flavouring in cows milk.

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P.T.

answers from Tulsa on

I would try vanilla almond milk or adding some chocolate or vanilla flavor to cow milk. I used a little Ovaltine powder in my son's milk when I had a hard time getting him to drink it. Now that he is older he drinks it plain and he loves almond milk too. When he was 3 I started him at a preschool and he behaved so bad he would have been kicked out if I didn't pull him out. The next year I put him in a preschool with a smaller teacher-student ratio. There were only 10 kids in his class and 2 teachers at all times. He was one of the best kids in his class and has continued to be one of the best behaved ever since. I think he was too immature and the first preschool before was too chaotic for him. You might check into other daycare options for your daughter.

K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

We drink soy milk (one boy needed soy when lil' and the other boy just doesn't like the taste of cow's milk) and I have never seen any aggression beyond 'normal' kid stuff that would warrant any concern on my part.

~I know you said you are not interested any other input but maybe if you gave us some examples of what you consider 'aggressive' on your daughter's part maybe we could ease your fears/concerns? Maybe it is just 'normal' kid stuff?
They do call it 'The terrible twos' for a reason, ya know?!

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